Chapter 31: Human Hearts Are Evil
011 was only thinking of bad ideas at the moment. As a system, he naturally couldn't tell the difference between green tea and non-green tea.
The red panda clutched its tail, pondering for a long time. Finally, an idea struck him, and he was about to discuss it with his host when Qin Buyang suddenly spoke up, "You're all covered in water. It would be terrible if your condition worsens. I'll have my adjutant take you to change clothes."
A deep and magnetic voice fell, and 011 looked over and found that the red-haired man was smiling and seemed to be in a good mood.
It was clearly a mockery of Galliard.
"A human of Qin Buyang's age could be Uncle Galliard's, so why is he still bullying others?" The red panda, taking advantage of the fact that no one could see him, raised his tail in indignation and waved his paws in the direction of the red-haired man.
After he finished speaking, he quickly covered his mouth with his paws, and suddenly remembered that this was not what a villain system should say.
Just as 011 hummed twice to hide his guilt and was about to roll around on the host's legs as if nothing had happened, Qin Buyang suddenly felt guilty, but when he looked over again with his chin in his hand, he found that the smile on the red-haired man's face had disappeared.
Instead, the veins on his forehead were throbbing as if he was angry.
011 tilted his head in confusion and surprise, quickly grasping two of the host's fingers and covering his ears with them, hugging his tail and pretending to be fearless. "Host, why is he suddenly looking at you again? Don't be afraid, host! If Qin Buyang bullies you, I will definitely protect you!"
Although red pandas tend to bully the weak and fear the strong, they are still very enthusiastic when it comes to speaking.
Sure enough, the next second, 011 was patted on the head by the host, with an extremely grateful look on his face. He instantly felt a sense of responsibility to protect the weak, hummed twice, and twitched his ears proudly.
"..." When Qin Buyang heard what the little bastard said, he didn't know why he was inexplicably accused of bullying others again.
Does he look like a bad guy?
It's obvious that Gary is as pretentious as a mannequin in a clothing store, the two brothers Uriel and Is are like robots, Lu Tai is so gloomy that it's scary when he goes out, Fran looks like a taciturn person but actually has evil intentions bubbling in his belly, and Cedric is a bad guy with such bad male ethics that it's obvious at first glance that he is not a good person.
From this we can see that he should be the type of person most favored by the red panda!
No matter what Qin Buyang thought, 011 inexplicably felt that this human was not a good person. Like Cedric, he would say some strange things.
He looked away, out of sight, out of mind, observing Gary stealthily, muttering to himself, "Don't go, or I'll embarrass you in front of everyone... No, I mean, you'll fall into Qin Buyang's trap!"
011 wagged his tail, and while muttering to himself, he did not forget to deliberately discredit Qin Buyang.
Humph, it’s this red-haired guy’s fault for trying to ruin my plan!
Thinking of this, the red panda seemed to grow two devil horns on its head and turned into an evil red panda, rubbing its hands together and wanting to teach him a lesson.
[How about this, I'll secretly tie his shoelaces together and make him fall flat on his face in front of so many people.]
[No, it seems like leather shoes don’t have laces…]
011 was working hard to hatch a huge conspiracy, not noticing the helpless smiles on the faces of several humans around him, especially Galliard, the "victim".
The blond young man listened to the red panda's voice and was really worried that the red panda wouldn't be able to figure it out and would cry.
"Don't bother, General Qin. It would be a shame if your water cup spilled and you had no clothes to change into." Galliard smiled gently and warmly, seemingly talking to Qin Buyang, but in fact he spoke slowly on purpose so that a certain little panda who was secretly doing mischief in the shadows could hear clearly.
Maybe that's just how humans are.
Although there were paintings of red pandas on his clothes, he couldn't help but feel annoyed when he saw the dense graffiti on Qin Buyang's clothes, which were even more than his own.
Qin Buyang noticed his look and snorted.
Is this envy?
It was worth it that after the red panda left, he secretly stayed up late to learn the red panda's handwriting and drew an entire shirt.
011's attention was drawn to him. He inexplicably remembered a saying among human beings: one trick can conquer all. Who said that a conspiracy cannot be used a second time?
The red panda gave an evil smile.
He rubbed his furry face with his paws, looked at his host cat and said stealthily, "Host, host, I have another great way to earn points!"
Although you can't get much by bullying the villain, a fly leg is still meat and it is better than nothing.
"?" As soon as Qin Buyang heard what the little bastard said, he knew that he was going to do something bad again. Everything else didn't matter, but so many people present had the red panda mark on their bodies. If he didn't have it, wouldn't it make him seem the least liked one?
Clothes must never be taken off.
So just as he was about to sneak over and give him a surprise attack, he noticed that Qin Buyang was so stupid that he couldn't hold the water cup steady and spilled it on his trouser leg. He frowned and said in annoyance, "I'm so unlucky today. Not only did someone ruin my clothes, but I also spilled water all over myself."
He looks so pitiful and wretched.
[Hehe, I didn't expect Qin Buyang to be this stupid without me, the mastermind behind the scenes, pushing him.] 011 felt relieved now. He lazily shook his tail and sat up straight again, accepting the paw massage that his host used to please him.
The red panda's words echoed in the silent space. Uriel, who was sitting in the center, took off his glasses and pressed his sore temples.
I'm afraid it's certain now that these guys, who are so stupid that he can hardly recognize them, can also hear what the red panda said.
However, Uriel did not speak, but his mind kept uncontrollably recalling the time during the assessment when she lay on his legs and let him knead the small ball of apple in her arms and bite it.
He is naturally indifferent to emotions, so perhaps small animals can also sense that something is wrong with him and are unwilling to get close to him.
It was the first time for Uriel to touch such a small animal which looked like bacteria and dust in his eyes. It was also the first time that such a weak little creature which looked like it would break if pinched was willing to get close to him.
Also said.
Trust him.
Uriel couldn't describe the feeling, but he felt that it was not as bad as he had imagined.
011 was trying to plot a big conspiracy in his mind while pulling at the host's fingers. Just as he was about to ask the host what he thought, he found that Uriel, who had been silent all this time, suddenly stood up and pushed his glasses, perhaps because he had the same social anxiety as his brother.
Then he spoke calmly, "I asked you to come here to discuss the assessment."
"Since the assessment records of that day were affected by Advent, there are many scenes that we cannot see. I want to know how you knew about Advent?" Uriel returned to his working state and asked with his head tilted.
But in fact, he already had a guess in his mind.
I'm afraid it also has something to do with that little panda.
The red panda Ben Cat 011 didn't realize that he had been scolded hundreds of times without knowing it. When he heard Uriel's question, he tilted his head and looked at Fran and Cedric beside him.
To be honest, he was also a little curious.
[Is this the legendary protagonist's aura? Wherever you go, you'll learn some shocking secrets.] 011 recalled some of his previous hosts and found that this seemed to be the case.
Wherever the protagonist of a suspense novel goes, the person is gone. Wherever the protagonist of a Long Aotian novel goes, he is bullied and slapped in the face...
[It seems that the protagonist's halo is not necessarily a good thing.]
011 suddenly felt a little sorry for the protagonist. As expected, he looked over and noticed that Fran's drooping dark eyelashes were trembling slightly. He pursed his lips and pondered for a moment before speaking, "I think it might be because of the provocation of the Advent."
"After the orientation meeting that day, I unexpectedly received an anonymous letter reminder."
Fran seemed to know nothing.
[Hmph, it seems my handwriting is pretty good. The protagonist even thought it was written by a human!] 011 looked at the protagonist Fran's serious and upright expression and scratched the host with his claws. [Does the host also think my handwriting has improved?]
For the sake of the 10,000-point year-end bonus that is so close at hand, this world is the one in which he has been most involved.
I have written several times using my claws.
This must be the reason why he has such good handwriting!
011, being a system, naturally wasn't shy. Seeing the host nod in response to his words, he immediately became extremely pleased. "This way, when I return to the system space to complain to the supervisor, I can change the font so he can't recognize it."
[I can ask you to help me write it later.]
He asked the big cat seniors who had laughed at him in the system space before and said how could Rousong Bun write? Let them take a look!
He is not an illiterate person!
After saying these words, the red panda looked up at the host, wondering why the host didn't follow the routine and praise him this time. But looking at the host's eyes which were as dark as a deep pool, he inexplicably felt that the host seemed very happy.
He didn't notice at all that some of the men behind him frowned and some almost gritted their teeth when they heard his last words.
"Tsk." Qin Buyang smiled with his fake smile. He must have been very happy inside, but on the surface he pretended to be gloomy in order to seduce the young man named Red Panda. He originally thought that everyone was starting from the same starting line.
As a result, this plain-looking guy with no redeeming features on his body was about to elope with the red panda.
How is he inferior to this poor boy?
011 felt as if he was being watched. He felt uneasy as his entire system was being watched. He was a little puzzled as to why the person who was just chatting with him was just staring at them without saying anything.
Moreover, the protagonists and villains seem to be a little different from our previous impressions, and seem to be particularly fierce.
Could it be that he discovered that his host was a villain? No, his host hadn't been picked up by the Advent yet, so there was no way he could turn into that cruel and bloodthirsty villain.
The host is obviously as obedient as a good dog.
And they do bad things secretly.
The little panda thought so, and felt uncomfortable being stared at by a group of people, so he shrank into the host's arms, and skillfully covered his head with the host's hands like a small shell, fully arming himself.
She had no idea that this scene of hers would be seen as adorable and frightening by others.
Lu Tai, who usually doesn't like to laugh, curled his lips slightly.
Then he successfully received a room full of hostile looks.
011 had no qualms about using the host as a shield. Hearing everyone resuming their conversation, he pawed at the host's palm and quietly peeped out his eyes. "Huh, it turns out they don't have any intention of fighting. Just now, seeing their expressions, I thought they were going to do it."
Humans are truly strange creatures.
The red panda thought so and secretly wrote a line of big words in his human observation diary: Humans are bad! The system is good!
After doing all this, he secretly glanced at the host and saw that he didn't seem to notice, so he put the diary into the system space, waiting for the time when he would remember to write a few more words.
While he was hesitating, the conversation on Uriel's side was coming to an end.
011 could tell from his words that he probably didn't get any useful information from them, and he immediately became complacent again, "How could my high-tech red panda be easily discovered by you little humans?"
The high-tech red panda completely forgot about the bug.
He scrolled through the progress bar, looking at the newly earned points, and, as usual, pretended to ask the host, "Our villain value increased by 5.8% this time, giving us 5,800 points! We split it 50-50, and it's already been transferred to your account."
He 011 is not that stupid. The host will give him points every time he completes a task.
I thought he wouldn't know.
In fact, all the points were secretly hidden in the small treasury waiting for upgrades. The little panda didn't feel guilty at all and just regarded it as a gift from the younger brother to the boss, as protection money!
At this moment, the host's voice sounded, "Okay."
011 had his hair rubbed on his head by a large hand, and was about to proudly accept the points. However, after waiting for a long time, there was no notification of the points being credited. The little panda was extremely confused, "Could it be that there was a bug in the system again that prevented me from hearing it?"
[This annoying bug is about to spit out my points!]
He took another look at his account balance and angrily slapped the virtual panel with his paw.
They even want to snatch the points of a poor guy like him!
At this time, almost everyone in the room could hear the red panda angrily repairing something with his paws, making such a loud clapping sound that he almost tore it apart.
It was the first time for them to see Yaoyao so angry.
Yaoyao clapped for a long time but didn't get any points. Just as he was about to continue clapping, he was grabbed by the host's big hand and held down with two claws. Then the host's rare and somewhat complicated voice rang out, "Excuse me, Professor Uriel, where is the bathroom?"
He was being held down and unable to move. When he heard the host's words, he twitched his ears and subconsciously looked around the room. There was no bathroom in Uriel's office.
011 angrily glanced at the red exclamation marks that appeared almost everywhere on the panel, baring his fangs. "If you don't spit it out, I'll bite you."
[When I get out, I'll beat you up with the host!]
It was the first time he encountered a bug that would cause points to be lost.
Just as 011 was considering whether to use the few points he had saved to fix his bug, he suddenly heard Uriel in front of him say, "I have a general understanding of the situation."
"It's lunchtime now. I'm sorry to take up your weekend break. I'll pay for whatever you want to eat today."
When he heard about eating 011, he immediately forgot about the points. He wiped his saliva with his paw and then remembered that Uriel was answering his host's question just now. He hurriedly tugged at his host's sleeve with his paw.
[Host, host, it would be a waste if you don't eat it. Villains like us just love to take advantage of others. We will definitely be hated by everyone.]
Of course this is not the main reason.
011 has never tasted interstellar food. Most of the interstellar worlds he has visited before were high-tech and low-life, and everyone drank nutrient solution that had little chewing texture.
Just like what he drank in the system space.
This world is different. There is a lot of biodiversity. Although there is pollution, it is actively controlled by the military, and the land and animal husbandry are not greatly affected.
And there were many more ingredients that he had never seen before.
011 was extremely greedy when he thought about the strange and delicious foods he had seen on Starnet before. This time he wanted to go to the store to see what they looked like with his own eyes.
Even if he can't eat it, he can just watch from the side and then go back and brag about it to the seniors in the system.
He is an anthropologist!
It just looks like the host doesn't really want to go.
But 011 is not worried at all. Although the host has not spoken yet, he believes that the host will agree in the end.
Thinking of this, the little panda closed his eyes and stuck out his tongue.
The four claws went limp, tugging at the host's sleeves as if they had no strength left. [Host, I'm so sad. Host, don't you know that if the system is sad, it will die!]
011 pretended to be dead while secretly opening his round cat eyes a little to look over.
Sure enough, within three seconds, he found that the host finally sighed helplessly, released his hand, nodded, and rubbed his head before looking at Uriel, "Thank you, Professor Uriel."
"Host, host, I heard there's a restaurant nearby called something like 'Internet Green' or 'Internet Red'! How about we go there?" The red panda immediately became lively upon hearing the host's words.
He has been a little addicted to watching short videos recently and has seen recommendations for this store several times.
Looking at the clingy little panda, how could Lu Tai not agree? He finally managed to make him forget about the points issue. But before he could say anything, Qin Buyang next to him said, "I heard there's a delicious, internet-famous, thousand-year-old restaurant nearby. How about we go check it out?"
"I didn't expect that although Qin Buyang is a fool, his taste is as good as mine." 011 was instantly satisfied after hearing this.
Reluctantly forgiving him for nearly ruining his grand scheme to embarrass Galliard, he turned back and tugged at the host's sleeve, his eyes narrowing into small crescents. "Host, tell me when the time comes what it tastes like. I'll write it down in my observation journal."
011 feels a little guilty.
If the host knew about this, he would definitely think he was vain. After all, it was said that some humans would feel vain when they saw others eating the small fruits that Qin Buyang gave him. The red panda felt that although he was a little vain, he was still a red panda who cared about his reputation.
"Okay, I've already booked a private room there." Qin Buyang, who was standing aside, curled his lips when he heard the little panda's mumbling. He was much more useful than his host.
He specifically asked his mother and learned that if he wanted to gain favor, he had to make the person he liked feel cared for.
I think the same is true for red pandas.
Although he is not obsessed with plush toys, who wouldn't be confused when seeing the chubby and somewhat silly red panda in the light brain? Why can that guy touch it every day!
011 didn't know about the red-haired man's twists and turns, and only felt that Qin Buyang was a barely qualified younger brother.
Seeing everyone around him stand up and walk out, he bit the host's sleeve and tugged, "Host, you still haven't answered my question? You need to tell me if the food in this thousand-year-old restaurant is good!"
Both ears were pressed back hard.
However, to his surprise, the host didn't answer him immediately but looked at the others. "My cousin has temporarily left her pet kitten with me. I'm afraid it won't be well without someone to feed it at noon. Do you mind if I bring it along?"
[?] Hearing this, 011 shook his head in surprise. [Host, are you still asleep? When did you get a cat?]
He looked the host up and down, and there clearly didn't seem to be anything strange about him. Just as he was about to ask more questions, he suddenly saw the host's light brain with a line of words written on it.
—I'm taking you out for dinner today. Didn't you say you wanted to go to that restaurant? I'll redeem your points for a real deal.
[QAQ Host, you're such a good person.] 011 hadn't expected the host to have a hidden stash of money, but after realizing it would ultimately be used against him, he immediately forgave him. [Hehe, with me around, I can definitely bankrupt Uriel!]
He was so proud that he didn't notice the dim look in his host's eyes.
Lu Tai really didn't want the red panda to be exposed to other people's eyes. Thinking that most people would not be able to accept sharing a dining table with other people's pets, he came up with this reason.
But it looks like the red panda really wants to have dinner with these people.
[But I remember that Galliard is very mysophobic. Will he tolerate eating with small animals?] 011 feels that the host is stupid. What if they don't invite him to dinner after saying this?
However, just when his plan was about to fail, he saw that the protagonist and villain in the room unexpectedly did not refuse.
He looked quite expectant.
011 once again lamented how strange humans really were. "Then just bite the bullet and agree to this. Even if you hate me later, I won't leave your table!"
Maybe you can even earn some villain points.
After all, he is officially his host's cat.
"Tsk." Qin Buyang beside him laughed. What did those girls say when they saw the stray cats on campus and abused them? Oh, yes, kittens are meant to be eaten.
This little bastard is really brave. By then, not only will he be kicked off the table, I'm afraid he won't even be able to escape.
See if he is scared.
011 was unaware of the sinister intentions of these humans. He stood on the host's shoulder with his tail wagging proudly. He watched them agree on the location and time for the meeting, then he looked down at everyone with a proud and arrogant look as he and the host left the military headquarters.
While he was thinking about what to eat next, he suddenly saw the host suddenly turned into a pet supply store.
"Host, do you really have a cat? Aren't we going to eat? Why are we here?" 011 was wondering, but then suddenly it dawned on him, "I understand, Host. You must be trying to pretend you have a pet in a pet store, right?"
It perfectly fits the lie just now.
He wagged his tail and floated down, watching his host looking around. Just as he was about to ask what he was looking for, he saw his host stop and look at the delicate pet clothes on the side - a pile of puffy skirts.
[?] 011 felt something was amiss. Didn't the host come here pretending to pick up a pet? Why did she suddenly look like she was wearing a skirt?
He even picked it up and pointed it at him.
Although the system has no gender, 011 has always regarded himself as a male red panda.
Just as he was about to slip away, a pair of large hands, anticipating his escape route, grabbed him and dragged him down. The host's deep, serious voice, tinged with a hint of academic discussion, rang out, "Yaoyao, you stand out too much. I'm afraid everyone will recognize you as a tall, mighty, and ferocious red panda at a glance."
"It's a rare animal. Once it wears this and covers up its ears and fur, no one will notice it."
011 saw the host shaking the small cloak in his hand, which had a cute bow and lace edges. His pupils suddenly dilated and became round like a cat's, but he was also a little dizzy because of the host's praise.
He touched it carefully with his paw.
[Really?]
[If I wear this, will it cover up my carnivorous features?]
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