Chapter 311 Strength
When the light of day had completely faded and the inky blue seeped into the window paper, the courtyard was quiet.
Nan Zhiyi was so tired that she didn't even want to move her fingers, so she let Gu Xiao help her get dressed and fix her hair.
Sitting in the jeep on the way back to the army compound, she kept turning her head to look at the blurry tree shadows flashing past the window, refusing to look at him.
Occasionally, when her gaze swept over him, it carried a clear hint of annoyance.
Gu Xiao held the steering wheel with one hand and reached out with the other, wanting to hold her hand.
Nan Zhiyi quickly withdrew her hand and placed it on her knee.
The car was parked in front of the small building in the family compound. Gu Xiao turned off the engine and walked around to open the door for her.
Nan Zhiyi wanted to get out of the car by herself, but he had already bent down, his arms going under her knees and back, to carry her into the house.
"I can walk by myself." Her legs went weak, and her face burned. "What would it look like if Sister Zhang saw this?"
Gu Xiao paused, looking at her flushed cheeks, and leaned close to her ear, "Wife, don't be angry. When we go back to the room later, you can hit me or scold me as you please, okay?"
The breath he blew towards her made Nan Zhiyi's heart skip a beat, and the force with which she was pushing him away loosened.
Gu Xiao took the opportunity to half-embrace her and led her into the house.
In the dead of night, Gu Xiao coaxed Xiao Man to sleep and waited for him to wash up and return to bed.
Nan Zhiyi turned her back to him and wrapped herself tightly in the blanket.
Gu Xiao moved closer, his chest against her back, his arms around her waist.
"My dear wife, don't be angry. It will break my heart if you get sick from it..."
He whispered in her ear, gently coaxing her.
Nan Zhiyi remained silent, but her body relaxed slightly.
Gu Xiao whispered a few more sweet words, his breath tickling her neck.
Nan Zhiyi finally moved, reaching out and placing her hand on his large hand that was wrapped around her waist, her fingertips stroking the back of his hand.
"I'm not angry, I'm just tired."
Hearing her softened tone, Gu Xiao felt relieved and, taking advantage of the situation, asked in a low voice, "Then next time during the day..."
Nan Zhiyi turned around, threw herself at him, and covered his mouth with her hand, "If you say that again, I'll..."
So what about her?
Should we hit him or yell at him? Should we sleep in separate rooms?
She couldn't say those words, and she knew they wouldn't have any deterrent effect on him.
She let go of his hand dejectedly and pressed her burning face against his chest.
Gu Xiao chuckled softly, his chest vibrating, the sound reaching her face.
The laughter was filled with triumphant pleasure, which made her both ashamed and angry. Without thinking, she opened her mouth and bit his chest muscle hard.
Gu Xiao took a breath, then hugged her even tighter, leaned close to her ear, and whispered something even more obscene.
Nan Zhiyi's face flushed red, as if it were on fire. In her shame and anger, she bit him harder.
This time, Gu Xiao didn't say anything, but tightened his arms and gently brushed his chin against her soft hair. Only the sound of their intertwined breathing filled the room.
After a while, his deep voice rang out in the darkness, making Nan Zhiyi's eardrums itch slightly.
"When we were on a mission, sometimes we would lie in a ravine and couldn't move for a whole night. The dew was heavy, and our clothes would stick to our bodies damply. We were so cold that our teeth would chatter."
Nan Zhiyi listened quietly, her cheek pressed against his chest, feeling the steady, powerful beating of his heart.
"Back then, I couldn't think about anything else; I had to keep my eyes on the front and listen for any sounds. But there were always a few moments when all sorts of things would pop into my head. I just thought about you."
"I miss the way you sat by the window writing, I miss the tea you brewed for me, I miss you... glaring at me, just like you did just now. I also miss the scent of you, so intoxicating."
Thinking of you, it feels like the coldness in my heart has been warmed up.
Nan Zhiyi felt a lump in her throat and buried herself in his arms again.
“On one occasion,” Gu Xiao’s voice deepened, “he led a few people forward and stepped on something.”
Nan Zhiyi tensed up, her hand gripping his pajamas unconsciously tightening.
"It's alright," he noticed and patted her back reassuringly. "You reacted quickly and dodged most of it. Your left leg was just scratched by the shards, but it wasn't deep."
He spoke casually, but Nan Zhiyi knew it was far more complex than simply "scratching it."
"I was thrown over by the blast wave and fell to the ground. The dirt and the smell of gunpowder were filling my nose. For a moment, I couldn't hear anything and my vision went black. At that time, I only had one thought in my mind... I can't die here."
His arms tightened, making Nan Zhiyi feel a little pain, but she didn't move.
"I haven't spent enough time with you yet, and I haven't watched Xiaoman grow up."
“I was thinking,” he continued, his voice lower, almost whispering in her ear, “that I can’t die here. I have to come back alive, and I have to… I have to hold my delicate little one in my arms and listen to her whining and throwing tantrums.”
"Who's being delicate..." Nan Zhiyi retorted with a nasal tone, her voice soft and without any strength.
She raised her arms and wrapped them around his neck, her tears soaking his pajamas.
Gu Xiao's warm lips touched her wet eyelashes, tasting a salty and bitter flavor.
"Why are you crying? You came back safe and sound."
Nan Zhiyi shook her head, unable to speak, but hugged him even tighter, as if to confirm his presence.
He sighed and stroked the back of her head with his large hand. "Later, when I was lying in the makeshift treatment center, I couldn't sleep because of the pain, so I looked at the sky. The stars over there looked different from the ones here; they were so bright and dense, they were dazzling."
"I was thinking, are you looking at the stars too? If only we were looking at the same one. Thinking about it made the pain seem less.
Nan Zhiyi sat up and gently stroked his cheek with her fingers, "Gu Xiao...you must never get hurt again."
He took her hand, pressed it to his lips, and gently kissed her fingertips.
"Yes, I promise. So... don't be angry with me. Sometimes I can be a little crazy and can't control myself... I just really want to make sure you're really in my arms."
Even though she knew Gu Xiao was just saying sweet words to coax her, Nan Zhiyi was still happy.
In the dim light, her eyes, washed clean by tears, shone exceptionally bright as she gazed steadily down at Gu Xiao.
"I miss you too. I think about you every day. In the first week after you left, I wrote three letters. Then I wrote more and more, and locked them in the deepest part of the drawer..."
"Silly. Why lock it up? Tomorrow I'll have to read it carefully, word by word, to see what my wife really thinks of me..."
Nan Zhiyi lowered her head and nuzzled his nose against hers. "Then don't think I'm being long-winded."
Never.
He pulled her back into his arms, letting her rest comfortably on his arm.
Neither of them spoke again, they nestled together quietly, listening to each other's breathing and heartbeats.
As the moonlight shifted westward, the shadows of the trees swayed gently on the curtains.
The person in his arms finally drifted off to sleep, but Gu Xiao was not sleepy at all. He looked at her for a long time in the dim light before pulling her closer to him and closing his eyes.
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