Chapter 24 Feeling weak and sore – This is my first time, can you take responsibility for me…?
Xing Lan slept until almost noon, when she was awakened by the glaring sunlight streaming through the cracks in the window.
When he woke up, he had a splitting headache and felt weak and sore all over.
Although excessive drinking would definitely cause a headache, for some reason his arms and hands also hurt, his arms were completely unable to lift, and his thighs were numb, as if he had just done some strenuous exercise.
He groggily opened his eyes and heard someone breathing softly beside him.
Turning his head, he saw his roommate Li Baidong lying quietly beside him, his light golden hair falling down his forehead, obscuring most of his expression.
His normally fair complexion now appeared somewhat pale, his handsome brows furrowed, and faint tear tracks were visible at the corners of his eyes.
Li Baidong seemed to have experienced some kind of catastrophe last night. His hair was disheveled, his clothes were in disarray, his black hoodie was crumpled and wrinkled, and there were even dried bloodstains on the loose cuffs. It was unclear whose blood it was or where it came from.
This unusual appearance startled Xing Lan.
A terrifying premonition, like the cold dorsal fin of a shark, quietly emerged on the calm yet turbulent surface of the sea.
His wrist trembled slightly, his pupils quivered, and he tried to calm himself down. He tentatively used his hand to slowly push open Li Baidong's clothes and immediately saw several ambiguous and mottled marks on Li Baidong's shoulder and neck. The marks were red and purple on the skin, some deep and some shallow, very much like the marks that had been randomly scratched by someone during a moment of passion.
In that instant, Xing Lan even stopped breathing, and her mind, which had just woken up from her dream, crashed again.
A jumble of images flooded my mind at an inopportune moment; they were fragmented pieces, impossible to piece together into a complete truth.
Last night, he and Li Baidong were on this bed. He pinned Li Baidong down and looked down at him.
In his memory, Li Baidong looked pitiful and innocent. His wet puppy eyes stared at him, and he called him "brother" in a hoarse voice, as if trying to awaken the last bit of humanity in him.
"..."
Xing Lan's mind was chaotic and blank, like a burnt-out machine, just short of smoke coming out of its head.
What exactly happened last night? Why did Li Baidong look like he had been crying? Why were both of their clothes tattered? Why did he feel weak and sore all over? He couldn't remember anything, and he didn't dare to think about it.
In his panic, Xing Lan's breathing became rapid. Before he could compose himself, something even more terrifying happened.
Li Baidong woke up.
His eyelashes fluttered, and he slowly opened his eyes, immediately seeing Xing Lan sitting beside him, looking stiff and helpless.
The boy blinked his narrow phoenix eyes and called out softly, "Brother..." His voice trembled uncontrollably at the end, with a hint of sobbing.
Hearing his weak voice, Xing Lan felt an urge to slap herself twice.
He took a deep breath, trying his best to keep his expression steady, and tentatively looked at Li Baidong.
"We last night..."
Although Xing Lan got extremely drunk yesterday due to a social engagement, Li Baidong, who came to pick him up after receiving the message, must have been sober and should be able to tell him what happened last night.
Not everyone who loses control after drinking will have sexual relations with others; perhaps they just did something else, like having a simple and healthy fight in bed. Although Xing Lan knew this excuse was absurd, she couldn't help but think this way with a glimmer of hope.
The moment his eyes met Li Baidong's, he felt extremely guilty and ashamed, and dared not look at him for long, turning his face away with a heavy heart.
Li Baidong remained silent for a moment, then raised his fingertip to gently wipe the blood from the corner of his lips, his eyes flashing with a sickly cold light in the darkness where the morning light did not reach.
He watched as Xing Lan knelt beside him, fidgeting with his fingers with a look of shame and unease, turning his fair knuckles red. He immediately realized that Xing Lan had drunk so much that he had probably completely forgotten what had happened the night before.
In other words, no matter what he says now, Xing Lan will abandon his usual rationality and composure and choose to believe him unconditionally.
Li Baidong lowered his eyes and thought for a while, but the next second he immediately raised his face innocently, showing a pitiful and aggrieved expression like a little stray dog.
"elder brother……"
"This is my first time."
"Can you take responsibility for me...?"
As soon as the words were spoken, the room fell silent, yet it seemed as if countless shattering sounds exploded in the air.
The last thread that Xing Lan had been holding onto snapped completely.
After what felt like an eternity, he stiffly turned his head and awkwardly met Li Baidong's gaze.
Li Baidong's eyelashes trembled slightly, and almost instantly, a hot tear fell from his left cheek, slowly dripping down his thin face, making him look broken and helpless.
He clumsily took off his torn and shapeless black hoodie, hugged his bare upper body, curled up on the bed and cried sadly, looking exactly like a ravaged little yellow grass boy, as if the next step was to go to the bathroom and painfully wash his body while shouting "I'm so dirty".
"I'm sorry... I... I really didn't know..." Xing Lan looked at him helplessly, frantically wiping away his tears, "Don't cry... don't be like this..."
"Brother." Li Baidong sobbed, suddenly grabbing Xing Lan's wrist, tilting his head up, his tear-filled eyes staring intently at him.
That burning, excessively sorrowful gaze was like a silent, cruel judgment, causing Xing Lan's conscience to suffer immense torment.
He was completely thrown off balance by what happened last night. In his panic, he didn't notice that Li Baidong's grip on his wrist was getting tighter and tighter, and that his fingertips were gently and intimately caressing his thin wrist.
“Brother.” Li Baidong sniffed and said pitifully to Xing Lan, “You know, I only came to Ning City to study. I’m actually from a small town. We’re very traditional there.”
“My parents told me that I couldn’t date or have any relationship before graduating from university.” Li Baidong’s eyes were melancholy, and every word was like a sharp blade, cutting into Xing Lan’s already aching conscience. “They taught me from a young age that I should save my most precious first time… for the person I like the most.”
“If my parents find out about this, they will definitely beat me to death, and so will my grandfather.”
“My grandfather had a whip he made himself, which he used to herd sheep.” Li Baidong lowered his eyes and said as if he was still in fear. “That thing hurt a lot when it whipped people. If I made a mistake and got beaten once when I was a child, I couldn’t walk properly for a week.”
"He keeps that whip carefully at home. Who knows, he might take it out and use it one day if he's in a bad mood."
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." Xing Lan didn't know what to say, and could only apologize weakly over and over again. Her already pale face became even paler.
His thoughts were now completely led by Li Baidong, and he was completely unaware of the strong moral blackmail implied in the other person's words.
"Brother, you don't need to apologize to me." Li Baidong bravely wiped away his tears with the back of his hand, looked up at Xing Lan, and said with a forced smile, "It's okay, I know you didn't mean it. You drank too much yesterday and your mind wasn't clear. It's not your fault."
“If you don’t want to be with me, that’s fine. I can keep this a secret from my parents, and I can also keep it a secret from my ancestors when I go home to pay respects to them during the New Year. Even if it’s accidentally discovered, it’ll just mean being removed from the family genealogy. That kind of feudal and outdated thing is useless to keep; it should have been abolished long ago.”
"It's just that I might be gossiped about by the whole village. It doesn't really matter to me; I've always been a troublemaker since I was little, and everyone's used to it. It's just that my parents aren't in good health. They're getting old, and their blood pressure has been rising in recent years, and their hearts aren't doing well either. They can't handle any stress, and I'm worried..."
Li Baidong's tone was casual, but it sent chills down Xing Lan's spine, making her feel as if she were falling into an abyss.
Li Baidong is from Haishi, which was originally a small fishing village by the sea and not very developed. Its economy has only developed in recent years. Therefore, the older generation there is indeed quite conservative in their thinking, and the local customs are probably quite conservative as well. They value a person's chastity and believe that only married couples or couples with a stable relationship can have sexual relations.
Things seem to be getting more and more serious.
No matter how much self-blame and apology she felt, it was all in vain. The only effective way to apologize seemed to be to be with Li Baidong and have a proper relationship, which would not violate the family precepts passed down from Li's ancestors.
"I understand." Xing Lan forced herself to suppress her panic and stammered to Li Baidong, "Then... are you feeling unwell right now?"
"My back hurts a little." Li Baidong didn't hesitate for a moment and immediately started making things up. "Yesterday you hugged me and kissed and scratched me. When I tried to stop you, you even bit me."
As he spoke, he tilted his neck to the side, tilted his chin slightly, and eagerly showed Xing Lan the teeth marks on his shoulder, as if showing off a medal: "Right here, it was a really hard bite."
Xing Lan didn't dare look at the "evidence" at all. She glanced at it briefly and then looked away, coaxing Li Baidong in a low voice, "You...you should go take a shower first. I'll run you some hot water, okay?"
Li Baidong stopped showing the teeth marks, looked up at him, and nodded obediently.
Xing Lan's ears were completely red, and her eyes were filled with undisguised confusion. She was completely devoid of her usual composure and looked like a frightened little rabbit, blank and particularly cute.
Watching him frantically flee into the bathroom, Li Baidong couldn't help but reflect on himself, wondering if he had overacted just now.
But there was no other way. If he didn't do this, he and Xing Lan would have to remain just ordinary roommates, treating each other with polite distance but never getting along.
Xing Lan has always been a man of clear boundaries. If it weren't for the misunderstanding that the two of them accidentally crossed the line last night, he probably would never have considered Li Baidong as one of his own.
He originally intended to take things slowly, like boiling a frog in lukewarm water, but Xing Lan always unintentionally stirred up his strong, crazy urge to completely possess her.
Human hearts are never satisfied. At first, he just wanted to stay peacefully by Xing Lan's side, but now, he seems to be getting more and more greedy.
While Li Baidong was taking a shower, Xing Lan sat dejectedly in the room, irritably scratching her hair.
For some reason, he really wanted to smoke a cigarette, but he didn't smoke and hated the smell of smoke, so he gave up on that idea.
What's done is done, there's no use in dwelling on it or feeling regret. He used the time to quickly tidy himself up.
I happened to find his phone in the pocket of the clothes I wore yesterday, so I took it out and looked at it.
The latest message is from Lu Yan not long ago: [Thank you, Director Xing. I asked the hotel staff, and you were the one who helped me avoid drinking yesterday! (crying) (crying)]
The messages above that were all sent by Li Baidong.
Li Baidong: [Brother, it's so late, are you still entertaining guests?]
Li Baidong: [Video 7s]
Li Baidong: [Brother, the little prince keeps clinging to me, he probably misses you ^ ^]
Li Baidong: [Brother! Are you alright?!]
Li Baidong: [Brother!!]
Li Baidong: [I'll be there soon]
When Xing Lan was planning to step in to protect Lu Yan from unwanted advances, he anticipated that he would likely be the one forced to drink in the second half of the event, so he sent Li Baidong the hotel's location in advance.
He had been taking precautions, but unexpectedly, he actually got drunk and was left in the hotel with no one to care for him.
Before he passed out, he managed to send two messages to Li Baidong, both of which were just gibberish with only one or two characters. However, Li Baidong understood them immediately and sped off on his motorcycle to pick him up from the hotel.
On the surface, last night's events appeared to be about Li Baidong rescuing Lu Yan from President Liu, but in reality, Li Baidong also saved him from being abandoned by the company.
But he did that to his benefactor...
Xing Lan sighed deeply, stood up, took a large box of brownie nut ice cream from the refrigerator, and ate it expressionlessly while standing in the living room.
After finishing his ice cream, he calmed down considerably, but also made a decision he wasn't sure was right or wrong—
He can't be that bad; he has to be responsible to Li Baidong.
When Li Baidong came out of the bathroom after taking a shower, he saw that Xing Lan had changed into a new shirt, her face was clean, and her black hair was neatly combed.
It must be said that Xing Lan is a very mentally strong person. Even though he had just suffered an unprecedented huge shock in his life, in just over ten minutes, he cleaned himself up and looked refreshed. Apart from his face being a little pale, he showed no signs of yesterday's drunkenness or fatigue.
He turned to look at Li Baidong, as if he had made up his mind, and said in a very serious tone, "Li Baidong, I've thought it through, let's be together."
"I will take responsibility for you."
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Author's Note: To Li Dongdong: The stage isn't even set up yet, and you're already itching to act!
The next chapter will be released the day after tomorrow! [kiss][milk tea]
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