My name is Fu Yong, and I am... no, I used to be a chef.
I'm probably thirty-three years old this year.
My memory has been a bit muddled lately, and I can't remember clearly.
Although it seems a bit strange now, I have always been a very ordinary person.
Perhaps it's true that whatever is lacking, it needs to be added to the name.
Although my name contains the character for "brave," I have never been a brave person since I was a child.
I'm afraid of bright light, afraid of being scolded by my parents, afraid that my bad exam results will be exposed, afraid that the girl I have a crush on will be won over by someone else...
I've been living a life of meekly acceptance, avoiding conflict with others, and being submissive.
I once thought about ending it all, but I gave up because I... was afraid of dying.
Death is too cruel and terrifying; I can't accept it...
I've never been a brave person in my life.
Except for that one time.
My wife is my childhood sweetheart; we've been classmates since we were little. She's not a daring person, and she's been bullied a bit because of her personality.
In the end, the two of us, both cowards, licked our wounds and came together, and that was alright.
After several of our elders passed away, we left the village where we grew up and came to this unfamiliar city to start over, where we opened a small restaurant together.
I was the chef, and she was the waitress. Business wasn't great, but it wasn't bad either.
We, two not-so-brave people, ended up living the ordinary life we had once hoped for.
Life wasn't easy, but my wife never complained.
And such a kind woman, a woman who is willing to tolerate my weakness...
But he died because of me.
If I hadn't casually mentioned that I wanted to one day be able to properly teach my own children...
If our child can grow up to be a truly brave and good child who doesn't bully others, she won't even think about having a child.
She will not die in childbirth.
It's all my fault.
It's all my fault!
The day I lost her, I felt like my whole world collapsed.
While feeling angry and injustice towards fate, I also felt boundless fear.
Fear of death.
I want to go with her, but I can't...
I'm afraid of dying.
I was so scared that I cried and eventually even fainted.
I'm such a loser.
But after waking up from that coma, I felt something change in myself.
In the days that followed, I began to have some unclear memories, living in a daze, and I became completely different from the person I used to be.
I feel like I've become a different person, filled with murderous desires, aggressive, and more suspicious...
Having lost my purpose in life, a new idea came to my mind—I want revenge.
Avenge her.
I returned to our hometown and found everyone who had ever bullied her, making them pay the price they owed her for so long.
Even if they have forgotten, I will not forget, and neither will she.
I remember every face of every person, every perpetrator, so clearly!
But after I finished doing all that, I was somewhat lost in the thrill of power.
When I started wanting to take revenge on others, on those who hadn't lent us a helping hand...
I met someone.
A young woman with golden eyes and long silver hair exuded a repulsive aura.
I remember she looked regretful at the time, and it seemed like she was saying to me, "Let's end it here. She wouldn't want to see you continue like this."
I felt like I'd seen her somewhere before, but I couldn't quite place it.
Driven by desire, I seemed to rush towards her, wanting to torment those people as I had before...
Then, the nightmare began.
That woman was like a demon.
She repeatedly threw me down, breaking my ribs, which healed, then broke again...
Time and time again, over and over, until I felt my body and mind separating, and I was on the verge of a complete breakdown.
I can't remember when she stopped, and I can't remember anything else she said, but her last sentence is etched deep in my soul.
"You cannot attack ordinary people, otherwise I will personally eliminate you."
When I regained my senses, I found myself in the restaurant's kitchen.
There are no restaurants with my wife.
I dared not go out, surviving on the leftover food in the freezer. I huddled in the shadows, afraid that the devilish woman would come knocking on my door again.
Half a year, a year?
I can't remember clearly, but I do remember that about two weeks ago, the last of the food was eaten, but I still didn't dare to go out.
After a week of starvation, I seemed to be hallucinating, as if I was half-asleep and half-awake, occasionally drawing something with my own blood, something very important...
Then one day, I suddenly woke up because I felt a breath that made me thirsty approach!
I saw the other person through the crack in the door.
It was a man, a man who exuded a sweet fragrance!
But before I could do anything, he turned around and glanced at me, and I completely lost consciousness...
It was painful at first, but it quickly became comfortable, like being back in my wife's arms.
But then, I don't know what happened, I felt like my body was being constantly drained, then healed, then drained again...
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