Chapter 107

"If you were a shrew, there would be no shrews in the world." Xu Wen shook her head. She really didn't think Song Baoying was a shrew.

According to Song Baoying's personality, she would not tell others about these things between them.

This outsider should also include her and Lu Yuanzheng.

Yesterday was an accident, which touched Song Baoying's most fragile nerve and caused her to suddenly collapse.

I guess Xu Wen had already seen her ugly side and knew that she had problems with Shi Lei, so he said those words to her today.

Otherwise, she would have continued to maintain the appearance of harmony and happiness between husband and wife.

Song Baoying said nothing.

Xu Wen continued, "In the past year since I came here, I have seen Instructor Shi cry at least three times."

She stretched out her hand and made an OK sign, indicating three fingers standing upright.

Song Baoying suddenly looked up at Xu Wen, as if she couldn't believe what she heard.

Xu Wen nodded with a smile, "Every time I cry, it's because of you."

"Because of me? What's wrong with me?" Song Baoying asked herself that she had fulfilled her responsibilities as a wife. Even if the feelings were gone, she didn't say how to torture Shi Lei, so why did she go to someone else's house and cry?

Her face and eyes were full of confusion.

"Instructor Shi is always laughing and seems to have nothing on his mind. But when he mentions that he couldn't go home to give birth to your child, he feels so sorry for you! He says that you are the one he feels most sorry for in his life. He says that he couldn't be with you when you had a difficult birth. Especially after drinking a little, he will cry when he mentions you and your daughter."

Song Baoying was stunned. "Did he really say that? And he cried?"

"Yes!" Xu Wen was quite puzzled when he heard Song Baoying complaining just now. Why did she think Shi Lei would be indifferent to her grievances?

Song Baoying stammered, "He didn't! He never says such things at home! Not to mention shedding tears."

"But I will talk about it here. I will talk about the pain and grievance you suffered when giving birth. I will say that it is difficult for you to work alone at home and take care of the elderly and children. Other things are fine, but every time I talk about your giving birth, my eyes will instantly turn red." Xu Wen did not lie. Maybe it is what is called telling your true feelings to strangers and quarreling with familiar people.

Although it seems that they don't even quarrel anymore.

Song Baoying had never seen it, and for a moment she couldn't imagine the scene of Shi Lei crying because of his heartache and guilt for her.

Xu Wen carefully looked at her expression and continued, "Actually, you still care about Instructor Shi, right?"

Song Baoying pursed her lips and shook her head, "Why do you care about him?"

I must have cared about it before, but after being disappointed again and again, I don’t care anymore.

Every time she needed him, he was not there.

"Then I'll change the words." Xu Wen saw that she was resistant to his saying good things about Shi Lei, so he changed the question, "Are you willing? Are you willing to treat each other with respect until old age? You are only in your thirties, and you are only halfway through your life. You and Instructor Shi started out in love but you didn't really get love. I believe that when you got married, you definitely didn't think that your married life would be a mess, with endless mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflicts to deal with, and children who would always have new problems. But what about you? Have you ever gotten it?"

Song Baoying repeated in a daze: "Am I willing?" She shook her head, "How can I be willing?"

The marriage she longed for was to be able to see Shi Lei's peaceful profile every morning when she opened her eyes, to sit across from him at the table and eat quietly together, and to walk together hand in hand in the evening.

When she was pregnant, he was by her side, welcoming the baby together and accompanying the baby as he grew up.

He was the one holding the child and holding her hand, and the family of three lived in harmony.

Instead, she was like a living widow, taking care of her parents-in-law who did not need care but were always finding fault, and accompanying her children's growth alone.

"Since you are unwilling to give up, why not try to let go of the past and start over?" Xu Wen coaxed softly, feeling like a witch who encouraged a good girl to do bad things.

But Song Baoying was not tempted. She shook her head and said, "You said it all. I'm in my thirties. Where can I start over? We're an old couple with grown children. How can we start over? The past is the past!"

"What's wrong with being in your thirties? Thirty is the most beautiful time of life! Starting over means you don't have to think about your old married life anymore. Just pretend the past ten years didn't exist and get to know him again."

"What's the difference? Aren't our lives the same? No matter how well we know each other, he's on the island and I'm at home. We can only write to each other ten times a year at most, but we're still a couple in name only."

"So, you have to try to change! Instructor Shi's job is here, he can't change. But you can. You come to the island and live together as a family of three. Then you can realize what you just said, walking hand in hand on the beach, with him holding the child and you holding his hand."

"Ah?" Song Baoying hesitated for a moment, then shook her head. "No! Let's not talk about whether my family elders will agree to my resignation. Even if everyone in my family agrees and I am willing, it still won't work. Wenwen is in primary school! There is no school here. We can't let this matter between adults delay the child's study, right?"

Now that she is able to take the college entrance exam, Song Baoying is unwilling to delay her child's studies, as that is her child's future.

"Look! You always put others first. You always think about others first. This kind of giving personality can gain a lot of emotion in a short period of time, but over time, others will take your efforts for granted.

The child will grow up. She is the fruit of love, not the bondage or end of love. You must first solve the problem with Teacher Shi before you can give your child a happy growth environment!

In my opinion, the relationship between husband and wife is higher than all other family relationships and ranks first. Only when the relationship between husband and wife is harmonious can the relationship between parents and children and family relationships be harmonious.

As for the issue of children going to school... I do have an immature suggestion."

Song Baoying thought about it carefully and felt that what Xu Wen said was particularly right.

If the husband and wife get along well, there will be fewer conflicts between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law.

The mother-in-law knows that it is useless to act like a demon, and the daughter-in-law Yuan will treat her mother-in-law better for the sake of her husband.

Instead of the current situation, she is like a free servant living under someone else's roof at home.

Being always ordered around by her mother-in-law, doesn't she feel that Shi Lei doesn't care about her?

After a while, Song Baoying almost sighed and said, "I finally understand why everyone on this island, whether it's a soldier or a sister-in-law, whether it's an adult or a child, always looks at you with admiration! I've lived for more than 30 years, and I've never seen a wonderful person like you! Sister-in-law, tell me what other tricks you have to solve the child problem?"

"What good plan do you have?" Xu Wen didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "Sister-in-law, you put me on such a high pedestal that I dare not say a word. In fact, it's very simple. You are a teacher, right? It's not difficult for you to do the school stuff. You have more than ten years of teaching experience, so it shouldn't be difficult for you to be the principal of a primary school, right?"

"Ah?" Song Baoying was unable to follow Xu Wen's train of thought for a moment, "What principal?" How could they discuss becoming a principal when there isn't even a school?

Xu Wen put the milk tea back on the coffee table, changed himself into a comfortable position and leaned against the sofa, and said to Song Baoying seriously: "In fact, I have had this idea for a long time, and I have discussed it with Lu Yuanzheng and others before. It's just that I haven't found the right person.

Sister-in-law, you know there are many sisters-in-law who are facing the same situation as you. The benefits provided by the army to the wives of soldiers are already very good. If there are no elderly people at home who need constant care, you can still consider going to the island for family reunion.

Most of the sisters-in-law who come now bring their preschool children. There are also many sisters-in-law who want to come but cannot come because they are worried about their children not being able to go to school. But what if the problem of schooling is solved? "

Song Baoying was stunned, thought for a moment, and said, "Then this island should become more and more lively and popular, right?"

"That's just one aspect. Long-distance relationships are always tormenting. Whether it's a couple or a family of three or four, they are together. One can work with peace of mind, and the other can manage the household. It reduces conflicts between couples. This is a good thing!"

Xu Wen pointed to the huge map of the island on the wall opposite the coffee table and said, "Sister-in-law, look over there... Lu Yuanzheng and Instructor Shi have already planned the location of the school and are waiting for future construction.

But they can build schools but not teach. This island is in need of a particularly experienced elementary school principal. I think you are a good fit."

Song Baoying stood up and walked to the map.

When I first saw it, I was wondering what it was about, but it turned out to be a map of the island.

It’s not quite right to call it a map; it’s more like a painting.

It looks very beautiful when hung on the main wall.

The entire map was hand-drawn, with dense markings on it, almost in meters, indicating the soil quality, use, and future plans.

She saw the word "school" at a glance.

The place chosen by Lu Yuanzheng looks very clean and has a good location.

At present, it seems a bit far from the camp and the family building, but it is in the center of the family area and the future village, so that the children on the island can go to the same school.

She raised her hand and gently stroked the mark of the elementary school.

Xu Wen stood up and walked to her side. "Sister-in-law, I know you are now a key teacher in the school, and your salary should not be low. If you are willing to stay on the island to teach, in addition to the 10 yuan monthly military allowance, you should be able to apply for a part of your salary."

Song Baoying shook her head. "It's not about the salary. I eat and drink here at the army's expense, so it's my responsibility to teach the soldiers' children and make things convenient for myself. But I can't go to elementary school like Wang Ying's wife teaches children. It's unrealistic for me to be the only teacher in a formal school building."

Whether it is Xu Wen or Wang Ying, they can teach all preschool children like a group of sheep.

But elementary school is different. There are several grades in elementary school. She can't take a class here and another class there, right?

The children in every class do not learn well.

Xu Wen had also thought about this question, and she nodded in agreement: "I know. We can slowly solve the talent problem. When the island is really built, we can hire professional teachers from outside. But for now, we can only be self-sufficient. What I mean is that you will be the principal and formulate a teaching plan based on the teaching materials from outside. As for teaching materials, it is not difficult to purchase them twice a year. The most troublesome thing is the problem of teachers, and I think my sisters-in-law have to do this themselves.

I will sign up first. In addition, Jiang Yiyi and Wang Ying, two sisters-in-law, can also teach primary school. It seems that several sisters-in-law also have high school or technical secondary school education. But we are not from professional backgrounds and have never been teachers. You have to take the helm. It would be best if you could give us some pre-job training. That is, before the formal class, teach us how to write on the blackboard, how to prepare lessons, and what teaching methods children like the most.

It’s okay if we’re short of a teacher, we can have one person in charge of two grades or one person teach two subjects.”

Song Baoying's eyes flashed.

She thought she would just live like this until she grew old.

But Xu Wen pointed her to another way.

This path allows me to continue being her teacher and at the same time our family of three can be reunited without being separated.

My parents-in-law are still in good health, and my aunt and brother-in-law are taking care of me at home.

You can definitely stay on the island.

She had no interest in staying on the island before, but now she admitted that she was moved by what Xu Wen said.

Can the dream from ten years ago come true?

But can a relationship that has been worn out for ten years still exist?

It's easy for her to quit, but if she fails, she will go home with nothing.

Song Baoying was a little hesitant, her anticipation and excitement mixed with her feelings for Shi Lei and her lack of confidence in herself.

Xu Wen knew that it would be difficult to let go of her hatred for Shi Lei as her life habits of so many years had been overturned all of a sudden.

Yes, she felt that Song Baoying hated Shi Lei.

Some hatred does not necessarily involve gnashing of teeth.

Because the opposite of love is hate, and the opposite of hate... is indifference.

Song Baoying took a deep breath and said, "Give me two days. I need to think about it carefully."

Anyway, Shi Lei will definitely be too busy to finish his work in two days, and they won't be able to leave the island for a while.

Xu Wen nodded.

Song Baoying looked at Xu Wen and hesitated.

"Sister-in-law, just ask whatever you want to ask." Xu Wen said with a faint smile, motioning Song Baoying to sit down.

Song Baoying liked the bean bag very much and sat back on it.

Xu Wen sat on the rocking chair in front of the bed, looking at the beach.

There were fewer and fewer people on the beach. Most of the new recruits and soldiers who were about to take turns had gone back to rest. Only a few old soldiers, retired veterans and two chief officers were left.

"Sister-in-law. Did you give up college and come here just because you didn't want to be separated from Lu Ying?"

Xu Wen nodded, then shook his head: "I haven't given up college, I'm still a college student. I'm not affecting my studies by coming to accompany him. It sounds like I've sacrificed a lot for him, but in fact I just spend less time with my classmates. Just think of it as a vacation while accompanying him."

"That's not true! University life is nothing compared to life on the island..." Song Baoying stopped talking halfway, thinking that this was a bit of a divisive move, and changed the question: "Don't you feel wronged?"

Although there are better options, he insisted on coming to the island to suffer.

"No!" Xu Wen answered calmly, smiling happily, and raised his hand to gesture to his own home, "Look at my residence and food, how can it be said that I am putting myself in a difficult position?"

Song Baoying didn't know what to say.

Obviously he should feel aggrieved, but Xu Wen really feels like he is on vacation here.

But no matter how comfortable the days are, they cannot withstand the long periods of loneliness.

Xu Wen knew what Song Baoying meant, and after thinking for a while, he said, "I know that many sisters-in-law feel wronged. I also know that their profession is respected. It is said that the military medal is half his and half the sisters-in-law. But in fact, most people will ignore the contributions of the military wives."

Even long after that, there were windows with priority for military personnel and scenic spots where military personnel had free admission.

There is no priority or free tickets for military wives.

"Sister-in-law, do you know Sister Li?"

Song Baoying nodded, "I know him, but not very well."

Because she seldom came to the compound, we only had meals together once or twice by chance.

"When I first arrived at the compound, Sister Li said something to me, and I still remember it." Xu Wen walked back to the tea table, picked up his milk tea and added two spoonfuls of ice. "She said that when she met Squad Leader Lu, he was the only soldier. The moment she accepted Squad Leader Lu, she was ready to be a soldier's wife. Everyone knows that being a soldier's wife is hard and tiring. It is obviously a marriage between two people, but it is forced to be a marriage of one person, and one has to be prepared for the man to sacrifice at any time.

But she just likes squad leader Lu, likes him so much that she is willing to do the job even though she knows it is very hard, and she will never complain no matter what squad leader Lu does. Because squad leader Lu's job has too many frustrations.

It's not that he didn't want to accompany her, nor did he not want to tell her where he was going, and he didn't want her to be afraid all day. But he had a more important mission. So Sister Li always said that when she was with Captain Lu, she always treated every day they spent together as if it were the last day.

Last year, squad leader Lu died on this island. Sister Li came to this island with us. She has no connection with the army anymore. She stayed here to accompany squad leader Lu. Compared to them, aren't we lucky?

At least love him or hate him! He is still here."

Song Baoying opened her mouth, with shock evident in her eyes.

After a long moment, Song Baoying smiled bitterly, "Compared with Sister Li, I am ashamed. When I first met Shi Lei, he was also a soldier. But I don't have the same awareness as Sister Li. Maybe this is why I live a more miserable life than Sister Li?"

Xu Wen didn't say anything.

Most people only saw how cool the green clothes were and how tall and handsome they looked in them.

You can't see the tears and blood flowing from the wounds under the clothes.

Having a boyfriend who is a soldier gives you a sense of security, but few people really consider the sacrifices involved.

Most girls would be like Song Baoying, who only imagined the beauty of marrying Shi Lei, but never thought about the responsibilities, obligations and pains that would come with marrying him.

"The reason is not important. Life is so long, you still have the opportunity to choose again, right? You can give up on life, or you can choose another way.

If you have time, go to the canteen and talk to Mrs. Li more often. I think your worries will be solved. "Xu Wen suggested, "There are many things we can learn from her."

Song Baoying nodded, and she took a deep breath, "I think I don't need to think about it. I want to stay on the island. I can imagine life on the island until I grow old, but I can't imagine life here for even a second.

I admire Mrs. Li and I envy you. I want to learn from you.

Don't be afraid of you laughing at me, but when I was at my saddest last night, I had thoughts of committing suicide. It's only been a day, and I've only chatted with you for a while, but I'm actually starting to look forward to it. Maybe Shi Lei and I can get back the feeling we had before."