Imprisoned 2
Since the day Shen Huaijin met Ling Wan, he would come to the villa every three days.
Xu Lingwan ignored him and treated him as air; he didn't get angry, but just stayed with her quietly.
Because the time of his arrival was irregular, sometimes when the weather was fine, the person who handed Ling Wan the brush while she was painting would change from Chuxiu to him; sometimes when it rained, Ling Wan would lean against the window to read a book and listen to the rain, and the person who would replace the bouquet of golden osmanthus in the vase in the house would also be him.
Sometimes he would arrive late and catch Ling Wan having dinner, so he would sit opposite her and watch her eat in silence.
Xu Lingwan hadn't had much contact with Shen Huaijin, and knew him even less. But every time she saw him arrive, dusty and exhausted, sometimes only staying for half an hour before leaving again, regardless of weather, she began to think that being loved by Shen Huaijin (besides her) wasn't bad.
There is no sun or moon in the mountains. At first, Chen Yuanyuan remembered the days she was imprisoned, but later, when Chen Cong had not yet come, she no longer remembered.
Her belly also grew bigger and bigger. She and Shen Huaijin had not spoken since that day, but as her body grew heavier, his gaze towards her took on a look that Xu Lingwan could not understand.
Calm, yet complex. Occasionally, he would stare at her belly, lost in thought.
Now was the real situation where he was the knife and she was the fish. Ling Wan didn't bother to care. She knew Shen Huaijin wouldn't do anything to her now, so these days were the days when she could really relax and do nothing since she came here.
Shen Huaijin came early that day, and she had just woken up from her nap.
I walked out of the bedroom in a daze, and saw a familiar figure sitting under the long window behind the screen.
Xu Lingwan was still half asleep at the time, and when she saw this figure, her eyes immediately turned red and she shouted, "Chen Cong."
Her voice was filled with tears and the hoarseness of deep sleep, and she felt extremely aggrieved and lingering.
The figure was shocked, and then Shen Huaijin turned around with an angry look on his face.
After seeing what was happening, Ling Wan hurriedly turned her face away, trying to suppress the tears in her eyes. However, Shen Huaijin did not let her go. Seeing that she tried to run, he grabbed her wrist in an instant, and the anger in his dark eyes intensified.
Slap! Ling Wan raised her hand and slapped him, saying coldly, "Let go."
Shen Huaijin had never been beaten like this before, and his eyes were filled with rage. In addition, he was holding the white wrist that he had been thinking about day and night, and the beast of desire in his heart almost broke free from its cage.
But he finally let go because he saw Xu Lingwan crying: she pursed her lips and let the tears fall coldly.
He let go of Xu Lingwan, half lowered his eyes, stood there for a while with his head bowed, said nothing, and left.
When he came out of the cave to help Xu Lingwan rest in the evening, he discovered a circle of bruises on her wrist.
Chu Xiu used sign language and anxiously asked her what happened and where the bruise on her wrist came from. Then he came over to check if there were any similar scars on Ling Wan's other parts of her body.
Ling Wan pulled down her sleeves and said lightly, "It's okay."
Chu Xiu, however, seemed very scared and nervous, and insisted on asking.
Ling Wan glanced at her and said casually, "It was just an accident, don't worry about it." But Chu Xiu immediately knelt down and trembled on the ground when she heard it.
Ling Wan was deeply puzzled by this strange behavior. She asked Chu Xiu to get up, but Chu Xiu refused. Only after Ling Wan said she was fine and asked her to confirm that it was only a bruise on her wrist did she feel relieved.
Ling Wan was surprised and asked Chu Xiu why she was so nervous and afraid. Chu Xiu didn't dare to say anything. It wasn't until Ling Wan played the villain and threatened that if she didn't tell her, she would go directly to Chen Huai Jin that Chu Xiu trembled and gestured to explain.
"The master said that if we don't take good care of you and you dare to get hurt in the slightest, we servants will pay with our lives." Chuxiu didn't dare to look at Ling Wan, and she was trembling while gesturing.
No wonder the three maids followed her wherever she went. It turned out they were afraid that she would do something bad.
Shen Huaijin not only threatened her with the red moon and green clouds, but also threatened her with the innocent people who took care of her.
She considered him a young man by modern standards. But he was no young man at all; he was clearly a killing god.
Ling Wan was so angry that she cursed Chen Cong again in her heart, "A dragon gives birth to a dragon, and a phoenix gives birth to a phoenix. Chen Huaijin is so ruthless, how can I be a good person!"
When Xu Lingwan thought of the man with the icy face, bitterness welled up in her heart.
From a rational and practical point of view, she shouldn't miss him. She had been missing for so many days, so his fate with her should have ended long ago.
Even if Chen Cong found her, between the options of the eldest son and the second wife, Chen Yuanyuan didn't think he would choose her. Moreover, Shen Huaijin had such thoughts about her. How could such a proud and lonely Shen Xiang tolerate her living in this world?
"Huai Jin." Three days later, Shen Huai Jin came to the villa as scheduled. In his hand, he held a few lotus flowers cut from the foot of the mountain, with a delicate fragrance.
This was the first time Ling Wan had spoken to him in all those days. His eyes flushed red as he placed the most vibrant lotus in the pond into a jade vase and uttered a faint "hmm."
"How long do you plan to keep me locked up here?" A light rain had just fallen in the mountains, and the air was fresh and moist, and Ling Wan's voice seemed to be tinged with moisture.
"We'll go down the mountain when the search is less strict." The young man raised his two eyelashes, which were as light as fluff and fluttered.
Oh. Is Chen Cong still looking for her? Ling Wan's nose felt sore and she turned away.
What difference does it make if we find her? So much time has passed. Even if she is found, she can't wash herself clean even if she jumps into the Yellow River.
Rather than returning to the Shen family and enduring all kinds of speculation, and being caught between the father and son, it would be better to take this opportunity to leave. There is a big world out there, and there is always a place for her to stay.
"Please let me go. I won't go back to the Shen family." Ling Wan rarely smiled at him. She was so beautiful that it seemed as if a pond full of red lotuses was at the foot of a mountain.
Shen Huaijin paused. He had imagined Xu Lingwan smiling at him a thousand times, but he had never expected that the first time she smiled at him, it would be so sad.
"Why?" He didn't know why he asked. Maybe he wanted to hear more of her words, or maybe he was just grateful for her initiative.
Chen Yuanyuan glanced at him, her eyes shifting to the delicate lotus in his hand, and finally to a spot outside the window. After a long pause, she opened her lips and said, "To be honest, I've wanted to leave the Shen family for a long time."
"Most of the Shen family are nice, but there are so many of them. I have to be a daughter-in-law who dresses beautifully to entertain her parents, a kind and amiable sister-in-law, and a tolerant and generous mother. You don't know how much I've been annoyed in the past two years."
"Especially on your father's inner court."
"Actually, I'm not a very generous or virtuous person. Sometimes, when I look at the Zhao and Qiu families, I really want them to get lost, as far away as possible."
"But I can only think that way in my heart, because they are Tang Jie'er and Huai'an's biological mothers. No matter how much I hate them, I have to do it for the sake of the children and not make things difficult for them."
"The same goes for the children from the second wife. Your Sixth Aunt is always curious about why I treat you stepchildren so well."
"To be honest, if there were other options, who would have the time to worry about other people's children? All I did was do my job and live up to my position."
"Now that I can no longer be Mrs. Shen, I naturally feel relieved." Ling Wan smiled sincerely, her eyes shining. "My dream since I was a child has been to read thousands of books and travel thousands of miles."
"There are so many beautiful mountains and rivers outside. I want to go and take a look."
“I have a lot of places I want to go.”
"I want to follow the salt merchants along the ancient Tea-Horse Road and see how this path, carved out of the mountains by foot, is truly as steep and treacherous as described in books. I also want to follow the Hu merchants to the Western Regions and experience the diverse cultures and customs of the region. Crossing the desert, the sight of 'lonely smoke rising high above the long river, the setting sun' must be incredibly magnificent."
"I'd rather travel along the ancient Grand Canal from Suzhou to Yangzhou in the month of fireworks in March. Small bridges and flowing water, misty rain in the south of the Yangtze River. Before I got married, I lived in seclusion, and after I got married, I lived in the inner chambers. I've never even truly experienced the willows covered in smoke in early spring."
As Chen Yuanyuan spoke, a smile of joy at her freedom spread across her face. "I want to experience the four seasons, the hustle and bustle of life here."
Now that Xu Lingwan's responsibilities and obligations had come to an end, she could now freely experience the joy of being in this world. There were so many delicious, fun, and beautiful things to see and do; once she was free, she could set out to explore them.
"You——" Perhaps the look on Xu Lingwan's face was too charming, and Shen Huaijin didn't feel angry when he heard her unrestrained yearning.
He had just made it clear that his father was still looking for her, but she had never mentioned Chen Cong in front of him, whether since she came here or now.
"Do you want to abandon him?" Shen Huaijin didn't know why, compared to Xu Lingwan's unspoken love for his father, her active act of abandoning his father made him more heartbroken and helpless.
"If you let me go, in a sense, I am choosing not to have him." The fire in Ling Wan's eyes gradually died down, and her smile became a little pale.
"Why? Don't you have any feelings for him?" Shen Huaijin didn't know why, and felt an unbearable pain in his heart. He vaguely realized that if he wanted to keep Xu Lingwan by his side, it would be harder than climbing to the sky.
"There are feelings." Ling Wan thought of that thin figure, and her eyelashes trembled slightly. After a while, when she looked up at Shen Huaijin again, her eyes were clear and firm, "But compared to the troubles he brought me, I choose to love myself more."
Human emotions are complex, and people have different perspectives on love.
Between her and Shen Cong, there are different values formed by thousands of years, and different personalities and spirits shaped by layers of time. As for their relationship, it is more like her compromising with ancient marriage and fulfilling the responsibilities and obligations of marriage rather than love.
She liked Chen Cong, but she cared more about her own feelings. Their marriage didn't even have basic monogamy, and she found it ridiculous for her to talk about love with him.
"Ling Wan, I won't bring you any trouble." Shen Huaijin pursed his lips, struggling to express himself, "I will only have you in this life, I——
"You can't even marry me properly." Chen Yuanyuan calmly said to him, "You are Chen Wangxi's legitimate son and Xu Lingwan's stepson. This will never change."
In fact, Chen Yuanyuan had sighed these days when she saw Shen Huaijin coming and going and how his face was filled with gentleness and joy because of her gentleness.
If the person the Shen family and Xu Lingwan married was Shen Huaijin, they would be a young couple, with one heart. No matter what the future holds, at least they would have the purest and most beautiful time as a young couple.
And for Chen Cong, those times were shared by him and Wang. She didn't have them.
Shen Huaijin lowered his eyelids completely, and his long eyelashes cast a faint shadow on his eyelids, as thin as a piece of moonlight.
"What will you do if I don't let you go?" Shen Huaijin trembled with heartache. After a long pause, when he raised his eyes again, he looked as cold and calm as usual.
"It's okay." Ling Wan curled her lips at him, "I don't have any trump cards."
Shen Huaijin stared at her without saying a word.
Xu Lingwan turned away and looked at the withered golden osmanthus in the room: "I can't do anything about it."
But I think I will wither away, just like it. Without freedom, I am either a canary or a bird without legs.
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