Chapter 18 Chapter 18
Los Angeles winters aren't cold. The plane landed at 10:30 AM, the sky clear and bright. Sunlight streamed through the window, casting a thin golden hue on Lia's eyelashes.
Wearing a mask and a baseball cap, she followed the crowd down the gangway, the familiar English announcement playing in her ears, occasionally interrupted by a few words of Spanish with a Mexican accent.
The air was a mixture of gasoline, sunlight, and the salty, humid air from the distant harbor, a familiar hallucination. The flight from Seoul to Los Angeles was nearly ten hours, and she had only slept for less than half of it.
She spent the rest of the flight watching an old Hong Kong film, which she picked up and watched intermittently. Stephen Chow's nonchalant laughter on the small screen helped her pass the difficult flight time.
The airport terminal hadn't changed much—it was still clean, efficient, and bright, just as she remembered it. The only thing that had changed was her.
Lia walked to the luggage carousel and saw her suitcase at first glance: the black shell was tied with a pink ribbon for easy identification.
That was something her mother had added to it before she went abroad, saying, "A black suitcase can easily be confused when you're traveling, so tying something colored will make it easier to distinguish."
She didn't take it seriously at that time, but now she suddenly realized that she had been quietly surrounded by such care.
The immigration process went more smoothly than she had expected. When she left the station, she spotted her mother standing outside the crowd, wearing a beige coat and waving at her.
"You've lost weight, honey." Her mother opened her arms and looked her over closely. "Didn't you eat well in Korea?" Lia gave her a light hug and replied, "I need to be thinner for camera, so I've been controlling my weight a bit."
She did not mention that "training was too hard" or "there was no time to eat." She always reported good news to her family but not bad news.
Moreover, it is difficult to describe the fatigue accurately - it is not the kind of tiredness that can be relieved by a good night's sleep. The body can move and the mind is clear, but the emotions are like being locked in a dark room, unable to see the light of day.
My mother took my luggage and handed me the thermos. "Have something hot, ginger and jujube tea." The car parked in a corner of the airport parking garage. As we drove out of the airport, old songs from the 1980s were playing on the car radio.
"Rest well for the next two days. I'll complete the paperwork on Monday." Her mother turned to look at her while steering. "I've prepared the social security and school district information. Don't worry."
"Yeah." Lia responded, holding the thermos cup in her palm, her fingers slowly warming up. The sun shone in through the window, and her shadow fell on the back door.
As the car sped onto the highway, familiar scenery passed by one by one. She leaned against the window, listening to her mother chat about the family's recent situation, and relaxed for the first time in a long time.
Early Monday morning, her mother took her to several places: the Social Security Bureau, the school district office, and the "Family Physician Physical Examination Center" that she hated the most when she was a child.
Although she repeatedly explained that the company arranges regular physical examinations for trainees every year, her mother still insisted that she go for a "comprehensive check-up."
The process was faster than expected, and all the formalities were completed by 2 p.m. She sat in the passenger seat, the document bag resting on her knees, her fingertips unconsciously rubbing along the edge of the plastic envelope.
Outside the window was a familiar intersection, a gas station, and a chain supermarket. Pickup trucks and mail trucks were parked at the traffic lights. Everything seemed the same, yet everything seemed different. "Remember when we went to language school here?" my mother suddenly asked.
"I remember." Lia looked sideways at her. "My Korean was much worse back then." "But I spoke English fluently," her mother joked. Lia smiled. "Maybe."
"Back then, you and Mina didn't go home after school. You always went to eat that Mexican taco that looked like a spring roll, and you even lied to me that it was a 'cultural experience'." "Mom, you actually still remember this..."
"Of course I remember. You're my daughter," the mother said with a smile. The car was silent for a moment, and then the mother suddenly changed her tone: "So, after staying in Korea for so long, have you made up your mind to become an artist?"
Lia lowered her head and fiddled with her fingers, not answering immediately. Her mother continued, "You don't have to make a decision this time. You've always had your own ideas, and as long as you don't regret it, I support you."
Lia stared at the taillights of the car in front of her, watching the red brake lights gradually light up. "I'm just..." she finally said, her voice low and slightly hoarse, "I'm not sure if I really like it."
The mother did not interrupt, but just nodded slightly and waited for her to continue.
"It's not that I don't want to work hard. I practice, write songs, and record videos every day. But the trainees around me, and the seniors who have already debuted, they all... really love the stage."
"The more people expect and see me, the more I have to make sure I can live up to that expectation. Otherwise, it feels like cheating." She paused, "I'm afraid I won't be able to respond."
She seemed to be deflated suddenly, and all the questions that had been lingering in her heart poured out all at once.
She didn't know how to deal with the love and expectations she received, even more than the verbal abuse. She didn't need to care about the former, but the latter meant responsibility and feedback, and she wasn't sure if she had enough faith to follow through.
She had seen that person on stage, so she knew better than ever that it wasn't a matter of "just trying hard." A gaze mingled with sincerity and love demanded an even more passionate and radiant response from the person on stage.
As the red light counted down, her mother reached out and gently patted her head: "Then wait until you have truly thought it through before moving forward. Don't be afraid to stop because of sunk costs, and don't be afraid to continue because of the fear of giving up." "You don't owe anyone anything."
Lia's eyes warmed. She said nothing, only nodded gently. The next day, Mina asked her to meet in the city.
They met at a dessert shop near the language school that had been open for many years. The decoration of the shop had hardly changed, and the red and green Christmas decorations had been hung up early.
Mina, wearing a leather jacket and dyed chestnut red hair, rushed over from a distance with her arms open. "I miss you so much! How is life in Korea? Do you have a boyfriend?"
Lia stumbled back a step after being bumped into by her. She smiled helplessly, "Of course not, or I would have told you long ago." Ever since she left for Korea, their contact had become less frequent. Busy with practice and schoolwork, she could only reply to the occasional MSN message.
"What about your new boyfriend? How is he doing now?"
"We've broken up!" Mina waved her hands carelessly. "I was going to text you, but it's been less than a month since I said we were in a relationship. It's so embarrassing. I think I'll wait until you come back." "Hey, why?"
"Don't mention it. He's handsome but super boring. He drags me to the library to memorize words every day... This is not how I planned my high school life!" She complained as she pulled Lia to find a seat by the window.
Lia propped up her chin: "I don't think he's that handsome."
"You're used to being around celebrities, so your taste is seriously inflated!" Mina glared at her. "Speaking of which, what about those handsome guys around you? There are so many big stars in YG. Even if they don't debut, they can still have a relationship, right?"
"I... I already told you I'm not planning on dating!" Lia raised her hands in surrender. "The company isn't as romantic as you think. I'm stuck in the practice room every day taking classes."
"You're lying." Mina didn't believe it. "I remember you mentioned GD Sunbaenim to me?" "You rarely talk about boys. I watched that variety show before. The look in his eyes was obviously different."
Lia lowered her head, scrambling her drink, a bit flustered. She subconsciously wanted to deny it, but for a moment, she couldn't say anything. "So, you really like him?" Mina, perceptive enough to catch her silence, pressed.
"No..." Lia looked up, her voice a little weak. "He's quite handsome," Mina said, her chin in her hand. "Although I like Youngbae the most in Bigbang, GD is really in a league of his own when it comes to temperament."
"Hmm..." Lia replied sullenly, "I'm actually not quite sure..." Whether she regarded him as an idol, a brother, or a boy she liked.
"What about him? Do you think he likes you?" Mina asked again. "I don't know..." Lia paused before saying, "It's just that... sometimes he says something that makes me think about it for a long time."
"But then I thought, how could that be possible? He's just... that kind of person." Lia fiddled with the cake on her plate with a fork, a look of confusion on her face. Compared to the boys his age around him, he seemed unpredictable.
In her limited experience, a boy's affection was the hardest thing to conceal. Whether it was letters, chocolates, or even winks and teasing during class, even a slow-witted girl could clearly pick up on these signals. But Quan Zhilong was different.
He had always been kind to her. He looked after her, treated her to meals, taught her how to write songs, and even sent her funny messages. But that kind of intimacy was more like the natural care and concern of a mature senior for a younger generation.
She occasionally couldn't help but feel that I was special. "He probably just treated me like a sister," she said, gently putting down her fork. "He treated me... well, but not in the 'love' kind of way."
"Then at least we can be sure that you like him." Mina tilted her head and looked at her: "Only if you really like someone will you spend time thinking so much. If it's just a brother or an idol, who would bother to distinguish these things?"
Lia was stunned, lowering her head and taking another sip of her drink. "And now doesn't mean it will be the future," Mina said softly. "He may really only see you as a sister now, but who knows what will happen in the future?"
"As long as we're in the same company, there will always be opportunities. Maybe you'll fall in love with someone else soon!" Mina winked at her, reassuring her. Lia smiled and nodded, trying to ignore the small hope in her heart.
In the future?... The sky outside the window gradually darkened, and her reflection was reflected on the glass - that face was no longer the same as it was a year ago.
----------
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
