Chapter 36: With me here, I'm willing to be my brother's tool.
Xing Lan raised her eyes and looked at Li Baidong with a pained expression. Tears welled up in his dark, narrow eyes, and a complex mix of emotions welled up in her heart.
He pursed his lips, his expression indifferent, trying to brush it off: "It's nothing, I just accidentally fell."
How could you fall so hard that you hit half of his face? Li Baidong clearly didn't believe his nonsense. He still cupped his face in his palms, carefully examining the injury under the light, his expression extremely serious, as if he were inspecting a very precious artifact.
After a while, he stood up, went to the living room to get a medical ice pack, and applied it to Xing Lan's left cheek. While applying the ice pack, he kept his eyes fixed on Xing Lan.
Even though Xing Lan was the one who got slapped, Li Baidong seemed to be in more pain, his brows furrowed tightly and he couldn't relax them.
The atmosphere inside seemed too oppressive, making it hard to breathe.
Li Baidong was always smiling, as if he didn't care about anything. Xing Lan rarely saw him suddenly become so serious and cold. Even his handsome eyebrows and eyes seemed to have become sharper than before.
Xing Lan glanced at him, sighed slightly, and said in a nonchalant tone, "It's nothing. I just happened to see a couple arguing on the way, and I went over to mediate. I was accidentally injured."
"It just looks red, but it doesn't actually hurt." Xing Lan slightly raised the corners of her lips and smiled at Li Baidong as if nothing had happened.
Li Baidong lowered his eyes and remained silent for a moment, then suddenly said, "Brother, I was watching TV just now."
Xing Lan glanced at him, wondering why the boy had suddenly changed the subject so quickly, a hint of confusion flashing in her eyes.
"What are you watching? Cartoons?" he asked casually and nonchalantly.
Li Baidong slowly raised his eyes, his eyes slightly red, and stared at him intently.
"It's not an animated film, it's a talk show on the financial channel."
"...You're still watching this?" Xing Lan was somewhat surprised.
Li Baidong nodded slightly and said slowly, word by word, "In today's episode, the host interviewed a well-known local entrepreneur, Xing Yi."
Upon hearing this familiar name, Xing Lan's breath hitched, and her expression instantly stiffened.
"Brother," Li Baidong sniffed and asked softly, "the injury on your face, was it Xing Yi who did it? He's your father, isn't he?"
Xing Lan clenched her fists in secret, and after a long while, she finally hummed in agreement.
"I found this while cleaning the house." Li Baidong opened the bedside table and suddenly took out a small white medicine bottle.
These were psychotropic drugs that Xing Lan had been taking regularly.
Although his sleep improved gradually after Li Baidong came into his life, he began to reduce his medication dosage, sometimes even forgetting to take it altogether. He hid the remaining bottles of his old medication deep inside his dresser.
“I guess that’s why you asked me to be your roommate in the first place,” Li Baidong said, his head down, his tone ambiguous. “I looked it up online, and it’s generally not recommended for patients with this kind of illness to live alone because the condition is unstable and more likely to be triggered at night, which can be very risky.”
“My brother doesn’t have a good relationship with his family either. He came to me for treatment.” Li Baidong’s fingertips kept stroking the smooth surface of the medicine bottle as he looked up and met Xing Lan’s gaze.
Xing Lan met his deep eyes, and for some reason, her heart suddenly ached.
He had considered the day his roommate discovered his illness. Perhaps the roommate would find it unbelievable, horrified that he had been living with a mentally ill person like a ticking time bomb for so long, or perhaps they would fly into a rage, accusing him of hiding something so important. He was completely disregarding the lives of others in his pursuit of treatment.
To put it bluntly, this might even be considered a crime.
No matter how much she tries to cover it up, Xing Lan's intentions in looking for roommates online were never right, and her motives were selfish. She was simply using free rent as bait to treat people as her sleep aids.
“Yes, I am sick.” Xing Lan’s fingertips dug deeper and deeper into his palm, almost drawing blood. His lips were pale, his eyelashes drooped, and he dared not look into Li Baidong’s interrogative eyes. “I’m sorry, I… I shouldn’t have kept it from you.”
"I didn't mean to take advantage of you," he weakly defended himself. After thinking for a moment, he added, "If you hate me, you can leave anytime you want."
"Or what kind of compensation do you want? I can give you anything."
After Xing Lan finished speaking, he tentatively looked at Li Baidong. However, the other party did not speak, nor did he take the opportunity to make any demands on him. He just looked at him quietly, holding an ice pack in one hand and gently pressing it against his cheek.
That quiet, profound gaze was more cruel than countless questions, causing Xing Lan immense torment, and a layer of cold sweat gradually seeped out from his back.
"The interview said that Xing Yi is a good father and husband who balances family and career very well." After a long silence, Li Baidong spoke softly, "Brother, he's actually not that kind of person. At least not a good father to you, right?"
Xing Lan's expression froze.
The ice water in the ice pack gradually melted, and the outer water droplets dripped down, soaking the floor of the room.
Li Baidong took the ice pack away from Xing Lan's face, his hand, still damp with cold water droplets, gently pinching Xing Lan's thin chin. He examined him carefully in the light, his gaze deep and thoughtful.
Cold compresses are indeed effective. Although the application time is short, the abnormal redness has gradually faded, and the effect of reducing swelling is also very obvious.
He felt a little relieved, threw the used ice pack into the trash can, and then took out a few tissues from the bedside table to carefully wipe Xing Lan's face, which was wet with ice water.
“Xing Yi… is indeed my father, my biological father.” As Li Baidong wiped Xing Lan’s face with a tissue, he heard him lower his eyes and speak indifferently.
“When I was five years old, he had an affair with his female assistant at the time. The two of them spent every day from morning to night. Everyone in the company could see that their relationship was not right, but they denied it and kept saying that it was just a working relationship.”
“He used to go home occasionally, but later he stopped going home altogether. He secretly bought a house in the suburbs and lived there with his lover.”
“At first, my mother thought that Xing Yi was just acting on impulse, and she tried to persuade him to go home again and again. She even went to his company to beg him to change his mind. But Xing Yi only found her annoying and felt that she made him lose face in front of his employees. He not only hit her in front of everyone, but also deliberately promoted his mistress.”
“Because of him, my mother developed severe depression, and in the end…” Xing Lan closed her eyes, her usually calm voice gradually trembling, and said with difficulty, “She committed suicide by jumping off a building.”
“That day, I watched her jump off the balcony with my own eyes. She didn’t hesitate for a moment, and she didn’t even look back,” Xing Lan said sadly. “I almost called out to her… I almost did.”
“I got this disease from that day on. Over the years, Xing Yi has taken me to see many specialists, but it has never been cured. As I grew up, my disease became more and more serious, and the medicine didn’t work.”
"Until the doctor suggested that I find someone to live with, which might alleviate my symptoms. I initially just wanted to try it, but later found that it really worked."
"I should thank you. But... I'm sorry, I really did keep it from you."
Xing Lan's voice grew weaker, and his words became somewhat incoherent. His eyelashes were lowered, his thin shoulders trembled slightly uncontrollably, and his expression revealed deep pain.
He was thin, and his skin had turned sickly pale from excessive emotional repression. He was like the last leaf hanging on a branch in late autumn, about to be swept to the ground by the merciless cold wind, or like a thin piece of ice floating on a lake, ready to shatter at any moment.
"If you want to leave, then leave." Xing Lan forced her head up and looked at Li Baidong. "Every word I just said stands. I did lie to you before, but I won't lie to you forever. Please believe me, okay?"
Li Baidong looked into his moist, clear eyes, then suddenly leaned forward and brushed aside his soft, dark hair.
Immediately, a kiss landed gently on Xing Lan's forehead.
It was a very careful, cherished kiss, devoid of any passion or desire, fleeting and gentle.
"elder brother."
Why would you think that?
Li Baidong suddenly smiled lightly and raised his hand to pat his head naturally.
“You just got sick because your family didn’t take good care of you. How could it be your fault?” Li Baidong placed his large hand over Xing Lan’s and smiled casually. “But I also said that I haven’t had much insomnia since I came. That means I’m pretty amazing, isn’t it?”
The smile in Li Baidong's eyes was genuine, but Xing Lan couldn't believe it.
He seems... completely unconcerned about hiding his medical history and finding a roommate?
Really? Does Li Baidong really harbor no resentment towards him at all? Does Li Baidong really not hate him?
Is Li Baidong really not afraid that this mentally ill person might suddenly have an episode in the middle of the night and lose control, stabbing him to death with a knife?
This reaction completely surprised Xing Lan. He looked at Li Baidong, "You really... don't hate me?"
Li Baidong held his hand and shook his head firmly and without hesitation.
"My brother is sick. I only feel sorry for him. How could I possibly hate him?"
"I only hate myself. Why didn't I find my brother sooner? Then he wouldn't have had to suffer from insomnia for so long." Li Baidong grabbed Xing Lan's hand, placed it next to his handsome cheek, and gently rubbed it twice.
Xing Lan was stunned, momentarily speechless. After a long pause, he pursed his lips, "Don't you think I'm treating you like a tool?"
Li Baidong chuckled again, raised an eyebrow nonchalantly, and said, "I'm willing to be your tool, brother."
“Brother, since that’s the case, I’ll hold you while I sleep from now on.” Li Baidong looked at Xing Lan tenderly, his voice soft yet firm. “I will always stay with you, brother, and help you get better.”
"Your family isn't good, so from now on I'll be your family, okay?"
The rain outside was pouring down harder and harder, the downpour relentlessly pounding against the bedroom's French windows. A muffled clap of thunder boomed overhead, like a ferocious beast roaring in the darkness.
But this was the first time Xing Lan wasn't afraid; instead, she felt a sense of peace.
It was like the end of the world, with relentless tides threatening to engulf the entire world, yet Xing Lan had a safe house meticulously built for him by Li Baidong. Outside, fierce winds raged, but inside, it was peaceful, warm, and brightly lit.
Xing Lan recalled the hypocritical and indifferent looks people gave him when he was at the Xing family home. Then he looked at Li Baidong in front of him, and the boy's gaze was so sincere and earnest that it made people's noses tingle and their hearts soften.
He took a deep breath, and finally let down his guard. His body went limp, and he collapsed weakly into Li Baidong's arms.
Li Baidong patted his back gently to comfort him, then turned his head to kiss Xing Lan's freshly washed and dried black hair, which still carried a faint fragrance.
"Don't be afraid, brother, I'm here." He lowered his voice and said softly.
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Author's Note: Tomorrow's update will be a little late, around 11 PM. [heart emoji]
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