Believers in God
The afterglow of passion had not yet completely dissipated in the air, like an invisible and sticky gauze, wrapping the two people hugging each other in the bedroom.
The moonlight was filtered by the thick clouds, leaving only a thin halo, which sprinkled in sparingly through the gauze curtains that were not completely drawn, barely outlining the outline of Wen Lingyi lying on her side.
Her breathing had calmed down, and her fingertips unconsciously entangled a strand of Zhou Jianxing's sweaty hair, which she gently pushed aside to reveal his smooth and full forehead.
The air was filled with the lazy scent after the passion faded, mixed with the light fragrance of shower gel and the unique warmth from each other.
"I'm going on a business trip tomorrow," Wen Lingyi's voice was hoarse, like it had been rubbed by sandpaper, and her heat fell heavily on Zhou Jianxing's ears. "I'll be gone for three days."
"Ah?" Zhou Jianxing's heart was gently hit by the voice, and he was instantly awakened from the afterglow of happiness.
"Baby, don't miss me too much." She said as she kissed and sucked Zhou Jianxing's plump earlobe.
"Itchy." Zhou Jianxing shrank back and turned to look at Wen Lingyi.
Wen Lingyi was the most gentle at this time, and her voice became light and soft. Her soft lips would be gently pressed on Zhou Jianxing's forehead, round nose, and slightly hot cheeks over and over again with a tender and soothing force.
The eyes will also become particularly gentle, not the kind of gentleness that comes from deliberately stretching the eye muscles, but the gentleness that comes naturally when the ice in the heart melts into warm water, enough to support the person who is immersed in it.
Looking at those eyes, Zhou Jianxing's heart seemed to be wrapped in soft clouds, floating lightly.
At this time, Zhou Jianxing would feel from the bottom of her heart that Wen Lingyi also liked her.
Wen Lingyi's peach blossom eyes would turn slightly red after lovemaking, and the almost transparent red would show through the snow-white skin texture. It was only a thin layer, like a drop of rouge spreading in the water, the beauty after the tide of love.
Because of this warm color, the naturally upturned eye tail lines also appear peaceful.
Against the backdrop of moonlight, Wen Lingyi's face glowed with the lustrous luster of mother-of-pearl, and she was as beautiful as a goddess walking out of the silent scroll of ancient Greek mythology.
Beneath the divine tranquility, there is also the compassion of lowering one's brows because of the cruelty of heaven and earth.
God will also kiss her. Zhou Jianxing is willing to be the most devout believer.
God will have mercy and kiss her believers.
The deepest fear of believers is that the gods will turn away.
"Are you alone?" Zhou Jianxing couldn't help but stretch out his fingers and carefully touched Wen Lingyi's slightly red eyelids. The delicate touch felt like touching a piece of solidified grease.
A subtle itch made Wen Lingyi subconsciously grasp her troublesome fingers and remove them from her eyelids. She could clearly read the reluctance that was about to overflow from Zhou Jianxing's eyes, and her heart felt like it was gently bumped by something soft, and an unfamiliar soreness appeared.
She lowered her head, and her slightly cool lips placed a soothing kiss on the restless fingertips.
"No," she said, her voice still low and husky, with a hint of explanation in it, "My assistant is with me. The itinerary has been set."
The air conditioner made a low hum, which further accentuated the brief silence in the room.
"Is it a man or a woman?" Zhou Jianxing continued to ask, his eyes as if drawn by an invisible thread, looking at Wen Lingyi's slightly drooping eyelids.
The window screens fluttered gently in the wind, and the moonlight cast swaying shadows on the floor.
Wen Lingyi released Zhou Jianxing's fingers, and the warmth from her fingertips suddenly disappeared, bringing with it a slightly cooler air.
Why does the other person always like to try to touch the boundary between them again and again?
As his hands loosened, his eyes also turned cold, and the tenderness in his eyes quickly faded away, revealing the cold and hard reef underneath like the receding tide.
The warmth that had just filled the bedroom disappeared completely.
Zhou Jianxing, however, refused to give up and grabbed Wen Lingyi's hand, placing it on her chest, and moved it all the way down along the undulating curves of her body until they stopped at the door again. The host had already opened the door and warmly invited her in.
It is a silent invitation for believers to make a self-sacrifice to her god with the utmost determination.
"What?" Wen Lingyi's voice suddenly rose a little, clearly mixed with shame and offense.
She pulled her hand away from the heat with a sudden effort, as if she had been burned. The movement sent a cool breeze across the suddenly widened distance between them.
"I want you to like me more." There was no lust in Zhou Jianxing's eyes, and his voice was unusually calm.
If Wen Lingyi's eyes are bottomless deep pools, then Zhou Jianxing's eyes are shallow ponds that can be seen through at a glance. Emotions can easily float on the surface of the water without any cover, and it is difficult to ignore them.
Zhou Jianxing's shallow transparency is due to the fact that she has been too well protected by her parents and friends since she was a child. She has never experienced any major storms and has never been hurt by anyone.
Therefore, naturally, they don’t know how to hide or defend themselves.
So far, Wen Lingyi has been the biggest storm in her peaceful life, stirring up waves in her heart that cannot be calmed down. She is also the most thorough and rebellious "deviance" in her law-abiding life.
And those waves will cause circles of uneasy ripples on the surface of the pond.
At this moment, Zhou Jianxing's heart was rippled, and the frequency of the ripples was interpreted by Wen Lingyi as uneasiness.
So, in Zhou Jianxing's straightforward understanding, the foundation of Wen Lingyi's "love" was solely her body? Was it necessary to repeatedly give her body to strengthen that shaky "love"?
Wen Lingyi felt a sense of absurd agreement in her heart—wasn't that how it had been in the beginning? Just a game to fill a void.
Suddenly, Wen Lingyi felt a sense of fatigue similar to "impotence", or perhaps the previous lingering had exhausted her passion and made her enter an unusually clear-headed "sage time".
In this calm ruin, she began to inevitably examine the blurred and entangled boundaries between sex and love in this relationship.
At this point, what is sincerity? And what is insincere? She deliberately tried to ignore those feelings, but Zhou Jianxing reminded her to remember them by crossing the line again and again.
So, Zhou Jianxing may indeed be a silly person, but her humility and obedience, frankness and directness, or in other words, her "flattery" without any skills and based entirely on instinct, is more effective for Wen Lingyi than any carefully designed love strategy.
Because Zhou Jianxing's flattery always made Wen Lingyi feel like a stone had hit her heart, and the softest part of her heart was scratched by the hard edges, causing stinging and soreness.
So, under Zhou Jianxing's ignorant and pressing step by step, Wen Lingyi herself unconsciously retreated step by step, allowing the other party to keep approaching the border.
"Don't think too much, woman." Wen Lingyi's palm covered Zhou Jianxing's skin again, just lingering on the other's waist, using gentle force to make circles to soothe her. "It's just a simple colleague relationship. She has a boyfriend."
She stepped back again, just wanting to calm Zhou Jianxing's anxiety.
The humming of the air conditioner stopped, and the only sound in the room was the mingling breathing of the two people.
Zhou Jianxing smiled, his eyebrows and eyes curved like a plump pea pod.
Her arms are two elongated sections of dusk, and when she hugs her, she can isolate the loneliness of the entire night.
The furry head was buried in Wen Lingyi's arms, and one leg pressed heavily on her thigh, clamping her like a clamp.
Wen Lingyi was firmly locked in Zhou Jianxing's arms and body temperature.
Damn kid, your legs are so heavy.
Wen Lingyi complained silently in her heart, but her body honestly chose to accept it.
She did not push Zhou Jianxing away. Instead, in the darkness, she adjusted her posture almost imperceptibly so that they could snuggle together more comfortably.
Outside the window, the clouds seemed to disperse a little, the moonlight became a little brighter, and the overlapping figures of the two people were cast on the sheets.
·
In the middle of the night, Zhou Jianxing woke up again.
She dreamed that Wen Lingyi was kissing a faceless person, whose gender could not be clearly identified. It could be a colleague who was going on a business trip with Wen Lingyi, or it could be someone else.
Wen Lingyi was already fast asleep. In the slightly cold and dim moonlight of the middle of the night, her sleeping face appeared almost transparent and fragile. All the sharpness and alienation that had been revealed from the bottom of her heart when she was awake had faded away, revealing an unguarded tranquility.
Like an ancient porcelain piece with white background and blue and white patterns, it has been imbued with a unique, lonely charm by the passage of time. As if fully aware of its own fragility, this porcelain has long been accustomed to isolating itself within an invisible glass display case, refusing any touch that might cause harm.
If there ever comes a day when they fall and break into pieces... Zhou Jianxing will always be there to hold Wen Lingyi up steadily with all his strength the moment before she hits the ground.
The air conditioner's low hum had completely ceased at some point. The pre-dawn chill was the most pervasive, seeping silently through the cracks in the windows and the walls. The night was as cold as water, penetrating deep into the bone marrow.
Zhou Jianxing held his breath and carefully pulled himself out of Wen Lingyi's arms, almost moving, for fear of waking her up.
She fumbled and gently pulled up the thin blanket that had slipped to their waists, carefully and tightly covering Wen Lingyi's exposed waist, abdomen and shoulders, properly wrapping up the parts that were vulnerable to cold.
She might look a little silly, but her mind wasn't completely muddled. Wen Lingyi's omnipresent, deliberate sense of boundaries, her ambivalent distance, hung like an invisible sword of Damocles over Zhou Jianxing's head.
Even though Wen Lingyi would affectionately call her "baby" and murmur "I like it" when she was moved, those sweet words were like sugar coating, temporarily covering the bitter core.
However, how can true love require such clear-cut and insurmountable boundaries?
Zhou Jianxing always felt like she would be struck out. She still had to figure out on her own what she could and could not touch.
Why did Wen Lingyi choose her? She had revealed the reason long ago: emptiness, loneliness, and coldness.
It doesn't take a specific, unique person to fill these things. For someone with a low enough level of tolerance, anyone can do.
Do you like Zhou Jianxing? What exactly do you like about her? Is it her youthful body? Her decent looks? Or is it the emotional value of her self-deprecation?
These qualities are not unique in this vast world and can be replaced at any time.
Then how did Zhou Jianxing become the unique star in Wen Lingyi's universe?
She lay down again, facing Wen Lingyi sideways, and stared at the sleeping face in the moonlight from a very close distance.
A strong impulse surged in his heart. He wanted to kiss Wen Lingyi fiercely on the lips, to confirm their existence in the most intense way possible, to stir up the storm in Wen Lingyi's calm heart.
But she held it back.
They were clearly lying on the same bed, and their bodies had reached a negative distance, but Wen Lingyi's heart was always out of reach of Zhou Jianxing, separated by the vast sea of stars.
Wen Lingyi once asked her: "What would you do if I left you?"
Zhou Jianxing had never thought about it, or rather, she simply did not allow herself to think deeply about that question.
Otherwise, she would lose even the ability to enjoy the present moment.
Only when you know nothing will you not suffer so much.
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