Chapter 55 The Moon Falls The moon falls... (The text abruptly ends here.)
“You don’t have to come with me,” Yu Kui said. “I’ll be at school quite late. You need to learn to relax too. You can’t spend all your time working. You’re still a vibrant college student.”
Xie Xingzhi: "I don't want to go alone."
"Aren't you staying at your classmate's house?" Yu Kui suggested, "Why don't you go with them?"
Xie Xingzhi looked out at the night scene. He wasn't staying at his classmate's house at all, but in a cheap rented room in a nearby town where even food delivery couldn't get through.
However, he wouldn't tell Yu Kui any of this, because given her personality, she would probably worry again.
“I don’t want to go out with them,” Xie Xingzhi said. “I’ll wait for you to come back.”
Yu Kui was silent for a moment, then suddenly asked, "I've noticed that you only want to go out and have fun with me. Why is that?"
Xie Xingzhi remained silent for a moment before saying, "I also play with other people, you just didn't see it. Don't make me sound so pitiful."
"Is that so?" Yu Kui asked thoughtfully.
"What do you think?" Xie Xingzhi asked deliberately, "How did you become so narcissistic?"
Yu Kui: "......"
"I'm not narcissistic at all," she refused to admit that she was overthinking things, and snorted, "Let's stop here for today, I'll be home soon."
Okay, good night.
After hanging up the phone, Xie Xingzhi stared blankly at the program on the computer for a long time before burying himself in his work.
After entering the residential area, Yu Kui went to the supermarket and bought the fruit that her mother wanted to eat, then slowly walked towards home.
Before she even stepped into the building, she heard someone call her from behind. Yu Kui subconsciously turned around and was somewhat surprised to see Qin You walking towards her from under the streetlight.
Did you call me?
"Hmm." Qin You walked to her side, feigning composure. "Do you have time now? I have something I want to tell you."
Qin You's voice was low, and his gaze was fixed quietly on Yu Kui.
Yu Kui was surprised that he would take the initiative to talk to her, something that would have made her feel flattered in the past.
Yu Kui's feelings were complicated. She said softly, "It's very late today. I need to rest. Can we do it tomorrow?"
Seeing that she was still as kind to him as before, Qin You's eyes subtly changed. "Let's go to the cat cafe tomorrow, you wanted to go when you were in school..."
“No need,” Yu Kui rejected his suggestion. “We can talk downstairs.”
Qin You paused, looking at her calm face, and pursed his lips without saying a word.
"If there's nothing else, I'll go upstairs first." Yu Kui had no intention of staying downstairs in the cold wind with him, and turned to enter the stairwell.
Qin You stood there, watching her retreating figure without turning her head, his eyes gradually darkening.
The next day, Yu Kui told her mother that she needed to go downstairs.
"Where are you going?" Yu's mother grabbed her hand. "It's so cold outside, and it's snowing again."
"I've taken care of a little thing, I'll buy you something nice to eat when I get back."
"Don't linger too long," Yu's mother said, looking at her daughter's increasingly beautiful features. "We're going back to school soon. I'll take you to get a haircut tomorrow."
"good."
After Yu Kui went downstairs, she saw Qin You waiting on the first floor. Although the snow outside was not heavy, the weather was very cold.
"Have you been waiting long?" Yu Kui walked over.
"No." Qin You looked up at her. She was wearing a thick down jacket and walked step by step to his side.
“Let’s talk here,” Yu Kui said. “We’ll be able to go home soon.”
"Let's go to the coffee shop at the entrance of the community," Qin You hesitated for a moment, "There are people walking around in the corridor from time to time."
Yu Kui thought about it and did not refuse.
Braving the wind and snow, the two walked to the coffee shop. Yu Kui ordered a cup of hot milk, and Qin You ordered coffee.
There were few customers in the coffee shop; they sat facing each other by the window, where they could see the bustling traffic outside.
Yu Kui couldn't remember the last time they had sat together so quietly; the memory felt like something from a past life.
"How have you been lately?" Qin You asked first.
"It's fine," Yu Kui replied casually, without any intention of greeting him.
"That's good," Qin You said, looking at her clear eyes and brows, which were still as bright as before. "I wanted to ask you how you were doing at university, but I didn't have your contact information, so I didn't bother you."
“Yes,” Yu Kui said, “I had a good time at university. I made some friends and every day was fulfilling.”
Seeing that she didn't mention "contact information," Qin You's voice became somewhat low, "It's a pity that I didn't get into the same university as you."
Yu Kui thought of the school he attended and didn't respond to him.
"Actually..." Qin You took a deep breath and finally looked into Yu Kui's eyes, "I really regret what I did before. If those things hadn't happened, I could have gone to City B with you, and we could still be each other's best friends like when we were kids."
Upon hearing this, Yu Kui looked into his eyes, trying to discern whether it was his true thought or a clumsy lie.
“Yu Kui, I’ve had a terrible six months. The university I’m in isn’t what I wanted. I’m filled with self-loathing every day. I keep asking myself, if I had focused on studying before the college entrance exam, if I had worked a little harder, would the outcome have been different? Every time I ask myself that, my heart is filled with regret.”
Qin You's eyes were a little red. He slowly said, "These are the kinds of questions I never thought about before the college entrance exam, but they've been holding me back ever since I got to college."
He didn't understand why he had become like this, when he was clearly an excellent student in both character and academics and was considered a top student by his teachers and classmates.
Too good for some jobs, too bad for others.
Even his former classmates, who were once inferior to him, could freely mock him.
He couldn't accept such a drop in status.
Yu Kui listened to him quietly without interrupting him.
“There are many things I didn’t understand in high school. By the time I finally realized them, it was too late. If I could go back in time, I would definitely not make the same choices.”
But time can never be turned back.
Qin You did not have another chance to choose.
The time that has been missed cannot be made up for just because someone is having a bad time.
He complained to her about these things because he felt that no one else could truly listen to his negative emotions except her, not even his mother.
Yu Kui stared at the hot milk in front of her, quietly waiting for him to calm down.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you this," Qin You said, gradually coming back to her senses as she saw that she had no curiosity about her. "I wasn't like this before. Maybe it's because I've kept these things to myself for too long that I've become a bit sentimental."
"Is that all you wanted to tell me today?" Yu Kui spoke up at the right moment: "Just wanted to tell me about your recent situation?"
Qin You stiffened, took a deep breath and said, "These things are secondary. What I want to do most is apologize to you."
Qin You seemed to have mustered up a great deal of courage: "I'm sorry, Yu Kui. My thinking was too naive before, and it caused you a lot of harm. I know I was wrong now. Can you forgive me? Let's be friends again, just like before."
His voice was very low as he spoke the last sentence.
"Like before, following behind you, doing whatever you say?" Yu Kui smiled slightly, but her true thoughts were unreadable.
Qin You immediately changed his words: "I don't need you to follow me anymore. Let's make progress together."
"Qin You, you just said that you have grown up and are no longer as naive as before. Do you really think you can grow together with me?" Yu Kui said unhurriedly, "I am in City B, and you are in this city."
"I won't stay here forever. I can go to City B for postgraduate studies later."
I wasn't talking about distance.
Yu Kui smiled and said, "I was referring to my time at Yanning University."
Qin You slowly raised his head. Yu Kui's face did not show the trust he was familiar with, but rather a calmness that sent chills down his spine.
"Qin You, you've grown up, and so have I. Neither of us are children anymore."
Yu Kui's tone remained calm throughout, "If we could still talk when we were in high school, I would follow you like I was chasing the moon. But now the moon has fallen, and I'm no longer the little girl chasing the moon. I've become my own moon."
Yu Kui looked quietly at the boy she had liked for a long, long time. "I like the moon because it shines brightly and is always hanging high in the sky."
Now that the moon has fallen, her affection has also faded.
"I can go to Yanning University too!" Qin You said eagerly, "I can take the entrance exam for your graduate program, I can..."
“Qin You,” Yu Kui interrupted him, “you know I used to like you a lot, right? Not just a friend’s liking, but a lover’s admiration, you know that, right?”
Qin You slowly avoided her gaze, his surging emotions instantly vanishing.
“Even if you don’t admit it, I know you know,” Yu Kui said. “You’ve known about my feelings for you for a long time, but you’ve never faced it squarely. Instead, you treat my feelings as a joke.”
"I don't......"
“You don’t need to deny it so quickly,” Yu Kui smiled. “I don’t mean to pursue any accusations. I just want to clarify some things, which is why I came out with you today.”
Qin You fell silent.
“When I was in high school, I dreamed every day that we graduated, I confessed my love to you, and then we went to the same university, got married after we got jobs, and we were together forever.”
"This was my best wish for the future back then. I hope that you will be there for me in every moment of my life, just like we promised when we were children, and that we will always be the most important person to each other."
"Back then, whenever I was about to lose control, I would desperately warn myself not to be impulsive and not to affect your grades. We still have many, many years ahead of us."
"But I never expected that the moment of one's appearance in life would be so important. Even if I had arrived more than ten years earlier, it would not have been as significant as the day Tao Jiang appeared."
Upon hearing Tao Jiang's name, Qin You's body stiffened even more. He looked at Yu Kui pleadingly, not wanting her to continue.
However, Yu Kui seemed oblivious to his pain. "Back then, I liked Tao Jiang so much. I treated her and you as my best friends. I was considerate of her in every way, and even took her place in a long-distance race. Even when I caught a cold and got sick later, I wasn't really angry. But what about you two?"
Yu Kui raised her head, "What do you and she take me for?"
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