If only my mom were still here.
Yu Chunsheng lowered his eyes, seemingly lost in thought. After a long while, he looked up, smiled, and gently flicked Xu Tangmian's nose before slowly saying:
"You're going to slap yourself for this? Why don't you take the train to Beiping and slap Xu Zhilian for me?"
"Did he really do it?" Xu Tangmian asked, her voice trembling and her hands shaking slightly.
"I don't know, I can't remember." Yu Chunsheng gently took her hand and placed it back on the bed, then covered it with his other hand and tightly enveloped her hand, saying in a steady and powerful voice, "We are husband and wife now, hitting you is hitting me."
He moved closer to her, leaned in and gently kissed her neck, then lowered his head to nuzzle her. He looked up at her with his amber eyes, a faint smile on his face.
"And you, I haven't even seen those photos, and you just went there all by yourself?"
"I don't know." Xu Tangmian's eyes were blank, the black and white photo flashing through her mind again. "I was just flipping through a book, the photo just appeared for a moment..."
"Alright, alright!" Yu Chunsheng interrupted her. "Can we stop thinking about it?"
Xu Tangmian nodded blankly, then fell silent.
The hospital corridor was filled with the sounds of voices and various instruments being pushed around. The two held hands, neither of them saying a word.
Xu Tangmian suddenly gave a self-deprecating laugh, lightly scratched his palm with her finger, and complained, "Really, pregnancy is supposed to be a happy thing, how did it turn out like this?"
"Happy, very happy," Yu Chunsheng said calmly, but his eyes showed no joy.
Xu Tangmian's initial reluctance to face him gradually turned into worry; she was unsure what Yu Chunsheng was thinking.
Logically speaking, shouldn't the husband be very happy when the couple has a child? She was indeed injured today, and Yu Chunsheng should be worried, but now that his worry has passed, why does he still look so listless?
The doctor told her to watch her emotions, so Xu Tangmian stopped trying to process it and asked him directly, "You seem unhappy. What are you thinking about?"
Yu Chunsheng clicked her tongue, her expression complex, much like the children in her class who couldn't solve math problems.
He hesitated, opening his mouth several times only to swallow it back, which made Xu Tangmian angry. So she simply turned her hand over and slapped the back of his hand.
"You're deliberately trying to annoy me." Xu Tangmian suddenly reverted to her former spoiled self, frowning as she said, "Why are you stammering? Speak up!"
Yu Chunsheng felt like crying and laughing at the same time. His brows furrowed slightly, but he grinned and asked her, "You said my career has just started, and I haven't even started making money yet. What is this child doing here? Why couldn't she pick a good day?"
He couldn't resist biting his finger, but Xu Tangmian slapped it down: "Hospitals are full of germs, don't put everything in your mouth!"
So Yu Chunsheng withdrew his hand, biting his lower lip until it was bloodless before letting go. Clenching his fist, he was puzzled but still tried to keep a smile as he asked her, "We...we both wore them..., didn't we?"
"Who knows?" Xu Tangmian said expressionlessly, arms crossed. "Maybe I'm carrying someone else's child."
"Stop fooling around." Yu Chunsheng bit his lip, thinking, "It was those times in Beiping, wasn't it?" He muttered to himself, "I told you we can't be so indulgent, but I still got pregnant."
Xu Tangmian grew increasingly annoyed and threw off the covers, ready to get out of bed: "If you don't like it, then hit me."
"No!" Yu Chunsheng immediately stood up from the bedside, frantically pressing her back onto the bed, then hurriedly letting go, afraid he had used too much force.
"No..." he pleaded again, "Don't hit it...don't hit it. I'm happy, I welcome it."
"You don't seem to welcome me." Xu Tangmian frowned. "Isn't money earned slowly? When did I ever think about divorce just because you don't have money?"
Upon hearing this, the two seemed to recall how Xu Tangmian had been constantly clamoring to return to Beiping since they had just gotten their marriage certificate.
Xu Tangmian was a little embarrassed, and her momentum instantly weakened, but she still stubbornly said, "I may say that, but when have I ever tried to run away because you were broke since we got together?"
“I know,” Yu Chunsheng nodded. “You’re very good, you’re very good… Money is only part of the reason. Of course I love my child, it’s just…”
His expression was somewhat indescribable, as if he had a lot to say. After a long while, he finally raised his head, looked at the ceiling, and let out a soft "ah," which sounded like a sigh or a murmur.
"If only my parents were here, they would definitely tell me what to do."
Tears welled up in his eyes, and fearing that his outburst would frighten Xu Tangmian, he quickly turned to the side and looked at the white walls of the hospital, scratching at the plaster with his hand in an attempt to ease the atmosphere: "But they'll be in their sixties or seventies by then, and it's uncertain who will take care of whom."
“Chunsheng…” Xu Tangmian had never seen him so helpless before, and couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. She reached out to pull him up.
"I'm fine." He breathed a sigh of relief and turned back. He instinctively wanted to bite his thumb, but then remembered that Xu Tangmian had just stopped him, so he quickly put it down. He held the hem of his clothes tightly with both hands and bit his lower lip hard.
"What should I do?" He forced back his tears, his eyes red and brimming with tears.
"I haven't even learned how to be a father yet, how come it's already here so impatiently?"
“Chunsheng,” Xu Tangmian patiently comforted him, “No one is born knowing how to be a parent; we all have to try.”
She released her hand and touched her lower abdomen. "I don't know how to be a good mother, but I thought it through very clearly when I was in Beiping. I need this child, this child that belongs to us."
Xu Tangmian carefully wiped away the tears on Yu Chunsheng's face and said softly, "You always say that the things of the past life should be left in the past, and I also said that I am no longer Xu Tongtong, but we both know that neither of us has forgotten."
"Let's consider this child as an act of atonement, okay? Let's turn the page and start from here."
"This is Yu Chunsheng and Xu Tangmian's child. They will dedicate the rest of their lives to the happiness of this child. Do you agree?"
Yu Chunsheng nodded blankly, wiped away his tears, and paced back and forth, saying, "But the printing factory we took over has already used up all the gold bars, and we can't stop. I'm sure there are some shortcomings in how I take care of you."
“I’m an adult, I can take care of myself,” Xu Tangmian was still trying to reassure him.
"No, no, I need to find someone. I can't handle this by myself." He paced back and forth, muttering to himself, "How about I call Sister Youlan over? She's been a mother, she can definitely help you."
Xu Tangmian looked helpless: "Big sister, she has her own family and career. Why are you bothering her with this little thing?"
“I’m scared…” Yu Chunsheng squatted down beside her bed. “How can you manage without someone knowledgeable by your side? Even if Song Weidong knows medicine, it’s not convenient for a grown man like him, is it?”
“You need someone by your side who can impart their experience,” Yu Chunsheng said firmly. “Even if I don’t let Sister Youlan come, I’ll find a nanny to take care of you with me. I’m really not at ease leaving you alone.”
Xu Tangmian was also unsure of what to do. She understood Yu Chunsheng's meaning; there was a lot to learn about pregnancy over ten months. While a smooth pregnancy was ideal, prenatal checkups, precautions for pregnant women, childbirth—the entire process involved countless details, and even if they learned everything from scratch, they couldn't guarantee a perfect outcome.
Having someone who has given birth is like having a pillar of support. Even if that person doesn't have to do anything, but just gives orders, that's enough.
If Yu Chunsheng's mother were still alive, she would be the best candidate, but neither of them belonged to this era, and neither of their parents were here.
She had only tried to comfort Yu Chunsheng because she saw him on the verge of a breakdown. After calming down, she realized that she had a little life inside her and panicked too!
Xu Tangmian's eyes stung, and she couldn't help but cry.
"It's all your fault, you bastard! You made me panic!" she cried and cursed.
Yu Chunsheng rushed over to comfort her, but in doing so, he became depressed himself. The couple ended up hugging and crying together in the hospital room.
The doctor by the roadside shook his head and muttered, "They're just young people after all."
——
Xu Tangmian didn't like the smell of disinfectant, so she went home after the slap marks on her face disappeared.
The journey was bumpy, and Yu Chunsheng was afraid that Xu Tangmian might get hurt, so he hailed a taxi to take her back and followed behind on his bicycle.
There's only one bus in the village that runs every half hour, and taxis almost never come. As soon as a bus stops, the people at the convenience store automatically turn on their magnifying glasses and start gossiping again.
The bus stop was located right in front of the brigade headquarters, which was also the clinic. Fearing that the driver wouldn't know where to stop, Yu Chunsheng specifically instructed the bus to stop there.
Bicycles are slower than taxis, and Xu Tangmian chatted with Li Yutao at the clinic for quite a while before Yu Chunsheng finally arrived.
Upon seeing Xu Tangmian and Li Yutao standing by the wall, Yu Chunsheng quickly walked over and said anxiously, "It's so windy here, why don't you go inside and sit down?"
"I can't stand that smell."
"Why don't you bring out a stool? How long have you been standing?"
"Not long, just a little while. Oh, stop nagging, I'm having a chat."
Li Yutao, unable to bear the two of them being so affectionate, casually swung her arm and went back into the house. She walked to the opposite side of Song Weidong, plopped down, crossed her legs, and teased, "Oh really, everyone has someone who dotes on them. My boyfriend is such a busy man."
Song Weidong was taking someone's blood pressure when he heard this and said with a smile, "Alright, stop nagging. I'll talk to Lao Xu this afternoon and we can go to the movies together, okay?"
"That's more like it." Li Yutao pouted, but when she saw the two people outside gazing at each other affectionately, she couldn't stand it anymore. After saying "Hey" twice, she laughed and said, "You two are really enough. Please go home immediately and do what you need to do."
Yu Chunsheng's eyes sparkled. "Did you tell them?"
Xu Tangmian shook her head.
How could I possibly bring this up? Wouldn't that be tantamount to announcing to the whole world what they did a month ago?
Seeing that she was really embarrassed, Yu Chunsheng readily said, "Okay, I'll explain."
He strode into the clinic, but upon seeing other patients in the room, he suddenly found himself speechless.
When he turned around, Xu Tangmian was looking at him teasingly.
After Song Weidong finished measuring the blood pressure and put the device away, he respectfully placed his arms on the table and asked with a smile, "Is there something you need?"
Suddenly, he realized that Yu Chunsheng's expression seemed familiar, so he turned down the volume with a strange look and frowned, saying, "You're not taking that out in broad daylight again, are you...? If you guys have nothing better to do, can't you go for a walk?"
Yu Chunsheng hissed, picked up the medical record from the table, and threw it at his lap. "What are you saying!"
"So what do you want to say? Just say it. What kind of relationship do we have?"
After calling Song Weidong out, Yu Chunsheng got straight to the point: "Do you have your uncle's mailing address? I want to send them a telegram."
"Is it about the printing factory?" Song Weidong nodded. "I'll write down the address for you right away. They should be coming back in a while. This year, it's not like it's related to you..."
Song Weidong smiled and said, "They plan to spend the Chinese New Year here this year. They even asked me to buy a big table for your family so they can bring Zhi Meizi over to celebrate the New Year together."
"That's great," Yu Chunsheng said casually. "But I'll have to ask you to come and cook for us again this Chinese New Year."
Song Weidong's expression changed: "What are you up to? Are you treating me like a servant?"
Yu Chunsheng smiled and said, "Tangtang should be showing around the New Year and won't be able to do heavy work. I won't be able to manage the kitchen by myself then."
"What?" Song Weidong looked at Xu Tangmian beside him, his face full of surprise. "You're pregnant?"
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