Chapter 15, Section Six: "Therefore, you are nearly fifty years old and hold the official rank of seventh grade..."
The next day, Feng Tan finally got to eat the plum blossom pastry. Fuluzhai's plum blossom pastry is made from plum blossoms picked in the plum groves on the outskirts of Beijing. In winter, when the plum blossoms are in full bloom, the freshly picked plum blossoms are made into pastries. The pink pastry wraps the red bean filling, and with Fuluzhai's unique baking method, the taste is sweet and not greasy, and the aftertaste is endless.
Feng Tan took a bite and looked at the seven young women at the table who were staring at her intently. She said, "Sisters, if you keep looking at me like that, I won't dare to eat anymore." Zhan Niang, who was sitting to Feng Tan's left, pushed the small plate of plum blossom pastries towards Feng Tan and said, "What's there to be shy about? Eat up!"
Yao Niang reached out and poured a glass of water, handing it to Feng Tan. "Here, don't choke, drink some hot spring water!"
Seeing this, the other ladies all moved the snacks and treats they had made closer to Feng Tan.
"Try my pear blossom pancakes, even Boss Ren praised my skills!"
"Try my little pear soup first, Brother Feng has already had some snacks!"
"If you ask me, breakfast should include some porridge. I've been cooking this porridge all night, Brother Feng, come and have a taste!"
The seven ladies were all so enthusiastic that Feng Tan couldn't refuse them all, and not wanting to disappoint them, she had no choice but to try a bite of each.
Li Niang brought over the official robes that Feng Tan was supposed to wear for his shift. Looking at the scene before her, she frowned and said, "Stop torturing Brother Feng. His shift is almost over. All of you go out and let him change into his official robes!"
Yao Niang said to Feng Tan, "Brother Feng is injured, let me help you!"
Li Niang's beautiful eyes widened in displeasure, and she resorted to her ultimate weapon to intimidate them, "I'll count to three, and if you don't leave by then, I'm going to call Ren Pingsheng!"
"One!" As soon as Li Niang finished speaking, the seven women quickly got up from the table, no longer daring to utter a sound, and hurriedly ran out of the room.
"Don't find them annoying, Brother Feng." Li Niang touched Feng Tan's forehead and smiled. "His fever has gone down. It was worth taking care of him all night without changing his clothes. Hurry up and change your clothes. Meng He Nabuer is waiting downstairs."
Feng Tan took the clothes and put them on. Li Niang then handed her the scrolls that Ren Pingsheng had organized the night before, saying, "Boss Ren instructed me to give them to you personally."
Feng Tan packed up his things, said goodbye to Liniang, and went to the Six Departments Corridor to take his shift.
***
Since both the Grand Secretariat and the Six Ministries were directly responsible to the Emperor, the offices of the Six Ministries, in addition to the Grand Secretariat, were also located within the palace city. To the right of the Meridian Gate, past the Gate of Meeting the Ultimate, was the Grand Secretariat; to the left, past the Gate of Returning to the Ultimate, was the Six Ministries.
The officials of the Six Ministries of the Dahuang Dynasty were each headed by a Censor of the seventh rank and a Censor of the seventh rank, who were in charge of attending to the emperor, advising him, and investigating the affairs of the Six Ministries and other departments. For any decision, the Grand Secretariat would first draft a resolution, which would then be approved by the eunuchs and issued in the name of the emperor. The Six Ministries had the right to return the draft to the emperor during the signing process.
Yesterday was a day off, and today, the officials of the Six Ministries did not rush to work after their roll call at the Six Ministries Hall. Instead, they chatted enthusiastically around Hang Yuanting, the Supervising Secretary of the Ministry of War.
Jin An, a burly and robust official in the Ministry of Revenue, stretched lazily and asked Hang Yuanting, "Brother Yuanting, I've heard that demons and monsters roam the waters off Linzhang. On your journey to the army to record your achievements, have you encountered any strange or unusual monsters?"
The Linzhang sea area is located on the southern frontier, and many strange tales and legends have been passed down in Dahuang. Jin'an also deeply believes in ghosts and gods. Hang Yuanting has accompanied the army on this expedition to supervise the inspection. What he has seen and heard along the way must have been extraordinary. As soon as he asked this question, the other officials also listened attentively.
Hang Yuanting, with a long beard and small eyes, couldn't hide the shrewdness in them. "The army didn't venture deep into the Linzhang sea area; they only fought along the coast. With artillery fire raging, how could I have the mood to observe the local customs and culture? However, there are a few legends circulating in the Linzhang sea area..."
The two censors from the Ministry of Works and the Ministry of Personnel said in unison, "Tell us about it!"
Hang Yuanting whetted his colleagues' appetites before saying, "Indeed, there are demons in the waters off Linzhang! These demons are originally fish, but after coming ashore, they grow legs, walk with a graceful gait, and are as beautiful as celestial beings. They devour the essence of men!"
Upon hearing this, Jin An immediately sat up straight in his chair, his narrow eyes gleaming with undisguised brilliance. "Isn't this a mermaid?! How does she compare to Lin Wanzhou, the most beautiful woman in our capital?"
“No, no,” Hang Yuanting stroked his sparse beard, took a sip of tea slowly, and said, “At fourteen, she may not be as beautiful as Lady Lin, but the taste of her plump little hole is absolutely divine.”
Jin An snapped out of his daze and laughed, "Old brother, you're being naughty again! You went to Linzhang on business, but you ended up patronizing a fourteen-year-old girl from that place. It's a shame your wife comes to my house every few days to inquire about your situation."
"What man doesn't have an affair when he's out in the world?" Hang Yuanting put down his teacup, his gaze falling on Feng Tan, who was intently reading the documents. "I've heard that our new lord Feng from the Six Ministries is quite the expert. He's only been in the capital for two days and he's already slept with two girls from the Red Sleeve Pavilion, competed with Lord Xiao for the most beautiful courtesan, slapped Lord Gao, and even received twenty strokes of the cane from His Majesty! Lord Feng, is that true?"
Before Feng Tan could reply, the supervising secretary of the Ministry of Personnel burst into laughter, saying, "Brother Yuan Ting, you're really hitting a nerve! It's true that Lord Feng is a womanizer, and it's also true that he slapped his superior! And it's true that he got a beating!"
Upon hearing this, the officials in the hall burst into laughter. Amidst their mocking laughter, Feng Tan put down the book in his hand and said, "Gaozi said, 'Food and sex are human nature,' where 'sex' refers to female beauty; the Heart Sutra also says: 'When Avalokiteshvara Bodhisattva was practicing the profound Prajnaparamita, he perceived that the five aggregates are empty.' The five aggregates are: form, feeling, perception, mental formations, and consciousness. Here, 'form' refers to the various forms of worldly affairs."
Feng Tan paused, her gaze falling on Hang Yuanting, and spoke with sharp, incisive words, "It is true that I am fond of women, and all my actions stem from my lust for their beauty. We were husband and wife for one night, and although there was little affection, I was able to help them in their time of need. Lord Hang, you defiled a girl when she was only fourteen years old, and afterwards you discussed the girl's plumpness with a group of officials. It is clear that you only know about women and are ignorant of the world's complexities. Your five aggregates are not empty, and your evil deeds are still rampant. That is why you are nearly fifty years old and still hold the seventh rank."
After saying that, Hang Yuanting overturned the table and shouted angrily, "You bastard! I'll tear your mouth apart today!"
Hang Yuanting flew into a rage, but several officials who had been watching the scene saw the situation was getting out of hand and rushed forward to pull him back. "Lord Hang, please calm down. Lord Feng is just acting out of youthful impetuosity. Please don't take it to heart!"
Hang Yuanting's arms were grabbed, and he struggled violently, his anger blazing. "Screw you! Get off! All of you, get off me!"
Jin An was too fat to get too close to Hang Yuanting, so he pulled Feng Tan's arm and backed away. Just then, he bumped into the little eunuch who was delivering a message. The little eunuch was knocked down and cried out in pain, but quickly got up and continued to deliver the message.
"My goodness! The Six Ministries are fighting too! Lord Jin, please make them stop fighting! Go and stop the fighting in the Cabinet first, then come back and continue!"
Jin An spat and grabbed Feng Tan's arm, quickly pulling him outside. He said, "What are you saying, you little eunuch? What's the matter that caused the fight in the cabinet?"
Feng Tan was completely confused. According to the custom of Da Huang, on the first and fifteenth of each month, the six supervising secretaries would meet with the cabinet ministers in the inner cabinet. Today was neither the first nor the fifteenth, so why was Jin An dragging her to the inner cabinet?
The young eunuch sighed softly and urged, "The money negotiations have broken down again. The Grand Secretaries are currently arguing fiercely. You two, hurry up!"
Time was short, so Jin'an tried his best to explain the whole story: "Lord Feng is new to the Six Ministries and may not know that in addition to overseeing the Six Ministries and all departments, we officials also have a hidden task assigned by the Grand Secretary: to mediate disputes when he is not in the cabinet. The cabinet is a deep and complex place, and the cabinet ministers belong to Prince Jing and Prince Chu, and they often disagree on political matters. The Grand Secretaries are known for their 'gentlemen's actions rather than words,' which puts the eunuchs serving them in a difficult position!"
Feng Tan said knowingly, "The Six Departments Corridor and the Inner Cabinet Courtyard are close to each other, so if there's a fire there, we'll go put it out here?"
"Lord Feng is indeed wise, truly wise!" Jin An knew this was her first time 'putting out a fire,' so he reminded her, "Remember to act according to the situation! If the officials are just banging on the table and tearing up documents, then we don't need to pay attention to them for now! But if the elders start to fight, we must rush up and pull them apart!"
Feng Tan said, "Just like the colleagues who were there just now."
Jin An choked, then gave a forced laugh, “Oh dear, Lord Hang never speaks without thinking and has a terrible temper, so please don’t take it to heart.”
As they spoke, the group had already crossed the vermilion gate of the inner cabinet, and from afar they could hear several cabinet ministers arguing fiercely in the high halls and offices.
Minister of Revenue Yue Yuda's voice boomed, "Fine! Your Ministry of Rites needs money for the year-end sacrifices, the banquet for all officials, and the peace talks between your subordinate Court of State Ceremonies and the Hua Kingdom, and you say it's to get through the year-end! What kind of year-end? You're making me go through the gates of hell!"
Minister of Rites Gong Yibin's voice was equally loud, so loud it hurt people's eardrums. "Yue Yuda, you can't say that! The sacrificial ceremony and the banquet for officials are the established procedures of previous years. The Hua Kingdom delegation has arrived in the capital. How can we show our great power's magnanimity if we don't hold a banquet and hold peace talks? Which of these three items is not spent wisely! I just don't understand why your Ministry of Revenue is unwilling to allocate funds!"
Minister of War Mao Bingjun hurriedly said, "You can't say that! Your Ministry of Rites is short of money, but my Ministry of War is in an even tighter spot! The border army has won a great victory, but the soldiers haven't received their pay for this year yet! Are you going to let the soldiers' morale plummet if we can't pay them and end up with salaries for no one?!"
Feng Tan entered the cabinet office and saw that Yue Yuda, the Minister of Revenue, was so angry that his beard was bristling. He sighed three times: "Fine, fine, fine! It's only natural for your Ministry of Rites to ask for money, and it's perfectly reasonable for your Ministry of War to ask for money! You two might as well take a knife and kill me! I'm telling you right now, the Ministry of Revenue has enough silver to support an ancestor. You two can choose yourselves and have the Grand Secretary draft a proposal!"
Minister of Rites Gong Yibin said, "The affairs of the Ministry of Rites cannot be delayed, and His Majesty is keeping a close eye on them. Let's put this money in the Ministry of Rites' account."
Minister of War Mao Bingjun refused to admit defeat, his eyes wide with fury as he roared, "Gong Yibin! What do you mean? Your Ministry of Rites is in a big position, but my Ministry of War isn't? Our soldiers are fighting on the frontier, and we can't even pay them their wages after a great victory. Isn't that disheartening? Hmph, Minister Gong, you're wealthy, how could you possibly know the hardships of the border troops?"
"Mao Bingjun, who are you implying? Are you saying I embezzled money from the imperial court? That's slander!"
Mao Bingjun sarcastically remarked, "I didn't mention 'greed' at all, Lao Gong, if you take it personally, don't blame me! Your jumping around like that... there's something fishy going on!"
Gong Yibin stretched out his leg and kicked, "I'll kick you to death, you son of a bitch!"
Mao Bingjun, enraged by the kick, rolled up his sleeves and threw a punch, yelling, "Gong Yibin, I'll fuck your mother!"
Feng Tan glanced sideways at Jin An, who remained unmoved, and whispered, "Lord Jin, they've started fighting."
Jin An glanced at Feng Tan, shook his finger, and said calmly, "Lord Feng, please calm down. If we go up now, we might get caught in the crossfire. We can separate them when the two of you are locked in a stalemate."
Feng Tan said, "Lord Jin is truly well-versed in this matter."
Jin An said, "It's just based on experience."
Yue Yuda, the Minister of Revenue, sat back on his lacquered red chair, picked up a piece of white jade sesame cake, put it in his mouth, and chewed while watching the two men in the hall fight each other and go crazy.
Both men's official hats were knocked off during the fight. Mao Bingjun grabbed Gong Yibin's hair, and Gong Yibin grabbed Mao Bingjun's hair. The two pulled at each other, neither willing to let go, glaring angrily at each other while panting heavily.
Jin An said to Feng Tan, "Quick! Now!"
Although Jin An was fat, he was very strong. He walked between the two men, lifted Mao Bingjun up by the waist, and pulled him away, saying with a forced smile, "Lord Mao, please forgive me! We can talk things over!"
Even when Mao Bingjun was lifted up, he refused to let go of the hair he was holding. Feng Tan extended his index finger and lightly tapped the acupoints on the chests of the two men, causing them to immediately relax and release the hair they were holding.
After finishing the white jade sesame cake, Yue Yuda, the Minister of Revenue, looked at the chaotic crowd in the hall and drank a cup of lotus leaf tea to cleanse his palate. After drinking it, he smashed the thin-walled teacup with green bamboo patterns on the ground.
"Smack!"
With a sharp crack, the porcelain cup shattered on the floor. Yue Yuda patted the tea that had splashed on him, glanced at the two disheveled men who looked like madwomen, and said, "Have you had enough? You can't make a difference in front of me, so why don't you go and make a fool of yourselves in front of His Majesty?"
A note from the author:
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