Chapter 353 Life and Death
Gu Xiao returned to the capital at two in the morning. As soon as he unlocked the door, Nan Zhiyi rushed into his arms with her familiar fragrance, causing him to take a small step back, his heart softening.
He put one arm around Nan Zhiyi's waist and locked the door with the other.
"Honey, I'm home. Did I wake you up?"
Nan Zhiyi shook her head. "No, I'm a light sleeper. I heard a car outside and thought it might be you, so I came down to check."
She asked eagerly, "How is Dad? Xiao Liu called home this morning and said Dad has been transferred to a regular ward. Is he doing alright?"
During the few days Gu Xiao was away from home, fearing that she would worry, whenever Commander Gu's condition improved even slightly, he would have Xiao Liu call home to inform her. Sometimes Nan Zhiyi would answer, and sometimes Sister Zhang would answer and then relay the message to her.
Gu Xiao used his arm to lift her up a bit, so she could lean against him more comfortably, before answering, "Yes, she's been moved to a regular ward. Dr. Zhao said that the main thing now is to let her absorb the nutrients slowly and do rehabilitation exercises. It can't be rushed, but it's definitely moving in the right direction."
He tried to downplay the situation, not wanting her to worry too much.
Nan Zhiyi whispered against his chest, "That's good... In a few days, when my studies aren't so busy, I'd like to ask for two days off and take Xiaoman back to Jian'an to see Dad."
Gu Xiao smiled, neither agreeing nor disagreeing immediately, but simply hefted the person in his arms: "Alright, get down first. I smell all over you, don't let the stench bother you. Wait until I've showered..."
Before he could finish speaking, Nan Zhiyi tightened her arms and hugged him even tighter, saying, "No! I don't mind you now."
Her worries and longing over the past few days made her especially fond of this embrace.
Gu Xiao chuckled, clearly not believing her sweet talk. He picked her up and carried her towards the stairs, exposing her lie: "You're only sweet-talking now. I bet you'll be urging me to take a shower and change all my pajamas soon."
Nan Zhiyi was hit where it hurt. She lightly punched his shoulder but didn't argue. She just let him carry her upstairs.
Perhaps because of Commander Gu's serious illness, from that day on, Nan Zhiyi paid extra attention to Gu Xiao's health.
Every few days, she would instruct Sister Zhang to stew some nourishing soup, adding special Chinese medicinal herbs to replenish qi and blood. No matter how late Gu Xiao got home, she would always personally serve him a bowl and watch him drink it before she felt at ease.
This soup is nourishing and has "significant" effects.
For several nights in a row, Nan Zhiyi was kept up late by the energetic Gu Xiao, and her eyelids were drooping with sleep.
After they had finished eating, Gu Xiao held her, who was panting, and whispered in her ear, "Do you think I really need those tonic soups?"
Nan Zhiyi punched his shoulder with her fist, saying in embarrassment and annoyance, "I drank too, why didn't I drink like you..."
She was too embarrassed to say what came next, so she buried her burning cheeks in his sweaty neck.
After a long while, she said in a low voice, "We will all grow old... Fifth Brother, I'm so scared... so scared that you will leave me."
She dared not even utter the word that signified permanent separation, as if saying it would bring misfortune.
Gu Xiao understood.
He paused, his hand stroking her bare back, then pulled her closer, saying, "I will always be with you, no matter what..."
Nan Zhiyi quickly pressed her finger against his lips to stop him from saying the next word.
“I know, Fifth Brother, I know. I will always be with you. When we become old men and women, and all our teeth have fallen out, we will sit under the grape trellis in the yard and talk slowly.”
Gu Xiao rubbed his chin against her forehead, "Mmm..."
Life and death were the ultimate questions they could not avoid. He was six years older than her, and this six-year age gap became an unspeakable regret for him.
He always hoped that he could protect her more thoroughly and stay with her for a longer time.
Unfortunately... birth, aging, sickness, and death are inevitable.
The two embraced quietly, their body heat and heartbeats the most real comfort in the cold night.
After a long while, Nan Zhiyi said very softly, "Fifth Brother, I have to go before you... I... I'm really scared, scared that you'll leave me alone."
The dependence and fear in her words touched Gu Xiao's heart.
He made no further promises, but simply tightened his arms around her, giving her a breathtaking hug as a silent response.
A soft rustling sound came from outside the window, like silkworms nibbling on mulberry leaves; upon closer listening, it was the sound of snowflakes scraping against the glass.
Gu Xiao loosened his grip on his arm, listened intently, and whispered, "It's snowing. I'll take you to school tomorrow."
Nan Zhiyi's emotions had calmed down considerably. She pinched his chest a few times with her fingertips and said, "Okay, let's leave early so as not to delay your work."
Gu Xiao lowered his head and kissed her forehead. "Sleep well, my wife."
Nan Zhiyi stirred, reaching for the pajamas scattered to the side, but Gu Xiao tightened his arms around her, nuzzling his chin against hers, "Sleep like this... it's not cold."
Nan Zhiyi was indeed exhausted, so she obediently stopped moving, snuggled back into his warm embrace, and fell into a deep sleep while listening to the increasingly dense sound of snow outside the window.
The next morning, the snow had stopped, and the world was a pristine white.
The jeep rolled over the snow-covered road and stopped at the entrance of Kyoto University.
Gu Xiao leaned over and carefully tucked the thick wool scarf around Nan Zhiyi's neck, then put her gloves on tightly, and instructed, "Have Xiao Liu pick you up this afternoon."
Nan Zhiyi responded and got out of the car.
She stood by the roadside, watching Gu Xiao's car drive away, before turning and walking towards the campus.
The stone lions at the school gate wore white velvet caps, and the vermilion gateposts appeared even more serene against the snow.
A path has been cleared in the middle of the road leading to the teaching building for people to walk on.
But Nan Zhiyi deliberately avoided that clean place.
She deliberately stepped on the fluffy, fresh snow beside the path, listening to the crunching sound under her feet, walking slowly, one step at a time.
The sound reminded her of her childhood, when she would always play in the snow like this whenever it snowed, often getting her boots soaked and being nagged by her mother.
Snowflakes occasionally drifted down from the trees and clung to her scarf, sparkling and translucent. She couldn't resist reaching out to catch them, watching the hexagonal ice crystals melt rapidly on her glove, turning into a few cool water stains.
A new year is approaching.
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