Is that too much to ask?
Zhou Junchang's wound became infected, and every slight movement was accompanied by pain.
After spending the night outside, Zhou Junchang returned home as dawn was breaking.
After treating his wound briefly, Zhou Jun lay on the sofa, and thought about what happened last night again.
Perhaps because he was too tired, Zhou Junchang actually fell asleep and even had a dream.
In the dream, there was an unopened door, and Xu Li's crying could be heard from inside, as if she was enduring unspeakable pain.
Zhou Jun knocked on the door forcefully, but the door remained unmoved.
In fact, Xu Li wasn't the only one who felt desperate at that time.
Faced with this situation, Zhou Junchang would also feel despair.
That tightly closed door seemed to be an eternal barrier between the two; Xu Li couldn't get out, and Zhou Jun couldn't get in.
But Zhou Junchang seemed to be able to see Xu Li's small body, curled up in the corner, trembling.
It was dark all around, and it seemed that if you tried to take it back, you would never be able to.
Zhou Jun woke up covered in sweat and checked the time, finding that two hours had passed.
These two hours felt incredibly long. The powerful contrast between the darkness of my dream and the daytime reality left me feeling as if I had been through another world when I woke up.
Zhou Jun still wanted to go find Xu Li, even though his wound was still very painful, but he could bear it.
After knocking on the door for the third time, there was no response from inside.
"Xu Li?..."
A terrible thought seemed to flash through my mind.
No, no...
"Xu Li?..."
Zhou Jun knocked on the door again, but there was still no response.
Zhou Jun often felt that the whole building was extremely quiet, at least that's how he felt. He even felt that as long as Xu Li was in the room, even if she didn't make a sound, he could feel her presence.
However, this quiet cold-bloodedness is devoid of warmth.
No, maybe... she went to Tian Guang Hall.
Zhou Jun often took out his phone, unaware that his hands were trembling slightly.
First, I called Xu Li, but she didn't answer.
Then, Zhou Junchang called Afeng again.
As the phone beeped, Zhou Junchang's heart pounded with each beep.
Until Zhou Junchang seemed to actually hear footsteps.
Then, a familiar voice called him.
It wasn't from the phone; it was from behind him.
He turned around and became the person in front of him.
Zhou Jun looked at Xu Li, initially in disbelief, then suddenly feeling moved.
He didn't want to lose his temper anymore. The moment he saw Xu Li, nothing else seemed to matter. As long as she was there, it seemed he could let go of many things.
Xu Li looked at Zhou Jun's red eyes and the unanswered calls on his phone, and instantly understood what he was thinking.
After Xu Li learned that Zhou Junchang had left, she packed up her belongings at home. She sold some of the usable items and left the rest for nearby welfare homes and nursing homes.
There were quite a lot of things, and Xu Li made several trips.
When I came back this time, I saw Zhou Jun standing at the door.
Xu Li felt a mix of emotions, looking at Zhou Junchang and realizing that he wasn't feeling any better than Zhou Junchang.
This was the first time the two had met since Zhou Junchang was discharged from the hospital. He looked at her, and she looked at him; it seemed like they couldn't get enough of looking at each other.
It seemed that Zhou Junchang wouldn't have wanted to come in if Xu Li hadn't spoken up.
In the end, Xu Li let Zhou Junchang in.
The house is quite empty now; most of the things have been packed away.
Xu Li felt a pang of regret. As Zhou Junchang's gaze swept over every corner of the room, Xu Li couldn't help but feel sad.
The deadline for parting was fast approaching, but neither of them knew how to say goodbye.
Are you busy?
The question seemed a bit nonsensical, and Xu Li shook her head directly: "No."
"Then, come with me."
Upon hearing this, Xu Li was reminded of the rural love stories that her parents' generation loved to watch.
The male protagonist said to the female protagonist, "Let's elope," and then the two of them really did run away together.
But she couldn't. She had escaped once, but she couldn't escape a second time. The fear and decisiveness she felt the first time were something she could never repeat. It was a decision she made after being driven to the brink and enduring unspeakable pain.
Xu Li will never have that courage again, nor does she want to go through that kind of pain again.
Zhou Jun often brought Xu Li to the billiards hall.
It's just not Tianguang Hall.
Tian Guang Hall is more convenient, but in the past, it was full of acquaintances. Every now and then, someone would come over to say hello, so I couldn't relax at all.
This billiards place was one that Xu Li had never even heard of before when he came to Yangzhou.
Zhou Junchang set up a table and handed the stick to Xu Li: "Want to play?"
Xu Li had been standing in the billiard hall for several months, so she should have learned a bit by now, but only Xu Li knew that her skills weren't that great.
She usually just puts on an act, gives a few perfunctory answers to customers, and everyone thinks she's a master who doesn't easily show herself.
Xu Li gripped the pole, looking troubled, but not wanting to spoil Zhou Junchang's fun, she braced herself and went for it.
When Xu Li teed off, her power was insufficient, and she barely managed to break up the ball.
At that time, Xu Li actually felt a little guilty, blaming herself for not practicing more for so long. Perhaps she could still have a good time playing with Zhou Junchang now, because this was one of the few times they could spend together.
As Xu Li was hitting the second ball, her fingertips holding the cue felt cold. Suddenly, she felt a warm sensation coming from behind her. Zhou Junchang's palm passed through her hair and pressed against the cue, his wrist brushing against her ear and lifting a few strands of hair.
Knowing it was Zhou Junchang, in that instant, subconscious resistance overcame fear.
It was a very special body; it seemed that getting close to him brought warmth, and it made Xu Li feel nostalgic.
"Raise your elbows a little higher." Zhou Junchang's voice was as crisp as if it were coated with a mint candy. His knuckles covered the back of her hand holding the stick, and his thumb and forefinger gently closed.
Xu Li could clearly count the lines on his wrist, his eyelashes trembling in the light and shadow, like the wings of a startled butterfly.
Zhou Jun continued to whisper in Xu Li's ear: "You need to keep your left hand fixed, and then control the angle with your right hand... Yes, you need to see which ball you're hitting... and then, how you need to move the ball..."
Zhou Junchang's voice lingered in her ears, and Xu Li numbly followed Zhou Junchang's hand movements, as if everything was truly immersive.
However, such good times will probably never come again.
Holding Zhou Junchang in his arms, Xu Li was surprised to find herself feeling incredibly safe, a feeling she hadn't experienced in a long time.
Zhou Jun guided Xu Li's movements step by step, and the ball went into the hole beautifully.
Then one ball after another, with a few missing in between, Zhou Junchang would let go and shoot again on his own.
Actually, it was just a game of billiards that Zhou Junchang played against himself, but Zhou Junchang seemed to enjoy it quite a bit.
Even later on, regardless of whether the ball went in or not, Zhou Junchang continued to teach Xu Li.
In fact, Zhou Junchang was also reluctant to part with it.
Looking at Xu Li's back, it seemed as if she might disappear at any moment. Heaven knows how much he restrained himself to resist the urge to pull her into his arms.
To their surprise, Zhou Junchang cried.
He must have been so sad, so heartbroken, that someone who never liked to cry shed tears.
Xu Li couldn't hold back anymore, and tears instantly streamed down her face. She cried and apologized, "I'm...sorry...I'm sorry..."
The sudden apology seemed to make this heartwarming scene a little awkward.
Zhou Junchang's voice was much hoarse, his chin almost touching the top of her head. His voice came right next to Xu Li's ear: "Do you remember what I told you? You never need to apologize to me."
But no, the more Zhou Junchang acted this way, the more guilty Xu Li felt.
She really had a lot to say about Zhou Junchang. Even though she knew that apologizing was useless, at least it would make her feel better.
In the past few days, especially last night, Xu Li suddenly understood why Zhou Ji said not to leave without saying goodbye. If she really left like that, then she thought that Zhou Junchang probably wouldn't be able to accept it. So the fact of saying goodbye was unavoidable, and some words had to be said.
Xu Li didn't know if she would ever be able to come back; perhaps this was their last meeting.
This is truly a heavy topic; to bring it up to someone who doesn't want to leave is a punishment for everyone involved.
"I...I really have to go...I'm sorry...I'm really...sorry..."
The two were very close and could both feel each other's sadness.
Zhou Junchang didn't know what was holding Xu Li back, why she was driven to a dead end, why Zhou Ji couldn't solve the problem, and why Xu Li had to leave.
If we go back to Linpu, then Duan Ruiming is the only one there? It can't be him. If it were related to him, Duan Ruiming could have come by himself. So who else could it be?
In a flash, a name crossed my mind: Fei Li?
Zhou Jun often thought of this name. He had only met his parents once, on that one night.
At that time, Xu Li's reaction was also strange. Why did she look scared and somewhat terrified, as if she was afraid of being discovered...?
Could it really be related to Fei Li?
It seemed that he suddenly understood something. It was from then on that Zhou Junchang felt uneasy. At that time, he couldn't explain why he had this feeling, but there were already some hints at it.
"...Feili?"
Hearing this name, Xu Li felt a sharp pain in her heart.
Zhou Junchang is very smart, and it's possible that when many things are connected, they do become very clear.
Xu Li straightened up and looked into Zhou Jun's eyes. In fact, the two of them had a lot to say, but they couldn't say it.
"Do you remember that middle-aged couple we met on the street one night? When I saw them in Yangzhou, I had a premonition that my time here was running out, but I didn't expect it to come so soon. This day has come so quickly, and there are so many things I haven't had time to do..."
It turns out that Xu Li knew she would leave one day, but Zhou Junchang didn't know at the time.
In the time that followed, Xu Li thought that she was a thousand times more pained than him. It turned out that Xu Li knew so early on that the countdown had already begun between them.
So, how much pain must Xu Li have been in when Zhou Jun was looking at her back then?
He was too self-centered and failed to notice these details. If he had paid more attention, although it wouldn't have changed the fact that she was leaving, at least Xu Li wouldn't have had to bear it all alone.
"You said you believed in me. Do you know how incredibly happy I was at that moment? You were so resolute; no one had ever said that to me before."
"Yes, I've always believed in you."
"You also want to know why I have to leave, right? I didn't come back to Linpu because anyone was waiting for me, but why do I have to leave..." Xu Li couldn't continue speaking. She had never told anyone before, but if she didn't tell Zhou Junchang now, who else could she tell? If she didn't even trust Zhou Junchang, who else could she trust?
"It's because I have to go to the police station, which is a very troublesome matter. I... I don't know if I'll be able to come back."
So this was what Xu Li had been keeping from everyone, and now she finally chose to believe him and explain it to him little by little.
However, Zhou Junchang did not feel the long-lost joy in his heart, because he seemed to be powerless to change this fact.
So why did Xu Li say so early on not to believe what others said and to see for yourself? Why was she so resistant to Duan Ruiming? Why was she so reluctant to bring up those things?
Xu Li must have had many unavoidable circumstances, which is why she is suffering so much.
Zhou Junchang was so heartbroken that he forgot about his wound. He raised his hand to wipe away Xu Li's tears and then said, "Okay."
Zhou Jun didn't want to say anything more. He wasn't the type to say sweet words, so his agreement was more like a promise.
I promised that I would accept whatever happened, so I would always remain the same.
They didn't speak again after that. Once Xu Li calmed down, the two walked together on the street. This area wasn't close to the city center, so there were no tall buildings. In the afternoon, you could see a beautiful sunset on the street.
I wonder if I'll ever see such a beautiful sunset again, or if I'll ever see it with the people around me again.
The setting sun was a beautiful red, and Xu Li suddenly remembered the red lanterns that Zhou Jun often hung up during the Spring Festival.
At that time, Zhou Jun often timed it perfectly so that Xu Li could make a wish. Then, when she opened her eyes, the moment the fireworks exploded, she felt as if the whole world had lit up.
Xu Li remembered the wish she and Zhou Jun had made at the door on a moonlit night.
At that time, Zhou Junchang didn't say what his wish was, and neither did she. What she wished for was that she could still be here next year.
Because of a premonition, this turned into a wish.
I hope she can still be here next year.
It wasn't just a simple wish that she could stay here; it was a wish that she could be with Zhou Junchang.
So, I hope that you and I can still be here next year.
People will only pursue what they don't have or desire, step by step.
A wish is just a wish; if it cannot be fulfilled, it becomes a pipe dream.
It is precisely because it is unpredictable and even hopeless that it exists in the form of a wish.
So, I cherish Zhou Junchang very much, and I have tried to resist him, but as I've come this far, there really isn't a good way out.
I've always been sorry to you, but please accept this fact.
Only when I am here can you be here with me.
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