tired
Gu Jinghong was half-pushed and half-shoved out of the room by Xuan Ru. Holding the heavy, bitter and foul-smelling bowl of medicine, she stood outside Xiao Chengyan's bamboo hut where he was recuperating, her heart pounding like a drum.
After hesitating for a long time, thinking of his back as he shielded her from the arrows in the miasma, and thinking of the consequences of delaying his injury, Gu Jinghong took a deep breath, as if she had made up her mind, and pushed open the door and went in.
A faint smell of blood and medicine filled the bamboo hut. Xiao Chengyan lay quietly on the bamboo couch, his face still pale, but his breathing seemed more steady than before. His eyes were tightly closed, his thick eyelashes casting a small shadow beneath them, revealing a rare vulnerability beneath his usual cold and stern demeanor.
Gu Jinghong carried the medicine bowl and tiptoed to the bedside to sit down. She gazed at his sleeping profile, her heart filled with mixed emotions. She carefully scooped up a spoonful of medicine and tried to bring it to his lips, but sure enough, his lips were tightly pressed together, and the medicine dripped down the corner of his mouth, impossible to feed him.
She sighed helplessly and put down her spoon. It seemed... that was the only way.
Gu Jinghong took another deep breath, as if she were going into battle. She picked up the medicine bowl and took a large mouthful of the bitter medicine into her mouth, the taste making her frown. Then, she leaned down, gently pinching his chin with one hand, forcing him to open his mouth slightly, while using her other hand to hold his head still.
Just as her lips were about to touch his cold lips—
Xiao Chengyan's thick eyelashes trembled violently a few times, and then his deep, cold eyes suddenly opened.
Their eyes met!
The air seemed to freeze at that moment.
Gu Jinghong froze instantly, forgetting to swallow or expel the medicine in his mouth. He was completely frozen, his mind blank. She could even clearly see the initial bewilderment in his eyes quickly fade, replaced by astonishment, confusion, and a... indescribable light, like a sudden spark.
His gaze slowly moved down from her panicked eyes, so close to his, to her slightly parted lips stained with brown medicine, and then he felt her fingers pinching his chin and the hand holding his head steady... everything was self-evident.
Time seemed to stretch out countless times.
Xiao Chengyan didn't move, nor did he push her away. He just looked at her quietly, his pale face expressionless, but deep within his eyes, which had just awakened and were still somewhat weak, something seemed to be silently melting and surging. It was an extremely complex emotion, mixed with surprise, understanding, and even... a secret pleasure that he himself was unaware of.
Gu Jinghong finally snapped out of her petrified state, abruptly sitting up and gulping down the medicine in her mouth. The bitter taste made her face contort as she coughed. She hurriedly put down the bowl of medicine, her cheeks flushed red as if they were about to bleed. Her eyes darted around, too afraid to look at him, wishing she could disappear into the ground.
"I...I..." she stammered, trying to explain, but felt that it would be futile to say anything.
Xiao Chengyan remained silent, simply watching her flustered and embarrassed state. He slightly moved his still somewhat weak fingers, his gaze slowly shifting to the bowl of medicine, which was more than half full and emitted a strong, bitter smell, before returning to Gu Jinghong's flushed face.
After a moment of silence, a very low, hoarse voice, weak from recent recovery from serious injuries, yet seemingly containing a strange warmth, softly rang out: "The medicine... is very bitter?"
The air froze instantly.
The embarrassment of being caught made Gu Jinghong's cheeks burn, and her hand holding the medicine bowl was a little unsteady.
"Xuanru... asked me to bring the medicine." She tried to make her voice sound calm and even, attempting to hide her guilty conscience, and handed the bowl forward. "Your Highness, it's time to drink your medicine."
Xiao Chengyan's gaze lingered between her slightly flushed cheeks and the bowl of medicine. He didn't speak immediately, but merely frowned slightly, as if the smell of the medicine made him feel uncomfortable.
But Gu Jinghong clearly caught a fleeting, subtle, and indescribable emotion that seemed to flash across the depths of his eyes? Like... helplessness? Or something else entirely?
After a brief silence, his Adam's apple bobbed, and his voice, hoarse from his lingering injuries and with a hint of barely perceptible compromise, said, "...Give it to me."
Gu Jinghong was stunned for a moment. He... agreed so readily?
She quickly handed the medicine bowl to him, but Xiao Chengyan did not reach out to take it.
He could only lift his eyes with difficulty to look at Gu Jinghong, then at the bowl of medicine in her hand, his brows furrowed, his eyes filled with a strange sadness, as if to say, "Do you expect a seriously wounded soldier like me to hold this bowl and drink it myself?"
Gu Jinghong suddenly realized... Her hand holding the bowl froze in mid-air, unsure whether to feed him or not.
Just as she was torn between her inner turmoil and even began to suspect that Xuan Ru had been in cahoots with Xiao Chengyan all along, Xiao Chengyan seemed to sense her predicament and let out a barely audible sigh. The sigh was very soft, yet it seemed to carry a hint of resignation.
He finally moved his still somewhat weak arm and reached out to take the medicine bowl himself. His fingertips inevitably brushed against Gu Jinghong's fingers, bringing a slightly cool touch.
He ignored Gu Jinghong, his gaze fixed on the thick, brown liquid in the bowl. His brows furrowed even more, as if he were facing not medicine, but deadly poison. He paused for a full two or three seconds, as if he were undergoing some major mental preparation.
Then, under Gu Jinghong's breathless gaze, he suddenly tilted his head back and gulped down the bowl of infuriatingly bitter medicine in one go, like a warrior cutting off his own arm!
Xiao Chengyan forced back the nausea and vomiting, slamming the empty bowl down. A vein throbbed on his forehead, and a few tears welled up in his eyes. He closed his eyes and gasped for breath for a moment before barely managing to suppress the nausea. He leaned back against the pillow, completely exhausted, his face even paler than before taking the medicine, and his weakness even more pronounced.
Looking at his disheveled and pitiful appearance, Gu Jinghong's initial embarrassment was replaced by a complex emotion mixed with amusement and inexplicable tenderness. She subconsciously picked up the prepared water and towel: "Your Highness, would you like to rinse your mouth?"
Xiao Chengyan didn't open his eyes, but turned his head slightly, his thin lips pressed together, his brows furrowed, in a resistant posture that seemed to say "Don't bother me, let me catch my breath," but his weakness made his posture seem more like he was being difficult.
Helpless, Gu Jinghong could only dampen a cloth and carefully, tentatively, gently wipe the cold sweat from his forehead and the corners of his lips that might have been stained with medicine.
Just as her fingertips, through the cool, damp cloth, were about to touch the corner of his lips—Xiao Chengyan opened his eyes again.
A complex and seemingly aggressive emotion, unlike anything Gu Jinghong had ever seen before, surged within those deep eyes! It was like a torrent that had been suppressed for too long finally finding an outlet, mixed with the thrill of surviving a disaster, the secret satisfaction of being cared for by her, the peace of mind of seeing her by his side, and a kind of... almost instinctive possessiveness.
His movements were faster than those of someone seriously injured. He grabbed Gu Jinghong's wrist, which was holding the wet cloth, with such force that Gu Jinghong instinctively cried out in surprise, "Your Highness?!"
Xiao Chengyan completely ignored her exclamation and seemed oblivious to the pain in his wound. Using the strength he had in his grip on her wrist, he pulled her hard again.
Caught off guard, Gu Jinghong was pulled off balance and fell forward with a scream.
The next second, she was pulled tightly into his arms with an irresistible force.
Gu Jinghong's cheek slammed heavily against his firm chest, her nose instantly filled with the cool, slightly medicinal, and bloody scent emanating from him. His burning body temperature seeped through her thin clothes, making her panic. His strong arms wrapped tightly around her waist like iron hoops, while his other hand still gripped her wrist tightly, holding her firmly in his embrace.
"Xiao Chengyan, let go of your wound!" Gu Jinghong was both shocked and angry, struggling to get up, afraid of reopening his wound.
"Don't move!" Xiao Chengyan's voice rang out above her head, deep and hoarse, carrying the weak gasps of a seriously injured person, yet containing an undeniable domineering power and a... almost greedy sense of satisfaction. He not only didn't let go, but tightened his arms, resting his chin on the top of her soft hair, his hot breath brushing against her hair.
“Just like that…” It sounded like a sigh, yet also like a command, his voice muffled by the sound of his ear being buried in her hair, making his weariness all the more real, “Let me… hold you… and let you sleep for a while…”
His heart pounded heavily against her eardrums, his chest heaving with each breath, each breath aggravating his internal injuries and producing a soft groan. This genuine pain and weakness created a stark and contradictory contrast with his domineering and forceful confinement.
Gu Jinghong froze, all her struggles halted. A wave of shock, shame, and bewilderment, along with a strange sensation from his body heat, overwhelmed her. She could clearly feel the tension in his body and the slight trembling from his pain, the unyielding strength of his arms, and that… almost desperate attachment? As if confirming her existence, confirming that she was truly alive, in his arms.
"You...you're crazy..." Her voice trembled, whether from anger or something else, it was hard to tell.
"Hmm..." Xiao Chengyan responded vaguely, as if admitting it, or as if he didn't care at all. He tilted his head, and his dry, hot lips accidentally brushed against her forehead. It was an extremely subtle, almost unconscious touch, but it made Gu Jinghong tremble all over.
"Tired..." he whispered again, his voice growing softer and softer, as if the act of forcibly holding her in his arms had exhausted his last bit of strength. His heavy eyelids slowly closed, his breathing gradually becoming deep and even, and he actually fell into a deep sleep holding her like that. Only his arms, which were wrapped around her, stubbornly did not loosen their grip even slightly.
Gu Jinghong was held tightly in his arms, unable to move. Her cheek was pressed against his warm chest, listening to his gradually steady heartbeat and breathing, feeling the strength that still wouldn't let go even in his sleep... A huge sense of shame and an unprecedented, strange feeling of being intensely needed and absolutely possessed intertwined, making her mind in turmoil, as if her blood was flowing backward.
The sunlight gently shone on the two people embracing each other, and only his sleeping breathing and her own thunderous heartbeat could be heard in the secret room.
After an unknown amount of time, Gu Jinghong also fell asleep...
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