Return to being a servant
When Jiang Manyan regained a faint sense of consciousness, the first thing she felt was no longer the cold wooden wall and the bumpy ride, but the warm water.
He felt as if he were in a warm bathtub, with someone gently and carefully wiping his body.
The congealed bloodstains and grime were washed away little by little, revealing the pale skin underneath covered with bluish-purple wounds.
The hot water stung the wound, but strangely relieved the stiffness in some areas.
A pair of cool, slender hands were holding a clean cloth, carefully cleaning his wounds while avoiding the more serious ones.
Jiang Manyan struggled to lift her heavy eyelids, her vision blurred...
In the misty steam, he saw a familiar, handsome, almost demonic lower half of a face.
It's Song Guansui!!
He was holding him and giving him a bath.
Song Guansui's movements were exceptionally focused and meticulous, even gentle, as if he were cleaning a precious piece of porcelain that had been lost and found again.
But his eyes remained cold, devoid of any warmth, as if he were merely performing a necessary task.
After bathing, he wrapped Jiang Manyan in a soft, dry towel and carried her to a clean bed.
Then, he took out the ointment and began to treat his gruesome wounds. His technique was surprisingly skilled; he cleaned, applied the medicine, and bandaged the wounds all in one smooth motion.
Jiang Manyan was powerless and could only let him do as he pleased.
The high fever clouded his mind, making it impossible for him to distinguish between reality and a hallucination of near-death.
Why is it that one moment you're in hell, and the next you feel like you're being carefully protected?
Song Guansui remained silent throughout, simply continuing with what he was doing.
Only after all the wounds had been treated and he had covered him with a blanket did he lean down slightly, his cold fingers brushing across Jiang Manyan's burning forehead.
"Remember this feeling."
His deep voice, like the hiss of a venomous snake, burrowed into Jiang Manyan's chaotic consciousness.
"The only one who can pull you out of your filthy illness is me. The only one who can keep you alive is me. The only one who can make you live like a human being is to obey me."
These cold words struck Jiang Manyan like a heavy hammer, brutally silencing his involuntary explanation.
“Brother, I didn’t mean to hurt you. After Mother passed away, you were the closest person to me.”
The young man reached out to grab the other's sleeve, but stopped in mid-air, his eyes glistening with tears.
"I stole half the cash just to get revenge on the cold-hearted Master Song, and also..." Liu, who might have caused her mother's death.
The young man lowered his head and swallowed the rest of his words.
That half of the cash was nothing to the Song family; his brother's pride would lead to retaliation, but not to...
"Brother... what happened next..."
Song Guansui lifted his chin, interrupting him, his eyes still cold.
"Stop your pathetic act. All you need to do is be my servant again."
His voice was as clear and noble as ever, yet it was as sharp and piercing as a cold wind, carrying a strong sense of coldness and aggression.
Like a newly quenched ice blade, every word he uttered carried a cold sharpness that could easily sever Jiang Manyan's nerves.
Jiang Manyan's unrealistic lingering thoughts about the past were shattered one by one.
Song Guansui straightened up, no longer looking at the weak person on the bed, turned and left the room, the door was gently closed, separating the inside from the outside.
Jiang Manyan lay in the soft, clean bedding. The physical pain seemed to have lessened somewhat, but the chill and despair in her heart had reached their peak.
Song Guansui successfully made him understand that the Song Guansui of the past was long gone, and that he was now just a vengeful man driven by a crazy obsession and a twisted possessiveness.
And he himself was the prisoner from whom he vented his anger, about to suffer endless torment, with nowhere to escape...
A weakened body, coupled with a tormented mind... my vision began to blur again.
...
While asleep, I unconsciously began to recall the past.
...
That year, I was five years old.
The first time, I was led into a very large and cold courtyard.
My mother held my hand tightly; her palms were sweaty and icy cold. I didn't understand why I had to leave our small but warm home.
I don't understand why people around us are looking at us with those strange eyes, like they're looking at a lame cat on the street corner.
That day, my mother was taken away by a nanny who looked very fierce.
I was left alone in a long corridor, and I was terrified. All I wanted to do was find a place to hide.
I tiptoed around to the back of a rockery, only to suddenly meet a pair of eyes.
A very handsome young man was sitting under the eaves, wearing sparkly clothes that I had never seen before, holding a thick book.
He looked much older than me. I stopped in my tracks, my heart pounding, remembering my mother's instructions not to upset anyone here.
I timidly called out in a soft, southern-accented voice, "Brother, brother."
He put down his book and beckoned to me: "Come here."
I hesitated, clutching the faded hem of my clothes, and slowly moved over.
He held my hand; his hand was warm, while mine was a little cold from fear.
He looked at me, and his eyes didn't seem as cold as those of the others, which made me a little less afraid.
From then on, I secretly longed to see this older brother.
He would always magically pull out sweet candied fruit from his sleeve and give it to me, something I hadn't tasted in a long time.
Back in the courtyard, my father treated my mother and me very well. He taught me to read and write, and brought me all sorts of delicious food...
But once they arrived at this large courtyard, everything changed...
Once, a servant in the kitchen deliberately gave me spoiled food, and he caught it.
He frowned, pulled me behind him, and said to the servants, "He's my brother, who dares to bully him?!"
At that time, I felt that my brother's back was so tall, like a small mountain that could block all wind and rain.
I became more and more attached to him, following behind him and calling him "brother this, brother that" incessantly.
I thought that in this cold courtyard, there was finally a little warmth that belonged to me.
Until that day...
My brother and I were in the garden. He pushed his delicate pastry to me, and we were huddled together, whispering and sharing our sweetness.
Suddenly, a piercing sound of jade shattering rang out! I was so frightened that I shrank back behind my brother. I saw Madam Liu, who always had a stern face—I later learned that she was my brother's mother and the most terrifying mistress of this mansion.
Madam Liu stood there, her face frighteningly gloomy.
"Song Guansui!" Her voice was shrill like a knife. "Who gave you permission to get so close to this bastard?"
My brother immediately stood up to protect me. Just as he was about to speak, "Slap!" A crisp sound rang out as Madam Liu's slap landed heavily on my brother's face.
My heart clenched!
"He's my brother!" the older brother said stubbornly, his neck stiff.
"Brother?" Madam Liu sneered, a laugh that sent chills down my spine. "A bastard born of a lowly concubine, does he even deserve to be your brother!"
Then, many servants rushed up.
I was roughly dragged away from behind my brother. He tried to stop me, but was blocked by more people.
The entire day was filled with a suffocating sense of oppression.
I was dragged to an open space, and the whips fell on my body like raindrops, burning with pain.
I bit my lip, not letting out a sound, my mind filled with the image of my brother's red cheeks as he was slapped and Mrs. Liu's cold eyes.
But it hurts so much...
"Smack!..."
With each crisp crack, a searing pain exploded on the skin.
I gasped sharply, my eyes widening instantly from the unbearable pain, and tears welled up.
But I bit my lower lip hard, choking back my sobs.
I can't cry. Mother said that crying here will only make the people who bully us happier. I can't let my brother... or the person who hit me see me cry...
Finally, my vision went black, and I was thrown into a dark and cold woodshed. Hungry and in pain, I drifted off to sleep...
I don't know how much time passed before I was dragged out and forced to kneel on the cold corridor. My whole body ached, and I had no strength left.
Then I saw my brother. He was holding a ruler in his hand, and his face was very pale, even paler than when he had been beaten that day.
He looked at me, raised the ruler in his hand, then lowered it, then raised it again. Finally, the ruler landed heavily on my arm.
"Smack!" Ouch.
I looked at him, puzzled. Why? Why would my brother, who had given me candied fruit and protected me just a few days ago, hit me now?
"Slap...slap..."
The third time, the fourth time...
The ruler was no longer limited to the arms; it was now used on the back and legs.
Each blow felt like it was trying to shatter my bones and tear my flesh apart.
I tried to dodge, but I was powerless and held down by two maids, unable to move.
The cold stone slabs pressed against my knees, and the burning pain on my body intertwined with the agony, tormenting me to the point that I almost fainted.
The initial stubbornness and incomprehension were gradually replaced by pure fear and despair under the constant torment of excruciating pain.
I looked at my brother. His face was pale, his lips were tightly pressed together, and his eyes were like ice. He was swinging the ruler again and again, as if I were some kind of mindless puppet.
He's not the brother who gave me candied fruit anymore.
He's not the brother who would protect me anymore... He's a... stranger who would beat me so badly.
This realization terrified me more than the ruler... Something inside me shattered with a "crack," louder than the sound of Madam Liu smashing her jade ruyi.
When another ruler struck my already swollen and aching back, I finally couldn't take it anymore.
The sobs she had been holding back burst forth like a flood breaking through a dam, suddenly escaping her throat.
"Wow—Ahhh—!"
That wasn't a quiet sob, but a heart-wrenching wail filled with pain and fear.
Tears streamed down her face, blurring her vision, mixed with snot and blood from the corner of her mouth, leaving her looking utterly disheveled.
I cried so hard my whole body was convulsing, gasping for breath. Every breath pulled at my wounds, bringing even sharper pain, but I couldn't stop.
"Ooh... Mother... Mother... It hurts... It hurts so much..."
I cried out unconsciously, like a small, severely wounded animal on the verge of death, with no other way to vent my pain except in the most primal way.
All the strength and patience vanished under the dual collapse of body and mind.
At that moment, all that remained was boundless pain and immense resentment and fear at being betrayed by the person I trusted most...
I don't understand, I don't understand why all of this is happening. Why did I have to leave home? Why are my mother and I locked up? Why has my brother changed?
My cries echoed in the empty courtyard until my strength was exhausted and my consciousness was once again swallowed by darkness...
When I woke up again, I found myself lying on a bed in a dilapidated hut, my whole body aching so badly I couldn't move, and my body covered in foul-smelling herbs.
My mother secretly wiped away her tears. From then on, my mother and I had to serve Madam Liu every day, doing the dirtiest and most tiring work. If we were not careful, we would be beaten and scolded.
I never saw my brother again, the one who gave me candied fruit and protected me. Later I heard that he went to study at Luoan Academy, which is very far away.
That large courtyard has reverted to its original state, a place filled only with coldness and fear.
That brief warmth, like a small patch of sunlight in the shade of a rockery, quickly vanished, leaving only a deeper chill and countless nights of hidden pain...
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