Chapter 37
37
Marrying Zhao Xingcan once became Lin Ju's inner demon.
During this year, she had many dreams. In her dreams, she picked up newspapers from a newsstand, saw the news of Zhao Xingcan's marriage from the pop-up messages on her mobile phone, from the word-of-mouth discussions, and from Wang Yue's tentative inquiries.
Over and over again, the maggots in her tarsal bones were wearing her down.
Now, I heard with my own ears that Zhao Xingcan was talking about getting married.
Lin Ju reached out to grab Zhao Xingcan's hand and looked at him with wide eyes.
Zhao Xingcan was easily pulled away by her, and her slender fingers were tightly grasped by her two hands. Lin Ju's nails dug into the back of his hand, causing some pain.
But he did not pull his hand away. He knelt on his left knee and looked up. The base of his ear was slightly red.
The room was very quiet, with only the breathing between them being more rapid and heavy than usual.
Lin Ju's expression was dull, she seemed a little dumbfounded, and she thought blankly for a moment.
Zhao Xingcan observed silently, and seeing that her expression gradually became clear, he sighed inwardly, thinking that his confession probably had no chance.
Sure enough, he heard Lin Ju hum in a rather cold tone, "You're playing tricks on me. I haven't even agreed to be with you again, how can you jump to marriage?"
"Then you have to agree to be with me first." Zhao Xingcan was indeed cheating.
Lin Ju was so angry at his words that she laughed, "How is that possible?"
"How is it impossible?"
Zhao Xingcan stood up, leaned forward, and his knees, which had just been kneeling on the ground, fell to the edge of the bed.
A large shadow fell, and his hands pressed on both sides of Lin Ju's body, almost covering Lin Ju completely.
They looked at each other, and Lin Ju saw herself in his eyes.
"That's not what you said last night?" Zhao Xingcan said with a smile.
Lin Ju was completely blacked out and had no recollection of what happened last night. Her heart skipped a beat and she asked, "What did I say?"
Zhao Xingcan remained calm as he made up a story, "You said you still loved me. I asked you if you wanted to get back together, and you said yes. I asked you if you wanted to get married, and you said yes."
Lin Ju was silent, and Zhao Xingcan said again: "How come everything changes after a good night's sleep?"
Lin Ju glared at him, "Impossible."
Zhao Xingcan said nothing, just smiled.
Lin Ju was the first to be defeated. She couldn't beat the old bastard Zhao Xingcan, and she loved Zhao Xingcan.
She didn't look at him, and she gradually felt aggrieved, and her eyes turned red.
When Zhao Xingcan saw it, he was stunned, then he sighed, relaxed his shoulders, and first withdrew the strength from his back spine and stepped back.
Lin Ju thought he was annoyed, so she suddenly grabbed him and asked, her voice louder than before, "Are you leaving?"
Zhao Xingcan tilted his head and said, "It doesn't matter if you don't agree to my proposal. I will continue to propose to you."
Lin Ju stared at him blankly, speechless.
Zhao Xingcan stood up and picked up the thermal box on the cabinet. "Change your clothes and come to the living room to have some porridge."
After saying that, he turned and walked out.
Lin Ju sat up slowly and looked at his back.
Lin Ju changed her clothes, washed up, and came out of the room.
In the living room of the suite, Zhao Xingcan was sitting on the sofa. The tableware was already set on the coffee table, and the seafood porridge was emitting a fresh aroma.
Lin Ju walked over, Zhao Xingcan raised his eyes, picked up his phone and said, "Do as I say first." He put down the phone, picked up the small white bowl and served her porridge.
Lin Ju sat on the single sofa beside him and took the small bowl he handed over. A few strands of long hair fell on her arms, covering half of her face.
She raised her hand, lifted her hair, and tucked it behind her ear with her fingers.
After a hangover, her sense of taste was a little dull, and it took her several bites before she could slowly taste the flavor.
The balcony window was open, it was raining outside, and the only sound inside was the rain.
After drinking half a bowl, her dizzy and sluggish head seemed to clear up and her eyelashes lifted up.
Zhao Xingcan leaned back on the sofa with his legs stretched out, holding his cell phone and replying to messages.
Lin Ju pursed her lips. Zhao Xingcan tilted his head, paused his fingers, and asked, "What's wrong?"
He should be working, as there was no expression on his face. He was completely different from when he was kneeling on one knee in front of Lin Ju just now.
Lin Ju asked: "Are you busy? Aren't you going to work?"
“Not very busy.”
Lin Ju said "Oh", drank a few more mouthfuls of porridge, and then stammered: "But I'm very busy, I have to go to work."
Zhao Xingcan admired her work attitude very much, "You are not fully recovered yet."
"I've rested long enough." Lin Ju put down the bowl of porridge. "I won't feel at ease until I finish the work."
Since she said this, Zhao Xingcan did not refute her anymore. He just said, "Drink the rest of the porridge, and I will let you go."
He relaxed, Lin Ju curled the corners of her mouth, picked up the small bowl, drank the remaining porridge in a few mouthfuls, and handed the empty bowl to him.
Lin Ju came out of Zhao Xingcan's room, turned a corner, and saw her unfinished mural.
She started working, and Zhao Xingcan stood behind her for a while with his arms folded.
Lin Ju was a little absent-minded and turned her head three times. The fourth time she wanted to ask him if he could not stand behind her, but when she turned her head, Zhao Xingcan had already left.
He left without a word.
Lin Ju lowered her eyes silently, but only for a few seconds, then she began to immerse herself in the mural.
She worked until the evening. During this time, Hu Xiao came twice, once to ask her to have lunch and once to ask her to have dinner.
Lin Ju agreed, but didn't go.
She spent a day completing the rest and then went to find Wu Wangfeng.
Wu Wangfeng had just finished his meal and came out of the restaurant when he received her message and was waiting for her in the lobby.
Lin Ju hadn't changed her clothes. Her black sweatshirt was stained with paint, her hair was tied up high, and her face was pale. She walked up to Wu Wangfeng and called him "Senior Brother" in a low voice, sounding a bit listless.
Wu Wangfeng asked her if she hadn't eaten yet since he hadn't seen her come to the restaurant just now.
Lin Ju glanced at the restaurant and nodded.
"Then go eat something now, the restaurant is still open."
Lin Ju agreed and then said, "Brother, I have completed my part of this project. Can I return home early?"
Wu Wangfeng was stunned and followed her into the restaurant.
Dinner is usually served buffet style. Lin Ju took a white plate and picked up some food at random.
Wu Wangfeng followed her all the way and asked her why she wanted to return home early.
She was silent at first, and after she sat down on the dining chair, she said, "My father passed away, and I have to go back to attend his funeral."
She received the message from Xu Gaoyou at noon.
Just a few words: Sister, Dad is gone.
She stared at it for a long time, her fingers touching the phone, squinting her eyes, holding her breath, squatting down, sitting on the ground, as if she couldn't understand it.
She remembered that the last time she saw her father, he was in good spirits, sitting in a chair, smiling at her happily.
He no longer had the aggressiveness he had when he was with her mother. It was as if he had shed his skin and become a different person, gently and weakly caring about her father.
But now, this good father is suddenly gone.
She took a deep breath and hit Xu Gaoyou with her backhand.
I called several times, but Xu Gaoyou didn't answer. When I called again, I heard that the other party's phone was turned off.
Her heart was pounding, and she felt a pain and stuffiness. She climbed down from the shelf, held onto the wall, clicked on the flight information, and stared at the plane ticket for a long time.
After buying a plane ticket for tomorrow, she immersed herself in the mural.
The moment she finished, she sat cross-legged on the shelf and looked up at the finished wall.
His body and face were covered in paint, his eyelashes were trembling, he exhaled foul air, sat for a few minutes, and then stood up by supporting himself on his knees.
When Wu Wangfeng heard what she said, he immediately agreed.
When I asked her what time her flight was, she said tomorrow morning.
"Send me the ticket invoice and I can reimburse you."
Lin Ju nodded, his mind and soul were not here.
She took a few bites of food, and Wu Wangfeng kept sighing. Lin Ju listened for ten minutes and had no appetite to begin with, so she couldn't eat any more.
She stood up and took the plate to return it.
Wu Wangfeng followed her and asked as they walked, "How about I go back with you? I'm worried about you being alone."
Lin Ju stopped, turned around, and looked puzzled and surprised.
Wu Wangfeng seemed to be hesitant to speak, his lips moving slightly.
Lin Ju's drooping eyelashes quietly opened, and she tilted her head slightly to look behind Wu Wangfeng.
Wu Wangfeng followed her gaze and turned back.
A few steps away, Zhao Xingcan had his suit piled on his arm, his shirt collar undone, and his tie just tucked into his pocket. He also tilted his head, his movements mirroring Lin Ju's, and walked towards them, skirting a few chairs to stand beside Lin Ju.
Wu Wangfeng heard him say, "No need. I've already bought the plane ticket and will be returning home with Lin Ju."
…
After a flight of more than ten hours, Lin Ju took off her hearing aid as soon as she got on the plane.
When Zhao Xingcan changed to first class, she turned sideways and curled up in her seat, with her long hair loosely tied up, revealing a small patch of white skin on the back of her neck.
She was a little dazed all the way. Zhao Xingcan held her shoulder and handled various procedures. After boarding the plane, he let her take a nap. When she woke up, the plane had landed.
Lin Ju listened to him very much at this time. She curled up her limbs and put herself in a small corner.
She closed her eyes. Everything around her was so quiet, but she felt like she was in a storm.
She recalled the image of her father holding her in the hospital as a child. They had been transferred to numerous hospitals, hoping to cure her hearing. She was young and naive, only aware of the unpleasant smell of hospital disinfectant, the pain of the needle during blood draws, and the quiet nights after hospitalization.
She kept crying, so her father held her and walked from one wall to the other.
In the summer, the shadows of the trees swayed, falling on the gray-white floor tiles and on my father's face as he forced a smile.
However, in the blink of an eye, she was left alone.
In the silent world, her parents are getting farther and farther away from her.
She stood there, wanting to shout, but no sound came out.
They looked at her from a distance and said something to her, but she couldn't hear it.
When the plane landed, Lin Ju woke up from a nightmare with tears on her face.
She was covered with a small blanket that had been there at some point. She covered her face with her hands and secretly wiped away the tears on her face.
She supported herself on the armrest and slowly sat up.
Her tied hair came loose, and the slightly curly ends fell on her arms. She tilted her head with red eyes.
Zhao Xingcan walked to her side without her knowing when. All the passengers in the cabin had left. In the empty aisle, with the cabin door open, he was standing against the light, and the light gathered behind him like wings.
He raised his hand and wiped away the remaining tears from the corners of Lin Ju's eyes.
He didn't wear a hearing aid, but Lin Ju looked at his slightly moving lips and said, "Don't be afraid, I'm with you."
She shuddered and remembered.
The flight lasted more than ten hours. The continuous dampness was like a nightmare of winter rain. At the end of the dream, Zhao Xingcan became her summer.
She held Zhao Xingcan's fingers, looked up, remained silent, and her stagnant breathing began again.
She loosened her hands and slowly signed.
She pointed to her chest and tapped her solar plexus with her finger, then pointed at Zhao Xingcan and then at herself, crossed her hands in front of her chest, and spread them outwards.
Each movement was connected, yet incredibly slowly. Her white fingertips were trembling, her slender body was trembling, her red eyes were trembling, and her whole world was shaking.
Zhao Xingcan lowered his eyes and grabbed her hand.
She said, I want to marry you.
He replied, go now.
End of the article
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