Chapter 186: Angry and Heartbroken
When Lin Yan arrived at Yunshen Pavilion, Lan Xichen was anxiously pacing the living room. Hearing the door open, he hurried over to greet him, "Lin Yan, you're here! Sizhui is chasing him..."
Before he could finish his words, Si Zhui's mumbling could be heard from the second floor. His voice was nasal and sounded particularly weak.
Lin Yan's heart tightened, and he rushed upstairs in two steps. In the bedroom, Si Zhui lay on the bed, his cheeks flushed, his lips pale, his forehead covered in cold sweat, his brows furrowed, and he kept muttering, "Don't go... Brother Lin, don't go..."
"When did the fever start?" Lin Yan reached out to his forehead, the scorching temperature made his fingertips numb.
"I just found out. I took his temperature, and it's almost 39 degrees." Lan Xichen followed in with fever-reducing medicine, his face serious. "I gave him medicine, but it didn't go down at all."
Lin Yan said nothing more and carefully picked up Si Zhui. The person in his arms was as light as a feather. He felt limp from the fever and subconsciously shrank into his arms, as if he had found his only source of warmth.
"Let's go to the hospital." Lin Yan's voice was heavy. He carried Si Zhui and walked out, his steps so fast that they made the wind move.
The lights in the hospital's emergency room were brightly lit. Si Zhui was placed on the bed. As the nurse gave him an injection, he groaned twice in a daze, but he didn't wake up. He just clutched the corner of Lin Yan's clothes tightly.
Lin Yan sat by the bed, watching the drops of liquid drip from the IV tube, feeling a lump in his stomach. He canceled his flight and emailed the New York branch, temporarily handing over his work. But his fingertips remained cold—this fever had come too suddenly, too strangely.
In the early morning, Sizhui's temperature finally dropped a little, and he became more awake. Seeing Lin Yan guarding his bedside, he smiled weakly, his voice hoarse like sandpaper: "Brother Lin...you didn't leave?"
"I didn't leave." Lin Yan touched his cheek, his tone filled with suppressed anger, "How do you feel?"
"Much better." Si Zhui leaned closer to him, his eyes sparkling with a hint of subtle joy. "Did you...stay because of me?"
Lin Yan's heart suddenly sank. Seeing him like this, his previous guess was instantly answered. He didn't answer, but just tucked the corner of the quilt for him, and his voice became a little colder: "Go to sleep, we'll talk in the morning."
Si Zhui didn't notice the change in his tone, thinking he was worried about her. She closed her eyes obediently and soon fell into a deep sleep again. But the hand that was clutching the corner of his clothes never let go.
The next morning, Sizhui's homeroom teacher called with a worried tone, "Mr. Lin, Lan Sizhui didn't come to school today. Is he feeling unwell? He's been distracted in class these past few days, and after class he's always whispering with Lan Jingyi and Jin Ling. I asked him what's wrong, but he wouldn't say..."
After hanging up the phone, Lin Yan stood in front of the window of the ward, his face so gloomy that water seemed to drip out.
The head teacher's words, Si Zhui's question tinged with smug joy, and the sudden high fever... all the clues strung together pointed to an answer that made him angry and painful.
This kid did it on purpose.
In order to get him to stay, she was so stupid as to torture herself by taking a cold shower.
Lin Yan closed his eyes, remembering his original reason for going to school—it was simply because Si Zhui had just transferred in and was shy, and he wanted to spend more time with him, so he went with him to high school. He had already earned a university degree through self-study, and every day he stayed at school was simply to keep an eye on this child who always worried him.
But he hadn't expected that the child would hurt himself to keep him.
"Are you so afraid that I will leave?" Lin Yan walked back to the bed and looked at Si Zhui who had just woken up, his voice trembling with uncontrollable fear.
Si Zhui was stunned by his question. Seeing the anger in his eyes, he panicked instantly. He quickly lowered his head and whispered, "I... I didn't mean it..."
"You didn't mean to?" Lin Yan's voice suddenly rose. "Then tell me, why did you suddenly have a high fever? Did you listen to Jin Ling and Lan Jingyi's bad advice and take a cold shower?"
Si Zhui's shoulders trembled violently, tears welling up in his eyes, but he stubbornly refused to admit it: "I didn't... I just caught a cold by accident..."
"Are you not careful?" Lin Yan looked at his red eyes, her heart aching with anger, as if being cut by a knife. "In order to make me stay, you even ignored your own body? Lan Sizhui, tell me, in your heart, am I the kind of person who would abandon you?"
The last sentence hit Sizhui's heart like a hammer. He couldn't hold it back any longer and burst into tears, tears falling like beads from a broken string: "I'm not... I'm just afraid... I'm afraid that you'll leave and never come back... I'm afraid that you'll ignore me like last time..."
He cried breathlessly, crying out the fear and insecurity in his heart: "I know this is wrong... but I can't control it... When I think about you going to such a far place and being gone for several days, I get scared..."
Lin Yan watched him trembling with tears, and his anger was instantly replaced by heartache. He squatted down, reached out and pulled Si Zhui into his arms, his movements so gentle as if he was afraid to break a treasure.
"Silly girl." His voice was low and hoarse, filled with helplessness and heartache. "I said I would come back, and I will definitely come back. How could you...how could you torture yourself like this?"
The person in his arms cried even harder, her tears splashing on his chest, but she hugged his neck tightly, as if she had grabbed a life-saving straw.
"I'm sorry...Brother Lin, I'm sorry..."
"Okay, stop crying." Lin Yan patted his back gently, his fingertips stroking his hot cheeks. "It's good that you know you're wrong. Don't do this again in the future, do you hear me? I'll be really angry if your body collapses."
Si Zhui nodded vigorously in his arms, and her crying gradually subsided, but she still held him tightly, afraid that if she let go, the embrace would disappear.
Sunlight streamed into the ward through the window, casting a warm glow on the figures of the two embracing. Lin Yan held the little one in his arms, feeling a mixture of emotions.
He was angry at his stupidity and his lack of self-care, but he felt even more distressed about his anxiety and his cautious dependence.
It seems that his previous cold treatment really hurt the child's heart, making him feel so insecure.
"When you're better," Lin Yan lowered his head and gently kissed him on the forehead, his voice so gentle that it could drip water, "I'll take you to New York."
Si Zhui suddenly raised his head, his eyes red and filled with disbelief: "Really?"
"Really." Lin Yan smiled and nodded, wiping the tears from his face. "After work, I'll take you to see the Statue of Liberty, okay?"
Si Zhui nodded vigorously, tears falling again, but this time with relief and joy.
Lin Yan looked at him and sighed inwardly. It seemed that from now on, he would have to slowly teach this child that true security wasn't gained by tying himself up or hurting himself, but rather by the promises he made, the looks that said, "I won't leave."
And he will spend the rest of his life slowly teaching him.
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
