Chapter 21 Let's Break Up
"He's a clueless idiot; he deserves to live like this."
Mu Yan was stunned.
Upon hearing those words, his mind seemed to explode.
He stared blankly at Lu Chong, his lips trembling slightly, as if he couldn't believe he would say such a thing.
Because he was never good at arguing with people, he didn't say a word when he should have defended his brother.
He always knew that Lu Chong looked down on his brother.
Unlike Lu Chong's stark dislike for Lin Guojun, Mu Yan's feelings were simply indifference, a mere feeling that Lin Guojun wasn't one of his own. Mu Yan had always known this, but he had always pretended not to.
An older brother is an older brother, and a lover is a lover. They don't need to live under the same roof, nor are they related by blood. As long as Lu Chong doesn't say anything, Mu Yan can pretend he knows nothing.
But this time, it was the first time that Lu Chong had laid bare his contempt for his family in such a bloody way.
Lu Chong met his brother for the first time during the Spring Festival of the year after his family's tragedy.
On New Year's Eve after their mother fell ill, they would bring her home from the hospital so the whole family could have a meal together.
Mu Yan had never asked Lu Chong about his family situation in detail until the day before New Year's Eve, when Mu Yan noticed that he hadn't packed his things yet, and then cautiously asked him.
“I won’t go back. There’s nothing good about it.” Lu Chong answered without looking up.
"If you don't go home, won't your parents worry about you?"
“No,” Lu Chong said without blinking, “My father is dead, and my mother remarried.”
Mu Yan was stunned.
Even though her own family situation wasn't necessarily much better than Lu Chong's, Mu Yan still couldn't help but feel a sharp pain in her heart when she heard Lu Chong's calm tone.
"Will you come home with me?"
Lu Chong nodded and agreed.
Mu Yan went to the market to buy meat and New Year's goods. When introducing Lu Chong to her mother and brother, she only said that he was a friend from City A who hadn't been able to get a train ticket home, so she brought him back.
Lu Chong kept a straight face and greeted his mother and the others politely.
The elderly and their grandchildren are naturally very close. After the mother fell ill, she saw Jiajia less often. Now, she even had to hold Jiajia and feed her first during the New Year's Eve dinner. Jiajia is also very attached to her and doesn't even want Lin Yi to hold her.
Later, Mu Yan wanted his mother to eat first, so after much persuasion, he brought his little niece over and asked, "Uncle, can you feed me?"
Children aren't always well-behaved while eating; even the most obedient child will have their moments of mischief. Mu Yan had to coax her three or four times to feed her a single bite of food.
"Little Lu, would you like some? It's homemade."
Xiang Zhuo enjoys a little wine now and then; his family makes some low-alcohol fruit wine every year. It's sweet, delicious, and not easy to get drunk on.
"No, thank you. I don't like drinking." Lu Chong's fingers rested on the glass, a clear gesture of refusal.
Xiang Zhuo felt a little embarrassed and picked up the drink again: "Would you like some yogurt?"
Lu Chong didn't say anything, he just kept shaking his head.
Lu Chong never drinks beverages that don't even have a brand name.
Mu Yan quickly explained for him, "Brother Xiang Zhuo, his stomach isn't very good, he can't drink this."
"Oh, okay." Xiang Zhuo, having gotten a way out, went along with Mu Yan's words and didn't say anything more.
Mu Yan somewhat regretted bringing Lu Chong home. Perhaps his wish to prevent Lu Chong from spending New Year's Eve alone was just wishful thinking; Lu Chong didn't like such occasions. After a while, he nervously turned his head to glance at Lu Chong, wanting to see if he was unhappy.
At this moment, Lu Chong frowned, patted his left sleeve very lightly, and a deep disgust flashed in his eyes, but it disappeared in an instant.
Mu Yan was sitting to his left. Just now... it seems Jiajia bumped into him.
Mu Yan didn't have time to think about anything else, nor did she know what to say to him. She just pulled Jiajia a little to the left, hoping she wouldn't accidentally bump into Lu Chong again.
At that time, he should have known that Lu Chong didn't like his brother.
“Lu Chong,” Mu Yan’s tears welled up, “he is my brother.”
How could you say that about my brother?
Lu Chong's expression darkened further.
Lin Yi, it's always because of Lin Yi.
All the boundless tenderness and tolerance Mu Yan showed him would be taken back every time because of this brother who was not related to him by blood.
Lu Chong did not avoid his gaze, and his tone remained completely calm, as if he were stating a fact: "Isn't that right? A stupid omega from the countryside who didn't even finish college, who knows how he made money as a salesman."
Mu Yan's heart clenched, as if his chest had been squeezed tightly, making it difficult to breathe for a moment. His eyes were red, and his nails dug deeply into his palms as he desperately held back his tears.
“He’s my brother…” Mu Yan’s voice trembled slightly, but she spoke each word clearly, as if she wanted Lu Chong to hear it clearly, “My tuition for A University was earned by him penny by penny. I know you’ve always looked down on my brother.”
He looked up at Lu Chong, his voice low and hoarse, yet filled with stubbornness, "I also come from the countryside. Have you always thought I was an idiot?"
The air fell into a deathly silence.
Lu Chong's expression froze slightly, as if he hadn't expected Mu Yan to say those words. Looking at the other's reddened eyes, he suddenly felt as if something had stabbed him in the heart.
But this discomfort was quickly overshadowed by irritability: "Stop bringing up the past. I'm just stating the facts. Setting a password that Lin Guojun can guess is just plain stupid. Calm down."
Mu Yan did not argue with Lu Chong any further.
He stood there with his head down, his fingertips gripping the hem of his clothes tightly, as if trying to calm his emotions. After a long while, he slowly took a breath, and when he raised his head again, his eyes had regained their calm.
“You’re right,” Mu Yan said, gripping the handle without turning to look at Lu Chong. “I’m going out to calm down for a bit.”
The door slammed shut after he left.
This rental house has seen countless generations of tenants come and go, yet the door remains remarkably sturdy. No matter how roughly it's handled, it simply locks itself quietly.
Perhaps one day in the future, it will also break down without warning.
In Lu Chong's memory, he seemed to have slammed the door and run away from home many times after losing his temper with Mu Yan, but this seemed to be the first time Mu Yan had slammed the door.
Lu Chong stared at the door, his eyes swirling with conflicting emotions.
It was already late at night.
The motion-sensor lights, which had been in disrepair for years, did not immediately turn on when Mu Yan's footsteps were heard. It wasn't until Mu Yan had walked through the dimly lit stairwell and gone down half a floor that the lights at his front door behind him came on, casting a long shadow in front of him.
After being far from home, Mu Yan finally had time to reach out and touch his face.
I touched something wet.
At this hour, the vibrant nightlife of City A's CBD might just be beginning, but here, only the reflections of streetlights on the river sway quietly.
Lu Chong dislikes his family; didn't he always know that?
Why did I only feel angry now? Why did I only realize now that if he truly respected me, he wouldn't have treated his brother that way?
Mu Yan was actually angry with himself.
Mu Yan's phone kept ringing in his pocket. He didn't dare to turn it off. His job didn't require him to work overtime often, but if something unexpected happened, he would have to go back, so he had to keep his phone accessible.
Mu Yan hung up on Lu Chong's call once, but the phone kept ringing incessantly.
Mu Yan answered the call but did not speak.
"Have you calmed down yet?" Lu Chong's voice came through the phone, sounding somewhat distorted and particularly distressing. "Come back when you've calmed down."
"I've calmed down," Mu Yan said softly.
"Then hurry back. Why are you copying others? Going out dressed so lightly, if you get sick, I won't have time to take you to the hospital."
Lu Chong was right; the temperature by the river was lower than in other parts of the city. Mu Yan wrapped his clothes tighter around himself.
It was actually a bit cold because the wind would blow in down your neck.
"No."
Mu Yan's voice was very soft, so soft that it seemed to dissipate along with the white vapor he exhaled.
"Nothing is needed?"
“If I get sick, you don’t need to take me to the hospital,” Mu Yan said.
Lu Chong seemed to have forgotten that they had only known each other for three years, and he had spent the last twenty years of his life alone.
If I get sick, I can buy medicine myself, or if all else fails, my brother and friends can take care of me.
He has his own family and friends, his own life and aspirations for the future; he wasn't born waiting for the moment he would meet Lu Chong.
No one is indispensable to anyone else.
"What do you mean?" Lu Chong asked coldly.
He noticed that Mu Yan's tone was a little off. Although it was still as gentle and peaceful as usual, there was something different about it.
"Lu Chong, let's break up."
“Okay,” Lu Chong said. “Mu Yan, I’ll ask you one more time, you want to break up, right?”
The wind along the river comes in gusts; it's currently quite windy.
This area is an economic development zone, and the wind here isn't just wind; it carries sand and dust. Mu Yan's eyes are sensitive, and the wind kept making her eyes water.
“Yes,” Mu Yan repeated, “Let’s break up, Lu Chong.”
"Okay," Lu Chong agreed. "Just don't regret it. Mu Yan, do you really think you're some hot commodity that I can't live without you? Or are you in such a hurry to break up with me to go find your good roommate?"
"I never thought that way. All these years, it's always been... that I can't live without you."
All these years, it's been him who loves Lu Chong, it's been him who can't live without Lu Chong.
But now, he doesn't seem to be so dependent on Lu Chong anymore.
He still liked Lu Chong. Liking someone can't be erased in an instant, but disappointment can also reach its peak in an instant.
"But I don't want to be with you anymore."
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