Chapter 436 Confession (Fourth Update)
When Princess Xinyang decided to raise him, he was just an infant in swaddling clothes, so naturally he couldn't have heard her say those words to him directly. Princess Xinyang told him about them herself later.
"I see," Gu Jiao said. "Then, does Marquis Xuanping know?"
Xiao Liulang lowered his eyes: "I know. It was he who covered things up, making Princess Xinyang mistakenly believe that her son and that female slave were captured and tortured by assassins. It wasn't until four years ago that she learned the truth by chance—that she had raised the son of the person who killed her son for fourteen years."
After that, Princess Xinyang broke down.
She never forgot that son, and she never treated Xiao Liulang as a substitute for anyone else. She truly raised Xiao Liulang as another son.
She devoted herself to teaching him and poured all her heart and soul into raising him into the most outstanding young marquis in Zhaodu.
That's why she couldn't bear the blow of the truth.
The female slave is dead, so I have no choice but to kill your son!
This is her inner demon, and all her evil.
“I was the last to know,” Xiao Liulang said calmly.
He appeared calm, but whether he was truly at peace inside is unknown.
Gu Jiao paused: "So the fire four years ago..."
Xiao Liulang nodded: "She wanted to kill me, to die with me. Unfortunately, something went wrong, and I wasn't the one who was burned to death. Later, Long Yi arrived and rescued her."
He didn't say what went wrong, but Gu Jiao thought it must be related to the real Xiao Liulang.
He once told her, "If I am not the person you think I am," and she thought he was referring to Xiao Liulang, but it turned out he was referring to Xiao Heng.
Suppressing the immense pain in his heart, he said, "Sometimes I wonder, why wasn't I the one who died back then? Why did I survive? How many lives do I have to carry on my shoulders? A person like me... a person as filthy as me!"
Gu Jiao gently took his hand.
"My lord, you are not dirty."
"Also, it's not your fault."
The night was cool and still.
The residences on Zhuque Avenue were quiet and peaceful.
Princess Xinyang woke up, and Yu Jin brought in a basin of hot water, asking her, "How are you feeling, Princess?"
Princess Xinyang sat on the edge of the bed and asked calmly, "Did I faint again just now?"
Yu Jin said with lingering fear, "Yes, luckily I fainted in bed, otherwise I would have bumped into something and gotten hurt."
Once, Princess Xinyang fainted by the lake. Coincidentally, Long Yi was out on business, and Yu Jin couldn't hold her back, so they both fell into the lake.
Princess Xinyang looked at the new needle marks on her elbow and guessed that Gu Jiao had been there: "That girl has given me something strange again?"
Yu Jin smiled and said, "It's all thanks to Doctor Gu."
Princess Xinyang muttered, "I wonder where she learned those strange skills?"
Yu Jin helped Princess Xinyang wash her face, then brought out the pills left by Gu Jiao and poured her a glass of warm water: "Doctor Gu said that from today onwards, she should take an additional medicine."
"Hmm." Princess Xinyang didn't object; it wasn't bitter anyway, so she would eat it.
Princess Xinyang was a little hungry after taking the medicine.
Yu Jin brought over a bowl of millet porridge and moved a small tea table to the bed: "Before Doctor Gu left, he instructed the kitchen to cook some millet porridge, saying that the princess should eat some when she wakes up, and that her diet should be light for the next few days."
Princess Xinyang scooped up a spoonful of millet porridge: "You keep calling me Doctor Gu, have you fallen for her tricks or are you under her spell?"
Yu Jin smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed.
Princess Xinyang ate a few mouthfuls of porridge but didn't want to eat anymore; she still had little appetite.
Yu Jin advised, "Eat some more."
Princess Xinyang turned her face away: "I'm not eating."
Yu Jin pushed the bowl towards her: "Eat five more bites."
"...Sigh, you."
Princess Xinyang had no choice but to force herself to eat some more.
After finishing her meal, seeing that Yu Jin wasn't leaving, she asked, "What's wrong? Is there something else?"
Yu Jin hesitated for a moment, then finally mustered her courage and asked, "Princess, do you really... hate the young marquis that much?"
Princess Xinyang's expression softened: "Why bring him up?"
Yu Jin said, "Your mood has been off ever since you left the clinic. He's living like this, unable to see the light of day, which is worse than death. If you truly hate him, Princess, you should be delighted to see him in this state. But you fainted from grief. Princess, you... you do care for the young marquis, don't you?"
"You're talking nonsense again," Princess Xinyang said, haphazardly scooping up another spoonful of millet porridge and stuffing it into her mouth.
Yu Jin had served her for many years, so how could she not know her personality? The fact that she ate even though she didn't want to meant that her secret had been exposed.
Yu Jin said with a heavy heart, "I'm not lying. The fire back then wasn't started by the princess at all. The princess softened at the critical moment. In fact, the princess has never been able to sever her mother-son bond with the young marquis. If that's the case, why doesn't the princess acknowledge the young marquis? What happened back then wasn't his fault. He was just an innocent child. What happened back then wasn't the princess's negligence either. The princess shouldn't torment the young marquis anymore, and she shouldn't torment herself anymore!"
Princess Xinyang's expression was complicated.
She opened her mouth, hesitated, then gently put down the spoon in her hand, and said thoughtfully, "The arsonist was someone else, but I've never been able to find out who it was. And..."
"What else?" Yu Jin asked Princess Xinyang.
Princess Xinyang sighed and said softly, "Never mind, it's nothing."
The group returned to Bishui Hutong, and Xiao Sanzi drove the carriage back to the clinic.
Gu Jiao picked up the sleeping Xiao Jingkong and gave Xiao Liulang no chance to refuse. Xiao Liulang looked at his hand wrapped in gauze, then at his powerless right foot, and a look of disgust flashed between his brows.
Self-loathing.
Xiao Jingkong got covered in mud from playing, so Gu Jiao put a mat on the bed, laid him on it, and then went to the kitchen to fetch hot water.
“I’ll do it,” Xiao Liulang said.
As for bathing, Gu Jiao had never done it for the little guy since he came down from the mountain. Either Xiao Liulang, Gu Xiaoshun, or Gu Yan would bathe him.
"Okay." Gu Jiao used her foot to hook the stool over and put the basin of water and towel down.
Xiao Liulang turned Xiao Jingkong over and over, wiping his body and changing his clothes, but Xiao Jingkong didn't wake up at all.
Gu Jiao leaned against the wardrobe with her arms crossed, lazily raising an eyebrow: "What did he do today? He looks so tired."
—He and Long Yi went to cause trouble for Princess Xinyang's flower.
Xiao Liulang didn't say that.
After washing Xiao Jingkong, Xiao Liulang went to pour water, but Gu Jiao took the basin from him.
These are trivial matters in life, but when there are many trivial matters, they become significant. He went from being indifferent at first to gradually being unable to ignore them.
He once didn't care about his life or his disability, because he believed that all his sins deserved him to live in purgatory.
But what did she do wrong? Why did she have to encounter such a wretched version of herself?
He once deluded himself into believing that as long as he tried his best, perhaps they could truly live a peaceful and happy life together.
But when the truth was finally revealed and all his secrets were exposed, it was as if all the paperwork had been torn away, and he realized that all his efforts were so vulnerable.
He was the son of the lowest of female slaves, his blood was lowly and filthy, his birth was a sin, his life was a sin, and he stood on the bones of his own brothers. He was not worthy of touching anything beautiful.
Lord Gu is right, he is not good enough for her, and someone like him should stay far away from her.
Xiao Liulang sat in the house for a while, but instead of hearing her return to the east room to rest, he heard a series of sounds coming from the courtyard.
It's so late, everyone's asleep, why isn't she going to sleep? What's she doing making a fuss in the yard?
Xiao Liulang wanted to go see it, but then felt he shouldn't.
Now that he's decided to let go, whatever she does is none of his business anymore.
She's still young. One day she'll understand that there are many good men in the world, and that she was just the one she shouldn't have met.
He closed his eyes, trying to harden his heart, but he couldn't ignore the commotion in the yard.
So be it.
We'll have to say goodbye sooner or later, so there's no better time than now.
"Waaah~" Little Jingkong murmured in his sleep on the bed and kicked off the blanket.
Xiao Liulang went over, pulled the blanket up for him, and tucked the corners of the blanket in.
After that, he left the house and followed the sound to the backyard.
The scene before him left him completely stunned.
Under the cool moonlight, in the desolate courtyard, she was alone, bending over and stepping on a stone bench to chop wood.
She's taller than she was two years ago, but she's still a woman and looks quite slender.
Perhaps not wanting to wake her family, her movements appeared very light, but in reality, they were quite forceful, much more strenuous than simply logging.
In just a few moments, fine beads of sweat had appeared on her forehead.
Xiao Liulang walked over and asked in confusion, "What are you doing?"
"Did I disturb you?" Gu Jiao asked him.
Xiao Liulang shook his head: "No, I haven't gone to sleep yet."
After saying that, his gaze fell on her saw and the wood.
Gu Jiao smiled and said, "You lost your cane, I'll make you a new one."
(End of this chapter)
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