Chapter 80 Takagami Shock: Don't Blame Him for Using Unscrupulous Methods Anymore
Shen Yan thought she would have to be very well-behaved to be allowed to stay at Jingyuan Residence.
However, Lin Shutang readily agreed, which was a pleasant surprise for Shen Yan, who had spent the whole day wandering around Jingyuanju with her little bag.
Even though he didn't realize why it seemed that only by being obedient enough could he receive a little bit of love from his mother.
But the joy of being able to stay at Jingyuan Residence and be close to his mother every day was enough for him to put all these things to the back of his mind.
Lin Shutang would take him to tinker in the wooden house, and knowing that he liked the rattle drum, she made a new one for him.
Others' toys were all bought from the street, but Chenyan's toys were made by his mother, and he loved them dearly.
As winter approaches in Yujing, the weather is unusually sunny. The recent bright sunshine has dispelled much of the chill in the air.
The time I spent with my mother at Jingyuan Residence was fulfilling, but it was ultimately just one small space, and I soon grew tired of it and felt bored.
Lin Shutang then took him for a stroll inside the Duke's mansion.
Lin Shutang herself didn't seem to be very familiar with the Duke's Mansion. She had been staying in Jingyuan Residence for more than three years. Not to mention that she had never finished exploring the Duke's Mansion, she didn't even recognize all the people there.
He said he would take Shen Yan out of the yard for a stroll, but all he knew was to walk around in the garden.
He had just been discharged from the hospital when he unexpectedly received a visiting card from Zhao Mingzhu, who said she wanted to meet Lin Shutang.
Lin Shutang wasn't surprised, because a while ago, when she was making toys for Shen Yan, she also made some decorative items for Zhao Mingzhu.
She will be leaving Yujing next year, and Zhao Mingzhu is one of the few friends she has had over the years.
They've come to the manor now, probably to act as a lobbyist for Shen Yun.
Lin Shutang's mind was made up, and he would not be swayed by Zhao Mingzhu's few words, so there was no harm in meeting her again.
The two rarely met outside of Jingyuan Residence. Shen Yan, watched over by servants and old women, wandered through the flower garden. Lin Shutang chose a pavilion to sit in. After the servants served hot tea and snacks, they withdrew, and his personal maid, Luwu, was sent to wait under the rockery.
It had been almost a year since the two last parted ways, but they didn't seem like strangers when they met again.
Zhao Mingzhu took a sip of tea and said with a hint of reproach, "If I hadn't asked you, when were you planning to tell me?"
Zhao Mingzhu was a perceptive person. Although the two of them rarely exchanged letters, she still sensed something was amiss between the lines.
"Ji Huaiyi said that things would not be peaceful in Yujing recently, so I haven't come to visit. If I hadn't asked, I probably wouldn't have found out until after you left next year."
At this point, Zhao Mingzhu did feel somewhat resentful.
Upon hearing this, Lin Shutang couldn't help but feel a little sad. She had, of course, given her heart to Zhao Mingzhu.
However, she was not one of them. Zhao Mingzhu treated her very well, but this kindness was because of Ji Huaiyi, and Ji Huaiyi was because of Shen Yun.
In this capital city, no one paid any attention to her because she was Lin Shutang; all people saw was that she was the wife of the Duke's heir.
Therefore, even Zhao Mingzhu always tried to persuade her to stay, and no one ever asked what Lin Shutang wanted or what she was unwilling to accept.
Lin Shutang remained silent, her eyes lowered, fiddling with the dress on her knees.
Zhao Mingzhu put down her teacup and sighed, "Do you really have to leave?"
She asked another question.
"Are you still holding a grudge... about... those people the Crown Prince killed back then?"
Seeing that Lin Shutang remained silent, Zhao Mingzhu became somewhat anxious. After thinking for a moment, she decided to get straight to the point.
Lin Shutang suddenly raised her head, her eyes flashing with shock. She didn't know how Zhao Mingzhu knew these things, but since she already knew, how could she so easily ask her to forgive and persuade her to stay?
Thinking of this, Lin Shutang's eyes welled up with tears again, and she even had trouble breathing.
She didn't want to think about those things; even just mentioning them felt like a sharp blade was reopening her wounds.
Zhao Mingzhu knew that it was somewhat cruel to say such things, but there were some things she felt Lin Shutang should know.
She held Lin Shutang's hand in her palm and found that even with the brazier burning, her palm was still terribly cold. "There is something I need to tell you, something you should at least know before you leave."
Lin Shutang looked up at her, a hint of suspicion in her eyes. She didn't think Zhao Mingzhu could say anything to shake her resolve to leave, and even if she listened, it wouldn't hurt. But a voice in her heart was frantically telling her to leave.
The louder the voice shouted, the deeper her feet seemed to sink into the ground.
When she heard those words coming from Zhao Mingzhu's mouth, her ears suddenly buzzed, as if a million flying ants had crawled into her brain.
Lin Shutang never imagined that her senior brother's actions would one day lead to utter destruction. All the high walls she had built crumbled; her pain, resentment, and despair suddenly seemed to lose their footing and crumbled into pieces. The principles she had always upheld were now teetering on the brink of collapse…
Lin Shutang didn't know how long he had been sitting there, nor when Zhao Mingzhu had left.
She just stared blankly at her feet, watching the sunlight gradually fade along the hem of her skirt, until finally the area under the pavilion became desolate.
Before me lay a gray, misty expanse. The wind howled from all sides beneath the pavilion high above, and without the protection of daylight, the howling wind sounded like the low growl of some wild beast.
Without Lin Shutang's instructions, Lvwu and the others did not dare to go forward to call her, and could only wait quietly at the foot of the steps.
It was a very long time before Lin Shutang finally got up from the pavilion. She slowly walked down the steps, with servants on both sides going in the opposite direction to hang lanterns.
She looked completely lost, as if she couldn't see these people at all. Even when Green Willow called to her, she walked slowly ahead as if in a daze.
Every step felt unsteady and lacked solidity.
Shen Yan was led by Lvwu and quietly followed behind Lin Shutang.
Even without Aunt Green Willow's prompting, he could sense the difference between his mother's current state and that of the daytime. Sui didn't dare to say anything, and just obediently lowered his head and walked on Lin Shutang's slender shadow.
The journey was silent, but Lin Shutang felt as if she were in a battle between heaven and earth.
She walked towards Jingyuan Residence unconsciously, like a fledgling bird that had lost its way and could only rely on instinct.
She didn't know what to do, who to see, or what to say. When she returned to Jingyuan Residence in a daze, she turned the corner of the hanging flower gate and looked up to see a person standing in the courtyard.
It was dark all around, and no lights were on in the courtyard. The figure was tall and aloof, but the shadow he cast was lonely and trembling.
Hearing the sound, he turned around. The two of them were hidden in the swaying shade of the trees, separated by a great distance.
He keenly sensed that Lin Shutang was not in a good mood, so he dared not approach her without permission.
Whenever he returned to the manor, he would go straight to Jingyuan Residence.
Every day he would stop for a while in front of the wooden house and see Lin Shutang with her head down, and she was more patient with Shen Yan than before.
Sometimes he would hold Chen Yan in front of him and show him the intricacies of the toys one by one.
Sometimes he even had the illusion that she had already forgiven him, and that this kind of life would continue forever.
To this day, he has searched every room, but he still cannot find her.
He was alarmed, wondering if she couldn't even wait one winter and had run away again.
He should bring her back!
But in that instant, amidst immense fear and anger, he unexpectedly felt a surge of joy and excitement.
She was the one who wanted to leave, she was the one who broke their promise, so don't blame him for resorting to any means necessary.
He had every reason to bring her back and then legitimately keep her trapped.
She could no longer resist him.
He watched her walk in, watched her slender figure fall to the ground.
The lights under the corridor lit up one by one, and in the bright light, her figure became ethereal, as if shrouded in a thin mist.
He suddenly felt an urge to pull her into his arms and keep her locked away in Jingyuan Residence forever.
He discovered that he actually couldn't let go at all.
His hands, hidden beneath his sleeves, clenched into fists, the veins on the pale back of his hands bulging, trembling uncontrollably.
He forced out a single, unremarkable syllable, monotonous and detached, like a stranger: "I'm back."
Lin Shutang looked up at him, his lowered eyelids concealing most of the emotions in his eyes. His dark eyes were like a deep pool in the dark night. His expression was calm, and he simply asked a question.
She seemed to snap out of her daze, let out a deep breath, hummed in agreement, and walked past him without saying another word, just as she always did.
She walked straight to the main room, pushed open the door and went inside, without even eating.
Shen Yun withdrew her gaze. Behind her, Lvwu and the others knelt in the courtyard, hurriedly saying in a trembling voice, "This is how it is after Madam met Madam Zhao today."
Perhaps Madam Zhao said something...
Green Willow dared not say more about this, but Shen Yun naturally understood.
He frowned slightly and instructed someone to cook some porridge for Lin Shutang, making sure she ate some.
Thinking about what would happen tonight, Shen Yun originally planned to go in and take another look at her, but thinking that she probably wouldn't want to see him, he gave up.
Looking towards the horizon, everything will eventually settle down.
The city of Yujing was awakened by the sound of horses' hooves, and the towering flames dyed half of the sky red.
Every household kept their doors and windows closed, and even the most curious dared not open them.
The candlelight in Shen Yun's study went out. He left the room and received a secret report from Ying Xiao: the Third Prince's men had breached the East and South Gates and were now inside the palace.
The door to the main room behind her was suddenly opened. Shen Yun subconsciously stopped and turned around to look. Lin Shutang was standing in front of the door, wearing a sky-blue dress and a hairpin in her shaved head. She was not asleep either.
He raised his eyebrows slightly, and the two were separated by the dim light of the fire. He waited for her to say something, and Lin Shutang pursed her lips slightly, "Tomorrow is the winter solstice."
It carries the implication of reunion; he understood what she had left unsaid.
Shen Yun nodded, a smile flickering across her face, but then she abruptly slammed the door shut.
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