The tall, thin man, probably annoyed by the fat man Hu Fei's attack, yelled at the fat man, his face flushed red.
"You can do it like that!" Luan Chu's words were like a wake-up call. Wang Yao's eyes widened as if he had been enlightened, but he quickly calmed down.
"Don't worry, young master, our gift for this occasion will definitely not be lacking. But as you know, it's not easy to ascend to immortality in the human realm these days, and I'm a bit short on cash right now..." The fat man coaxed Wang Yao while inwardly cursing Luan Chu for being too stupid, blurting out everything he should and shouldn't have said.
Wang Yao has only just entered the Heavenly Court. As for the two of them, all they need to do is maintain a good relationship with this newly appointed Matchmaker. How could they possibly let him do anything bad? If they corrupt the child, wouldn't we be the ones who suffer? No wonder they haven't been able to find a wife for three hundred years, serves them right!
"My current level is too low, and you two should be among the immortals. My immortal realm interface is blocked, so even if I wanted to help you, I am powerless to do so." Wang Yao took out the tattered iPad and showed it to the two of them.
"That's right. I did hear a while ago that the Heavenly Court launched some kind of doomsday plan. They talked to Xi Fu and shut down the Immortal Realm interface. But it doesn't matter. Young Master needs to connect with immortals and still needs to work hard to upgrade. Anyway, Luan Chu has already waited for three hundred years, so a few more years won't make a difference."
"Moreover, I estimate that it will be impossible to reopen the Immortal Realm interface to the Matchmaker before that doomed plan is completed. It will probably take several years. Anyway, we can wait. Young Master, there's no need to rush. Just focus on earning merit and leveling up," Hu Fei said.
"It seems that Xi Fu had a big argument with Taibai Jinxing because of this, and even Taishang Laojun couldn't persuade them to stop. After that, Xi Fu's mind became unsettled, and he submitted his resignation early on. If it weren't for Lü Xian's insistence that he find a successor himself, he would have quit years ago."
Luan Chu then went on to gossip about Xi Fu, and Wang Yao nodded in agreement.
This trap set by Xi Dazui was dug long ago, just waiting for him to jump in. It's not that I'm too stupid, it's just that this old thief is too damn cunning, it's impossible to guard against him. Even if I escape this trap, there will definitely be an even bigger one waiting for me.
"However, we brothers are still very excited that the eldest young master has taken over as the matchmaker. Old Master Xi Fu has been in this position for too long. Just like our Lu Xian said, he lacks enthusiasm for his work, likes to put on airs, and acts like he's a senior. Only when he meets the eldest young master can Luan Chu still have a say..."
"If it's still that Xi Fu, even if Luan Chu waits another 300 years, there will be no hope at all."
"What? You immortals also value marriage?" Wang Yao asked in surprise. In his mind, immortals, who do not eat grains and drink dew, should have long since stopped caring about marriage and funerals. But judging from Hu Fei's words, it seems that immortals still care about this.
“Well… of course, of the three unfilial acts, the greatest is to have no offspring! Look at those bald monks in the Western Paradise, how many are left now? They don’t produce offspring themselves, so they just keep going through each cycle of reincarnation. And now it’s the Dharma-ending Age, and there are fewer and fewer people who have attained enlightenment…” Hu Fei nodded repeatedly.
"I heard that after the Buddha sat down, there aren't even enough servants to serve tea in four shifts and three shifts."
Luan Chu added from the side.
"Don't talk nonsense about things you didn't see with your own eyes..." Hu Fei tried to poke Luan Chu again, but Luan Chu nimbly dodged him.
“I’m not making this up. I know a disciple of Bodhi Patriarch named Fang Youlun. He said he heard it from his master. It was said that once Bodhi Patriarch, Hongjun Daozu, and Yuanshi Tianzun went to play cards with Buddha, but no young monk came to take over in the middle of the night.”
The four of them chatted for most of the night without even having a sip of tea.
Luan Chu said emphatically.
"Can you please stop spouting such hearsay in the future!" Hu Fei looked at Luan Chu with a pained expression. "How could Patriarch Bodhi and the others be playing cards? They must be discussing crucial issues concerning the future development of the Six Realms. It's all because of your mouth that this happened..."
"Don't believe or spread rumors, that's what Lu Xian just said in his report, have you already forgotten?"
“The four of them are all attending Lao Xian University, they often play poker, and they even have a Guandan tournament during the Chinese New Year. Why can’t we talk about it? It’s not a rumor at all!” Luan Chu was still stubbornly insisting.
"Even if it's true, won't it affect the leader's image? You're still talking nonsense!" Hu Fei's chubby face turned red with anxiety.
"It's alright, it's alright, I won't spread it around. Um... are there many single men in the immortal realm?"
Seeing that the two were about to start arguing, Wang Yao quickly smoothed things over and changed the subject.
"Young Master, you don't know, this kid's problem is his mouth. When I ascended to the Immortal Realm, he was the one who arranged my job. Think about it, after all these years, what have I accomplished? I can't even find a wife, all because I can't keep my mouth shut." Hu Fei continued to ramble on.
"That's because I'm honest and upright, and I'm not used to being opportunistic!" Luan Chu rolled her eyes at Hu Fei, then turned to look at Wang Yao. "There are so many bachelors in the Immortal Realm! Just think about it, if you add the word 'immortal' before a woman's name, how valuable would she be? Even if she's old, she'd still be an old fairy!"
"Give me a break! Have you ever seen a fairy who's aged? With just a little effort, once you reach a higher level, it's more effective than any skincare product. They all get younger and younger with age. We powerless, penniless, and weak male immortals have it the hardest in Heaven..." Hu Fei interjected.
"You know, a large part of the reason why mortal women in the human world get married is because they're worried about getting too old and becoming old maids..."
"Hey Hu, that's not fair of you. When your Ruolan married you, she wasn't even 16 years old yet, was she?" Luan Chu started picking on Hu Fei again.
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