Chapter 97
Every day, Shi Mingyue's figure would appear at the door on time.
She still got up early in the morning, but she didn't sleep with Yun Zhan.
When she brought the food tray in from the kitchen in the morning, her clothes were still damp with the chill of the outside air. She put the food down gently and rarely spoke, usually just saying "Eat it while it's hot" before turning around, locking the door, and leaving.
Occasionally, when she returned home late, she would sit with Yun Zhan for a while. The two would eat at a small table apart, with only the light clinking of bowls and chopsticks. Shi Mingyue never brought up the past or asked Yun Zhan about her thoughts. She would just silently watch her finish her meal before getting up and leaving.
On the evening of the third day, Shi Mingyue, who had nothing to do for the first time, brought in a food tray. Instead of leaving as usual, she pulled out the chair opposite Yun Zhan and slowly sat down.
Yun Zhan paused, his hand holding the chopsticks pausing, and he glanced at Shi Mingyue out of the corner of his eye.
Today, Shi Mingyue was less guarded, and her eyes were less cold than usual. She simply lowered her eyes and quietly picked at the vegetables in her bowl.
Yun Zhan's gaze kept falling on her face. He wanted to speak but was afraid of offending her. He poked at the rice in his bowl with his chopsticks but didn't eat much.
A moment later, Shi Mingyue looked up and happened to meet her gaze. Her brows furrowed slightly, and her tone carried a hint of helplessness that was barely perceptible.
"Eat your food properly, it's getting cold."
Yun Zhan tightened his grip on his chopsticks, finally mustering his courage, and asked timidly, "Can I explain what happened before?"
Shi Mingyue paused in her act of picking up food, her fingertips lightly rubbing the edge of the porcelain spoon. After a few seconds of silence, she sighed softly.
The breath was light, yet it seemed as if something heavy had been lifted from the chest.
She looked up at Yun Zhan, her eyes no longer cold as before, but filled with a weary honesty: "Actually, now, I no longer care about the truth of the matter."
Her gaze fell on Yun Zhan's face: "Whether you did it intentionally or unintentionally, you have left me."
When she said the word "leave," her voice paused almost imperceptibly, as if she were calming her turbulent emotions, before continuing.
"So now I feel that nothing else matters, as long as you are by my side, that's enough."
As she finished speaking, the setting sun shone obliquely through the window, landing on Shi Mingyue's hair and casting a warm glow on her pale cheeks.
The madness in Shi Mingyue's eyes when she looked at Yun Zhan was gone, replaced by an almost humble obsession, as if all the past grievances and pains could be temporarily set aside as long as she could keep him by her side.
Upon hearing Shi Mingyue's words, Yun Zhan felt as if something was blocking his throat. He remained silent for a few seconds before continuing to speak, his voice even softer than before, carrying a hint of urgent earnestness.
"But I don't want you to be unhappy... I know you still hate me."
After she finished speaking, she lowered her eyes, her long eyelashes casting a small shadow under her eyes.
She understood this principle better than anyone: the one who tied the knot must untie it.
The Shi Mingyue of the past always had light in her eyes and was always gentle. She would unconsciously curl the corners of her mouth when she spoke. Unlike now, she is wrapped in coldness, and even her smile is distant.
It was her, it was her lack of resolve back then, that turned Shi Mingyue into what she is today.
Thinking of this, Yun Zhan's eyes turned ashen, and a wave of self-reproach surged up in her heart, making it almost impossible for her to breathe.
The hand gripping the chopsticks tightened unconsciously, the knuckles turning a faint white.
Yun Zhan sighed. She knew she had no right to be angry. Thinking of Shi Mingyue's stubbornness, she slowly loosened her grip, her fingertips trembling slightly, filled with helplessness.
She couldn't even find a way to truly make Shi Mingyue happy.
Shi Mingyue saw through her little actions clearly. Her gaze fell on her repeatedly clenched and unclenched hands, and her heart felt as if it had been gently stung, a subtle pain rising within her.
She never truly intended to hurt Yun Zhan. Even when she was abandoned, filled with resentment and despair, those emotions eventually transformed into a fear of loss.
Shi Mingyue lowered her eyes, gently stirred the rice in her bowl with her chopsticks, and said in a softer voice, "You don't need to worry about these things. Just being by my side is enough."
She paused, then looked up at Yun Zhan, her eyes filled with a hint of sadness: "As long as you don't think about anything else and don't leave me again, I won't be sad."
When Mingyue put down her chopsticks, there was still a little bit of food left in her bowl. Her gaze unconsciously swept towards the chains by the bed.
Yun Zhan watched her movements, pursed his lips, and was about to say something, but swallowed the words back.
She knew what Shi Mingyue was going to do next...
Sure enough, after finishing her meal, Shi Mingyue didn't go straight to the door, but instead went around to the bedside, bent down, and picked up the chain on the ground.
She gently rubbed her fingers on the metal buckle twice, then tightened it slightly to make sure the chain wouldn't loosen easily before getting up.
She performed the action skillfully and naturally, yet it stirred a pang of sadness in Yun Zhan's heart.
Yun Zhan lowered her eyes, looking at her empty wrist... She was still worried about me, afraid that I would leave quietly like last time.
This realization was like a fine needle, gently pricking her heart, leaving her feeling both helpless and heartbroken.
Shi Mingyue straightened the chains, turned and walked towards the door. She paused, but didn't look back. Her voice was lower than before: "I'm sorry, please bear with me for now..."
She paused for a few seconds, as if she were carefully choosing her words, or perhaps making excuses for herself.
"I don't know when I'll be able to untie you..."
Maybe soon... or maybe never.
She didn't want to experience that feeling of gain and loss again.
As soon as she finished speaking, she didn't linger. She pushed open the door and walked out. With a "click," the door lock closed again, leaving Yun Zhan alone in the room.
The aroma of food still lingered in the air, but Yun Zhan had lost her appetite. She stared at the doorway, her fingers unconsciously curling up, her mind blank.
Yun Zhan didn't know how long this would last, nor did he know what method he could use to untangle the knot in Shi Mingyue's heart.
...
The days seemed to be slowed down, and Yun Zhan spent several days in his room, utterly bored.
During the day, she would take out a few old books from the bookshelf, sit on the soft couch by the window and read them. Sunlight would filter through the curtains and fall on the pages, giving even the words a touch of warmth.
Occasionally, I would stand by the wall, gazing at the calligraphy and paintings collected by Shi Mingyue, my fingertips lightly brushing the edge of the frame, yet I always felt that this leisurely atmosphere concealed an inescapable sense of oppression.
Only at night, when Shi Mingyue returned to have dinner with her, would the room feel more lively. However, the two still didn't talk much, and most of the time they would just quietly share a dinner. Afterward, Shi Mingyue would leave, leaving her alone in the empty room.
"So boring... I can't go out either. Shi Mingyue took my phone, so I can't contact her."
Yun Zhan paced anxiously back and forth in the room, scratching his head, but still couldn't find a solution.
"Time can solve everything. Maybe... things will get better in a while."
21 added, "She loves you very much and can't bear to hurt you; the whole chain is wrapped in wool."
"But time can only heal all wounds... it can't mend the void in her heart..."
That night, the moonlight outside the window was exceptionally cold. Yun Zhan had just finished washing up and was lying in bed when he heard the sound of a key turning outside the door.
The door creaked open, and Shi Mingyue walked in, carrying a faint smell of alcohol, which, mixed with the coolness of the night breeze, instantly broke the tranquility of the room.
Instead of washing up as usual, she went straight to the bedside and stopped.
Yun Zhan looked up and saw that Shi Mingyue's eyes were much darker than usual, and her usual calmness and restraint seemed to have been diluted by alcohol.
A barely concealed longing surged deep within her eyes, along with an unyielding stubbornness that had never faded, burning like a flame in the dark night, scorching Yun Zhan.
She stood there by the bed, her body swaying slightly, the smell of alcohol dissipating gently with her breath.
Without saying a word, he simply stared at Yun Zhan on the bed, his gaze sliding from her eyebrows and eyes to her neck, and then to her hand resting on the blanket. The emotions in his eyes were complex and hard to discern, containing longing, possessiveness, and a hint of vulnerability that he dared not reveal after drinking, making the air in the entire room tense.
When Yun Zhan saw Shi Mingyue standing by the bed, reeking of alcohol and with a vulnerability rarely seen in her eyes, his heart jumped.
She quickly propped herself up and said with concern, "Why did you drink so much... Wait a moment, I'll get you a glass of water."
Before she finished speaking, she had already thrown off the covers and gotten out of bed. The chains on her legs swayed gently with her movements, and the "clinking" of the metal was particularly clear in the quiet night, like an invisible reminder between the two of them.
But Yun Zhan didn't care about any of that. He had just taken a step when Shi Mingyue suddenly grabbed his wrist.
The force was astonishing; his knuckles almost dug into her flesh.
Yun Zhan turned around and met Shi Mingyue's bloodshot eyes.
Before she knew it, her eyes were red and swollen, the darkness in them replaced by surging emotions—unease, fear, and a desperate plea on the verge of collapse.
“Yun Zhan…”
Shi Mingyue's voice was hoarse from drinking and trembled slightly: "Tell me, are you going to leave again..."
She gripped Yun Zhan's hand tighter, her breathing quickened, and her chest heaved violently, clearly indicating that she had completely lost control of her emotions: "My friends all tell me that if I leave once, I'll leave a second time, a third time..."
At this point, her voice choked, and tears welled up in her eyes, but she stared intently at Yun Zhan, refusing to look away. "Say something. Do you still want to leave?"
"Will there be some other shady characters trying to lure you... or make you want to complete those damn tasks...?"
"Do you know how heartbroken I was after you left? I almost died..."
The smell of alcohol mixed with her rapid breathing sprayed onto Yun Zhan's face, carrying a scorching heat.
Shi Mingyue held her hand tightly, as if grasping at the last straw, refusing to let go even slightly, afraid that if she let go, the person in front of her would disappear into the night again and never be found again.
The air in the room froze instantly, with only the rapid breathing of the two people and the occasional soft rattling of the chains, creating a stifling silence.
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