Chapter 68 Weddings and funerals share the same sky amidst wind and snow; joys and sorrows each leave their own mark. ...
In contrast to the mournful white mourning and gloomy atmosphere at the Feng residence, the Lan residence was filled with the sounds of gongs and drums, and red silks were hung high, creating a joyous scene.
The world is in chaos, one act ends and another begins; it seems that people are as carefree as those in heaven, and their joys and sorrows are certainly not the same.
Su Jinxiu led Qingluan and Qingyi, stepping through the crimson firecracker debris scattered on the ground, into the Lan residence. Led by a maid, they passed through the hanging flower gate and arrived at Lan Shexiang's boudoir.
Lan Shexiang was being teased and joked about by the nannies and maids. She was already wearing a wedding robe embroidered by Su Jinxiu, adorned with pearls and jade, but her head was not yet covered by the bright red veil. Her makeup was exquisite, and her eyes and brows were flushed with the shyness of a bride-to-be. She was truly radiant.
Upon seeing Su Jinxiu, she immediately panicked and quickly stood up to greet her: "Qiaoniang is here."
Su Jinxiu was genuinely happy for her and smiled faintly. But she didn't know that her own haggard appearance made the smile look worse than tears, truly heartbreaking.
"Qiao Niang," Lan Shexiang's eyes reddened, her voice tinged with guilt and unease, "it's my fault. I couldn't persuade Father to postpone the wedding, and I've disturbed you..."
Su Jinxiu held her hand and said softly, "Silly Shexiang, what nonsense are you talking about? It's your big day, so just do it. Don't let anything else stop you from living your life. I'm truly happy for you."
She paused, then added, "If Achin were still here, he would definitely be happy for you."
Lan Shexiang nodded with tears welling up in her eyes, almost spilling them. Su Jinxiu quickly took out a handkerchief to wipe away the moisture from the corners of her eyes and said with a smile, "Oh, don't cry, don't cry. If you cry, you'll ruin this carefully applied makeup, and the nannies will have to redo it. Look, once you put on this phoenix coronet and wedding gown, you'll be the most beautiful bride in the world."
After saying that, Su Jinxiu pushed Lan Shexiang towards the nanny, telling her to go and do her work.
After Lan Shexiang sat down in front of the dressing table, Su Jinxiu felt her left hand being gently tugged. She looked down and saw Qingyi looking up at her with a childlike face, asking, "Auntie, who is Aqin?"
She crouched down, gazing into Qingyi's clear, stream-like eyes, pondering how to explain this heavy topic.
“Achin, it is…”
Before she could finish speaking, her voice choked up and drifted off into a sob.
She lowered her head and paused for a moment before raising her head to take a breath. She forced a gentle smile and said, "Aqin... is your father's younger brother. Xiao Qingyi should call him... Uncle."
Qingyi's heart skipped a beat, and he immediately realized that the name of his uncle was the one his father had repeatedly warned him not to mention these past few days. Mentioning it would only upset his aunt and grandparents. He immediately realized he had said the wrong thing and didn't know how to make amends. He could only lower his eyes, his little face full of regret and helplessness.
Although Qingluan was young, she was more perceptive and clever than Qingyi. Seeing the awkward atmosphere, she quickly reached out her little hand to tug at Su Jinxiu's sleeve, tilted her head up, and said softly, "Auntie, Auntie, this courtyard is so beautiful! Shall we go see somewhere else?"
Su Jinxiu felt a warmth in her heart, and the sadness that had just been stirred up was somewhat dispelled by the child's innocent words. She smiled and said, "Okay."
So she took her two children for a stroll around the Lan residence. The mansion was decorated with lanterns and colorful streamers, and red silk ribbons hung high, creating a festive atmosphere. Along the way, they encountered many busy servants, who smiled and slipped wedding candies into the children's hands.
Tired from walking, the adult took the two children and sat down in the pavilion.
Su Jinxiu slowly peeled the wrappers off the wedding candies, her fingers deftly feeding one to Qingyi first, and then one to Qingluan.
Looking at the two children's chubby little mouths and satisfied expressions, I couldn't help but tease them, "Your father entrusted you to me for quite some time now, but I haven't seen a single penny of your wages yet."
Qingyi tilted her head, her brows furrowed slightly, as if she were seriously calculating. After a moment, she said in a serious tone, "Auntie, I'll give you all the New Year's money I've saved when I get back."
Su Jinxiu was amused by his mature demeanor and reached out to ruffle his soft hair: "Auntie was just teasing you. Keep this money for yourself to buy things. I'm happy to be able to spend time with you."
That's absolutely true. If it weren't for those two children chattering around her, adding a bit of life to her life, she probably would have stayed curled up in bed every day, like the melancholy and sickly Daiyu, dying from exhaustion of tears.
As for Yi Ruxu, who was also an old friend from Xiuxiang and came to Helan Shexiang for the wedding, she should have gone directly to the groom's house to wait for the auspicious time, as is customary.
During this period, he was exhausted from handling official documents entrusted to him by his uncle, confined within the thorny courtyard of the Hanlin Academy, feeling as if he were in shackles. Although his official rank had risen three levels in succession and his career was soaring, he had not seen the person he longed for for a long time, and his longing for him grew stronger each day.
Having finally escaped the palace today, he was thinking of Su Jinxiu and knew she must be here, so he decided to be impulsive and went straight to her residence to offer his congratulations.
Upon entering the mansion, he eagerly searched among the guests and the sea of red silk. Finally, hidden among the flowers and trees, he caught a glimpse of a familiar, graceful figure in the distant pavilion, with two young children nestled beside her.
As he approached, he heard the girl on his right, with a piece of wedding candy in her mouth, ask indistinctly, "That bride is so beautiful! Is this the wedding? Auntie, when are you getting married? I also want to see how beautiful you are, Auntie."
Yi Ruxu abruptly stopped in her tracks.
He stood there, neither too close nor too far, watching her back, as if he could feel her emotions. Her gradually stiffening back betrayed all her sorrow.
"My aunt won't get married."
Then, he saw Su Jinxiu gently pat the girl's head, her voice soft: "Auntie can wait for Qingluan to grow up, and then Auntie will embroider an even more exquisite wedding dress for you, okay?"
"Okay!" Qingluan was just a child and didn't understand the deeper meaning behind those words, so she happily agreed.
"Qiao Niang!"
A voice called from behind her. Su Jinxiu turned around and saw Yi Ruxu, whom she hadn't seen for many days. A hint of surprise flashed in her eyes, and then she smiled and said, "Brother Ruxu."
At this moment, Qingyi and Qingluan were chasing and playing in the courtyard. Su Jinxiu gently reminded them not to climb the artificial hill while she sat down at the stone table with Yi Ruxu.
"What have you been up to these past few days, Ruxu?"
Yi Ruxu felt a warm glow in his heart upon hearing her question. Even a simple greeting was enough to fill him with sweetness. He explained in detail: "A few days ago, my uncle entrusted me with the important task of compiling the national history. The documents were numerous, urgent, and extremely difficult. As a result, I was stuck in the Hanlin Academy for quite some time. Fortunately, I completed everything the day before yesterday. The Emperor was overjoyed and promoted me three ranks, so I am now a Reader-in-Waiting in the Hanlin Academy."
Su Jinxiu was genuinely happy for him and praised, "Brother Ruxu is indeed amazing! Just as your uncle said, he is no ordinary person."
Yi Ruxu smiled helplessly, a trace of melancholy flashing in his eyes. What he was so eager to pursue was not fame and fortune.
All he sought was to turn his heart toward the bright moon, but alas, the bright moon shone only on the ditch.
During their casual conversation, Lan Shexiang's wedding procession was about to leave the mansion.
In an instant, firecrackers went off and cannons boomed. Maids and servants held colorful paper tubes and threw colorful paper scraps into the air, a custom called "scattering grains and beans" to ward off evil spirits.
The bride, dressed in a bright red wedding gown and with a red veil covering her head, is carried out of her room by her brother. She steps over a fire basin and over a saddle, symbolizing a prosperous and peaceful life.
Attracted by the spectacle, Qingyi and Qingluan turned back to Su Jinxiu and said, "Auntie, let's go take a look," before curiously moving forward.
As soon as the children left, Su Jinxiu felt the air around her instantly turn cold and desolate, as if the previous hustle and bustle had been a fleeting dream.
Seeing that her eyes were unfocused and she was starting to drift off, Yi Ruxu was afraid that she would once again dwell on the pain of the past, so he quickly found some unimportant small talk to change the subject.
But as they talked, the topic inevitably circled back to Wen Shiqin. Yi Ruxu thought that it was better to get rid of the poison than to avoid it, so she simply said, "Qiaoniang, don't be sad anymore. Please accept my condolences. The dead cannot be brought back to life."
"Please accept my condolences...?" Su Jinxiu murmured, repeating the two words, her voice filled with endless self-blame and sorrow: "But he did it for me."
"If it weren't for me..."
Her brows furrowed, lost in deep thought, as if imagining how peaceful and idyllic their life would be if he hadn't gone.
Seeing her emotions becoming increasingly erratic, Yi Ruxu quickly reached out and gently placed her hands on her shoulders, shaking her slightly in an attempt to pull her consciousness back from her memories: "Qiaoniang, this is not your fault. Life is unpredictable, and everything is predestined. Don't blame yourself for this anymore. If he knows from beyond the grave, he would surely want to see you living a good life, wouldn't he? He has sacrificed so much for you, and all he wanted was for you to be healthy and happy. You should live well and not let his good intentions go to waste."
Su Jinxiu gradually regained consciousness and looked blankly at Yi Ruxu, who was looking at her with concern.
When she heard the words "we cannot let him down," a glimmer of clarity flashed in her eyes, and then she nodded blankly.
The Lan family's daughter's wedding and the Ye family's bride's marriage were grand events in the city, drawing firecrackers to be set off continuously along the Imperial Street for days, with lanterns and decorations everywhere, creating a joyous atmosphere.
On the day Lan Shexiang returned to her parents' home, Su Jinxiu also went to offer her congratulations. After the event, she took the children back to Shushi Residence for a short rest, and then moved to Yi Ruxu's Zhenliu Residence.
She asked Yi Ruxu to teach the children to recite a few simple introductory poems, while she watched quietly from the side. Afterwards, the two discussed Fengxun's upcoming long stay in Bianjing, deliberating on which school the two children should attend and who their teachers should be.
Life went on like this, seemingly gradually settling into a peaceful and stable state, without any more waves.
On this day when she had some free time, Su Jinxiu sat alone at the end of the long corridor of Crane Cry Pavilion, watching the snowflakes flutter and fall like cotton wool.
She wasn't thinking about anything; she was just letting her mind wander.
I didn't bring a heater when I went out, and after sitting for a long time, my hands and feet were already freezing cold. Yet I still sat there from the first light of dawn until dusk, my white clothes almost blending into the snowy landscape.
When Feng Xun returned to the mansion and entered the Crane Cry Pavilion, he saw Su Jinxiu in this state and was immediately filled with anger.
He only took the two children out of the mansion for a day, and she already belittled herself and abused her body like this.
The current head of the Feng family, who was usually dignified and composed, could not hide his anger at this moment. He strode forward and said coldly, "Get up. The Feng family does not need an ice sculpture like you."
Su Jinxiu snapped out of her daze, turned around and saw Feng Xun. She quickly stood up to greet him, but her legs went numb from sitting for so long that she swayed and was about to fall. Feng Xun quickly caught her and pulled her back, then swiftly withdrew his hand.
"Thank you, brother," she whispered.
Feng Xun's life, from childhood, followed a perfect trajectory, without a single mistake, making him a model for the world. He entered a private school at the age of five, and at ten, he was selected as a child prodigy to enter the palace and accompany the princes. Later, he gained the appreciation of the Grand Tutor, and at sixteen, he was exceptionally recommended, skipping the imperial examination, and directly appointed as the Registrar of Dengzhou. Later, he was sent to Chengdu Prefecture as the Prefect, where he achieved outstanding political achievements and was deeply loved by the people.
Those who came and went around him were all people who were upright and ambitious, with lofty aspirations and a positive outlook.
I have never seen such an outrageous, self-destructive, and suicidal person.
A few days ago, during the funeral, according to custom, she should have opened the coffin to inspect it, but she fainted from crying in the mourning hall and didn't even have the courage to touch the coffin, so she had to skip this step.
Feng Xun couldn't help but wonder what use this adopted daughter was. She only knew how to surround herself with a dejected air all day long. He didn't want her to perish in the Feng family and taint his family's land, so he had his two children accompany her.
Seeing that she still had a sense of responsibility towards the children and could take care of them patiently, Fengxun felt that she was not completely useless. He instructed the two children to stay by her side at all times, to find interesting things to make her happy, and not to say anything that would upset her.
But today, she has become like this again.
"Walk."
Su Jinxiu looked up and saw that he had already turned and left. She quickly supported her numb hands and feet and ran after him in an awkward manner, asking, "Brother, where are you going?"
Feng Xun spoke softly, his voice devoid of emotion.
"Let's take Qingluan and Qingyi to sweep Siyuan's grave."
"The wind and snow have been too severe these past few days. Brush the snow off his tombstone so that his name is not obscured."
Author's Note: The next chapter won't be too angsty. [heart emoji]
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com