Chapter 65 Chapter 65 What do you like about me?
Qin Sheng was a little confused.
Although it was just an inconspicuous action, and was nothing compared to their usual more intimate hugs and kisses, this matter could not be compared in this way. Intimacy and closeness literally mean the same thing, but they have two different connotations.
Some things are not noticeable when you are not paying attention, but once you discover them, they are really obvious. Xu Zhaoyi's actions are obvious, and the affection in his eyes is also obvious.
Even Noodles, this little idiot AI, accurately identified a smell that was more than friendship but less than love, and was stunned for a moment.
After a long moment, the noodles made a sharp popping sound: [Holy crap! Host, you didn't turn my colleague's male lead gay, did you?!]
Although it occasionally nibbles a little, it's just for fun. Will it really eat something? When its unlucky colleague wakes up, how will it explain it to him?
Qin Sheng was still in disbelief. In his opinion, there was no sign that Xu Zhaoyi was gay. He always thought his wife was as straight as a telephone pole.
Not long ago, she needed his help in desensitization so that she wouldn't be so stiff when having physical contact with him. But now, she suddenly seemed to have fallen in love with him, and was deeply in love with him.
Is this…is this right?
This is more like a love drug, right?
Qin Sheng pondered what had happened to cause Xu Zhaoyi's sudden change, and finally asked Noodles uncertainly: "What do you think the possibility is that he fell in love with Ling Huan at first sight, and after discovering that Ling Huan and I were the same person, he transferred his feelings to me?"
Noodles may know nothing about love, but they do understand one thing: If you, with your infuriatingly handsome face, can't impress your little daddy even after spending every day with him, how can Ling Huan make a straight man fall in love with him at first sight? Is it because of that ugly graffiti mask on his face?
Xu Zhaoyi is not one of those stereotypical marginal characters in male-oriented novels. When a strange masked man heroically rescues her, my little sister falls in love with him and I bow down to him.
He's the male protagonist. Even if he doesn't have a strong heart, at least he won't be so easily bent, so...
[This is definitely your fault, don’t blame others!]
Qin Sheng sighed in his heart. It was not that he wanted to pass the blame, but he really did nothing!
Fortunately, it was just a small incident where Xu Zhaoyi lost his composure, and the two of them soon separated as if nothing had happened. After Qin Sheng tied his tie for him, he naturally took two steps back, looked at him and said, "I think this suit is nice, what do you think?"
Hearing this, Xu Zhaoyi looked in the mirror and nodded. In fact, he couldn't see much difference between the ones he had just tried on. Since Qin Sheng said it was okay, then fine. He was too impatient to try again. Looking at the piles of clothes boxes, he felt like life was hopeless.
The two absent-minded people hastily decided on the style of the wedding dress without finishing it. Fortunately, there was nothing ugly among the clothing samples, and since both of them were good at clothes, it was not a big deal.
After Qin Sheng arranged the dress, he went to the study under the pretext of dealing with work emails, then closed the door and shut himself off.
He couldn't figure it out, really.
How could anyone be so magnanimous as to fall in love with someone who killed him in his previous life? If you put yourself in his shoes, even if the other person has his own difficulties, it won't work. He is already doing his best by not using the sword of this life to avenge his past life's grudge.
Of course, since they started working together, Qin Sheng has always been very caring towards Xu Zhaoyi. In addition, Xu Zhaoyi is softer-hearted than him, so he is sure that Xu Zhaoyi has let go of the things in his previous life.
But letting go doesn’t mean it never happened. It will remain in your memory and cannot be erased. Every time you think of it, you have to let it go again. Doesn’t that feel like a thorn in your throat?
Qin Sheng really hadn't thought about this situation. He even began to doubt whether the affection he just felt was just an illusion.
At this time, Noodles asked him what he planned to do.
He paused for a moment and said, "Of course, there's nothing I can do! There's still a hidden danger between him and me. If we develop any deeper feelings at this point, no matter what they are, they'll all become the burning fuel for a confession."
Qin Sheng subconsciously dismissed his own emotional orientation as an unimportant interference factor, only considering that his relationship with Xu Zhaoyi should not change before everything was confessed.
Once the window paper is broken, I can't imagine how awkward their relationship would be if he didn't choose to accept it. But if he tried to accept it, it would be even worse. If he explains everything in the future, would Xu Zhaoyi think that he deliberately plotted against his favor?
Although by that time, whether Xu Zhaoyi believed him or whether they would break up would not be so important to him, but Qin Sheng... was unwilling to go towards a bad outcome.
Whether it was an emotional component or a sunk cost, he didn't want to artificially make the relationship more difficult.
It would have been better if he hadn't discovered it. Now, even he doesn't know how to strike a balance.
He was introverted for a while and set the rules for their future relationship: stop teasing his wife with boring behaviors, control his mouth, and keep physical contact for the time being.
The main thing is that they are about to get married, and their intimacy cannot go down. Qin Sheng reflected on it and thought that he should not have done anything excessive to his wife, at most he just hugged her.
Alas...how could this be?
He took a long sigh before pulling himself together again.
In the days that followed, Qin Sheng's attitude remained completely unchanged, except that he became a little more restrained in his words.
——He didn’t dare to call his wife anymore.
Xu Zhaoyi didn't think it was wrong at first, because Ling Huan happened to ask him if he didn't like being defined as a wife, and then Qin Sheng tried to change his words, which was very reasonable.
But after a long time, he was not a fool. When Qin Sheng joked with him, the jokes became more formal, and he could still feel it.
Xu Zhaoyi was distressed for a long time. He didn't need Qin Sheng to restrain himself. Although Qin Sheng was quite annoying when he talked nonsense, he was even more at a loss now.
Unfortunately, Qin Sheng's changes were not obvious, and Xu Zhaoyi couldn't say to him, "Sorry, I'm still more used to your mean-spirited side. Can you change back?"
Qin Sheng was initially very satisfied with the way they were getting along, but even the slightest change was creating a rift. By the time the wedding day approached, the two had become somewhat restrained in their conversations.
Before going to bed that day, Qin Sheng thought that after returning to the Qin family, they would not be able to use spiritual energy as freely as they did at home, so he asked Xu Zhaoyi if he wanted to stay in the original room for the last few nights, just to relax in the abundant spiritual energy.
Xu Zhaoyi didn't answer immediately. He just stared at him for a while before whispering, "I understand."
Qin Sheng: "…" How did you suddenly know something like this? Explain it clearly!
His heart suddenly skipped a beat.
This feels like something really, really bad is going to happen.
In fact, Xu Zhaoyi's heart gradually sank in such a tense atmosphere, and he finally realized that this was not just Qin Sheng's misinterpretation of restraint, it was more like...
A gentle, silent rejection.
Then what is there to not understand? Those illusions of being liked in the past were really just illusions. Qin Sheng was probably discovered that he liked her and was frightened.
Thinking about when this situation started, Xu Zhaoyi quickly found the source of the turning point. On the day of trying on the dress, Qin Sheng was very excited. She asked people to send so many boxes of clothes, but in the end she said she had chosen after trying on a few sets.
He subconsciously ignored the slight feeling that was not right at the time, but if he really thought about it, it was easy to guess why.
It’s hard for Qin Sheng to endure it until now because he was afraid of embarrassing him!
When Xu Zhaoyi thought of this, he couldn't even lie down on the bed anymore. He couldn't help but turned over and said, "I'll move back now. You sleep well. Good night."
He took the pillow and was about to leave. Qin Sheng didn't know what to think. He just felt that if he let him leave at this time, their relationship would definitely get worse, so he reached out and grabbed a corner of the pillow.
When the two men's eyes met, sparks flew like lightning, and they exerted their strength in their hands. How could an ordinary pillow withstand their pulling? It broke into two pieces with a crack.
"Hiss, sorry." Qin Sheng's eyebrows jumped and he woke up. He rubbed his temples and apologized to Xu Zhaoyi, then forcefully pulled him back to sit on the bed.
After this happened, we can’t let people go.
He was racking his brains for words, but Xu Zhaoyi, who had been staring at him for a while, interrupted him. "If you're just trying to trick me, forget it. I understand what you mean. I'm not the type of person who turns evil when they can't get what they want. You don't have to worry."
This sounded familiar, as if Qin Sheng had also said this to him, but he couldn't remember when he said it. Xu Zhaoyi even admired himself for having the mind to think about this at this time.
Qin Sheng was hit in the face by a straight ball, neither too hard nor too light, and sighed helplessly.
"I really didn't think of you that way. I just habitually wanted to whitewash the situation. I didn't expect that this would make you feel even worse. I'm sorry."
He tried to sound sincere: "Do you remember that there is a secret between us that has not been solved?"
Xu Zhaoyi was stunned when he heard this.
In fact, he never really regarded this so-called secret as a big deal, because his psychological bottom line has always been very clear. As long as Qin Sheng did not do anything harmful to the world, he would not be unable to accept it just because he saved his parents.
What's more, he had already guessed that Qin Sheng kept this secret, not because he was guilty, but because he probably did not have enough evidence to prove his innocence and was worried that he would not believe him.
Qin Sheng also saw what he was thinking, so he smiled and said quietly, "I think you can guess what I'm most worried about. I'm afraid you won't trust me. What do you think if I take advantage of you with bad intentions at this time, what will you think when you know the truth in the future?"
Was it a love-struck brain attack that confused love and trust, or was it a sudden awakening?
"And, frankly, I didn't expect you to... I thought you were a straight-laced person..."
Qin Sheng touched his nose and muttered something, and was then given an unpleasant look by Xu Zhaoyi.
The sense of familiarity I had developed over the past few months came back inexplicably, as if it had never been unfamiliar.
"I haven't thought about it that way. If I knew you... I wouldn't call you wife all the time. Now that I think about it, isn't that like sexual harassment?"
"That's not the case."
The corners of Xu Zhaoyi's mouth twitched slightly, stopping him from self-deprecating. There was no need to do that. He liked Qin Sheng and had liked her long before Qin Sheng called her his wife. He wasn't really offended.
Seeing his expression soften, Qin Sheng continued, "I really don't know what to do. My usual approach to handling problems is clearly not working. Seeing how I've offended you just now... you're practically ready to cut off all contact with me."
His tone was filled with lingering fear and a hint of tea.
"I didn't!" Xu Zhaoyi felt very wronged.
How could he possibly break up with Qin Sheng over something like this? Even if he wanted to reduce their contact, this wouldn't be the time.
Qin Sheng brought the pillow that was broken into two pieces in front of him and looked at him quietly, his silence speaking louder than words.
Xu Zhaoyi was stuck for a moment: "...If you didn't use enough force, it wouldn't be like this."
He tried to reason with him.
It was clearly Qin Sheng who held on to his pillow and refused to let go, which caused it to be dismembered. However, it turned out to be the ironclad evidence for him to be condemned and never have any further contact with him. Is there any law in this?
Qin Sheng had his own reasons. He raised his eyebrows and said, "I tried my best to keep you."
Xu Zhaoyi choked: “…” Qin Sheng had said all the good and bad things, what else could he say?
Finally, Qin Sheng took out a new pillow and put it on the bed. He patted it and motioned Xu Zhaoyi to lie back. Xu Zhaoyi hesitated for a moment, but still lay back.
Qin Sheng turned off the main light in the room, leaving only the warm light of the bedside night light, which was better than nothing.
In the dim light, the two gradually calmed down. At this time, Qin Sheng spoke again: "I am used to weighing the pros and cons. I didn't handle my relationship with you well. Can you tell me what you think?"
He tried to give the initiative to Xu Zhaoyi.
Xu Zhaoyi was silent for a long time, so long that Qin Sheng thought he didn't want to respond, and only then did he hear his answer, or question.
"Why are you so nice to me?" he asked seriously, and emphasized: "Tell the truth."
Qin Sheng thought about it and realized that at this point, there was nothing he couldn’t say.
So I said sincerely, "This is the only part of my interpersonal relationship that I can control. I need you to feel good about me. Well, not that kind of good feeling... Anyway, I want to establish a good cooperative relationship with you. Treating you well at all costs is what I believe is a win-win situation."
Because the kindness shown to others can be taken back at any time, getting used to others being nice to him is what people like him are most reluctant to try. This is a form of cowardice. Qin Sheng knows it very well, so he has never overestimated his own virtues.
He chose his words carefully and analyzed his true thoughts to Xu Zhaoyi.
It was the first time that Xu Zhaoyi heard such a 'fallacy'.
In his upright worldview, when a person is kind to another person, it is naturally because of love that they will give their all without considering the gains and losses. But in Qin Sheng's mouth, why is it that the one who passively accepts the kindness is the one who suffers the loss?
What twisted logic is this?
But thinking deeper, thinking about the relationship between Qin Sheng and the Qin family, Xu Zhaoyi felt his heart tighten, and he suddenly understood something.
Didn't the Qin family treat Qin Sheng well, regardless of the cost? They spoiled him to the point of wanting the stars and not the moon, but this kind of kindness was like arsenic wrapped in sugar. Once you got used to it and immersed in it, it was like prey entangled in a spider's web, waiting to die day by day.
It seems that the Qin family is making endless contributions, but in fact, this kindness can be taken back at any time, leaving Qin Sheng with nothing at any time.
Qin Sheng had experienced the gentle trap set by the Qin family, so naturally he would be wary of other people's kindness and could no longer easily believe other people's feelings for him.
The heart is as hard as black iron and will not move easily.
Maybe it's more than that.
Xu Zhaoyi felt complicated and indescribable, and Qin Sheng obviously had no way to understand what a healthy relationship should be like from the interpersonal relationships around him.
He learned a lesson from the Qin family, but he also learned something from the Qin family.
The Qin family used their efforts to numb him, and he also used their efforts to win over himself. Fortunately, Qin Sheng in this life was not a bad person by nature, and did not think of going with the flow when he found out that he liked him.
Xu Zhaoyi thought about it and rinsed Qin Sheng as if he had used bleach, rinsing him clean.
He glanced at Qin Sheng, who had just confessed his inner journey and was lying on his side looking at him eagerly, and suddenly felt a surge of pity.
He did not rashly comment on Qin Sheng's ideas, but just looked at him for a while, and finally chuckled:
"It's okay, you can continue to be nice to me."
Qin Sheng: “…”
Although I understood what Xu Zhaoyi meant was that he would not misunderstand me again and that they could still get along with each other at a pace that made them comfortable, why did this sound so strange?
And did Xu Zhaoyi forget something?
——What do you like about me?
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