"As a queen, isn't it your job to be generous?"
——Jin Suting
***
Jin Suting always felt that this topic was too embarrassing. "I'm fine, nothing happened at all."
Helan Ruizhe: "But you bled last night."
Jin Suting: "..."
Nonsense, who doesn't bleed the first time...
Is he pretending to be stupid or is he really stupid...
Jin Suting: "This is a very normal phenomenon."
Helan Ruizhe: "Are you really okay?"
Jin Suting: "Drink porridge, haha."
She originally thought that nothing was wrong when she woke up in the morning, but when she got out of bed, she found that it was not the case.
Her legs were still a little weak, and if Helan Ruizhe hadn't supported her, she would have almost fallen. It was better to go slowly.
"Yueji, give me the list of all the girls who participated in the selection, along with their family backgrounds and past histories."
Jin Suting seemed to be really concerned about Helan Ruizhe's affairs.
***
On September 15th, the Ghost Festival, the moon is full as families reunite.
The palace is not very lively, everyone is living their own life.
At the palace, the servants had prepared a table full of dishes. For the sake of the festival, Yu Qinglan forced a smile and spoke to Helan Yinsheng.
But his mood was the same as in the past three years, neither too strong nor too weak. It didn't feel like a family reunion festival, but more like a funeral at home.
The servants all looked at the prince's concubine's expression and dared not say a word.
Yu Qinglan sneered in his heart. It was the third year, and they hadn't celebrated the holidays properly in these three years.
The child she lost three years ago was an eternal pain in her heart, but Helan Yinsheng clearly didn't seem to care.
After eating only a few bites of food, he went back to his study.
Yu Qinglan was depressed, but she didn't want to lose her temper in front of the servants, and she tried hard to maintain the illusion that the two of them were respectful to each other.
But who couldn't see that the prince had long stopped loving her.
The bitter wine was so spicy that she frowned frequently, but she still drank cup after cup. After a long time, the taste in her mouth disappeared, but she was still drunk. She held the jar of wine and staggered out to watch the moon.
The Ghost Festival is a festival of reunion.
Her grandfather died, her father was ill, and her brother was busy so she didn't know when she would be able to see him again.
My husband is so cold and indifferent. I feel like a invisible person in front of him.
After Grand Tutor Yu died, Helan Yinsheng's attitude towards her changed. Anyone with eyes could guess what happened.
In the past three years, she rarely got so drunk, and even rarely touched alcohol, because she had to manage the palace and make friends with the wives of the ministers on behalf of Helan Yinsheng.
She became so smooth and hypocritical that she didn't even recognize herself anymore.
It may be that I have been worrying about too much for too long and I urgently need an outlet to vent.
She drank a lot and got completely drunk.
The moon in the sky was so big and so round, it was really beautiful, but she couldn't touch it and could only watch it from afar.
She looked dazed for a moment, and then a firework exploded, and her eyes were filled with brilliance.
If it weren't for the reflection, how could her eyes be so bright?
Did you ask her if she regrets it?
Can this be solved by regret?
Don’t we have to keep moving forward with all the scars?
While admiring the moon, she walked to the door of Helan Yinsheng's study.
Yu Qinglan is very smart and has enough willpower to control himself, but alcohol still breaks through all his defenses.
"Helan Yinsheng!"
She pushed the door open and dropped the wine jar to the ground. The sound of the shattering was drowned out by the sound of exploding fireworks.
Helan Yinsheng, who was reading a book, was a little annoyed. "What are you doing?"
"Making a fuss?" Yu Qinglan felt a little hot and irritated, pulling his collar open a little, "Who's making a fuss? Who's been making a fuss in my heart for more than ten years and still refuses to leave!"
She rushed in front of Helan Yinsheng, stabbing her chest with her index finger. The courage she usually lacked was brought out by a glass of wine. "Are you just relying on the fact that I like you and love you like crazy? Even if you kill my child, I won't care! You just rely on the fact that I like you to do whatever you want to me without taking any responsibility!"
There was no trace of emotion in Helan Yinsheng's eyes. He asked calmly, "How much did you drink?"
Yu Qinglan patted her cheeks. Her hair was all messy, hanging on both sides, touching her nose and mouth, and covering her eyes.
She giggled, stretched out her fingers and made a number, smiling: "Not much, just one, hiccup, one cup."
Helan Yinsheng looked at the broken wine jar and was speechless.
He naturally regarded what Yu Qinglan had just said as drunken nonsense, and even if it was true, he would not take it to heart. "I'll take you back to your room."
But Yu Qinglan pushed his hand away with all her strength, and ripped off her clothes, exposing her skin. She closed her eyes and yelled at him, "Don't you like my body? Come on, I'm right here, why don't you want me anymore... You haven't touched me in the past three years..."
The roars and the sounds of fireworks mixed together, and Helan Yinsheng only felt the noise. He picked up the clothes on the ground and wrapped her up.
"Yu Qinglan, don't degrade yourself."
Helan Yinsheng's eyes were cold, just like the autumn night wind.
She trembled and tugged at Helan Yinsheng's clothes, begging her not to leave.
This was definitely the most humble moment in her life. She was crying so hard that she couldn't speak, but she was still begging this man who didn't love her to stay.
But in the end, he didn't even spare her a glance and walked out of the room resolutely.
Yu Qinglan grabbed at the air twice, caught nothing, and fell to the ground.
Maybe they were happy for a short period of time, but it was so short that she couldn't even remember it.
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