Chapter 71: The First Letter Home
Gu Yangui has been away from the capital for more than half a month.
The days in the Duke's mansion seemed to stretch out, yet also seemed to pass quietly in a routine. Su Wanrou's life became unusually regular: she would get up in the morning, first go to pay her respects to the old lady, and have breakfast with her; then she would handle the household affairs, listening to Gu Zhong and the other stewardesses' reports; after noon, she would supervise Mingxuan's studies or play with him for a while; in the evening, she would mostly sit alone under the lamp, either looking at account books or doing needlework, until late at night.
Seeing that despite her young age, she was becoming increasingly composed and prudent in her actions, the subtle unease that had arisen since the Duke's departure gradually subsided. Everyone remarked that the Madam was indeed someone the Duke valued; though young, she possessed the demeanor of a mistress of the house.
Only Su Wanrou herself knew what turbulent undercurrents lay beneath that deliberately maintained calm. It was a deep longing for the war-torn borderlands thousands of miles away, a longing that gnawed at her heart and soul, yet she had nowhere to express it.
That afternoon, a light drizzle began to fall outside the window, pattering against the banana leaves with a soft, rustling sound. Su Wanrou had just finished checking Mingxuan's calligraphy and was holding a nightgown she was sewing for Gu Yangui, carefully stitching the edges by the windowlight. The soft white cotton fabric was warm to the touch, making her feel, in a daze, as if she could still feel his body temperature.
“Mother,” Mingxuan said, lying on the nearby table, fiddling with the nine-linked rings, his little face a little sullen, “when will Father come back? He hasn’t tested me on riding the pony in the training ground for so long.”
Su Wanrou paused slightly while sewing, the needle almost pricking her finger. She put down the needle and thread, pulled her son to her side, and said softly, "Father has gone to fight the bad guys. He'll be back when he's done. Xuan'er, be a good boy and study hard. When Father comes back, he'll see how much you've improved, and he'll be very happy."
"Yes!" Mingxuan nodded vigorously, but his big eyes were still filled with disappointment. "But... I miss my father."
A simple sentence brought tears to Su Wanrou's eyes. How could she not miss him? Her longing, like the gentle rain, seeped into every crevice, soaking her heart. She gently patted her son's back, but her gaze involuntarily drifted to the gray sky outside the window.
The northern border is bitterly cold; it must be late autumn by now. I wonder if he has enough winter clothes? How is the fighting at the border? Is he... alright?
Since receiving his brief, urgent letter that day, not a single word had come. She knew the military situation was urgent, the journey was long, and correspondence was inconvenient, but the wait was truly unbearable. Every time the sound of horses' hooves rang out outside the manor gate, her heart would instinctively clench, hoping it was a messenger from afar, yet fearing to hear any bad news.
"Madam! Madam!" A slightly hurried voice came from outside the door, breaking the silence in the room.
Su Wanrou's heart skipped a beat, a strange premonition washing over her. She steadied herself and called out, "What is it?"
Yunbin lifted the curtain and entered, her face beaming with undisguised joy. In her hands she held a long, narrow wooden box wrapped tightly in oilcloth: "Madam, it's from the border! A letter has arrived from the border! It's a letter from home sent back by the Duke!"
With a "clatter," the needle and thread in Su Wanrou's hand fell to the ground. She stood up abruptly, not caring about her loss of composure, and rushed forward, almost snatching the wooden box from her. The wooden box felt slightly heavy in her hand, carrying the coolness of a journey, and the lid was still covered with a few undried water droplets.
"Where is the messenger?" Her voice was a little tense.
"They've already arranged for you to rest and have a meal. It was General Zhao, the captain of the Duke's personal guard, who personally brought it back. He said the Duke instructed that it must be handed to you personally, Madam," Yunbin quickly replied.
Su Wanrou nodded, hugging the wooden box tightly, and said to Mingxuan, who was looking over with wide, curious eyes, "Xuan'er, go and have some snacks with Granny first. Mother... Mother has something to do."
Mingxuan obediently agreed and was led away by his wet nurse, looking back every few steps.
Silence returned to the room, broken only by the sound of rain pattering on the banana leaves. Su Wanrou walked to the couch by the window and sat down, placing the wooden box on the small table. She took several deep breaths to calm her wildly beating heart. With her slightly trembling hand, she carefully untied the ropes binding her, lifted the oilcloth, and revealed an ordinary camphor wood box inside.
Upon opening the box, the first thing that catches the eye is a thick letter, bearing Gu Yangui's familiar yet sharp handwriting: "To my wife, Wanrou." Beside the letter lies a smaller brocade pouch, its contents unknown.
Her fingertips gently traced the words "My Wife," and an indescribable feeling of bittersweetness welled up in her heart. She first picked up the brocade pouch, untied the string, and poured its contents into her palm.
It turned out to be a few dried and slightly damaged petals. The petals were a pale purple, with a unique shape, a variety never seen before in the capital. Although they had lost their moisture, they still retained a faint, cool fragrance with a wild, grassy scent.
He... would actually pick wildflowers for her during a march?
This realization instantly melted Su Wanrou's heart. She imagined that burly man in black armor, who struck fear into the hearts of his enemies on the battlefield, taking a moment of rest to bend down and pluck these unassuming wildflowers, carefully tucking them into a book, and then sending them back to her across mountains and rivers. This clumsy yet sincere gesture was more touching than any sweet words.
She carefully placed the petals back into the brocade pouch, tucked it close to her body as if it were some rare treasure. Then, she solemnly picked up the thick letter and carefully cut open the envelope with a paper cutter.
The letter was a thick stack of paper, and when unfolded, it was densely covered with writing. This was quite different from his usual concise style.
"Wanrou, my wife, sees the words as if they were her face:
As I write this, the army has already arrived at Shuofang City, a major town in the northern border. The march has been smooth, and the soldiers have fought bravely. Do not worry.
The scenery in the north is quite different from that in the capital. The sky is high and the fields are wide, and the autumn wind already carries a chill. I saw some purple bellflowers by the post road. Although they are small, they are cold-resistant and proud of the frost, blooming tenaciously in the wind and sand. Thinking of my wife's gentle yet strong nature, I picked a few petals and enclosed them with this letter, hoping to amuse you.
This expedition, though fulfilling my duty, fills me with a deep sense of indebtedness whenever I think of the moment we part, standing at the pavilion with Xuan'er. As a military general, defending the land is my responsibility, yet I have burdened you with the responsibility of this family business at such a young age, caring for your grandmother and raising your young child to adulthood. Though I haven't witnessed it firsthand, I can attest to the hardships you have endured. These thoughts keep me awake at night.
Military affairs are numerous and complex; battle formations and the allocation of provisions all require my personal attention. Yet, in the stillness of the night, amidst the sounds of the watchtowers outside the tent, I cannot help but think of your gentle silhouette under the lamplight in Guiren Residence, the faint scent of jasmine emanating from you, and the playful antics of Xuan'er around my knees. In the capital, the osmanthus blossoms should have already faded, and the weather is turning cool. You have always been frail; remember to add layers and avoid getting chilled. Xuan'er's studies should not be neglected too much, but a child's nature also requires appropriate leniency; a balance between work and rest is essential.
You may handle all matters in the household as you see fit; there is no need to report back on everything. Gu Zhong and the others are elders in the household and can be trusted. If there are any difficult decisions, you can also discuss them with your grandmother. Although you are young, you are intelligent and sensible, and I believe you can manage the household well.
Although there have been occasional skirmishes at the border, the overall situation remains under control, so there is no need to worry excessively. I will certainly fulfill my duties diligently, clear the borders as soon as possible, and return in triumph. At that time, I will no longer fail you.
Words cannot express my feelings, though this letter is short. I hope you take good care of yourself and wait for my return home.
Husband's handwritten letter upon returning from banquet
On a certain day of a certain month of a certain year, at the Shuofang military tent.
Su Wanrou read the letter word by word, afraid of missing any detail. The first half of the letter was still written by the steady and reliable Duke, detailing his itinerary and describing the scenery. But as she read the middle part, the words filled with guilt and concern quickly brought tears to her eyes. He understood her hardships and cherished her strength. And when she saw him say that he thought of her in the quiet of the night, of the warmth of home, reminded her to wear more clothes, and cared about Xuan'er's studies, her tears finally rolled down her cheeks, one by one, falling onto the letter paper and spreading faint ink stains.
He wasn't bad with words; it's just that his deep affection was hidden in these seemingly mundane, trivial reminders and clumsy expressions of romance. This letter home touched her heart and gave her peace of mind more than any vow of eternal love.
She read the letter two or three times before carefully folding it back along the original creases. She held it close to her heart for a while, as if that would bring her closer to him. Then, she got up, washed her face, and redid her makeup to make sure no trace of crying was visible. Only then did she take the letter and head towards the Old Madam's Cihui Garden.
Such letters to reassure the family must be sent to the grandmother as soon as possible, so as not to worry her.
Sure enough, after listening to the contents of the letter read by Su Wanrou (she omitted the private words between husband and wife and only picked out the reassuring words), the old lady's face, which had been clouded with worry for many days, finally dissipated. She twirled her prayer beads and said repeatedly, "Good, good, it's good that you've arrived, it's good that you're safe! May Buddha protect you!"
When Su Wanrou left Cihui Garden, the rain had stopped, and a patch of azure sky appeared on the horizon. She returned to Guiren Residence, immediately spread out letter paper, and prepared ink and brushes.
She had so much to say to him. She wanted to tell him that she had received the flower petals and was overjoyed; she wanted to tell him that everything was well at home, that her grandmother was in good health, and how many more words Xuan'er had learned; she wanted to remind him to wear warm clothes in the cold weather and to be careful in everything he did…
In the end, when she put pen to paper, it transformed into the simplest of words:
"To my beloved husband: I have read your letter and am comforted to know you have arrived safely in the north. I have received the purple bellflower petals; their unique fragrance delights me. Thank you for your concern. Everything is well in the capital; Grandmother is healthy, Xuan'er is making progress, and all matters at home are going smoothly. I hope you will not worry about home. The border is bitterly cold, and the weather is unpredictable. I hope you will take good care of yourself and return victorious soon. Xuan'er and I wait for your return every day at home. This letter is short, but my feelings are deep. Take care. Your wife, Wanrou."
After writing, she blew on the ink to dry the letter and sealed it. After thinking for a moment, she took out a small sachet, put a few dried jasmine flowers and calming spices inside, and placed it in a brocade box along with the reply.
"Yunbin, go and invite General Zhao over."
General Zhao arrived quickly, still looking travel-worn, but he was extremely respectful to Su Wanrou.
"Thank you for your trouble, General Zhao." Su Wanrou handed him the brocade box and said gently, "This is my reply to the Duke and some personal belongings. Please take them back with you, General. The border is tough, so please, General and all the brothers, make sure... make sure you take good care of the Duke."
When she said her last sentence, her voice trembled slightly, carrying a barely perceptible plea.
General Zhao's expression hardened. He solemnly accepted the brocade box, knelt on one knee, and said in a deep voice, "Madam, rest assured! We will protect the Duke with our lives! We will definitely convey your sentiments!"
After seeing General Zhao off, Su Wanrou stood alone under the eaves. The air after the rain was exceptionally fresh, carrying the fragrance of earth and grass. She looked up at the vast northern sky, her heart no longer feeling as empty as it had in the past few days.
That thick letter home, those few dried petals, were like a warm bridge, spanning thousands of miles and tightly connecting two hearts.
"Wait for me to return home."
"Hoping for an early triumphant return."
She knew that the days to come would still be long, but with these letters and this connection that transcended mountains and rivers, her heart found peace.
The words "shared heart" are no longer just a vow; they have transformed into this family letter and a few flower petals, blending into the shimmering light after the drizzle, bringing a sense of peace and warmth.
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