Chapter 53: That phone call, Zhu Yingning, do you still feel unwilling...
"Come on, come on—who is it?"
Sun Mingyuan heard the doorbell, stretched himself and went to open the door. As soon as he opened the door, he saw Xu Sirui standing at his door holding a tattered straight-handled umbrella, with a cut on the corner of his mouth.
"Fuck, are you going to war?"
Xu Sirui hummed nonchalantly, "I smashed up Zhang Haisheng's office."
"Ah? Holy shit." Sun Mingyuan's eyes widened.
Zhang Haisheng and Xu Zhengkang's relationship is like that of Sun Mingyuan and Xu Sirui: childhood friends. But Zhang Haisheng is a man of many evil intentions. While Xu Zhengkang certainly bears the lion's share of the blame for Xu Sirui's family troubles, Zhang Haisheng, a troublemaker, also bears the blame. Sun Mingyuan had anticipated that Xu Sirui would eventually pick a fight with Zhang Haisheng, but he hadn't expected it to come so soon. It seems Xu Zhengkang's awful plan to hype Zhu Jixiang had truly infuriated him, and he was convinced Zhang Haisheng must have instigated Xu Zhengkang's move.
What the hell is going on?
Sun Mingyuan was overwhelmed, but he could only let Xu Sirui in and asked, "What's wrong with your mouth? Did Zhang hit you?"
"Xu Zhengkang beat me."
"He's really capable of doing that."
"What could he possibly do when he went crazy?" Xu Sirui wiped his lips. "He grabbed a chair and was about to swing it at my head. If Zhang hadn't stopped him, I might have been in the ICU by now."
“…I’m serious.”
"That's why I'm hiding at your house. If I go home now, he'll really stab me to death."
**
After Chen Bin left, Zhu Yingning was still recalling his last words.
He tucked the copy of The Red and the Black from the shelf under his arm and sighed. He seemed to have a thousand words on his mind, but in the end, he only managed one sentence: "Yingning, the teacher still hopes that you will be a Julien-like person."
This was said sincerely, and upon closer inspection it was entirely out of a teacher's selfish love and cherishment for talented people. However, she could not respond to this sincerity because she was destined not to be a Julien-like character. She could not be free from emotion and love, and she could not do anything to achieve her goals. On the contrary, she might be kidnapped by family affection all her life.
The decision to stop studying wasn't forced by anyone; everything happened quite normally, almost dull. There were no arguments, no fights, no falling-outs. It was simply that one evening before the high school entrance exam, as the family sat on a bamboo mat for dinner, Liu Guifang asked, "Who's going to work after the exam to earn money?"
Then--
Then, in a long, suffocating silence, she felt Liu Guifang's gaze on her, as well as Zhu Jixiang's. They said nothing, just staring at her with that look, but her throat moved of its own accord, and she whispered, "I'll go."
Yes, there is no doubt that she was not coerced by anyone's words.
But……
Was she really not coerced?
The gaze, the silence, her sister's personality, and even the heavy burden of family affection on her shoulders, were all holding her hostage in disguise.
Zhu Yingning didn't dare to think about it too much. She was afraid that if she did, she would get a cruel truth. She would find out that what Xu Sirui said in the secret cave that night was true. She would find out that she had never been anyone's first priority from the beginning to the end. She would find out that her understanding seemed to be just the result of discipline.
Life is a muddle-headed one. If the truth is so cruel, she would rather live in confusion.
**
Liu Guifang thought that after the incident of being kicked out during the last home visit, Chen Bin would not come to her house again. Chen Bin himself thought so too. However, things are unpredictable. After visiting Zhu Yingning in the town, he received a call that evening from Xu Zhengkang.
Two days later, Chen Bin went to Zhu Yingning's house again.
This time, Zhu Yingning and Zhu Jixiang were both there. When Liu Guifang saw him, the smile on her face became unusually stiff. Chen Bin was afraid that she would just chase him away, so he could only raise his voice from a distance and repeatedly said, "Good news! Sister Liu, good news!"
Liu Guifang welcomed him into her home with a half-believing and half-doubting look: "Teacher Chen, what's the good news?"
"Good news about your family's good fortune." He said as he put on a shy smile and reached out for water.
Liu Guifang had been sulking, but when she heard that the news he brought was related to Zhu Jixiang, the gloom on her face disappeared. She put on an earnest smile and handed him a bowl of water. "What's the good news? Drink some water and tell me slowly."
Chen Bin gulped down another bellyful of water, patted his belly, and said, "Great news! Sister Liu, do you remember that variety show Jixiang participated in before? Didn't Jixiang move to Xu Sirui's house? Xu Sirui's father called and said he can sponsor Jixiang to go to high school in the city!"
"What!! Really?! Teacher, you are not lying to me, are you? You can't lie to me, are you? Are you telling the truth?!" Liu Guifang screamed immediately, her hands were like iron, tightly gripping Chen Bin's wrists, looking at him excitedly and eagerly, as if as long as she pinched him tight enough, she would be able to feel the reality of the situation.
Chen Bin's face was grimacing with pain. He secretly tried to pull his hand away, but he chuckled and said, "Of course it's true. How could I possibly lie about something like this? Xu Sirui's father said he could sponsor Jixiang to go to private school, and even support him until he graduates from college."
"Xiang'er! Did you hear that?" Liu Guifang then let go of her hand and turned to grab Zhu Jixiang's wrist, she was so excited that she almost shed tears.
Chen Bin gave the mother and son some time to calm down. Only when they stopped holding hands and looking at each other with tears in their eyes did he continue with a smile, "Sister Liu, now not only Jixiang's schooling is solved, but Yingning's schooling is solved too."
Zhu Yingning, who was called, finally woke up from her dream and looked at her blankly. From the moment she heard Xu Sirui's name, she fell into a dream-like trance, not knowing how to react. The only thought in her mind was -
It was him again, and Xu Sirui again. His family owed him a favor again.
Liu Guifang touched her face, not quite understanding. "What's wrong? Did his father also agree to sponsor our Ningning?"
"That's not the case. His father only said he wanted to sponsor a child. However, sponsorship means no money is required. Sister Liu, weren't you worried about tuition fees, so you chose to let Yingning go out to work to support Jixiang's studies? Now Jixiang doesn't need tuition fees, which is a great thing! This means Yingning doesn't have to worry about tuition fees anymore and can go to the county's No. 1 Middle School!"
Zhu Yingning was surprised by these words. With every extra word he spoke, her eyes lit up a little, like a spark lit by the wind. However, just as Chen Bin finished speaking, Liu Guifang's voice rang out in the air: "No!"
Not only Chen Bin was stunned, but Zhu Yingning also looked over blankly.
Liu Guifang frowned and said, "Teacher Chen, you don't understand. Our Jixiang's studies are settled, but what about my husband's medical expenses? Someone still has to earn money to keep him alive! It's not that simple!" As she spoke, she turned her head and glanced at Zhu Yingning, shaking her head, "Ningning, don't blame Mom for being cruel. Right now, you just need to focus on making money and don't think about those trivial things. When your brother goes to the city to study and gets admitted to university, he will make a lot of money in the future, and then you will be able to live a good life."
The light that had just ignited in Zhu Yingning's eyes was extinguished in an instant, as if someone had poured a basin of cold water over her, leaving only a layer of misty darkness.
Chen Bin was stunned for a moment, wanting to plead for Zhu Yingning again, but found himself speechless. Liu Guifang's concerns were not unfounded. Aside from Zhu Jixiang's studies, their family also had to take care of Zhu Dashan's illness. When he received the call, he fully expected that this good news for Zhu Jixiang would also bring good news to Zhu Yingning, but it turned out to be false. The reality is that after climbing a mountain, what awaits you is not the sea, but another mountain.
There are mountains upon mountains, the mountains are long and the waters are far, and the road ahead is long.
**
Teenagers' resistance is extremely limited.
Xu Sirui hid in Sun Mingyuan's house for two days. When he returned to his own home, he soon learned that Xu Zhengkang had called the mountainous area. It was a foregone conclusion that he would fund - or hype - Zhu Jixiang.
He sat in his room for a long time, his mind blank.
Only at such times would he feel his own incompetence most profoundly. Xu Zhengkang was right, he was a parasite, and besides parasitizing, he couldn't do anything else well.
After taking a shower in the evening, he lay on the rattan chair on the balcony, staring at the night view outside in a daze.
I wanted to drink, but it was boring. I wanted to smoke, but it was boring. I wanted to jump from here, but I felt like I didn't even have the strength to do so.
He didn't know how long he was confused before he took out his cell phone and slowly searched the web for the contact information of the mountain school where Chen Bin was studying.
The world is like a huge Colosseum, full of sensual pleasures. Some people are bitten, gnawed and devoured in the Colosseum, while others are hung high in the stands, feeding on the blood of others.
Xu Sirui didn't know whether getting the Colosseum ticket was a blessing or a curse, but if he couldn't change Xu Zhengkang's idea of using others to hype himself up, at least, at the very least -
He hoped that the person who got the ticket was her and not anyone else.
**
There were still many follow-up matters to be arranged regarding the funding, including the date of travel to Beijing and the arrival time of the train tickets, which all needed to be negotiated. During this period, Chen Bin acted as a mouthpiece for Xu Zhengkang and Liu Guifang, frequently visiting their home, so much so that the route to their house had become a muscle memory.
Zhu Yingning has accepted the fact that she has to work no matter what. She's found a joyful way to cope with the difficult times. Once you lower your expectations for the future, your current predicament becomes less unbearable. Initially, she felt downcast when she heard Chen Bin and Zhu Jixiang discuss studying in Beijing. Now, she's managed to remain calm and even smile as she packs Zhu Jixiang's clothes for the trip, urging him to take care of himself and balance work and rest with study.
Everything went smoothly.
Until one day, when Chen Bin came to their house, his expression seemed a little dazed. After finishing his routine conversation with Liu Guifang to wish her good luck, he suddenly said to Liu Guifang, "Sister Liu, our school needs to finish a blackboard newspaper before the start of the semester. I've thought about it and only Yingning can do this job. Can you lend her to me for a while tonight? I promise not to delay her from going to work in town tomorrow."
Liu Guifang was stunned for a moment, then smiled and said, "It's my duty, Teacher! You've helped us so much these days, and I haven't thanked you enough. Feel free to order her around. Don't be polite."
So Chen Bin took Zhu Yingning away and walked on the mountain road to school.
Zhu Yingning never thought that she would have the opportunity to return to school again - although she was just going back to help draw the blackboard newspaper, she was still very excited and followed Chen Bin obediently.
Dusk enveloped the mountains, and the mountain roads were emitting heat from the sun during the day. Perhaps it was about to rain, and the weather was as stuffy as a steamer. Although I felt tired walking on the road, I couldn't sweat.
This feeling was not pleasant, so she fanned her face with her palms. When she was almost at the school, Chen Bin, who was walking in front of her, suddenly turned around and said, "Yingning, if only one of you and your brother could go to the city, who would you let go?"
She didn't understand what he meant: "Teacher Chen, isn't this matter already settled?"
"I mean...what if it's not decided? If you had the freedom to choose, who would you let go?"
"Then of course let Xiangdi go." She answered without hesitation.
"Why?"
"Because I'm the older sister." Zhu Yingning smiled at him, "A sister should give in to her younger brother...Oh, Teacher Chen, we're here." She pointed at the school gate.
The school gate was just around the corner, and Chen Bin led her inside and up the stairs to the teaching building. Zhu Yingning followed behind with ease, and just as she was about to go to the classroom, Chen Bin shook his head and gestured for her to go into the office.
She followed him, originally thinking that Chen Bin wanted to get some new chalk for her from the office, but she saw him pick up the receiver of the landline phone and dial a number with his head down.
Sometimes, people have a strange premonition about things that have not happened.
For example, at this moment, watching Chen Bin making a phone call, she clearly had no idea what was going to happen next, but her heart was beating uncontrollably, her head was dizzy, and her hands and feet were weak.
After the call was connected, Chen Bin said nothing, just waved at her, asking her to come over and answer the phone. She moved her feet clumsily, like Yugong moving a mountain, moving herself to the microphone, and took the heavy microphone with her limp arms.
There was silence on the other end of the phone, no one spoke, so quiet that it seemed as if Chen Bin's action of making a call just now was just her illusion.
But out of an inexplicable intuition, she still opened her mouth and whispered his name: "Xu Sirui?"
He hummed softly on the other end.
Although they had only been together for two or three months, less than a hundred days, and he occupied a very small proportion on the horizontal axis of her life, the moment his voice came, she realized very clearly that this was him.
It is certain and unmistakable.
He didn't engage in lengthy greetings. After a "hmm", he said only two sentences and hung up the phone.
The first sentence is——
"Zhu Yingning, do you still feel unwilling?"
The second sentence is——
"I wish it were you who came."
When the busy tone came from the microphone, she still maintained the posture of holding the microphone with a blank expression.
Later, Zhu Yingning thought that she would remember this day forever.
On a summer night so hot that even sweating was a luxury, when she had almost given up on herself, for the first time in her life, she was chosen.
What kind of person is this? He is a classmate, but we have only been classmates for a few months. He is a friend, but we have been out of touch for hundreds of days.
She thought, maybe he was her benefactor.
His two simple sentences were like Archimedes' fulcrum, which changed her entire life from then on.
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