Chapter 30: In the Peace-Seeking Palace, Shang Xu and...
Inside the palace, Shang Xu and Yan Yize shared a room. The previous incident was still fresh in his mind, and coupled with the recent incident in the carriage, it made him somewhat uneasy.
Yan Yize sat opposite him, but he kept his head down the whole time, avoiding looking up at her. A faint sense of estrangement enveloped the two of them, and the scene in the carriage seemed to be just a fleeting moment.
Yan Yize pursed her lips and looked at him. Seeing that he kept his head down and seemed to be distancing himself from her, her mood, which had just improved, instantly plummeted again.
"Shang Xu," she said calmly, her dark, unfathomable eyes looking directly at him as she asked earnestly, "How can I make you forget what happened last time?"
She had been troubled by this question for several days, and after asking it, the heavy weight on her heart seemed to lighten considerably.
Yan Yize stared at him without blinking, his eyes reflecting the man's clear outline. Even though the man was right in front of him, it was as if an invisible chasm separated them. The man was right beside him, yet so far away.
She didn't like this feeling at all.
What happened last time was her fault, and she had been trying to make amends, but she couldn't find a way. She was really desperate, so she spoke frankly. Yan Yize had already made a promise in his heart that as long as he asked, he would do whatever it took to fulfill his request.
Upon hearing this, Shang Xu's emotions fluctuated, but she eventually calmed down. When she coldly mentioned divorce, she had already made her choice, hadn't she?
His head, which had been hanging low, moved. He slowly raised his head, blinked, and looked at her innocently. "Your Highness, I don't remember."
Yan Yize pursed her lips, her hands clenching into fists without her noticing. She was filled with mixed emotions. She had thought of many possible answers, but she never expected that he would so easily let the matter go.
Do you really not remember?
Even so, they both knew that the matter was not over. The previous incident was like a fallen tree, invisible yet firmly standing between them.
"What do you want?" Yan Yize paused for a moment, staring straight at him, and said to himself, "Gold and silver, or perhaps jewelry?"
Shang Xu pursed his lips, already understanding her intention. A thread of sadness rose from the bottom of his heart. He bit his lip, banishing the chaotic emotions in his heart, and looked at her with a complex and sorrowful gaze. How could she try to cover up the truth with money after saying they were getting a divorce? He couldn't do it, nor was he willing to.
"His Highness already gave it to me last time."
“I’ll accept it too.”
The implication is that maintaining the status quo is best.
Yan Yize's eyes were dark and brooding. She lowered her head, her expression unreadable. She was very annoyed to find out that Shang Xu was unwilling to mend their relationship after being rejected.
After a moment of silence, Yan Yize looked at him again, her lips pursed, her eyes filled with unspoken words, but she hesitated to speak. She moved her lips, but her pride got the better of her, and she swallowed the words that were about to come out.
She looked at him, as if an invisible cicada was chirping incessantly in her mind, disturbing her peace of mind. She turned around, almost as if fleeing, and hurriedly left with the words, "I'm going out for a walk."
Shang Xu remained silent, watching her departing figure before calmly withdrawing his gaze. He lowered his head, pursing his lips tightly. They were about to divorce, so why try to ease their relationship? Wasn't it better to just leave things as they were?
As night fell, Shang Xu sat by the candle, the white candle casting a warm yellow glow that illuminated his face. He looked exhausted, yawning occasionally, clearly very sleepy, but refusing to fall asleep.
After waiting a while longer, it was already very late at night. Shang Xu thought she wouldn't come back, so he got up, went to bed, and prepared to go to sleep. He was really tired after a day of riding in the carriage.
Shang Xu stood in front of the bed, took off his outer garment, and was about to untie the belt around his waist when he heard a sound coming from the doorway. Startled, he was instantly wide awake and hurriedly picked up the outer garment he had taken off and put it back on.
He had just finished dressing when Yan Yize walked in. Shang Xu turned around, looked at her, and sighed with regret. He thought he could finally sleep in the bed, but she had come back.
"Your Highness, you're back."
"Mmm." Yan Yize responded casually, but her gaze remained fixed on his face, scrutinizing him. After a long while, she asked softly, "Are you going to sleep?"
Shang Xu hesitated for a moment before nodding, "Yes."
After she finished speaking, the room fell silent once again. Shang Xu had been waiting for her to deal with the current situation. In the Prince's mansion, the two of them slept in separate rooms and had not been in contact since.
But now, when you're out and about, things are different.
After hesitating for a moment, Shang Xu tentatively asked, "Will Your Highness sleep here tonight?"
Yan Yize looked at him, nodded, and said very naturally, "We are husband and wife, so naturally we should sleep together."
Shang Xu pursed his lips, not replying. A bitter feeling spread wildly in his heart. Before tonight, they had never shared a room. If it were before, he might have had some expectations, but after she mentioned divorce, he had given up hope.
The word "divorce" is like a curse, firmly imprinted in his mind, constantly reminding him not to overstep the bounds.
Shang Xu nodded to indicate that he understood, and stepped outside, saying, "I'm going to sleep on the couch outside."
Since you're going to separate, keeping your distance is better for both of you.
Yan Yize's words were tinged with a probing element. Although she had already guessed the answer, hearing it with her own ears still annoyed her. As he passed by, she reached out and grabbed his arm. Shang Xu turned around, his eyes full of doubt. Yan Yize released his arm and turned to walk out, saying, "You sleep in the bed."
Shang Xu stood there, his eyes lowered, a mixture of emotions churning within them. Sharing a bed with her was what he had looked forward to most, but now, looking back, that expectation had long since vanished.
She didn't believe him, and Shang Xu was angry with her, but what truly pierced his heart was her blurting out the idea of divorce.
He walked back to the bedside, thought for a few seconds, and lay down fully clothed. He had been sleepy just now, but now he couldn't fall asleep no matter what. Shang Xu forced himself to close his eyes, but his ears were unconsciously listening to the sounds outside.
He wasn't the only one who couldn't sleep tonight. Yan Yize lay on the couch, staring blankly at the sky. They had gotten along so well before, she didn't understand why he had rejected her request for reconciliation.
She had misunderstood him before, but now, Shang Xu was distancing himself from her, giving her no chance to make amends.
Yan Yize sighed in the darkness. What should she do?
A note from the author:
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