Anonymous Thoughts
The vibration of the phone was particularly abrupt in the quiet room.
Zhou Jianxing was staring at the homepage of the software with big blue eyes, her fingertips unconsciously swiping across the avatars that had no interest in her.
A slight "ding dong" sound brought her back to her senses.
She clicked on the notification bar and squinted at the message, which was from "Seal the Heart and Lock Love".
Someone sent her a message on their own initiative, even after she frantically "winked" at him but received no response.
Zhou Jianxing sat up straight with excitement, her fingers hovering over the screen, their tips trembling slightly. What should she say? What was going on? Her mind was blank, completely unsure how to start a conversation on this kind of app.
Star: Hello
Zhou Jianxing stared at the dry greeting he had sent and frowned in annoyance.
This is too stupid. Will the other party think she is boring?
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Hello. :) Your profile seems empty, are you new here? You seem a little lost?"
Wen Lingyi stared at the screen, her fingertips elegantly gliding across the rim of the cup. She deliberately used a relaxed tone and emojis to create a gentle and harmless illusion, lowering the other person's guard.
Zhou Jianxing breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the reply. The other party didn't seem to mind her clumsiness. She carefully considered her words.
Xingxing: "Yeah... I just downloaded it. Really... I'm a little unsure how to use it."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Haha, I understand. A lot of people feel the same way at first. Are you curious and want to see? Or... are you a little confused and want to find answers?"
This question was like a soft feather, gently scratching the most itchy and confusing part of Zhou Jianxing's heart.
She hesitated. Could she say this to a stranger? But this person was the only one who had spoken to her.
Xingxing: "Probably... a little bit of both. Mainly... confusion."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Oh? Are you willing to talk? Sometimes chatting with strangers can actually help you relax. I... just act like a tree hole?"
Zhou Jianxing was stunned. She desperately needed an outlet to confide in, someone who wouldn't judge her with realistic eyes. The "sealed heart, locked love" on the other side of the screen was now that dark tree hole.
Xingxing: "I... seem to have fallen in love with someone."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Isn't it a good thing to like someone? Why are you confused?"
Wen Lingyi's nails dug into her palms unconsciously. Zhou Jianxing fell in love with someone? Who was it?
Xingxing: "Because...that person...she is already married."
After hesitating for a long time, Zhou Jianxing typed the three words "married". It seemed as if she had used up all her strength. Her cheeks were hot and her heart was beating heavily in her chest.
Wen Lingyi's fingers tightened around the phone. Zhou Jianxing had admitted his feelings for her.
Is that her? The married woman.
Her scalp began to tingle, like the mellowest champagne exploding with countless bubbles of joy in her body.
“Puff—”
A clear laugh escaped Wen Lingyi's lips uncontrollably, which seemed particularly abrupt in the elegant restaurant filled with jazz music. She quickly raised her hand to cover her mouth, but she could no longer hide the bright smile that streamed from the corners of her eyes and eyebrows, and the suddenly bright eyes that brightened surprisingly.
Su Qing, who was sitting opposite her, was cutting steak elegantly. She was so startled by her sudden laughter and the instantaneous brilliance that she paused with her fork.
She narrowed her eyes and looked at Wen Lingyi carefully - that was definitely not a social smile, but a secret sweet joy that overflowed from the depths of her eyes.
Thinking of Wen Lingyi's unusually cheerful expression when they last met, Su Qing's alarm bells suddenly rang.
"Hey, hey, hey!" Su Qing put down her knife and fork, leaned forward slightly, lowered her voice, and her eyes were as sharp as searchlights. "Miss Wen, you're not in the right state! Last time, it was 'finding a treasure'? This time it's 'winning the lottery'? You're smiling like a flower! Tell me the truth, what are you so happy about? Is...something going on?"
Wen Lingyi was still savoring the satisfaction of seeing the words "She's married" on the screen. When she heard Su Qing's question, she didn't bother to hide it anymore. She lifted her wine glass, gently swirling the dark red liquid inside, her red lips curling into a lazy yet slightly complacent curve.
"Hmm," Wen Lingyi admitted frankly, her eyes sweeping over Su Qing. "Do you remember the tall female worker I saw at my door?"
"The female maintenance worker whose eyes you glued to the first time you met her?" Su Qing raised her eyebrows and immediately reacted.
"That's her." Wen Lingyi nodded, her eyes becoming playful. "More interesting than I thought... Right now," she shook her phone, the screen still stuck on the "Star" dialog box, "we're having 'in-depth communication'."
"In-depth communication?!" Su Qing's voice rose a half-degree, then quickly lowered itself, "Lingyi! Are you...are you serious? Didn't you say last time that you weren't interested in her? And you said you didn't want to be in a relationship anymore, but from the way you look at it...it doesn't seem like you're just playing around!"
Seeing the gentleness and determination on Wen Lingyi's face, her heart was filled with alarm bells. "I'm telling you, you can play with this kind of innocent little white rabbit with such a huge difference in status, but don't get caught up in it. You won't be able to get rid of it, and it will be very troublesome. Don't forget the pain after the scar has healed and make trouble for yourself again!"
"Don't worry, Qingqing." Wen Lingyi raised her glass to Su Qing soothingly, her smile still bright, "I know what's going on. I just think it's very interesting." She no longer looked at Su Qing's worried eyes, and turned her attention back to the mobile phone screen. Zhou Jianxing was still waiting for her response.
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "So that's how it is. It's indeed a complicated situation."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "I can sense that you're troubled and feeling guilty. Is she... good to you? Or rather, has she done anything... to make you think she might be a little special to you?"
So, did Zhou Jianxing understand her teasing or not?
Xingxing: "She's very nice to me. She gives me water and... watches me work for a long time."
Xingxing: "She...she always gets so close, her fingers would accidentally touch me. They're so cool and soft...Every time they touch me, I feel like I'm getting an electric shock. My heart beats so fast and my face gets so hot. I don't dare look into her eyes. They're so beautiful, they seem to draw me in..."
Xingxing: "She also said some... strange things. She kept saying that the garden had been left uncultivated for too long and needed to be loosened, and that the flowers would be lonely if no one cared for them... But when I told her how to loosen the soil, she laughed again..."
Xingxing: "She has a very gentle smile and once called me a little fool... Of course, I'm not stupid!"
Xingxing: "What... makes me most nervous is... the way she looks at me... very, very deeply... I don't know if I'm overthinking it..."
Xingxing: "I must be overthinking it! I shouldn't have thought that about her...it's so vulgar..."
Xingxing: "Every time I go to see her, I feel like I'm walking a tightrope. I'm desperately telling myself not to think about her because she's married, but at the same time, I can't help but anticipate her. Seeing her makes me so happy... Then I come back and scold myself for being shameless... I'm going crazy..."
Xingxing: "I know... this is immoral... being a third party... destroying someone else's family... I... I really don't know what to do..."
Each message revealed the girl's first love excitement, irresistible attraction, deep-seated guilt and great confusion, all displayed to Wen Lingyi without reservation.
Wen Lingyi read word by word, as if she could touch Zhou Jianxing's hot and sincere heart, which was tormented between morality and lust, through the cold screen.
Her heart also rose and fell with the words, and an unprecedented sense of satisfaction, being desired so purely and passionately, mixed with a trace of inappropriate heartache, spread in her chest.
Wen Lingyi was silent for a moment, her fingertips tapping lightly on the screen, as if trying to form her words. Zhou Jianxing also fell silent, as if she was holding her breath for "Tree Hole"'s response, or as if expressing her true thoughts had exhausted all her energy.
Finally, Wen Lingyi's reply popped up.
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Xingxing, thank you for telling me this. Hearing you say this, I can feel your inner struggle and the true throbbing."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "You know what? Actually... I also liked a married woman. It was a long time ago."
Zhou Jianxing's eyes widened instantly! The other party...had the same experience?!
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "At that time, I was just like you. I felt terrible and ashamed. But later, I gradually understood."
Seal the Heart and Lock the Love: "Loving someone is never shameful."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Some women marry not because they deeply love the man. It may be due to family pressure, social pressure, or the constraints of personal interests. It may just be a choice made at the time... Marriage is sometimes just a formality, or even a cage."
Sealing the Heart and Locking Love: "So, if the lady you like shows you a closeness and specialness, it's not just your illusion, but she also has the same feelings for you..."
Feng Xin Suo Ai: "Then how can this be considered destroying other people's feelings?"
Sealed Heart Locked Love: "Perhaps this is just two imprisoned hearts that found the glimmer of attraction to each other at the wrong time and place."
Wen Lingyi looked at the last few words she had uttered and pursed her lips.
The screen's light reflected on her delicate face, a complex, indiscernible emotion. She gently put down her phone, picked up the wine glass, and drank the deep crimson wine in one gulp. The tangy, pungent liquid slid down her throat, but it couldn't suppress the silent, raging fire in her heart, ignited by Zhou Jianxing's honesty.
The lights in the restaurant flickered in her eyes, as if reflecting the figure in the garden who was sweating profusely in the sun, with pure and passionate eyes.
Su Qing's worried words were still ringing in her ears, but at this moment, Wen Lingyi only clearly heard one voice, the heartbeat of that little star, across the screen, across gender, across class, across the shackles of morality, was frantically cheering for her.
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