Chapter 419: If you want to monitor, monitor each other
"You can't..." The strength in his hand tightened unconsciously, making her feel suffocated.
It's not a physical cage, but a psychological cage of despair: "...you can't leave me."
He was almost begging, with the most desperate curse: "I only have you, I only want you..."
Ji Linshen lowered his head and rested his forehead against hers. Hot tears fell on her cheeks without warning, burning her.
Her voice was choked with sobs and she said, "Lu Shiman...you can't abandon me, you can't!"
Lu Shiman was completely stunned by his sudden crazy behavior and surging despair.
The force on the neck and the tears so close to him were so hot that they burned him.
A huge heartache instantly overwhelmed all other emotions.
"You made a mistake... Ugh!" She tried to explain, but he held her wrist tightly, and the document bag containing the instruction manuals was knocked onto the carpet by his huge movement.
As she uttered the unclear syllables, Ji Linshen seemed to have exhausted all his strength, and the hand that was strangling her neck suddenly loosened.
The next second, in Lu Shiman's astonished eyes...
"Bang!"
There was a dull thud as my knees hit the soft carpet.
Ji Linshen knelt down in front of her straight and without any dignity.
It was like a believer whose faith had collapsed kneeling in front of the shrine.
His tall body hunched over, and his hands tightly grasped the edge of her sofa, his knuckles turning white from the force, and the protrusions of the joints were clearly visible.
He no longer looked at her, his head lowered almost to the carpet, and his shoulders began to tremble violently uncontrollably.
"I'm sorry..." The broken voice was filled with tears, and it sounded unusually clear and desperate in the dead silence of the room. "I was wrong... I was really wrong."
He admitted his mistake incoherently, his voice trembling, filled with heart-wrenching regret and the fear of losing everything: "You can hit me, scold me, but don't throw me away..."
"Please... Lu Shiman... please." Ji Linshen was like a drowning man grasping at the last straw, his voice low: "Don't leave me... I can't live without you."
This painful confession, so humble as to be in the dust, was like countless needles, densely piercing Lu Shiman's defenses.
Seeing him kneeling at her feet and admitting his mistake, Lu Shiman felt as if her heart was being cut by a knife.
The Ji Linshen in front of him looked exactly like himself when he knelt down and admitted his mistakes as a child.
She just felt difficulty breathing.
All my calmness and questioning were completely shattered the moment I saw him so collapsed and desperate.
She slid off the sofa almost immediately.
Without hesitation, she knelt in front of him.
The two knelt face to face on the soft carpet, their eyes finally meeting.
Lu Shiman stretched out her hands and gently held Ji Linshen's tear-stained and distraught face.
There was soothing warmth between her fingers, and with a slight pressure, she forced him to raise his eyes.
Her eyes were also red, and her voice was slightly choked by heartache, but very clear: "Look at me."
Their eyes met.
In addition to heartache, there was also determination in Lu Shiman's eyes.
Without saying another word, she decisively pulled back one hand and reached over to take the bag next to her.
The zipper sound was particularly harsh in the silence.
Ji Linshen's heart felt like it was being hit by a heavy hammer with every movement she made to open the bag.
He stared at her hand, the hand that had just gently held his face, now reaching towards the abyss that might contain the "verdict".
Was he going to take out the "freedom" that would end everything? He could almost imagine the touch of the cold paper...
What Lu Shiman took out of his bag was not the thin paper he had expected.
It was a small square box with a frosted texture.
She opened the box neatly and carefully took out a ring-shaped object from it.
A smart bracelet with matte black and smooth and simple lines.
Lu Shiman held the bracelet and handed it directly to Ji Linshen.
"Don't you want to be monitored?" She said, emphasizing each word: "Then I'll let you monitor me."
Ji Linshen's pupils suddenly shrank, and his breathing seemed to stop completely.
What does this mean?
The cold black object swayed in his sight, completely beyond the scope of his confused mind's prediction at the moment.
Lu Shiman's fingers closed around his cold, sweaty palm, forcing him to hold the bracelet tightly.
The cold texture of the metal penetrated the skin of his palm and hit his heart directly, making him shiver uncontrollably.
"Ji Linshen, look carefully." She held his face again with her other hand: "I'm not throwing you away, I'm giving myself to you more thoroughly."
His hand holding the cold bracelet began to tremble violently, and his heart seemed to be beating out of his throat.
Lu Shiman looked at his incredulous expression and reached into the small box with his other hand.
She took out another black smart bracelet of the same color.
The two bracelets lay quietly in her palms, like two tokens waiting to be exchanged.
"But..." Her eyes fell straight into his: "Ji Linshen, you can't be partial to one person and not to the other."
"You want to control me? Sure."
Her voice suddenly rose a few notes, with a strong possessiveness: "But I also want to control you."
These words exploded like thunder.
Ji Linshen was completely stunned, even forgetting to breathe, and could only look at her blankly.
Lu Shiman's eyes were hot and stubborn: "I am wearing the positioning you gave me, and you have to wear mine too."
"If you want to stare, stare at each other."
"If you want to monitor, monitor each other."
"If you want to lock it, lock it together."
"Even if it's rotten, we'll rot together."
Ji Linshen's world completely froze.
All the despair, fear and regret were like ice and snow in the sun in the face of her soul-piercing declaration.
Melt away instantly.
All that was left was overwhelming shock.
Like the first ray of light in the universe, it instantly illuminated all his desolation.
She...she actually responded in this way?
Not escape, not accusation, but a crazier and more thorough binding.
In a more extreme way than his own, he turned his morbid needs into a two-way chain.
She was willing to fall into the abyss with him.
A surge of ecstasy surged in his heart, and a complete sense of belonging that he had never felt before.
Ji Linshen was trembling all over, looking at the pair of bracelets in Lu Shiman's hands, as if they were the key to open another dimension.
Next second.
"Manman!" A cry filled with endless fear of loss and recovery came out of her mouth.
Ji Linshen opened his arms and fiercely embraced Lu Shiman, who was kneeling in front of him.
His arms tightened to the extreme, as if he wanted to embed her into his chest.
His hot cheek pressed tightly against the warm skin of her neck, and tears flowed out again.
"My Manman...Manman..." He whispered her name over and over in her ear like a child.
His voice was hoarse and choked with fear and inexpressible relief: "You scared me to death... You almost scared me to death..."
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