Chapter 22 He and she, entangled in a never-ending cycle…
The next day, Ling Zhenli used the excuse of going to a temple in the suburbs to burn incense, and rode out of the East Palace gate alone in a sedan chair, without any palace maids, only a few guards following her.
Through the gap in the sedan curtain, she saw the newly hung colorful silk ribbons on Zhuque Street. They were hung up yesterday for Princess Jin'an's wedding. The phoenixes embroidered with gold thread were baring their fangs and claws, which was very impressive.
The morning mist floats in the forest, like a light veil draped over the tree branches.
The first rays of sunlight pierced through the leaves, turning the dewdrops golden. The forest was filled with the gentle chirping of birds, a truly delightful sight.
Xiao Chongheng's villa was nestled against the mountain and beside the water, near Huaiming Temple. On the way there, he heard that he had spent a huge sum of money to build a tower at Huaiming Temple, so he asked her to go to Huaiming Temple first, and then he would send someone to secretly bring her to the villa to meet him.
Ling Zhenli looked at the people coming and going in the smoke from the burning incense, offering incense and making wishes, and was filled with emotion.
Some people are of noble status and wear fine clothes, yet they still have worries.
Some were dressed in rags, with their families in tow, only praying for Buddha's blessing.
There is nothing in this world that can be achieved through mere prayer; people come here simply to seek a moment of comfort.
Her relationship with Xiao Chongheng was not one of deep affection but shallow fate; rather, it was a matter of human effort.
Meeting is pointless; it only adds to the sadness.
...
Ling Zhenli stood in front of the door, pondering for a long time, and hesitated to push the door open and go in.
Xiao Chongheng has always been a thorn in her heart, capable of causing her heartache with ease. As long as she stays away from Xiao Chongheng, she can escape the pain.
But……
Xiao Chongheng's eyes were deep and shrewd, easily seeing through her, as if her every move was under his control, and he was always playing with her, unwilling to let her go.
But how could she possibly let Xiao Chongheng go?
Ling Zhenli sighed softly and pushed open the door.
The furnishings that came into view were exactly the same as the courtyard where she lived in Zuixianlou, with even the details of the decorations being exactly the same.
Memories of the past flooded back to her, and Ling Zhenli instantly realized that this was something Xiao Chongheng had done on purpose.
Ling Zhenli suppressed her emotions, picked up a porcelain vase for flower arrangement, and discovered that the missing corners on the vase were exactly the same as those in Zuixianlou.
In other words, after she left Zuixianlou, Xiao Chongheng moved everything from there over and recreated a new courtyard exactly as it was.
Why did he do this? Wasn't I dispensable to him?
But if that's really the case...
She lowered her eyes, her hands clasped tightly together, feeling a mix of unease, panic, and urgency.
With a feeling of unease, she arrived at the location of the sleeping quarters.
As expected, the bedchamber remained exactly as it was on the day she left Zuixianlou.
As if revisiting a familiar place, she was instantly bewitched, sitting down at the dressing table, pulling open the bottom drawer, utterly terrified, her heart pounding wildly...
Just as she expected, the moment she opened the drawer, a pale yellow dress appeared before her eyes.
Ling Zhenli picked up the little dress, and the tears she had been holding back for so long finally flowed out.
Tears fell one after another, wetting the little jacket she held in her hands.
This dress was sewn by her, stitch by stitch, with great anticipation for her child.
The child she lost... the child she had longed to be born into this world day and night...
Before she knew it, a cat crawled up to her legs. She hadn't seen it in a long time, and it rubbed against her legs to get her attention.
At the entrance to the bedchamber, the man quietly appeared while she was lost in thought.
Seeing her in pain, Xiao Chongheng felt a sharp pain in his heart.
After the child was lost, both of them mourned in their own ways.
If that child had stayed, everything would have been different. What a pity, what a pity.
Ling Zhenli sensed Xiao Chongheng's arrival when the cat rubbed against her leg, but she was too heartbroken to pay attention.
She cried for a while until she controlled her emotions, took out a handkerchief to wipe away her tears and snot, and then turned to look at Xiao Chongheng.
Xiao Chongheng's eyes were also filled with tears.
"Why did you do this?" Ling Zhenli asked.
After asking the question, Ling Zhenli sniffed and looked away. She felt awkward and didn't want to look at Xiao Chongheng.
Taking advantage of her inattention, Xiao Chongheng quickly wiped away the tears in his eyes, which were now red.
"Ah Li, I miss you."
Ling Zhenli didn't want to play the emotional card with him; the more she tried, the sadder she became, and she didn't even glance at him.
"Stop talking nonsense, we're already in the past."
"Will it really be manageable?"
"..."
Ling Zhenli didn't answer, and after three seconds of silence, she asked, "What exactly do you want?"
Let's keep our relationship going, just like before.
Xiao Chongheng didn't seem to be joking, but Ling Zhenli really couldn't believe he was saying that.
"I am now the Crown Princess, what are you dreaming about?"
Xiao Chongheng seemed to have gone mad, spouting nonsense: "How could it be wishful thinking, Ali? You and I are inseparable. We even had a daughter. I named her Chiying, built a pagoda for her, and buried her at Huaiming Temple. Let's go and offer incense for her together. Just for the sake of the child, please don't leave me..."
Ling Zhenli was torn, but she knew she couldn't have any more contact with Xiao Chongheng, so she could only remain silent.
Seeing her silence, Xiao Chongheng felt even more pained.
"Why aren't you saying anything! Have you already fallen in love with Pei Xuanlin? The only reason he's nice to you is because you're the daughter of the Prime Minister, the designated Crown Princess! You are you! He doesn't even know who you are, so how can his affection be genuine! Only I am the one you love most. I know that you loved me from the very beginning. You're not just flattering me, are you? Otherwise, you wouldn't love that child, the child we have together. We're still young, we'll have more children. When Pei Xuanlin becomes emperor, with all the beauties in his harem, how could there still be a place for you in his heart!"
Xiao Chongheng's complaints came crashing down on Ling Zhenli, making it hard for her to breathe. Her heart ached, and tears streamed down her face uncontrollably.
"But what about you! What did you do to me when I loved you! You thought I was lowly and unworthy of you. You aborted my child so you could marry a high-ranking princess. Now you're using the child to torment and blackmail me! Do you know how much I wanted to give birth to her? You don't understand anything at all. All you do is belittle me, criticize me from a superior position, and turn the tables on me!"
"Am I supposed to just stand by and watch you die from exhaustion and loss of blood, along with your unborn child? Do you think I'm a cold-blooded and heartless person? You knew better than me how weak you were during your pregnancy, and how difficult it was to save the baby!"
Xiao Chongheng's rebuttal made Ling Zhenli's eyes red with anger. She broke down and screamed, using this hairstyle to vent her resentment.
"When I had just lost her and needed you the most, you were heartless and cruel, not even offering a word of comfort! You only cared about your new wife, and Cheng Yue never came to see me. I was heartbroken and even thought about committing suicide, and what did you do? You just abandoned me! You didn't want me anymore! Didn't you know that I couldn't even heal my wounds without you and had to continue selling myself? If you loved me, weren't you afraid I would die? Or were you hoping I would die sooner?"
Ling Zhenli was exhausted from yelling and dizzy from crying. Coupled with her anger and grievances, she had difficulty breathing. Seeing her like this, Xiao Chongheng couldn't bear to argue with her anymore and upset her.
After a dizzying sensation, Ling Zhenli leaned against the bedside, gasping for breath, on the verge of fainting.
Xiao Chongheng rushed over, grabbed her hand tightly, and explained, "I'm sorry, Ali, I'm so sorry. My mother transferred me away from the capital, which is why I couldn't see you. Abandoning you was my only choice. I'm so sorry, but I was really afraid my mother would harm you. Ali, please forgive me..."
"Is that so?" Ling Zhenli gave a weak, cold laugh, not believing his words.
If someone is determined to protect another person, there is no one they cannot protect.
Pei Xuanlin's father was already the emperor, yet he still died for the woman he loved. It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that the consort Yang Chengxiu was a remnant of the previous dynasty, yet Princess Jin'an still protected him. In the end, it was just that he didn't love her enough. In Xiao Chongheng's eyes, power was still the most important thing.
"You believe me, Ahri."
Ling Zhenli turned her head away and closed her eyes, unwilling to look at him.
"Ah Li, look at me..."
Seeing that she remained silent, Xiao Chongheng felt extremely frustrated. He regretted that he had given up on Ling Zhenli because he thought Ling Zhenli's status was not good enough for him and his mother threatened him.
She's right, what if she went and tried to kill herself?
Ling Zhenli was a woman with no power or influence, at the mercy of others. Xiao Chongheng knew perfectly well what would happen to her after he abandoned her, but at that time he was blinded by power and forgot that feelings were just as important.
It was his fault.
It's all his fault.
He hurt Ling Zhenli and still fantasized about going back to the past.
With tears welling in her eyes, Ling Zhenli was filled with inner turmoil and struggle. She looked up and gazed around the bedroom in a daze.
The bedroom was filled with all sorts of antiques and curios, decorated in a warm and beautiful style. In the past, the two of them had shared unforgettable lovemaking in every corner of that room. Now, the scene has reappeared, but the feelings are gone.
She admitted that Xiao Chongheng was right; she had truly loved him.
After a long while, Ling Zhenli got up and sat on the edge of the bed, as if she had made up her mind.
"It was you who led your troops to ransack my home and then hid it from me."
"……yes."
Xiao Chongheng was the executioner who wiped out her entire family. Because of his own selfish desires, he concealed his identity from her and kept her like a caged bird. When she fell in love with him, he cruelly abandoned her.
“You should have told me sooner,” Ling Zhenli chuckled weakly. “You should have told me after you took my virginity. I would have just killed myself. That way, you wouldn’t have lost out. At least you got me and could have seen the joke.”
"No, Ahri, I only did this because I truly love you. I'm so afraid of losing you..."
"Shh..."
Ling Zhenli placed her index finger on his lips, her eyes darting around, a slight smile on her lips, utterly exhausted, interrupting Xiao Chongheng's words.
He wasn't afraid at all.
But she was tired, emotionally exhausted, and didn't want to dwell on the past; she just wanted to focus on the present.
What she needs most right now is to protect the secret.
Then her expression softened, her voice became slightly hoarse, and it sounded very gentle.
"Ah Xun, I'm a little tired."
Seeing that her attitude had finally softened, Xiao Chongheng quickly sat on the bed and moved closer to her.
Ling Zhenli did not avoid his approach. Instead, she looked at him cooperatively. She was a little sleepy after crying, her expression was dazed, and her eyes were unfocused.
The atmosphere gradually became somewhat romantic. Seeing that she neither refused nor agreed, Xiao Chongheng tentatively raised his hand and took a jade hairpin from her hair. The next moment, her black hair cascaded down like a waterfall, with a few strands wrapping around his fingertips.
Just like him and her, their relationship went on and on, endlessly entangled.
Ling Zhenli closed her eyes and breathed steadily. Xiao Chongheng tried to stroke her arm again, and she did not pull away.
Gradually, his hand touched her face.
What he had been longing for day and night was right beside him at this moment.
His fingertips traced her earlobe slowly, the warmth gradually moving to her neck, feeling the slight tremor of her pulse. The warm touch made Ling Zhenli feel a little itchy, and he deliberately lingered on the hollow of her collarbone.
Her breathing became slightly erratic. Xiao Chongheng moved closer and closer, closing his eyes in a devout manner. His nose brushed against her flushed cheek, his breath hot against her skin.
He gently bit her lips, teasing and caressing them. Although Ling Zhenli did not respond, her tacit acceptance of his desire was already the maximum response she could give.
With a flick of his hand, the thin ribbon was untied.
As her robe was half undone, he tucked a strand of her hair into his fingertip and kissed it lightly, with genuine affection.
"I love you."
Her fingertips brushed against his palm, the cicadas outside the window suddenly fell silent, leaving only the sound of their intertwined breaths, which became increasingly clear in the anxious room.
Ling Zhenli felt as if she were in a sea of flowers, the fragrance of which was intoxicating. She was reluctant to part with it, and with a brightly blooming flower in her mouth, she wanted to take it apart and swallow it.
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