Chapter 6 Redundancy
Upon hearing Mantou's words, Aman's expression darkened.
The young master's kindness last night almost made her forget that she wasn't welcome.
Aman lowered his head and pondered for a moment, then said slowly, "I'm not leaving. I want to stay here."
Her voice was low, yet firm, exactly the same as it had been the previous evening.
Fu Yunxiu just couldn't understand what was so appealing about this wretched place, Wutong Garden, that she wanted to stay. Before, those other people didn't even need him to kick them out; they'd stay one night, have one meal, and then she'd run away because she couldn't stand it anymore.
"What is it that makes you so determined, young lady? Can't you see? I'm just a useless person, an outcast of the Marquis's mansion. You won't gain anything by following me." Fu Yunxiu's expression was sarcastic, it was unclear whether he was mocking himself or Aman.
Aman looked up from his words, staring at him blankly for a long while before her lips parted slightly, "No."
Her voice was so low that Fu Yunxiu didn't hear what she was saying at all, especially when Aman was staring at him so blatantly.
Fu Yunxiu suddenly became very curious about what she had said, and he asked, "What?"
“I said, young master is neither a cripple nor a discarded pawn.” Aman spoke each word slowly and deliberately, each word striking Fu Yunxiu’s heart.
"Ha!" Fu Yunxiu laughed suddenly, as if he had heard something amusing. "Who do you think you are, daring to say such things?"
From the moment he was confined to a wheelchair, everyone in the Marquis's household regarded him as a cripple, their words carrying a deliberate or unintentional belittling, their eyes filled with a faint pity. If he still held onto a shred of resistance then, it completely crumbled after his father's death and the diagnosis that he wouldn't live past twenty-five.
The patriarch passed away suddenly, and no heir had been appointed. Amidst the competition among various factions, he, the eldest son, became a true pawn. In order not to get in the way of others, he moved out on his own, so that he could at least live out his remaining days in peace.
Mantou had followed Fu Yunxiu for many years and knew that his young master was most averse to others talking about these things, let alone that Aman had touched his sore spot.
Although my young master is aloof, he is always very polite in his dealings with others. Now that he has sworn at Ah Man, it is clear that he is really angry.
He tugged at Aman's sleeve, signaling her to stop talking, but Aman wouldn't listen and instead retorted, "Does the young master think those gossipy people outside are worthy of such attention?"
From the look in Fu Yunxiu's eyes when he spoke, Aman could see his disgust for the words "useless person" and "abandoned child." It was clear that he was still struggling internally, but in the face of public opinion, he ultimately succumbed and began to believe and despise himself.
"Do those gossiping people outside really understand the young master? Is what they say necessarily true?" In Aman's opinion, the real useless people are those in the village who steal chickens and dogs and idle away their time. They are lazy and good-for-nothing, and fighting is a common occurrence for them. Not only do they harm themselves, but they also harm others. Aman thinks that such people are useless.
The young master may have a leg ailment, but even so, he doesn't rely on others for everything. Instead, he does his best, spending his days reading and practicing calligraphy. He never complains about the food sent from the Marquis's residence. He's simply choosing a different way of life to take care of himself; how can he be considered a cripple?
Over the years, quite a few people have tried to persuade Fu Yunxiu, but no matter what they said, they always looked regretful after seeing his leg. Only Aman seemed unable to see her crippled leg. She bluntly and even somewhat recklessly denied those words and even questioned him in return.
Does he understand him? He doesn't know. All he knows is that when those people start to criticize him, it's as if they're all masters.
Seeing Aman so firmly admit her feelings, a ray of light suddenly shone into the dark corner of his heart, so dazzling that Fu Yunxiu dared not look directly at it and could only lower his head to escape.
But when his gaze fell on those two legs that looked normal on the surface but were actually ugly with bulging veins from sitting for so long, the person who had been hiding in the shell for so long suddenly shrank back.
Even if he is unwilling, a useless person is a useless person. He doesn't have many years left to live. What kind of trouble can he cause?
Fu Yunxiu sneered and raised his head, meeting Aman's clear eyes. He said with a hint of sarcasm, "Whether you understand or not, the matter is settled. There is no need for you to try to please me in order to stay. I don't need any concubines or to carry on the family line. So, for me, your staying here is nothing but a burden."
Fu Yunxiu's eyes were cold, and his words were even more hurtful. The word "burden" was especially damaging to Aman.
From her earliest memories, some people in the village would say that she was a burden to her grandmother, and that her grandmother would have an easier life without her. She would cry and go to her grandmother to complain. At such times, her grandmother would always go and argue with those people, then hug her, stroke her head, and gently say, "Our Aman is not a burden to my grandmother, Aman is my treasure."
Later, as she grew older and more sensible, she stopped paying attention to such remarks. She didn't want her elderly grandmother to argue with others and be verbally abused for her sake.
But ignoring it doesn't mean not caring. The word "burden" ultimately became an unspeakable wound buried deep in Aman's heart. During the three years that her grandmother was sick, Aman watched her suffer so much and sometimes thought that perhaps she really was a burden, otherwise her grandmother wouldn't have to work so hard and wouldn't have fallen ill from exhaustion.
But now, Fu Yunxiu has torn this wound open again, revealing the truth that it was already festering and oozing pus, and the pain has only increased.
In the past, Aman would have pretended not to care or hear, but for some reason, she suddenly wanted to defend herself.
“I am not a burden,” Aman said loudly and righteously. “Young master, no matter what you say, I will not leave. I will prove to you that I will only be an asset to you, not a burden.”
The last two words were almost uttered by Aman through tears.
Fu Yunxiu didn't understand what he had said wrong that caused Aman to react so strongly, but even now, she still refused to leave, which gave Fu Yunxiu a huge headache.
Finally, he could only sneer, "Fine, I'll wait and see, but if you can't do it, then please leave now."
In the end, Fu Yunxiu failed to drive Aman away as he wished, but a war between the two was about to break out.
The steamed bun was sandwiched in the middle, looking at this and that, not understanding how things had come to this.
Breakfast ended unhappily, and Fu Yunxiu and Aman went back to their respective rooms.
Inside the room, Aman leaned against the headboard, all her grievances bursting forth in an instant, and tears streamed down her face.
She wasn't shamelessly refusing to leave Wutongyuan; she genuinely had nowhere else to go. The old woman was gone, the village house had been used to pay off debts, and she was now penniless. Being a complete stranger in Yongzhou, leaving meant certain death.
She understood the young master's position. She was forced upon him by the madam without his consent, and judging from yesterday's events, the madam didn't really care much about her eldest son. So, it was possible that she had other motives for suddenly giving him someone. It was normal for the young master to dislike her.
Even after figuring all this out, Aman still felt very sad.
Why her of all? Why is it so hard to live?
*
In the upper right room, Fu Yunxiu's mood was also quite unsettled.
Despite holding this book, he didn't read a single word since entering the room.
His gaze unconsciously drifted to the soft couch by the window, and the scene he saw when he woke up late last night came to mind.
The moonlight streamed through the window and fell precisely on the soft couch. The bright moonlight was like water, and the person on the couch curled up into a small ball, as docile as a harmless cat.
In fact, ever since he could remember, he had almost never slept in the same room with anyone.
When he was little, his mother was always busy, so she left him with a wet nurse to raise. The wet nurse was a very kind person and treated him like her own son. But he knew very well that he was not his mother. Later, when his younger brother was born, his mother seemed to suddenly become less busy and had all day long to take care of him, feeding him, changing his diapers, and taking care of him meticulously, never asking anyone else to do it for her.
He was five years old then. Out of spite, he said he no longer needed his wet nurse to sleep with him, and that was the end of that.
The tricks children use to compete for attention can sometimes be quite childish.
Since the fire at Wutongyuan, he hasn't had a good night's sleep in a long time.
It wasn't just because of his leg ailment, but also because he would dream of that scene that had left him powerless in the middle of the night.
If he were healthier and more agile, perhaps his father wouldn't have died.
But last night, thanks to Aman's witty banter, he actually slept quite well, which was rare for him. Although he woke up several times during the night because he wasn't used to it, he eventually fell into a deep sleep, so much so that he didn't even know that Aman had left early this morning.
Although he was somewhat greedy, it was just greed.
We can't let this ruin a girl's life!
Life at Wutong Garden is predictable and can be seen to end at a glance. If Aman really stays, besides wasting her time, it will also damage her reputation and do her no good whatsoever.
He will die eventually, but she has a long life ahead of her. Why be confined to this small world? If she leaves here, Aman will live a happy and carefree life wherever she goes.
The maggots living in dark corners, having glimpsed the light of day, should die content.
At noon, Fu Yunxiu did not go out to eat the food delivered from the Marquis's residence. Instead, he had steamed buns brought into his room.
With such a clear attitude, how could Aman not sense it? But she didn't show anything, and even chatted with Mantou during the meal.
Children who grow up in pain are often very good at healing themselves.
In fact, Aman never understood why the servants of the Marquis's mansion would be so audacious as to give Fu Yunxiu, who was, such food, no matter what.
Like today's lunch, although there were two dishes, one of them was obviously leftovers that had been reheated, and it still contained no meat at all. I'm afraid even the servants in the Marquis's mansion don't eat such vegetarian food.
"Because the Second Madam is now in charge of managing the household affairs in the Marquis's mansion." Mantou chewed on an unknown vegetable leaf, looking disdainful.
Although Aman had never met anyone from the Marquis's mansion, she had heard of the Second Madam's reputation.
It seems that the young master's leg was crippled because of her poisoning him, but unexpectedly, she is now in charge of the household affairs of the Marquis's mansion.
"But isn't the First Madam still here?" Aman didn't quite understand. In wealthy families, isn't it usually the First Madam who manages everything in the household?
"Although the Second Madam was only a concubine, she was deeply loved by the Master. Later, her brother made great achievements on the battlefield and became a general. The Master was so happy that he took the opportunity to elevate her to the position of equal wife and also handed over the power of the household to her. After the Master passed away, the Second Branch wanted to compete for the position of head of the family, but it was only because of the power of the Second Madam's family that things did not escalate. So now the Second Young Master is temporarily acting as the head of the family and in charge of the Fu family."
This second young master is Fu Changze, the son of the second wife's son. In other words, the entire Fu family is now controlled by the mother and son. If the second young master hadn't been born to the second wife when she was a concubine, and thus had an illegitimate status, the position of head of the family would have been his long ago.
The rambling and confusing hierarchy of legitimate and illegitimate children gave Aman a headache. Suddenly, she remembered Fu Yunxiu's leg injury and asked, "What happened to the young master's leg? Was he poisoned? Isn't anyone going to do anything about it?"
"Manage? At the time, the young master was critically poisoned, and the master was furious and said he would investigate the matter thoroughly. Then it was found that the second wife had poisoned him. But she didn't intend to poison the eldest young master, but the third young master. However, the egg custard meant for the third young master was drunk by the eldest young master. In a fit of anger, the master locked up the second wife, who was still a concubine at the time, saying that he would send her to the authorities and divorce her. The second wife made a scene all night, insisting that she was innocent. She knelt outside the main courtyard all night, and then she lost her child."
Mantou was nine years old at the time and could remember things, so he remembered this incident very vividly. At that time, the entire Fu family was in complete chaos. The eldest son was poisoned and bleeding from all seven orifices, and the second madam's lower body was also covered in bright red blood.
In the end, the master softened his heart, and with the persuasion of the second wife's family, the matter was eventually dropped.
Such behavior is truly astonishing, but what can be done? Everyone in Yongzhou knows that the Marquis of Yong'an is a lecherous and incompetent man. In order to have fun, he even bought a courtyard specifically for his own enjoyment.
He was obsessed with women, and ultimately died for them. I don't know if that counts as retribution.
*
After lunch, Mantou went to help Fu Yunxiu take a nap, while Aman went about her own business.
That morning, she spoke to Fu Yunxiu with great bravado, and she wasn't just saying it out of anger. If she wanted to prove that she wasn't a burden, she had to show her attitude, and the first thing she had to do was overcome the problem of sleeping.
Aman looked around and, to be honest, this house was so much better than the one he lived in in the village. It was just that it had been uninhabited for a long time and lacked human warmth, which was why it felt so eerie.
Aman thought for a moment, then opened all the windows in the house to let the sunlight in. He went to the kitchen to clean out the stove and found two pieces of charcoal that hadn't burned out yet. He put them in the brazier to warm the house.
The old woman said that ghosts are afraid of sunlight and human presence, so she took the initiative and filled the house with human presence, so the ghosts wouldn't dare to come.
Just as Aman was considering whether he should go to a nearby temple to get a talisman for double protection, he suddenly heard someone knocking on the door.
Mantou ran to open the door. Through the window, Aman saw a boy who was about the same age as her enter. He was wearing a light blue scholar's robe and his black hair was half-tied up with a jade crown. His face seemed somewhat familiar, as if she had seen him somewhere before.
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