Chapter 49
If a person's death date is clear, what will you do before that day arrives?
Some people choose to spend all their savings on traveling, having fun, and enjoying themselves to the end.
Some people refuse to give up and choose to fight to the end.
Some people wait for death to come like every other day.
I stared at the food on the plate in a daze. One moment I felt like overturning the table and yelling, "I quit!" The next moment I felt like calmly paying the bill and quickly finishing the accumulated work for the day. The next moment I didn't want to do anything and just wanted to stay in my chair and freeze into a sculpture.
How can I resist? The opponent is a transcendent, with the striking power of a nuclear weapon. Let alone a nuclear weapon, even a small bullet would kill me.
Should I ask Lan Tang for help? He seems to want me to be betrayed so much. Isn't this what he expects?
Should I ask Mr. Mori for help? ...No, forget it.
Nakahara Chuuya, Dazai Osamu?
…
*
While I was thinking, I heard the sound of someone knocking on the glass.
I looked over and saw Chuuya bending over. He mouthed to me, “What are you thinking about?”
I raised my eyebrows, smiled and said to him, "I was just daydreaming."
…
The rain had stopped by then, and after returning the umbrella, Chuuya Nakahara slowly walked back to where I lived with me.
"You and Dazai live in a very remote place. No matter how you think about it, you shouldn't let a girl go home alone at night. Don't work today. Didn't you stay up all night yesterday?"
“Hey, that was yesterday’s mission… Well, since it’s Chuuya’s request, I’ll accept it with reluctance.”
I focused on the small puddle on the side of the road and asked Chuuya without thinking, "Why did you come back?"
"I was supposed to come back anyway. I had to return the umbrella. And as I just said, it's not nice to let a girl go home alone at night."
"Oh - so that's how it is."
I jumped into a puddle, splashing a lot of water, and both Nakahara Chuuya and I were wet.
*
After Zhongyuan Chuuya taught me a lesson, I kicked the puddles on the roadside in dissatisfaction, bringing up strings of water droplets.
"Chuuya, if you had to die at some point, how would you spend your time before that?"
"This is a really unlucky question." He looked up at the warm yellow street lights.
"As for me...if there really is such a moment, I will probably open a bottle of red wine, draw the curtains and look at the scenery outside, no matter if it is sunny and the sky is clear, or it is rainy and dark, or just cloudy...no matter what, I will accept any kind of weather, and then flip through an old book by myself and recall my life."
"It's cool. It feels so cool."
He scratched his head, a little embarrassed. "Well, although I don't think that kind of time will ever happen, unless I'm really old or something... Why are you asking this question? Do you have any difficulties? If you have anything, tell me and I'll help you."
He looked at me seriously.
…
"It seems that what Dazai Osamu said is right."
"Huh? What did he say again?" Nakahara Chuuya became angry when he mentioned Dazai Osamu.
"He said something like 'black slugs just like to mind their own business' or something like that."
"Tsk, I knew he couldn't produce ivory... Wait, you say I'm meddling in other people's business?" He took a step back in horror.
"The thing I feared most finally happened." He said heavily.
"Haha." I felt a little schadenfreude.
The road is not long and will soon end.
I waved at him very hard and shouted at him loudly, "Bye! Be careful not to be followed by stalkers on your way back!"
"Stop nagging! I won't be followed! Even if I am, I'm not the one who should be worried!" He answered me in a loud voice, probably because he was afraid that I couldn't hear him.
I smiled and waved at him, then watched him leave.
*
"Are you satisfied now?"
I took off the wiretap that I had just discovered was stuck to my collar when I was delivering crab buns to someone this morning.
He didn't turn on the lights, and the container was pitch black.
I groped my way in the darkness and hugged his waist, pushing the headphones back from his neck until they were down his neck, and buried my face in his neck as if I was hungry for skin.
He sat in a corner where no light reached him, but he could still see the bright lights across the street.
It's like being exiled, far away from this planet.
He smiled helplessly and stroked my hair with one hand. "You're so old, but you still like to stick to your brother?"
…
I didn't say anything.
He stroked my hair. "Are you scared?"
"…scared." My voice was muffled, and I tried to keep it as low as possible, as if to prevent a non-existent third person from hearing it.
"Don't be afraid, I'm here."
"fraud."
This promise was no different from the previous one, and he was not 100% sure, nor could he guarantee that he would still be there.
Even he is the same.
"Don't worry about me, I'm a Mafia too, and I'm grown up too."
"Hmm~ Miss Mafia, you've grown up. Do you want to sleep with me today?"
"……good."
*
"Hello, Mr. Lan Tang."
"Oh, look who is willing to come and play with me after being threatened by me?" He put down the newspaper in his hand, supported his chin, and said to me in the unique humorous tone of the French.
"Your partner, Verlaine, has arrived in Yokohama."
"Well, I already know that. Do you want to ask me for help? I'm sorry, but this is the only thing I will never interfere with."
Lan Tang knew exactly what Weilan wanted to do. He just wanted to live his ideal life with a child who was similar to him, Nakahara Chuuya.
He had already made a mistake eight years ago, and the punishment was losing both his partner and his own memory. Although he has now recovered his memory, the gap between him and his partner cannot be eliminated.
He taught Verlaine personally and even gave him the name "Verlaine". He once thought that he and Verlaine were the closest people in the world, but unfortunately, facts made him realize his mistakes.
Was it that his teachings over the years were wrong?
Lan Tang has been thinking about this question since he recovered his memory.
I feel sad, regretful, and deeply worried about the child.
Verlaine's loneliness is inevitable. Even if an inhuman being has a human body, his smart mind can always see through the rejection of others.
Verlaine has a sensitive heart like everyone else, but fate has given him an inhuman identity. However, he also stands out from the crowd because of his powerful supernatural powers.
Rimbaud asked himself, had he always taken Verlaine to those gatherings in the hope that Verlaine could fit in, been seen by Verlaine as a "freak show" centered around himself?
When Rimbaud thought of this possibility, he felt extremely guilty. He began to recall every detail of his life with Verlaine and those details that he had ignored...
Every time he thought about it, his guilt grew deeper.
And now, he heard the news from Verlaine.
What joyful news this was! He had thought Verlaine had died in the explosion, and had been tormented by the memory every moment, but he had never thought that he was still alive!
But he was afraid to see him.
That man was so proud and stubborn at the same time. If I appeared in front of him, I would undoubtedly be reminding him of his failure and shame.
It is not a bad idea to fight him. Even if I die, as long as it can make him vent his anger, my death is not worth mentioning.
But he was afraid that Weilaine would show him a hateful expression, which would be too hurtful to someone who had given his all to teach him, as if his masterpiece had no fundamental load-bearing foundation and collapsed on him.
That should have crushed the author to death, but due to an accident, the author was able to survive. Every time he saw the collapsed ruins, it was because of his own incompetence and mistakes, not to mention that the collapsed "ruins" were actually just the remnants of half of the author's masterpiece.
The remaining half of it hates the author, hates the author for not being able to give it a complete self, hates the author for praising it so much that it eventually collapses in half.
"But you still want to see him, don't you? If nothing else, don't you think Verlaine wants to see you, too?
You are his mentor and the only person close to him in this world. Without you by his side, he doesn’t know where to go. "
I saw his stunned look and said, “You have said before that you think I can easily see through others. This is also something you personally stamped.
Do you want to meet him?
You want to see Verlaine's, too?"
After listening to what I said, he collapsed on the sofa and remained silent for a long time. He lit a cigarette but didn't smoke it, as if he just wanted to see it burn.
It was like we were playing tug-of-war with an invisible rope, and he could win by just sitting there and not moving, while I had to do everything I could to pull him.
Time passed slowly, and the cigarette butt in his hand fell to the ground. The residual heat of the ashes seemed to wake him up.
Lan Tang looked up at me and said, "I will never intervene to stop Wei Erlan."
Is this a rejection? No, it is not a rejection. I never thought of asking Lan Tang to stop Wei Erlaine from the beginning. I just needed Lan Tang to reach Wei Erlaine.
As long as Lan Tang appears in front of Weilun, it will be my victory.
I nodded slightly. "You just need to go meet him. There is nothing else you need to do."
"Oh, aren't you afraid that I will help him instead? You know, my relationship with him is much better than yours."
"So this is a big gamble. Our bet is pretty much the entire Mafia, and your bet is Verlaine's feelings for you."
"Ha." He snorted coldly, as if he was very skeptical about what I said, or he didn't believe it at all.
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