Chapter 22 He's Back
Human joys and sorrows are not shared, and neither are diseases.
After running back from the hotel in the rain that night, a fierce cold struck. First, my throat was itchy, then I had a low-grade fever, and finally, it developed into a persistent cough.
He had no choice but to take sick leave and lock himself in his apartment, like a wounded animal retreating to its burrow.
Physical discomfort is tolerable, but what's truly unbearable is sudden insomnia.
As soon as I close my eyes, those fragmented memories play out automatically:
The silhouette of Shen Beidao cooking porridge in the kitchen, the dark stains on Shen Beidao's shoulders from holding an umbrella in the rain, the long shadow of Shen Beidao cast by the streetlights while waiting for him...
Although we've only known each other for two months, these images are so vivid, as if they're etched into my mind, burning repeatedly, refusing to fade.
"I'm such a loser," Lin Yi muttered to himself, wrapped in a blanket and nestled on the sofa, looking at the empty living room.
The doorbell rang at that moment, followed by the sound of a password being entered. [Beep~ Door unlocked]
Zhang Zexuan and Li Rui squeezed in, carrying large and small bags.
Lin Yi was trying to get up from the sofa. He was wearing wrinkled pajamas, his hair was a mess like a bird's nest, and his face was flushed with a sickly pallor.
"My God! Lin Yi, are you trying to cultivate immortality?" Zhang Zexuan put the shopping bag on the ground and reached out to touch Lin Yi's forehead. "So hot? Did you take any medicine?"
"I ate..." Lin Yi answered in a hoarse voice, stepping back slightly. "Why are you all here?"
"You must have a bad memory. We're colleagues at the same company now. How could I not know you were on leave? Besides, you weren't answering your phone. I was worried something might have happened to you, so I came directly to your door."
As Zhang Zexuan spoke, he walked towards the kitchen on his own. "It just so happens that it's Saturday today. Li Rui and I went downstairs to buy some groceries to cook you a meal."
Li Rui, on the other hand, was much quieter.
He put the fruit he brought into the refrigerator, poured Lin Yi a glass of warm water, and then sat down on the sofa, carefully examining Lin Yi: "Why are your eyes swollen too? Could it be the flu? It seems like a lot of people in Jiangzhou have gotten the flu recently."
Lin Yi forced a smile. "It's nothing, just a common cold."
The sound of Zhang Zexuan washing vegetables came from the kitchen, the splashing water filling the silence of the living room.
Li Rui: "You haven't gotten better all week, your mental state is so poor, and your lips are extremely dry. I don't think it's a common cold. Why don't you go to the hospital for a check-up tomorrow?"
Lin Yi was wrapped in a blanket, curled up on the sofa, wearing a mask to prevent infecting Li Rui. "It's not a cold, I'm heartbroken."
The sound was so soft it was almost inaudible.
But Zhang Zexuan's hearing was exceptionally sharp at times like these.
He stormed out of the kitchen, spatula in hand, eyes wide: "What? When did you start dating? How come we didn't know?"
"I wanted to wait until things stabilized before telling you," Lin Yi said, his voice lowered and his eyes darting away. "But... it ended in less than two months."
"Three months? Do you think you're pregnant? Can't you say you're afraid of miscarriage in the first three months?" Zhang Zexuan's mouth always beats his brain.
Li Rui glared at him, got up and pushed him toward the kitchen: "Go wash the vegetables, don't make a mess here."
Only after Zhang Zexuan reluctantly returned to the kitchen did Li Rui sit down again.
He handed Lin Yi a tissue, speaking very softly: "Is the other person that online friend you mentioned before, or someone else?"
Lin Yi shook his head and gave a wry smile: "You might not believe it, but it's from your own school."
The sound of a spatula falling to the floor came from the kitchen.
Zhang Zexuan poked his head out again: "Jiangzhou University? Who is he? Which college? Did he bully you? Do you want me to beat him up for you!"
"Never mind." Lin Yi buried his face in the blanket, rubbing his temples. "It's all in the past."
Zhang Zexuan put down what he was holding and began to pass "intelligence" to the person on his phone.
Li Rui remained silent for a while, and seeing Lin Yi's expression, he didn't dare to ask any more questions. He also took out his phone and started typing.
Lin Yi glanced at the screen and casually asked, "About school?"
"Yeah, my internship is almost here, and there's all sorts of stuff going on at the college. My advisor asked me to compile information for the whole class and send it to him tonight."
Lin Yi's heart suddenly raced. He forced himself to ask in the calmest tone, "Your mentor? The one you took photos with on stage last time?"
“Yes.” Li Rui spoke the name with natural respect. “How is he? Isn’t he handsome? Many girls in our school like him. Other teachers have empty seats during their open classes, but when Teacher Shen teaches, the door is always packed with people.”
"Lots of girls like him? Didn't you say he was dating that female teacher?"
"It seems not."
Li Rui pulled out his phone, opened a video, and handed it to Lin Yi. "Look at this marketing account. They posted a video of Professor Shen giving a speech a few days ago, and it's almost got a million likes. The author specifically noted in the comments: 'I asked Professor Shen, and he's currently single.'"
"I think they're not together. Besides, I go to events with my mentor every day, and it seems like Professor Fang Yu is only there occasionally. But I'm just his student, and I wouldn't dare ask him about such gossip. Professor Shen is quite serious in private."
Lin Yi took the phone.
The screen displays a clip of Shen Beidao's speech at the school's anniversary celebration.
He stood under the spotlight, and the lines of his profile were exceptionally clear in the lens.
The video was accompanied by a piece of soothing pop music, which made his voice sound even deeper and more pleasant.
The footage was clearly carefully edited, with several close-up shots capturing his fingers pushing up his glasses, the slight movement of his Adam's apple during his speech, and his calm eyes when he occasionally looked at the camera...
The comments section was already buzzing, and the number of likes was still rising at a visible rate:
[Top Comment] What an amazing teacher! I need all his information within three minutes! [heart][heart]
[Reply] Professor Shen from the German Department of the School of Foreign Languages at Jiangzhou University, unmarried, 30 years old, PhD, estimated height 188cm+. You're welcome, just call me a Good Samaritan [adjusting glasses]
[Reply] Sister, may you have a peaceful and prosperous life! So, is it still too late to apply to Jiangzhou University? [Kneeling in admiration]
[Reply] The sister above is so thoughtful! I'll go check the admission scores for Jiangzhou University right now!
[Number 2 Most Popular Comment] Was I the only one staring at his hands the whole time?? The length of those fingers, those knuckles... Sorry, I'm a dream girl!!!
[Reply] You're not alone! I watched him flip through the PPT ten times! Who understands that effortless sense of control!
[3rd Hot Comment] Just wondering, does Professor Shen accept students from outside the school? Like, adult education? I'm 28 this year, but I can learn German again!
[4th most popular comment] Am I the only one who noticed his ring finger is bare? Great, I still have a chance.
[Reply] Forget about the previous part. I heard he's talking to a professor from the Foreign Languages Department.
[Reply] Is this a rumor? Didn't the video creator specifically indicate "It has been confirmed that Teacher Shen is currently single"? It's in the description!
......
Lin Yi's finger hovered over the screen. He saw that the video was posted at 11:27 PM on the night of the school anniversary.
It was two hours after he ran away from the hotel.
A sudden surge of inexplicable anger welled up within me.
He hasn't even officially broken up with her yet, but Shen Beidao is already in a hurry to announce that he's single?
Who is this announcement for? Is it for Teacher Fang, or for all potential admirers?
Is he really that ashamed to be seen in public?
Lin Yi grew angrier the more he thought about it, his breathing became rapid, and he couldn't stop coughing.
Li Rui quickly poured him another glass of water: "You really need to go to the hospital to get checked out. This can't go on. You might develop pneumonia from coughing up so much."
Lin Yi: I was driven crazy by that scumbag! Is this some kind of karma?!
Not long after, Zhao Qing and Zhou Ziyang also arrived.
They came from a neighboring city, taking a high-speed train for more than two hours.
As soon as Zhao Qing entered the room, she gave Lin Yi a firm hug, completely unafraid of catching something: "You didn't even say you were sick! If Zhang Zexuan hadn't been shouting about it in the group chat, we wouldn't have known!"
Zhou Ziyang was quite practical and brought several boxes of cold medicine: "My sister is a doctor, so I asked her to prescribe some medicine for you. It's better than what you can buy at the pharmacy."
The four people surrounded Lin Yi, and the living room suddenly became lively.
They were eating a family-style hot pot when Zhang Zexuan started talking about his eccentric colleagues at his internship company. Laughter filled the room, dispelling the sickly atmosphere.
Lin Yi sat in the middle, listening to his friends' voices, and suddenly felt a lump in his throat.
When you're heartbroken or sick, at least you have friends by your side.
It doesn't seem bad.
In the evening, Zhou Ziyang had to leave first.
Zhang Zexuan has to go to work tomorrow, and Li Rui has to go back to school to submit materials tonight. They gave each other a lot of instructions before leaving.
Zhao Qing stayed until the very end.
After the door closed and the living room quieted down again, she sat down next to Lin Yi and looked at him seriously: "Lin Yi, just forget about what happened last time. I have a new boyfriend now, and he's much more handsome than you."
Lin Yi hadn't smiled much all day, but Zhao Qing's sudden words made him burst out laughing: "Thank you for acknowledging my looks, Sister Qing. I also wish you and your handsome boyfriend a long and happy marriage."
"Shut up, I'm a staunch non-marriage advocate. Once the novelty wears off, I'll dump him and find someone else."
Zhao Qing looked him up and down. With a woman's intuition, she knew Lin Yi had something on his mind. After considering for a moment, she asked, "You're not still hung up on your ex-boyfriend, are you?"
"Huh?" Lin Yi was taken aback.
"Chen Zhinan".
"Oh, I had almost forgotten. The fact that we've been friends for so many years proves that I'm not a sentimental person."
"Do you think I believe that?" Zhao Qing pouted. "He came back from studying in Japan last week and said he'll be developing his career in Jiangzhou from now on. He plans to open a studio."
"Good."
"The main thing is, he asked me about you. Back then, you two got together because of me... It's only been more than three years since we last saw each other. Have you really forgotten him?"
Forgot?
How could I forget?
It's been more than three years since we last met, but it's only been a little over three years.
Three years ago, in the same autumn, the air was filled with a similar coolness and the scent of sunshine.
That was the most beautiful season in Jiangzhou. The whole city seemed to be painted with paint, and the trees on both sides of the street were ablaze with color. The bright orange-red, brilliant golden yellow and the stubborn green intertwined, just like their bright and competitive lives.
The air was filled with the sweet, dried scent of plants, mixed with the caramel aroma wafting from the roadside roasted chestnut stalls...
Lin Yi, wearing his high school uniform, walked side by side with Chen Zhinan on their way home from school.
They had just finished two consecutive months of intensive training for the provincial art exam and were finally able to enjoy a rare "week of going home".
They passed by a milk tea shop on the street, ordered, queued up, and waited for two cups of hot milk tea.
【Customer number 444, please pick up your meal】
【Please pick up your meal, number 445】
Lin Yi walked ahead, holding a milk tea in his hand. "Finally, it's time to go home! Why do we have to study for two months straight to prepare for the provincial civil service exam? I don't even have a change of clothes!"
"You don't know, I bought a pack of cigarettes for the gatekeeper and asked him to let me go home to change my clothes at noon, but he refused and told me to take it. He just wouldn't let me leave the school gate."
But my home is less than a kilometer from this shabby art training studio! It takes at most twenty minutes round trip, but the old man won't let me leave the house. It's unbelievable!
Chen Zhinan walked beside him, carrying both of their schoolbags. He was about the same height as Lin Yi, and his profile looked particularly gentle in the setting sun: "What about cigarettes?"
"The supermarket owner wouldn't let me return the item, which was in my backpack."
"You didn't cause a scene at the supermarket?"
"I was just about to greet his relatives when I turned around and saw the homeroom teacher... I don't want to be called over for a talk."
“Your homeroom teacher likes you the most,” Chen Zhinan said with a smile. “Because you study so well, he might… give you a big hard time.”
"What are you saying!" Lin Yi took a few steps back, hooked his arm around Chen Zhinan's shoulder, and tightened his grip on Chen's neck as if punishing him. "Whose side are you on? Say it!"
Amidst their laughter and banter, their eyes met.
The light of the setting sun shone directly into Chen Zhinan's eyes, those usually gentle eyes now filled with emotions that Lin Yi couldn't understand.
Passionate yet restrained, gentle yet burning hot.
Lin Yi's heart suddenly raced. He let go of her hand and pretended to be nonchalant as he continued walking forward: "Tonight, come to my house to do your homework?"
"Okay, sure." Chen Zhinan's voice sounded from behind, a little lower than usual.
They were the top students in the class and the art teacher's two most prized students.
The teacher often put their paintings side by side for comparison, but always said that he couldn't tell which was better.
They are equally excellent, just with slightly different art styles.
Lin Yi's paintings are flamboyant and passionate, with bold colors, while Chen Zhinan's paintings are delicate and serene, paying attention to details.
The dim lighting at night makes it easiest for teenagers to become infatuated.
They sat in Lin Yi's room, A3 drawing papers spread on the floor, and no one picked them up and put them on the drawing pad.
Lin Yi suddenly pulled out the pack of cigarettes he hadn't given away from his bag.
"What are you doing?" Chen Zhinan frowned.
"Give it a try." Lin Yi pulled out a cigarette and clumsily lit it.
He took a sip and was immediately choked, coughing violently until tears welled up in his eyes.
Chen Zhinan quickly handed him water: "Don't try it, it's not good stuff."
Lin Yi stubbornly shook his head. He stared at the flickering fire between his fingers, then suddenly looked up at Chen Zhinan: "Before becoming an adult, you have to start learning what adults do."
He took another puff.
This time he seemed to have learned it; the smoke was slowly exhaled, filling the narrow room with a hazy mist.
Chen Zhinan looked at him.
The soft light shone on Lin Yi's profile, illuminating his slightly trembling eyelashes and his eyes, which were squinting from the smoke.
At that moment, Lin Yi shed his usual arrogance and revealed a strange sexiness that lay between a boy and a man.
Chen Zhinan leaned over and gently kissed Lin Yi on the cheek.
A very light kiss, like a gentle breeze.
Both of them froze.
Time seemed to stand still at that moment.
Smoke, the ticking clock on the wall, the occasional car passing by outside the window... all sounds and images are blurred, leaving only the sound of each other breathing so close together.
Then Lin Yi stubbed out his cigarette, turned around, cupped Chen Zhinan's face, and kissed him.
It was a kiss, tinged with the smell of smoke, both awkward and passionate. Teeth clashed, breaths mingled, neither knew technique, driven purely by instinct...
They collapsed onto the bed, their school uniform jackets tossed haphazardly on the floor...
At that very moment, the door was pushed open.
Lin Yi's mother stood at the door, holding a fruit platter.
The smile on her face froze when she saw the view in the room, and then shattered.
The fruit platter fell to the ground, and the fruit rolled all over the floor.
What followed was like a chaotic nightmare.
The mother's cries, her hysterical curses, her accusations against Lin Yi's father, and her despair for the family...
All the emotions rushed in like a tsunami, almost drowning Lin Yi.
But he was surprisingly calm.
When his mother was exhausted from crying and collapsed on the ground, Lin Yi went over, knelt in front of her, and took her hand.
"Mom," his voice was soft but clear, "you should get a divorce."
His mother looked up at him with her red and swollen eyes.
"Don't wrong yourself for my sake, don't wrong yourself for anyone else." Lin Yi continued, trying to appear manly, but his voice trembled uncontrollably. "I've known about you and my dad for a long time."
Yes, he knew all along.
He knew his father was having an affair, he knew his mother was maintaining the facade of a complete family for his sake, and he knew that the family had long been rotting from the inside out.
If someone has to take the blame for all the mistakes, then let him take the blame.
If his mother's only hope is him, then let that hope be shattered.
At least this way, the mother can leave without any worries and can pursue her own happiness.
Tears welled up in the mother's eyes again.
But this time, something seemed different in her eyes.
It was also in this hospital that he sat on the metal chair outside the examination room...
Listening to his mother ask the doctor, "My child is sick, he has a mental illness. He's a boy, and he kissed another boy. Doctor... how should this be treated? He's so young..."
"Patient number 60, please proceed to consultation room number one."
"Patient number 60, please proceed to consultation room number one."
The hospital's announcement pulled Lin Yi back to reality from his memories.
Lin Yi sat on a chair in the waiting area, holding his registration slip in his hand, only to realize that his number had finally been called.
In the examination room, after a thorough examination, the doctor said, "It's an upper respiratory tract infection, not the flu. I'll prescribe some medicine for you. Take it regularly for a week, and you won't need a follow-up check-up once you're better."
While typing on the computer, the doctor asked, "Have you been taking any medications in the last two days?"
Lin Yi: "No."
Doctor: "You haven't taken any medicine?"
Lin Yi hesitated for a moment: "I drank a packet of Banlangen granules before I got sick, does that count?"
That was brewed for him by Shen Beidao. It was raining that night, and Shen Beidao was worried that he would catch a cold, so he specially brewed some white gentian root and handed it to him.
He remembered the temperature of Shen Beidao's fingers when they touched the cup, and the gentle tone in Shen Beidao's voice when he said "preventing colds".
The doctor glanced at him and said, "Take care of yourself these next few days. You don't look too well. Young people need to take care of their health too. Eat and sleep well; your health is your own responsibility."
Lin Yi paused for a moment, then nodded with a wry smile, "I understand."
He took the doctor's prescription to pay the bill.
There were quite a few people in line. He stood in the queue, looking out at the gray sky, and suddenly wondered why life was so tiring.
He waited in line for several minutes before it was his turn.
He took out his phone and scanned the QR code on the operating machine.
The machine hummed as the payment slip slowly emerged from the bottom.
Just then, a hand with distinct knuckles reached out and gently pulled the form away.
Lin Yi looked up.
Shen Beidao stood in front of him, wearing a dark gray overcoat, his gaze behind his gold-rimmed glasses calm and composed.
He held Lin Yi's payment slip in his hand, looked at the diagnosis on it, and frowned slightly.
"Upper respiratory tract infection." Shen Beidao's voice was low. "Why did it take so long to come for a checkup?"
Lin Yi stood frozen in place, unable to utter a single word.
The noisy sounds of the hospital, the smell of disinfectant, the gloomy sky outside the window... all sensory inputs became blurred at this moment.
In his world, there was only Shen Beidao's face, Shen Beidao's voice, and the familiar, indifferent yet gentle aura emanating from Shen Beidao.
He wanted to say, "What's it to you?"
I wanted to say, "It's none of your business."
I wanted to say, "Give me back the order form."
But it felt like something was blocking my throat, and I couldn't make a sound.
Shen Beidao looked at his pale face, the dark circles under his eyes, and his slightly trembling lips, his gaze deepening.
“Lin Yi,” he called his name, his voice filled with a weariness Lin Yi had never heard before, “Let’s talk.”
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