"Really?" Pang Yi suddenly felt relieved and smiled, "I knew you must like red plum blossoms."
"How do you know?" Xiao An asked casually.
"You... your shoes are embroidered with red plum blossoms." Pang Yi said with some difficulty. As soon as he said this, he turned his eyes away and was too embarrassed to look at Xiao An again.
"On the shoes?" Xiao An was startled. She lowered her head and saw butterflies embroidered on the yellow uppers of the shoes. Where are the red plum blossoms? Xiao An looked at Pang Yi in bewilderment.
"No... not this pair." Pang Yi looked embarrassed. A man in his early thirties was more shy than a young boy. He rubbed his hands, avoiding Xiao An's gaze, and then stuttered in a low voice. "It's the pair of Yuan... Yuan pink ones. That night, you fell asleep, and I... I roasted your shoes for you."
Xiao An was startled, then she remembered.
That night, on the endless snowfield, she slept soundly in the tent. It was so cold. Pang Yi had to stay outside all night, and then he fell ill the next day.
"At that time..." Xiao An walked up to Pang Yi. She gently held Pang Yi's hand, and with her bright eyes, she looked tenderly at the overly shy man in front of her. "You fell in love with me, right?"
Pang Yi felt uncomfortable being stared at by Xiao An. He subconsciously looked away, but soon he turned back. He looked into Xiao An's eyes and gradually he felt less awkward. He gently squeezed Xiao An's hand and whispered, "I don't know."
Yes, he doesn't know.
At that time, he only knew that he hated this delicate and frivolous noblewoman from the capital who was always looking for trouble. He was too lazy to pay attention to her, but his eyes always fell on her, looking at her beautiful face, which was either pitiful, or sly and proud, or angry but not able to speak...
He thought this girl was really interesting. Before he was fifteen, he had not yet gone to southern Xinjiang. Before that, the girls from the capital he had met were either cautious or scheming. He had never seen such an interesting girl. He hated Xiao An, but at the same time he was unconsciously attracted to her.
He didn't know if this could be considered love. He only knew that on that quiet and cold night when they stayed overnight in Songjiatun, when he heard her small voice behind him, his heart ached so much.
"After you dropped me off, you... you left?"
"Are you going back to the capital? Or somewhere else?"
"Will you come to Ningguta again in the future?"
"You won't come again, will you? Who would want to come to such a desolate place without a reason? I'm sorry to have caused you trouble along the way, but I won't be able to trouble you for long..."
…
That night, he stood in the snow all night long. His high fever had just subsided and he felt very weak, but he knew he could not go back into that room because if he did, he would never be able to get out.
A man who had lived for thirty years suddenly realized that he was just an ordinary man.
He was ashamed and annoyed.
…
"What about now?" Xiao An looked up at him, "Now, you should know, right?"
Xiao An looked at him without blinking, and so did Pang Yi. Neither of them spoke. In the flickering candlelight, Xiao An stood on tiptoe and pressed her rosy lips on Pang Yi's bearded chin.
It was just a light touch, and Xiao An couldn't leave. Pang Yi suddenly grabbed the back of Xiao An's head, then kissed her trembling lips.
It was called a kiss, but in fact, it was just sticking together. Pang Yi didn't know how to kiss, and neither did Xiao An. The two of them just stuck together like that until Xiao An timidly opened her mouth...
"The first thirty years were really wasted..." After the kiss, Pang Yi hugged Xiao An and sighed.
Xiao An was so embarrassed that she couldn't even raise her head. She leaned in Pang Yi's arms, thinking about what had just happened and her own boldness and initiative. Xiao An became even more shy and her whole face was pressed against Pang Yi's arms.
It was their first kiss and hug, so Pang Yi was inevitably a little excited. He held Xiao An's face and then leaned close to her again. He kissed her clumsily and even bit her a few times. He was a little annoyed, but he couldn't bear to stop. While kissing her, he said embarrassedly, "Hold, I'm sorry, I'm not very good at it... It's the first time, please... Please forgive me..."
"No, it's okay. It's... it's my first time too." After a while, Xiao An said in an inaudible voice.
Pang Yi's whole body stiffened, and the next second, he hugged Xiao An even tighter.
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