Reverse blacklist
The light from the phone screen reflected on Wen Lingyi's face, illuminating her slightly furrowed brows and tightly pursed lips.
She had already released "Xingxing" from the blacklist. At this moment, her fingertips were hovering above the cold glass screen, repeatedly opening and closing the chat box with Zhou Jianxing.
The white input box is empty, like a piece of snow where no one has ever stepped.
But she didn't know how to leave her first footprints on the snow.
She held her cell phone, her thoughts like a ball of yarn played with by a cat, tangled together and unable to find the end of the thread.
There are so many things I want to say: apologies, explanations, regrets, and longings... Every sentence weighs heavily on my chest, but I don't know how to turn them into orderly words.
She couldn't help but wonder what Zhou Jianxing's reaction would be on the other side of the screen after the message was sent.
Should I write a long and eloquent essay accusing her? Curse her? Block her? Or just ignore her like she's air?
The more I tried to express my thoughts clearly, the more timid I became. My fingers were frozen and I couldn't even type a simple word.
It seemed that no matter how she chose words or phrases, she could not express the complex emotions in her heart.
But the mistake was hers, and the first step must be taken by her.
No matter what, she needs to be brave this time.
Wen Lingyi took a deep breath, as if he was going to die, and his fingertips finally fell.
Shuiyue Gallery - Wen Lingyi: "Zhou Jianxing, let's not break up, okay?"
She stared at the words, her heart beating heavily in her chest.
Can I go back to the past?
Just like before they separated, sharing body temperature and heartbeat, letting love regenerate. Even if it is impossible to pretend that nothing happened, can you give her a chance to make amends and save the relationship?
Time passed minute by minute, and there was no prompt "The other party is typing..." at the top of the screen.
The message still lay there alone.
Wen Lingyi lowered her eyes and looked at her hands resting on her legs. She unconsciously curled up her fingers and then slowly stretched them out.
The light on the screen dimmed, reflecting her somewhat unfocused pupils, but she still received no response.
She turned on the screen again and sent another message through gritted teeth.
Shuiyue Gallery - Wen Lingyi: "Give me a chance to explain, okay?"
The next second, a glaring red exclamation mark suddenly popped up.
Zhou Jianxing didn't give her any chance to explain, nor did he even reprimand her. He just blocked her.
It’s hard to say whether she is sad or upset. Wen Lingyi feels like a fish in the deep sea, suffocated by the coldness all around her.
The love I first fell in love with has cooled down, but hers is still boiling.
She dialed Zhou Jianxing's number, but she didn't feel nervous or anxious as she pressed the dial button.
Because she had already rehearsed in her mind that Zhou Jianxing would hang up the phone without mercy, just like she did before, and then put her number on the blacklist.
Then why did she make this call?
Just like people who know that the probability of winning is almost zero, but still can't help buying lottery tickets again and again, always holding on to that one in ten million chance, and even start to control the money that may belong to them in their imagination.
Even if there was only a slight possibility, she couldn't help but fantasize about it. What if?
What if Zhou Jianxing still has even a little bit of softness towards her?
But this fantasy is like a bubble in the sun, which will burst at the slightest touch.
The waiting tone coming from the mobile phone receiver was long and monotonous, and each "beep" hit Wen Lingyi's tense nerves.
During this long wait, she went from initially feeling lucky to gradually facing reality, and finally, she was almost able to calmly accept the rejection.
Just as she was about to hang up and end this futile act of self-torture, the waiting tone suddenly stopped.
The phone was connected.
There was silence in the receiver, with only the slight sound of electricity proving the connection.
The other party did not speak, and the silence seemed to have a real weight, pressing on Wen Lingyi's heart.
"Zhou Jianxing." She called softly.
The moment these three words came out of her mouth, Wen Lingyi's eyes became hot uncontrollably, and a faint red stained her eyes.
Her breathing was unstable and her voice was trembling. Was it because of joy, or was it because of anxiety?
"I was wrong." She took a breath and almost whispered the following words, "I still love you."
There was still a disturbing silence on the other end of the receiver. Only the faint sound of breathing could be heard through the radio waves, proving that the person on the other end was still listening.
"Would you please listen to my explanation?" Wen Lingyi's lips began to tremble and a thin layer of sweat oozed out of her palms.
When the call actually went through, it caught her off guard. All the words that had been swirling in her mind instantly became a mess.
She regretted not having made a good preparation while waiting.
"Mrs. Wen," Zhou Jianxing's voice finally rang out. It was somewhat distorted by the current and was flat, without any emotional fluctuations. "You don't have to explain anything to me."
This name... Wen Lingyi opened her mouth, but no sound came out.
"I've let it go." There was a pause on the other end of the line, as if someone took a deep breath, or perhaps it was just the noise of electricity. "Let's all move forward."
After he finished speaking, before Wen Lingyi could respond, a crisp busy tone came from the receiver.
Wen Lingyi subconsciously redialed, but this time, the only response she got was the cold system prompt tone, informing her that the user she dialed could not be connected.
Zhou Jianxing's actions were decisive and quick, cutting off all possibilities for her to make detours.
One person is already talking about moving forward with ease, while the other is nailed to the past and unable to move.
Wen Lingyi held the phone, frozen in place, like a puppet with its soul sucked out.
The rain in my heart is still falling, leaving winding water marks, just like the tears silently sliding down Zhou Jianxing's face.
Although her tears had dried up long ago, they were still imprinted in her heart and could not be wiped away or forgotten.
The burning flame in her heart was completely extinguished by Zhou Jianxing's last calm and cold words, leaving only a handful of damp and cold ashes, weighing heavily on her heart.
The busy tone on the phone had long stopped, but the mechanical female voice still seemed to echo in her ears, like a blunt saw, slowly and repeatedly pulling at the softest flesh in her chest, bringing waves of long and deep dull pain.
Zhou Jianxing has let it go.
The pain brought by this realization was so sharp and clear that Wen Lingyi almost bent over.
How could she hold on and keep moving forward as if nothing had happened?
Maybe Zhou Jianxing has really gone far away.
Walk to a street corner with no memories, walk to a traffic light that will not stop for anyone, leaving only a sharp back, cutting off all possibilities of looking back.
It turns out that regret is such a thing.
·
After breaking up with Zhou Jianxing, Wen Lingyi simply uninstalled the blue social software with a winking logo.
She remembered that message prompts from that familiar avatar kept popping up in the notification bar, but she didn't click on any of them. She just swiped them away in annoyance and chose to uninstall, as if clearing away a dark history that she didn't want to look back on.
At this moment, an almost absurd idea came to my mind.
If... if I use that virtual identity to talk to Zhou Jianxing, can I remove all of his defenses and concerns?
Could Zhou Jianxing say to her, to the former "tree hole", things that he wouldn't say to "Wen Lingyi"?
She re-downloaded the software and entered her account password with trembling fingers.
After logging in successfully, I clicked on the long-dormant dialog box marked "Star." The historical messages instantly flooded into my view.
Xingxing: "Sister, she broke up with me..."
Xingxing: "She said she never liked me..."
Xingxing: "I'm so sad I'm dying"
…
Xingxing: "I will never like her again"
…
Xingxing: "Sister, I won't use this software anymore."
Xingxing: "Thank you for always listening"
Star: "I wish you happiness"
Star: "Goodbye!"
The last message was several months ago, and there has been no news since then.
The system prompts that the other party’s account has been cancelled.
A sense of loss washed over him. Even this last circuitous route was completely blocked.
The "stars" became dim, but Wen Lingyi's closed heart was opened, and the locked love overflowed.
Can I... start over again?
·
After lingering on the dialing interface for a long time, Wen Lingyi finally dialed the official customer service number of Schindler Maintenance.
The formulaic ringtone music came from the receiver.
"Hello, this is Schindler Maintenance. How can I help you?" came the sweet voice of the customer service lady.
Wen Lingyi lowered her eyelashes, her unfocused gaze falling on the smooth table, her eyelashes trembling slightly.
She was silent for a few seconds, as if she was preparing herself mentally, before she spoke.
"Hello. This is Building A7 of Lanyue Bay. There is a problem with the smart door lock. Please send a technician to come and inspect it." She tried to keep her voice steady.
After a pause, her fingertips unconsciously scratching the edge of the table, she added, her tone sounding casual, "I remember you have a Master Zhou here, Zhou Jianxing. She came to help me with a problem before. She's very skilled and patient in her service."
"If it's convenient for her, please ask her to come over this time."
·
When Zhou Jianxing received the internal call, he was hunched over his workstation, frowning as he studied a thick guide to repairing smart home appliances.
When she heard Zhang Li at the front desk say that Ms. Wen from Lanyuewan A7 asked her to come for on-site repairs, her fingers holding the pages of the book suddenly tightened, and deep creases were instantly left on the edges of the paper.
Her eyes were still fixed on the densely packed circuit diagrams and professional terms, but the words seemed to suddenly come alive, turning into a group of disorganized ants crawling around in front of her eyes, and she couldn't read a single word.
My mood was like a pot of porridge that was suddenly heated on a high fire. The sadness and grievance that had just sunk to the bottom because of Wen Lingyi's two WeChat messages were suddenly stirred up and began to boil.
The wounds that she thought had barely scabbed over were roughly reopened.
The short phone call that followed was more like a spoon, stirring up all the sticky and lingering thoughts in my heart and mixing them into a mess.
They were all bubbling so fast that her heart ached.
"Xiao Zhang." Zhou Jianxing reached out and slowly smoothed out the page of the book that she had crumpled. Her voice sounded unusually calm.
"Please reply to Mrs. Wen. I have another urgent appointment and cannot be available for the time being. Please ask her to contact another master, or the company to arrange for a skilled master to come over."
Zhang Li on the other end of the phone was stunned for a moment, and her voice rose slightly: "No, Mr. Zhou, this Ms. Wen clearly asked you to come over."
"If it's not convenient for you now, when can you be free? I can coordinate the time with the client."
The sound of rapid keyboard tapping came from the receiver.
"Huh? That's weird. The system shows you don't have any appointments this afternoon? And I saw that Ms. Wen from Lanyue Bay took all the orders, didn't you?"
·
Not long after, the internal phone on Zhou Jianxing's desk rang again. It was Huang Haifu who called directly and asked her in a bad tone to go to the office.
"Xiao Zhou, what's wrong with you?" Huang Haifu sat behind his large desk, tapping the surface with his fingers, his brows furrowed. "The front desk said that the important client of Lanyue Bay, Ms. Wen, specifically asked for you to have sex, and you turned it down?"
He looked at Zhou Jianxing's lowered head and asked, "Do you have any problems with this client?"
"No." Zhou Jianxing's gaze fell on the dried and blackened oil stain on the tip of his shoe, and his voice was muffled.
"No?" Huang Haifu raised his voice, his displeasure evident. "Why didn't you go if no one specifically asked you to? Have you become more capable? Are you starting to pick your clients?"
"I'm not picky about clients." Zhou Jianxing's answer was still brief, and he resisted passively.
"If you don't want to, just go over there honestly!" Huang Haifu rubbed his temples, feeling a headache. "The call came directly to me! What nonsense!"
His tone became more serious. "Also, you must answer customer calls from now on! If I catch you missing a customer call again, I'll deduct fifty cents from your bank account! Do you understand?"
Wen Lingyi's call just now came directly to his cell phone.
There was no emotion in his tone. He just calmly asked why there was no response after he made an appointment with Zhou Jianxing to come to his house, and why Zhou Jianxing himself was not answered by phone.
The last sentence, "I know a lot of friends in the media. Your company shouldn't bully customers because of its size, right?" was said lightly, but it made him feel a chill down his spine for some reason.
"Okay, boss." Zhou Jianxing agreed obediently.
I just suddenly felt that the molar on the right side, which had been decayed because of my love for sweets and later filled, started to ache again.
She carefully touched the filling of the tooth with the tip of her tongue and whispered, "I'll be there."
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