Chapter 19
He He's eyes widened. When she heard the word "frivolous," she couldn't help but tear up. She had never been insulted with such harsh words before.
Her hands trembled, and she took a step back, unable to believe that Chen Jingbai saw her as this kind of person.
"You insulted me."
"How could you insult me so horribly?"
He He's mind was completely occupied by Chen Jingbai's scolding her for being frivolous, and she completely blocked out what he had said before, only remembering that he called her frivolous.
Her nose stung, tears welled in her eyes, and she quickly turned her head to the left, avoiding Chen Jingbai's gaze and looking away from him. She blinked, trying to hold back her tears.
Chen Jingbai panicked when he saw her like this. He caught his breath, and the sound of the burning firewood was blocked out. Only He He's aggrieved voice echoed in his ears.
His dry throat choked out a few words in a panic, "I...I didn't mean that."
The emotions that had been suppressed were instantly shattered by He He's choked voice, and he clearly realized how hurtful his words had been.
Chen Jingbai's calm voice turned anxious: "I misspoke, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have spoken like that. I spoke too hastily just now, that wasn't my intention. Please forgive me, okay? I'll do anything you want to make up for it."
At the end, his tone became somewhat pleading.
He He didn't respond, and Chen Jingbai became even more flustered: "I didn't think before I spoke, please forgive me."
He He remained in her original position, secretly glancing at Chen Jingbai out of the corner of her eye. The anxiety and panic in his eyes caught her attention.
After a series of apologies, He He calmed down and began to recall what Chen Jingbai had said earlier.
So, is Chen Jingbai bothered by her getting close to Cheng Surin?
A sudden inspiration struck He He, and she suddenly remembered that she had never told Chen Jingbai that she was Cheng Sulin's aunt.
Her lips were slightly parted, and she was a little dazed. She was so focused on reminding Cheng Surin that she forgot to tell Chen Jingbai about it.
He He felt a little regretful. If Chen Jingbai misunderstood her relationship with Cheng Sulin, then his accusation that she was frivolous was not unfounded.
If you get caught having illicit relationships, you can go to jail, and in more serious cases, you might even be taken to a shooting range.
But that word really sounds awful. Even if Chen Jingbai was angry about this, why didn't he say anything or ask? When she said she wanted to date him, why didn't he ask her what her relationship with Cheng Surin was?
Even if she was wrong, Chen Jingbai didn't do the right thing either.
He He disliked this inexplicable coldness; the man would distance himself from her without saying a word.
She finally turned to look at Chen Jingbai.
Chen Jingbai's handsome face showed obvious guilt and remorse.
She suddenly realized that Chen Jingbai and his sister were quite similar; they both liked to keep things to themselves.
He He pursed her lips, the spot where she had been pressed turned red for a moment, but quickly returned to normal. "Cheng Sulin has to call me aunt. My relationship with him isn't what you think. It's true that I want to be with you."
Knowing that Chen Jingbai would become a big shot in the future, He He approached him with a heart full of wanting to be his girlfriend; she absolutely did not play him for a fool.
He He's eyes shone with sincerity: "I really didn't play you, and I really want to be with you."
She didn't shed any tears, but the skin around her eyes was delicate, and there was still redness at the corners of her eyes.
Looking at her like this, Chen Jingbai felt as if a heavy boulder was pressing down on his heart.
He He said she really wanted to be with him, which made Chen Jingbai's heart leap with joy, but when he thought about the words he had just said without thinking, his joyful heart instantly sank.
He hated his impulsiveness. If he hadn't been so impulsive, and had taken the initiative to ask her and find out more when he first started to care, he wouldn't have said those embarrassing things.
After calming down, he realized how hurtful his words were, but he didn't know how to make amends or how to make He He happy again.
Chen Jingbai clenched his fists and hung his head in dejection, as if he had shattered He He's heartfelt desire. "I'm sorry, I won't do it again."
Besides saying sorry, he didn't know what else he could say.
"There are still a few days left for rice planting. I'll help you get work points. Give me a chance to ask for forgiveness." He He didn't like going to work, and this was the only thing Chen Jingbai could think of that would make her happy. Apart from this, he didn't seem to have anything else to offer.
Hearing Chen Jingbai's words, He He took a few deep breaths.
Chen Jingbai's thoughts are hard to understand, and she doesn't want to try to guess his complicated mind. This is the thing she dislikes most about Chen Jingbai.
After Chen Jingbai's outburst, He He realized she had been too hasty. She had panicked upon hearing about her tragic future and thought that clinging to Chen Jingbai might change her fate.
Winning over Chen Jingbai is a difficult path. Must she remain fixated on him?
Even if she were to actually be with Chen Jingbai, she felt that this kind of thing—having a mouth but not being able to speak out—would happen many more times.
Chen Jingbai is just like that; she doesn't have the ability to change him, and even she herself finds it difficult to change the personality she developed in the past.
He He looked directly into Chen Jingbai's eyes, then glanced at another pair of eyes that resembled his.
Chen Jingyi is Chen Jingbai's twin sister, and the two of them are most similar in their eyes.
Pure black pupils, equally deep, like the deepest night, capable of drawing you in with a single glance; extremely deep double eyelids, with the corners of the eyes resembling small hooks.
A stronger thought flashed through her mind: He He no longer wanted to be Chen Jingbai's leading lady; she wanted to be Chen Jingyi's best friend.
Chen Jingyi was a very approachable person. In the educated youth settlement, Chen Jingyi was much gentler to her than Chen Jingbai was to her.
Moreover, with Cheng Surin as a connecting link, Chen Jingyi would be willing to take her along. At that time, as long as she is obedient to Chen Jingyi and listens to her just like Cheng Surin, and waits for Chen Jingyi to tutor her carefully, she can also get into university and return to the city.
After thinking it over, He He shook her head. "No need. I accept your apology. I'll go transplanting the rice myself. You don't need to bother me anymore. You're usually quite tired, and I'd feel even more embarrassed if I bothered you again."
Chen Jingbai stiffened, a rare look of panic flashing in his eyes. What did she mean by that? Was she trying to distance herself from him? Did He He no longer want to be his girlfriend?
"Then what can I do?" Chen Jingbai understood what He He wanted to express, and he could understand it, but he didn't want to accept it.
Someone who is used to compromising and doesn't like to get entangled asked cautiously, "I don't want us to just let this end like this."
He He was at a loss for words. It was something she had always wanted, but now that it was actually being offered to her, she didn't know how to accept it.
Strangely, she didn't feel that Chen Jingbai liked her much, nor could she sense his affection for her. He treated everyone the same, gentle yet distant, and the same was true for her.
Just like now, He He felt that Chen Jingbai wanted to do something to get her forgiveness because of what he had just said, and this feeling was too strange.
Besides, she didn't want to get together with Chen Jingbai so casually after this argument; it would be a waste of all the hard work she had put into pursuing him for so many days.
Moreover, it seems she has a better option now. He He no longer wants to keep pestering Chen Jingbai, who is getting no response.
During her time with Chen Jingbai, He He was always the one chasing after him. She didn't like it; it was very uncomfortable to keep doing it without getting any response.
She now understands things perfectly and feels incredibly smart. Clinging to Chen Jingyi's coattails is much easier than clinging to Chen Jingbai's. Why didn't she realize this before?
With her mood improving, He He put on a bright smile: "Okay, no need to be so serious, let's all calm down for a while."
Yeah, right. She's already decided to get along well with Chen Jingyi, and say goodbye to the difficult Chen Jingbai. She doesn't like people who don't speak up at all! Not at all!
When she smiled, dimples appeared on her radiant face, and her long eyelashes fluttered like small fans. In an instant, He He seemed to have regained all her vitality, and her adorable appearance, free from all her worries, left Chen Jingbai speechless.
Her emotions subsided quickly, but Chen Jingbai always felt that something was wrong, like the wind that couldn't be grasped, drifting away in an instant.
He hadn't figured out whether He He was truly indifferent or not, which was why she seemed so nonchalant.
Just as Chen Jingbai was about to speak, he saw He He pointing at the stove and shouting, "Quick, quick, the pot is going to burn!"
Before He He could speak, Chen Jingbai had just scooped some water into the pot to prevent it from burning. However, while the two of them were talking, the water had unknowingly boiled dry.
Seeing that the pot was about to burn through, Chen Jingbai had no choice but to put aside his business with He He, turn around and pour the vegetables into the pot to prevent it from getting hotter and hotter.
He squatted down again, picked up the chopped firewood next to him, added it to the fire pit, and shrunk the fire.
After finishing his business, Chen Jingbai stood up and discovered that He He had left sometime earlier, just as she had entered without anyone noticing.
With He He gone out, Chen Jingbai could only finish cooking the dishes he had on hand before taking them out and placing them on the dining table.
There was no one in the canteen. Even He He, who usually loved to be the first to sit in the canteen when it was his turn to cook, quietly waiting for the meal to be served and then setting out the food and bowls for him, was not there.
Chen Jingbai felt a surge of anxiety. It wasn't until he called everyone to dinner and He He and the other educated youth came in and sat back down in her original spot near the door instead of sitting opposite him that Chen Jingbai's anxiety subsided.
When He He said she needed to calm down, it meant a genuine and complete break with him, not the kind of calm he thought they should have to cool off and start over.
After everyone was seated.
Cheng Surin looked at He He, who had moved back to sit opposite him, and couldn't help but ask, "Why did you come back to sit by the door again?"
He He chewed on a piece of cabbage, "Otherwise, why would I sit inside before? It was raining, so why would I sit inside now that it's not raining? It's so stuffy inside."
She would never tell you that the real reason was that she didn't want to please Chen Jingbai anymore.
Cheng Surin asked suspiciously, "It hasn't rained for the past few days, why are you still sitting inside?"
Cheng Surin always loved to ask questions until he got to the bottom of things, which annoyed He He. She then spoke bluntly, "It's none of your business. I can do whatever I want."
"Fine, fine, you're the best, you're the most capable," Cheng Surin said helplessly.
He He exploded upon hearing this, gritting her teeth and saying, "Good nephew, what am I if not the most important person?" Because of this relationship, she became close to Cheng Surin, which made Chen Jingbai think she was frivolous.
He He didn't care about the age issue anymore. What she wanted now was for all the educated youth to know that Cheng Surin was her nephew, and for Cheng Surin to call her "Auntie" every day!
He He glanced around at the other educated youth, forcing a big smile on her face. "I didn't tell you before, but Cheng Surin and I are not only from the same place, but more importantly, my maternal uncle is his grandfather. He has to call me aunt. We are very close. If you see me ordering him around in the future, please don't be offended. It's what Cheng Surin should do."
With a smile on her face and a threatening look in her eyes, she fixed her circling gaze on Cheng Surin.
From now on, if she doesn't want to do any work, Cheng Surin will have to do it for her. A good nephew should be used more often. "Don't you think so, Xiao Cheng?"
Cheng Surin hadn't expected He He to reveal their relationship. Under He He's gaze, he dared not refuse and nodded repeatedly, "It's all the right thing to do."
He couldn't repay He He's money now, so it was only right that he did something for He He. But Cheng Surin seemed to foresee his own tragic fate as a laborer in the future.
Cheng Surin felt bitter inside. He still talked too much and didn't know what he had said to offend He He. He wished he could sew his mouth shut and talk less in the future.
The other educated youth glanced at He He, then at Cheng Sulin, not expecting the two to have this relationship, and began asking He He questions all at once.
He He explained with great familiarity: "My mother was the youngest child in my maternal grandparents' family. She had four older brothers, which means I have four uncles. Cheng Surin is the son of my eldest cousin, who was born to my eldest uncle. My eldest uncle and my mother are twenty years apart in age. Cheng Surin and I were born in the same year, but he still has to call me 'little aunt'."
He He raised an eyebrow, signaling Cheng Surin to call her aunt.
Cheng Surin really didn't want to understand He He's eyes, but he just couldn't. He He also knew that he understood.
Cheng Surin rarely called He He, who was the same age as him, his aunt in front of outsiders, but now he had to say it: "Yes, she is my aunt, no doubt about it."
"She's still the only girl in our family for generations, so she's quite spoiled at home, so..."
Cheng Surin didn't say the rest, but the educated youth all understood that He He had been spoiled too much, so some of her less-than-ideal behaviors in life could be explained.
He He was displeased, "You're talking badly about me!"
Cheng Sulin lowered her head, "I wouldn't dare."
He also mentioned that He He is now the only female in several generations, and those who are smart enough would guess that He He's mother may no longer be alive.
Of course, there were also some fools. Before anyone could stop him, Sun Jiabao asked bluntly, "Isn't Xiao He's mother also a woman? Why is she the only one?"
When this was mentioned, He He lowered her eyelashes. She never mentioned her mother's death to anyone, nor did she talk about her mother. As long as she didn't talk about it, no one would know that she didn't have a mother.
When Cheng Surin heard Sun Jiabao ask this question, he was speechless. Seeing He He's obvious sadness, he didn't know what to say, afraid that if he said something, He He would be even more upset.
Chen Jingbai reached out and tugged at Sun Jiabao's sleeve, giving him a warning look that signaled him to end the conversation.
Sun Jiabao belatedly realized what was happening, and froze in his seat, regretting how stupid he had been.
Everyone wanted the awkward moment to pass naturally, tacitly ignoring Sun Jiabao's words. No one expected He He to speak up herself: "My mother passed away when I was very young. It's okay, I'm used to it."
He He knew that avoiding the question wasn't a solution, and now that someone was asking her about her mother, she could gently address the question directly.
Zheng Xinxin put her arm around He He's shoulder and said, "Our He He is the strongest girl. It's okay, you have four uncles who spoil you, and you must have many cousins too. This life is so awesome."
He He nodded, noticing everyone's concerned gazes, and said with a relaxed smile, "Don't look at me, let's eat. I'm very happy now, I have more money than I can spend."
Li Baiyun finally laughed out loud: "Stop showing off, stop showing off. Everyone knows you're the richest among us educated youth."
Chen Jingyi looked at He He with some heartache. She never expected that He He, who was so cheerful, had also lost a loved one, and that was her closest relative.
Everyone started talking about their family structure or interesting things that had happened in their families, and the atmosphere became cheerful again.
After dinner, it was He He's turn to wash the dishes tonight. She couldn't cook, and she hadn't tried to learn to cook since going to the countryside. When it was her turn to cook, she would just leave it to Cheng Sulin. Don't let Cheng Sulin's big and burly appearance fool you; he cooks much better than He He.
He He entered the woodshed not because she was afraid the rice wouldn't cook properly, but because she was afraid of setting the woodshed on fire.
The dishwashing area is outside, where there is a pool of spring water flowing down from the mountain.
He He squatted on the ground, using the kerosene lamp next to the wooden basin and the moon hanging high above her head to carefully scrub the rice bowl with a pumpkin cloth.
During the second round of rubbing, another shadow appeared on the ground besides He He's shadow.
He He felt strange, turned halfway around and looked up, and saw Chen Jingbai looking down at her.
After they had talked about calming down before dinner, she was captivated by Chen Jingbai's appearance again.
She didn't stand up, but remained in a supine position, still holding the pumpkin cloth in her hands, her arms hanging down on the wooden basin full of bowls. "Why are you here? I'm washing the dishes."
Chen Jingbai walked to He He's side, squatted down facing her, placed one hand on his strong thigh, and said in a low voice, "How long do we need to calm down?"
Even in summer, the nights in the countryside are always cool when the wind blows.
The two were close together, and He He could smell Chen Jingbai's faint, clean scent. It was so refreshing that she almost succumbed to his charms again.
"I have no idea."
Chen Jingbai took a deep breath, his jawline tightened, and he looked intently at He He: "I'll wait for you to make up your mind."
He He was very sad tonight because of him, and also because her deceased mother was mentioned tonight. He wanted to comfort He He, but he didn't know how. He wasn't good at comforting people.
He He's pupils clearly reflected Chen Jingbai's sharp face, and a thought seemed to be taut in her mind, while her heart pounded in her chest.
Another gentle breeze blew by, and the rustling sound of the wind blowing through the bamboo forest not far away startled He He awake.
She asked, "And you, have you thought it through?"
The question was thrown back to Chen Jingbai, who didn't know if he had made up his mind. It was during those few seconds of pause that He He heard her heart calm down.
Chen Jingbai: "I've made up my mind."
He He: "I washed the dishes."
The two spoke at the same time, their words overlapping.
However, He He still heard Chen Jingbai's words clearly, but that was no longer the most important thing. She casually replied, "Okay, I know."
He He turned around and picked up the bowl to wash it again.
Chen Jingbai pursed his lips: "I've made up my mind. I want to give it a try with you."
At this moment, Chen Jingbai really wished he had He He's outgoing and natural personality, but he couldn't. Like most people, he was introverted and didn't know how to express love.
He He said calmly, "Okay, I understand, but I'm not calm yet."
Chen Jingbai didn't force her. "I'll wait for you, no matter how long it takes."
He He was somewhat moved. After knocking on the brick for so long, she could actually break through it. However, she still suppressed her excitement and said, "Okay."
Chen Jingbai tried to take the pumpkin cloth from He He's hand, saying, "Let me wash it for you."
It was the last round. He He didn't give way, but Chen Jingbai still reached out and washed the dishes directly with his hands.
After washing the dishes, Chen Jingbai helped her carry them inside.
He He originally wanted to go back and call Cheng Surin to move it, as she always did after washing the dishes. But now that Chen Jingbai was right next to her, he saw her intention and, without asking her opinion, simply picked up the wooden basin and left.
He He followed Chen Jingbai at a distance, watching his slender but tall figure.
Being cared for by Chen Jingbai in return felt really good, but He He's desire to remain cold and distant remained unchanged.
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