Su Mingan looked at Xiao Jingsan who was sitting on the chair.
The young man covered his face, his shoulders shrugged, and he completely lost his usual carelessness. His pain and struggle were cut away in these few short laughs, like a knife scraping flesh and bone.
The peach petals on the ground seemed to be a little moist, curling up limply. Su Mingan looked away and looked at the vast starry sky.
The night sky is so vast, as if it gathers the expectations of all living things. During the Chinese New Year, people used to write blessings on Kongming lanterns and release them, which looked like orange-red sparks. Perhaps they believed that among the countless stars that were invisible to the naked eye, there would be a bright light in their hearts. They didn't know that Kongming lanterns could never become stars, they would only fall.
Su Mingan wondered, during the years he was trapped in the palace, had the eldest prince ever released a Kongming lantern himself? Or was he trapped by the strict palace rules and couldn't even see the Kongming lanterns of the common people?
Did he write down his ideals in his own handwriting? Did he leave his blessings in his own handwriting?
During the days when I was locked up in the tower, did I ever eat Yuanxiao? Did I ever see the lanterns? Or could I only vaguely see the lights of the capital through the small window? Or could I only smell my own blood and see the steam of cooking Yuanxiao floating from the eaves?
He may have dreamed of the palace maids and the white fox many times. Although he could only lie weakly in bed, they could hold his hands in his dreams and take him through the countryside, across the fields, climb very high mountains, jump over very wide rivers, and see the kites in the sky and the chickens and ducks on the ground.
He would not abandon his responsibilities, so in his dreams he would still be the eldest prince, but he was a prince who was loved by his parents, would not be locked up to have his blood taken, and could go out of the palace to play.
There would be candied haws on the street, but he had never seen a real candied haws, so he imagined it to look like a gourd with sugar on it. There would be people making clothes in a tailor's shop, but he had never seen one, so he imagined the tailors to be very skillful and able to make any kind of clothes.
There will be a shadow stand-in behind him to help carry the bag. The shadow stand-in has no ill will towards him and is just protecting him along the way.
In that case,
...It's really a beautiful dream.
Under the peach tree, Xiao Jingsan seemed to be in this dream as well. He covered his face with his fingers, but did not let go.
His shoulders were shaking slightly and his fingers were trembling.
He would never tell these secrets in his life, and would only keep them in his heart until he died. But when he saw Su Mingan who was willing to die, he felt like he saw that person again, and he couldn't hold back his throat.
"Xiao Jingsan." Su Mingan said softly.
"I actually thought that even if everyone in this generation of the royal family is not suitable to be the donor of the alien king, I can wait." Xiao Jingsan's voice was hoarse:
"I know in my heart that if I wait any longer, my life span will probably end, and it will be difficult to have another chance to revive the Alien King."
"But I still hope that you can be a little more selfish, a little more greedy, and think more about yourself. At least, I can convince myself that you are not that similar."
"But you just happened to grow up to be the most beautiful. Even if I am blind, even if I deceive myself, even if I beg myself to let it go, I can't convince myself to give up this generation. I know very well in my heart that I can't wait any longer. There is no one more suitable than you."
"——I must resurrect the Alien King. This is my mission."
"——You must become a qualified monarch. This is also your mission."
"So, at that moment - I suddenly realized that neither of us would abandon our mission for each other. You will not become a cowardly and selfish person because of your fear of death, and I will not give up on resurrecting the Alien King because of my short-sightedness."
"We... are not wrong."
Xiao Jingsan suddenly let go of his hand, there were still no tears in his eyes, just a slight redness.
"No, it's my fault."
"I clearly wanted to be your shadow substitute from the beginning, but I had to talk to you about so many stories outside the palace, taught you sword skills, and made you trust me... If these things hadn't happened, maybe it would have been better."
"I've obviously been thinking about having someone replace you, but it's impossible."
"Feel sorry."
Su Mingan was silent.
At this moment, he suddenly understood why these fairies all had black hair and black eyes, because they were all the alien king donors that Xiao Jingsan had been trying to cultivate for many years - if there was one of them who was more similar to the eldest prince, she could replace the eldest prince's fate.
Xiao Jingsan kept taking the eldest prince's blood in order to cultivate these people. He imprisoned the eldest prince to take his blood in the beginning - in order to save the eldest prince.
But, unfortunately, Su Shaoqing is the best.
No one was more brilliant than him, no one was better than him. No matter how they were cultivated or guided, these imitators could not compare to the beauty that was born to him.
Xiao Jingsan has been doing something futile but shocking.
He is trying to - create "original" artificially.
As long as he created a person like Su Shaoqing, he could avoid Su Shaoqing's fate of becoming a donor. But no matter what, he couldn't do it. So there were more and more black-haired and black-eyed people on the island, which made him more and more desperate.
Some people are impossible to imitate.
In the end, Xiao Jingsan had no choice but to pick up the shackles with his own hands and cut open a new wound on Su Shaoqing's arm - this was the first wound that was not for "saving" but for "hurting".
Its purpose changed from "taking blood to create the Original and saving Su Shaoqing" to "taking blood to harm Su Shaoqing and waiting for Su Ming'an to come".
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