You are still young
Although she had already heard Sima Yan's reasons for refusing her, she still froze and her expression became blank when he told her the reasons in person.
Shangguan Jin said as gently as possible, “If you only want to stand among the strong, your ancestral heavy sword technique is more than enough. With diligent practice, you may well become a king in the way of the sword. You... don’t need to go to great lengths to change your ways. The Shangguan family’s sword technique is a hidden art within our family’s learning. We have no intention of leaving a name in the world. Those who study it must completely abandon themselves and give up all fame and power. I don’t think this is suitable for Princess Langya.”
This time she understood.
The first part of the sentence was an advice to her to study and promote the Sima family's martial arts, so that even if she could not see the way of heaven, she could still become a martial arts master.
The latter half tells her that the Shangguan family's secret teachings are treasured by generations of inheritors and are not something a spoiled, arrogant girl like her, raised in wealth and privilege, can play with and appreciate for a moment.
It requires a lifetime of diligent practice, frugality, and virtue to cultivate, refine, and achieve.
What Shangguan Jin didn't know was that it was his last sentence that ignited a wildfire in her heart.
She seemed to have finally found a signpost to guide her existence in the desert of life.
A practitioner of swordsmanship should be like this.
The many mixed and disordered thoughts that had been swirling in those long nights, the uncertainty and helplessness about the future, suddenly became clear and bright, like beads on a string.
She didn't want to follow any path that anyone had taken before.
She didn't want to marry into a powerful family like her mother, nor did she want to go to Youzhou for a political marriage. She was tired of the backyard politics and the petty squabbles of the court.
At that moment, she was absolutely certain that the path Shangguan Jin had pointed out to her was the path she had always longed for.
She heard her voice no longer tremble and clearly asked, "If I become a member of the Shangguan family, will I be able to learn the Shangguan family's swordsmanship?"
Even Shangguan Jin's usually calm and composed expression changed.
His eyes could no longer remain calm.
She? Become a member of the Shangguan family? How will she do that?
After a moment of silence, Sima Yao heard Shangguan Jin's calm voice say, "A Yao."
She replied softly, "Ayao is here."
Shangguan Jin continued, "The successors of the Shangguan family's swordsmanship are known within the family as tomb guardians. They spend their entire lives cultivating in forbidden areas, never to leave the world, and are forbidden from marrying, and are destined to have no children or descendants."
Sima Yao looked up at him in surprise.
Shangguan Jin seemed to understand what she was going to say and said, "I broke the rules. The late emperor made an exception and summoned me from the tomb by imperial edict. Many people know about this story. But apart from the rule that I cannot be born, I have strictly adhered to the family's rules for tomb keepers."
Something seemed to be churning in her mind, confusing her, as if she didn't understand what he was saying.
But at the same time, I feel that he has already explained it very clearly.
She blinked hard, still staring blankly at him, looking completely bewildered.
Shangguan Jin's voice softened slightly.
"You are still young. Even if you don't practice swordsmanship, there are still many things you can do in life. You don't have to go down this path just because you're curious."
For a long time afterward, she racked her brains trying to figure out how to make Shangguan Jin understand that her feelings were not just a passing fancy, nor were they driven by a sense of novelty or curiosity.
This was even after she entered the forbidden area.
On that rainy night, after Shangguan Jin said his last words, he did not try to keep her any longer. She waited until the rain subsided a little before getting up and leaving.
As she left, she had only one thought in her mind: she must become a member of the Shangguan family.
The brief moment she spent in Shangguan Jin's study that night was a glimpse into a world she could never have crossed paths with, but it only strengthened her resolve.
If we let go from here, we will be on different paths in this world.
When she had thought it over carefully and asked her father to let her marry into the Shangguan family, Sima Jun's wine cup suddenly stopped in mid-air.
"What did you say? You married into the Shangguan family?" His usually handsome brows suddenly furrowed, his gaze flickering as it swept over her face repeatedly.
That wasn't a rejection, but rather a weighing of possibilities.
Even the mother, who was at the other end of the long table, put down her chopsticks and bowl, and suddenly seemed to perk up.
A maidservant nearby hurriedly handed her a handkerchief. After wiping her hands, she couldn't help but speak up: "Although Shangguan Jin is older, fortunately he has never had a wife. Yao Yao was his first wife in the past, so this marriage doesn't seem like it's impossible."
Shangguan Jin held an extremely high and powerful position, truly second only to the emperor. Behind him was the Shangguan family, the foremost clan in Jiangzuo, a century-old family of upright officials. Any family, even the imperial family, would be eager to form a marriage alliance with Shangguan Jin.
Sima Jun scoffed, his gaze fixed on Sima Yao without wavering, and said coldly, "Who do you take Shangguan Jin for! If he were willing to marry, he would have married twenty years ago. Would he still be a widow now? You're just a woman, so short-sighted!"
Princess Sima retorted sarcastically, "Don't you understand what 'times change' means? Back then, Shangguan Jin vowed to remain celibate, and perhaps he still wanted to return to his grave. But after so many years of navigating the court, his official position has risen higher and higher, and his power has grown stronger. It seems he'll never be able to return to his grave in this lifetime. If you were him, wouldn't you want to leave an heir?"
This left Sima Jun speechless. Surprisingly, he didn't get angry as usual. Instead, he looked at Sima Yao again before saying, "This is very difficult. He even refused to take you as his apprentice because of the rules for tomb keepers. Asking him to marry you would be even more against the rules and an exception."
He paused for a moment, then said, "Even if we ask your elder brother and the retired emperor to speak on this matter, I'm afraid it will be difficult to succeed."
Sima Yao was already mentally prepared, and immediately knelt down on her seat, saying, "So, even though this matter is difficult to handle, Father and Mother do not object to my marriage into the Shangguan family?"
Sima Jun sighed and personally helped her up, saying, "If it could be done, your mother and I would naturally have no objections. But the Shangguan family is so difficult to enter. There is only one Shangguan... Miss Shangguan, and it was only after the Emperor Emeritus begged and pleaded with Shangguan Jin that she was able to marry into the Shangguan family. Although you are currently the most honored woman in Dahuan, it will probably not be easy for you to marry into the Shangguan family."
He added with concern, "Moreover, if this proposal is brought up again and Shangguan Jin refuses, it won't be as simple as him refusing to take you as a disciple. You will become a laughing stock among the Jianzhang elites who are unable to curry favor with Shangguan Jin, and it will be even more difficult to arrange a marriage in the future."
Princess Langya interjected, "If that's the case, why don't I go and visit the women of the Shangguan family first, to spread the word and test the waters, and find out who the current head of the Shangguan family is?"
Sima Jun's face darkened as soon as he heard the princess speak.
He patiently said, "I've heard that the current head of the Shangguan family is the future Empress, our betrothed nephew's wife, Shangguan Yanxiu. I wonder if you would like to ask her in person about her uncle's marriage?"
Princess Langya's face turned ashen after being repeatedly rebuked. With a "clatter," she swept a large pile of bowls and plates off the table, stood up, and said, "I'm not going to get involved in your affairs anymore!" Then she went straight into the inner courtyard.
Sima Jun had no time to argue with the princess, and only hesitated before saying, "If it can be accomplished, that would be wonderful. But there is no proper way."
Sima Yao refused to get up and said loudly, "Father, you are wise. I only said that I wanted to marry into the Shangguan family, not that I wanted to marry the Grand Secretary."
She paused for a moment, then said, "As Father said, the Grand Secretary has kept his vow of celibacy for nearly twenty years, and he will not make an exception."
Sima Jun's expression changed upon hearing this, and he asked suspiciously, "If you don't want to marry Shangguan Jin, who do you want to marry?"
He then said decisively, "In the Shangguan family today, there is only one person, Shangguan Jin, who holds a high position and wields great power. He dominates the overall situation, and even His Majesty has to give him some leeway. Even the virtuous ministers who have emerged from the Shangguan family throughout the ages cannot match his reputation and prestige."
He shook his head again and said, "Apart from this person, I don't think anyone else needs to be married off."
Sima Yao had made up her mind and had a clear idea of her future. Her father's reaction was exactly what she expected.
With just four words, she shattered all of her father's expectations of his future son-in-law.
She calmly replied, "I don't care."
Sima Jun stared at her, coldly asking, "What did you say?"
Sima Yao said casually, "I don't care who from the Shangguan family marries me. I just need a marriage certificate so that I can become a member of the Shangguan family, and then I can enter the forbidden area to practice the Shangguan family's sword techniques."
Having finally spoken her mind, she felt a sense of relief.
She said softly, "Otherwise, I originally planned to practice swordsmanship for the rest of my life and never get married."
Sima Jun stared at her, his gaze shifting from anger to disbelief, and finally to disappointment. In a hoarse voice, he said, "So, this is what you really wanted. You still want to learn Shangguan Jin's swordsmanship! He refused because you weren't a member of the Shangguan family, so you tried every means to become one!"
Sima Yao said, "I have no way to refute this, but I have no other choice."
Sima Jun said coldly, "You've thought it through very well, very cleverly! But you haven't considered that as my daughter, you've enjoyed all the wealth and glory of the Langya Prince's lineage throughout your life, yet you haven't considered the obligations you owe me!"
Sima Yao, who was kneeling, stood up upon hearing this and said calmly, "The obligation Father spoke of is that I should strive for more power for you and arrange marriages with more powerful families, right? Let alone that I don't have such ability, even if I did, do you think His Majesty would really tolerate such a thing? You... have no children, so what use is that immense power to you?"
Sima Jun was caught off guard by his daughter's audacity in revealing his thoughts, and in doing so, touched upon the very thing he hated most in his life. He grew even angrier and said coldly, "If your mother hadn't been so incompetent, how could I have been childless!"
He took another step closer, his voice even colder: "Ayao, this is also what I want to say to you. Your mother is childless and jealous, yet she is still able to be a proper princess in the inner palace. Half the credit goes to her family, and the other half goes to your prestige in front of His Majesty."
Sima Yao felt as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over her head, and she said blankly, "What does Father mean?"
Sima Jun said coldly, "Although I have no sons, you are the Princess of Langya, bestowed by His Majesty. Within the Southern Dynasty, your honor and favor are comparable to that of a princess. Even if you never marry, His Majesty will grant you the same honor and power as a princess. This is why I have not made things difficult for your mother and have repeatedly tolerated her. But if you continue to act recklessly, disappointing His Majesty and causing you to lose this honor,"
He paused, then said coldly, "Do you really think I would allow your mother to sit comfortably in the position of Princess of Langya day after day, doing more harm than good?"
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