Chapter 30 - Released from Prison
In April, when the inner courtyard was in full bloom, I was firmly stuck in the Xuanwei Palace.
The ancients said it well: I feel sleepy in spring, tired in autumn, and take naps in summer. After my nerves relax, I become more and more sleepy. I wish I could stay on the couch for twelve hours a day until I sleep through the bed.
Wei Wan'er has been trying hard to recover from the sadness of a broken heart recently, and has turned her attention to flower arranging. She has made many handicrafts such as flower balls and flower baskets. Since she had no place to put them after they were made, she gave one to each of her sisters in the harem. The largest and most gorgeous one was sent to the Zichen Palace. Li Siyan was quite satisfied and gave her a gilded incense burner as a return gift.
This gilded incense burner has the unique magnificence of an imperial artifact. Just by placing it there, a high-profile luster begins to radiate outward.
Wei Wan'er had been in the palace for a short time and had never seen such a good thing. She was very curious about it, so she specially pulled me over to appreciate it together.
I gasped in amazement, "He's so generous to you. This incense burner is truly extraordinary."
"Yeah?"
Wei Wan'er was born out of wedlock and didn't know how to appreciate artifacts, but she vaguely felt that this incense burner was well-made. I told her, "This was made in the kiln of the late emperor, who hired the best craftsmen. This is the style of incense burner that is displayed in the imperial study."
"Is it really that remarkable?" Wei Wan'er curiously picked up the incense burner, looked around, and then set it aside. "But no matter how extraordinary it is, it's just a dead object."
"Oh, right," she said, as if she suddenly remembered something. She brought out a branch of plum blossoms from behind her and placed it next to me. "Dead things are boring. I'll give you a living one. Today is your birthday, right? This vase of plum blossoms is for you. Let's have birthday noodles together tonight."
I was so surprised that I held the bottle in my arms, stammering, "Ah... Thank you. I had forgotten about it. How did you know that?"
She said, "Shangguan Baolin told me that when she was at her mother's house, her eldest sister would come to your birthday party every year on this day."
I hugged the bottle tightly, and was so moved that I almost shed tears: "Why are you so good to me..."
Wei Wan'er smiled and said, "Not very good either."
During dinner, Shangguan Baolin also came to Xuanwei Hall, which was a rare occasion. She gave me a plate of snacks she made herself. She, Wei Wan'er and I had a simple meal of noodles together.
She also brought a little gossip, saying that the new queen Wen Baibi's boudoir suddenly caught fire the day before yesterday for unknown reasons, which scared Minister Wen so much that he almost fainted.
Can this be called a little gossip?
Wei Wan'er and I were both stunned. We put down our chopsticks and asked repeatedly, "What happened? How's Queen Wen? Was she burned by the fire?"
Shangguan Baolin was startled by both of us, especially my overreaction, and stammered, "I... I don't know either. This is what Sister Fang Baolin told me. She just said it was a close call, so I think Queen Wen should be fine..."
I sighed and said, "I'm glad you're okay, but it's unlucky to have a fire in your boudoir before your wedding."
Wei Wan'er also frowned: "...Could it be that someone wants to harm Queen Wen?"
"Not like it," I shook my head. "The position of queen is not that popular." Besides, she is about to enter the palace. Isn't it too late to make a move now?
The three of them got together to analyze the situation for a long time, and finally came to the conclusion: it must have been just an accident.
The topic of Empress Wen ended like this. The three of us wished her well from afar and turned to talk about the history of the Prime Minister's seventh concubine's rise to power...
After seeing Shangguan Baolin off, Wei Wan'er asked me if the coronation ceremony would be postponed given Empress Wen's misfortune. I thought about it carefully and felt it was unlikely. I listed three reasons for her. Reason one: Wen Baibi was a calm person. It was said that she was a goddess who would not blink even if Mount Tai collapsed before her. A small fire would not scare her. Reason two: the auspicious date calculated by the Imperial Astronomical Observatory was calculated with great effort. It would not be worth waiting for a year after missing it. Reason three: Is Li Siyan the kind of person who cares about women's feelings? Obviously, he is not.
"So, the Queen's coronation ceremony shouldn't be postponed." I made my closing statement: "At most, the process will be streamlined."
"Oh..." Wei Wan'er said worriedly, "Never mind, she'll eventually come to the palace..."
Facts have proved that I know Wen Baibi, the Imperial Observatory and Li Siyan too well. Not only was the ceremony of conferring the empress not postponed, but the Ministry of Rites was forced to add a few more rituals. Overall, apart from scaring Minister Wen by the sloppy process, this fire was a waste of time.
And perhaps because they felt it was unlucky, the news of the fire was not spread widely. Very few people in the palace knew about it. If Shangguan Baolin had not mentioned it inadvertently that day, Wei Wan'er and I might still have been kept in the dark.
As the day of Wen Baibi's entry into the palace drew near, Wei Wan'er, clutching her new court dress, timidly inquired about her new boss's personality and preferences: "...I wonder what kind of person she is, and whether she's easy to deal with."
"Her?" I recalled, and Wen Baibi's cold face appeared in front of me.
Actually, I didn't have a deep impression of her. We just played polo together a few times. I remember that she was a very, very beautiful girl, but she didn't like to talk to people.
"She should be a good person, with an even better family background. She's the eldest daughter of the Wen family, her father is the Minister of Chancellery, and her mother is a royal relative. I have several friends who have a crush on her, but she's rather aloof. My friend has written a bunch of love poems, but he didn't dare give her any..."
Wei Wan'er was amazed: "So amazing." Then she started to feel inferior: "No wonder she can become the queen."
"I suddenly remembered something," I sat up straight, "She has some connection with my family. A few years ago, my brother won the third place in the imperial examination and was almost arrested by Minister Wen during a parade to be taken back to marry into the family. My father refused to allow it and insisted that he establish a career first and then start a family, which really pissed off Minister Wen."
"What happened next?" Wei Wan'er asked.
"Later, my brother was killed, and Wen Baibi received the imperial decree to be crowned empress." I held my chin and smiled, saying, "They were not destined to be together."
"I'm sorry." Wei Wan'er apologized quickly.
I sighed. My brother and Wen Baibi seemed to be sitting on the same scale. With a slight push from the dog emperor, my brother suffered a great disaster and fell to the ground. However, Wen Baibi used this power to sit high on the throne of the mother of the country.
It's not that I'm blaming her, I just feel a little powerless. Under the mountain-like imperial power, thunder and rain are all grace from the emperor. Li Siyan can give you life with one hand and death with the other. The fate of everyone in this country is under his control. It's okay when things are calm at ordinary times, but when disaster strikes, you don't even have the strength to fight back.
I was in a very heavy mood. I picked up an orange and peeled it carefully, with a vague worry lingering in my heart.
These days I keep thinking about what happened that night, and Li Siyan's restrained and resolute back. At that time, I just thought that you bastard deserved this day. But after calming down for a few days, I recalled many details one after another. The more I remembered, the stronger the feeling of uneasiness became. I kept asking myself this question - he said he would let me go, but what if he changed his mind?
Having served as the Imperial Attendant for two years, I believe I know Li Siyan quite well. Unlike his brothers who lived a life of luxury, Li Siyan lived in an extremely poor environment when he was young. He had very little and owned very little, so he was extremely persistent in holding on to everything he had, including his kingdom, his power, and his expensive gold and silver wares... He was guarding his bones carefully like a wild dog guarding its food.
He always stressed to me that I should not have any bad intentions and should be his housekeeper wholeheartedly. He even forbade me to have a fiancé. He undoubtedly regarded me as one of the most important people he cared about.
Perhaps there are some tips among the wild dogs on how to choose bone sticks. People like me with a rebellious mind and legs as long as an ostrich are considered to have low-quality bone sticks and should not be accepted. It is best to throw them away as soon as possible to prevent me from getting addicted to them in the future, which would be disastrous.
I am the lowest quality and worst bone stick, but Li Siyan is damned reluctant to throw me away.
Even though what I said that day hit the nail on the head and he lost control and almost tried to kill me, he was not willing to throw this tooth-piercing bone stick of mine into the river. Instead, he found a familiar pit and buried it, and tried to find a new bone stick that would suit his taste better.
He can find the best one, but if other bone sticks don’t suit his taste, will he dig the hole again and bring me back?
Or to put it another way: Would such a fierce, egoistic, and possessive person really let me go at will and never regret it?
A small, rational voice inside me told me: He won't.
If it were any other emperor, he would have cared about his reputation to some extent, but he was Li Siyan, a dog emperor who was not Tang and Wu, despised Zhou and Confucius, and trampled under his feet all rules and creeds. As a thorough pragmatist, reputation really meant nothing to him.
Two years ago, he defeated the group of civil officials represented by his prince brother and was escorted to the throne by military officers and lords. From the first day of his accession to the throne, he offended the group of civil officials of this dynasty. He dared to kill the historians in defiance of the world, so naturally he would also dare to attack me, an orphan historian.
Thinking of this, I was filled with a strong sense of insecurity. It felt like something was stuck in my throat, choking me and making it difficult for me to breathe. I sat there silently, looked up at the beams crisscrossing the Xuanwei Hall, and my hands began to tremble slightly.
Two years ago, I was determined to die and had no hope for the future, so I wasn't afraid of him at all. But now? I see hope that I can stay away from him. Will I still tolerate disappointment?
No, or to be more precise, it cannot.
Human beings are animals that live on hope. Everyone thinks that I am bold and strong, but in fact, I don’t have such a strong will. In my heart, being a servant to the murderer of my father is already a betrayal of the teachings of my ancestors. With every word I write, the guilt is eroding my poor self-esteem. If there is no tiny hope to support me, my faith will collapse sooner or later.
After living like a zombie for two years, I am already completely fed up with this palace. If I have to be trapped in this cage for the rest of my life, I would rather jump off the Qinghui Pavilion than be tortured by quiet despair every day.
My second uncle always taught me: hope for the best, prepare for the worst. I always keep this advice in mind: it would be best if Li Siyan is willing to let me go, but if he regrets it...
"Are you...are you okay?"
Seeing that I didn't speak for a long time, Wei Wan'er noticed my abnormality and asked tentatively.
I hid my shaking hands under the table and forced an awkward smile, saying, "Nothing. I was just thinking about the future and was lost in thought for a moment, so I was just a little dazed."
Wei Wan'er hummed, patted my hand, and said, "Although I don't know what His Majesty will do for you, everything will work out in the end. So relax."
I nodded. In fact, she was right. Things in the world are unpredictable and it is useless to think too much. Even if a disaster really comes that I can't do anything about, I will always be able to meet it with my own troops.
When I was in the Ye Ting, I particularly liked Xia Fugui's little Mi. I often stretched out my claws to grab it, kiss it, hug it and hold it high. Every time, the little Mi kicked me in the face with disgust. In fact, as bystanders of history, we historians are occasionally grabbed by fate, kissed and hugged. I should also learn from the little Mi's cat philosophy of life and give fate a gorgeous cat punch.
The day of the Empress's coronation ceremony was approaching day by day, and the long-silent Inner Court had regained its former bustle. The palace maids carried various things and shuttled between the palaces like flying needles. Qingfu was entrusted with an important task and personally went to the Penglai Palace where the Empress lived to supervise the construction. He stared at the progress of the renovation all day long like a kite on a tree, and his eyes were red from staying up all night. Suxing was in charge of personnel arrangements, and led a group of female officials from the Shanggong Bureau to take charge of the spiritual and civilized construction of the Inner Court.
I met her once by chance. At that time, I was climbing a tree to pick flowers for Wei Wan'er. Su Xing happened to pass by. We looked at each other awkwardly. She glared at me with disgust and left.
I thought to myself, since I entered the palace, so many people's attitudes towards me have changed, but she is the only one who has remained consistent. She thought I was trash on the first day she entered the palace, and she still thinks I am trash now.
Your garbage is about to be sent out of the palace, and I am shouting from afar: Are you happy, Aunt Suxing?
Initially, only the Shanggong Bureau was busy, but as the day of the Empress's coronation approached, even Xiaodie and Ruiyin started to get busy. They were now the head maids of the Xuanwei Palace, and all matters related to Wei Wan'er's attendance at the coronation ceremony were under their management. They were so busy that they could hardly see the end. Even Wei Wan'er was wondering, "I'm just going to join in the fun. Why do I need to prepare so carefully?"
She also pouted and complained to herself: "...No one picked flowers for me."
The image of the plucked-out peach tree at the entrance of Xuanwei Palace appeared before my eyes, and I felt that all the flowering plants in the inner courtyard should line up to kowtow to Wen Baibi.
In this season of lush grass and singing birds, the entire inner courtyard was running at high speed. I was also infected by this busyness and my creative enthusiasm was high. Specifically, during the time I was waiting for Li Siyan to release me, I kept writing and finished writing two legends.
The first book was about a talented scholar and a beautiful woman, which was very cliché. In order to boost sales, I made up a lot of sweet details, such as a scholar picking up a handkerchief for the lady, and the lady and the scholar going up to the roof to watch the stars in the middle of the night. Anyway, I wrote whatever was sour and smelly. Once I started writing these trivialities, I couldn't stop. By the time I wanted to end it, I counted them one by one and found that it was nearly 20,000 words.
Because it was too long to be published, I put it aside. Unexpectedly, the half-written manuscript was accidentally discovered by Ruiyin.
Ruiyin was illiterate and thought I had written something outrageous, so she reported it to Wei Wan'er immediately.
Although Wei Wan'er didn't take it seriously, she couldn't stand Ruiyin's exaggeration, so she called me over and asked me what I was writing. I thought about it and felt that it was okay, so I gave her the manuscript.
Wei Wan'er took the manuscript back to the palace, and I played backgammon with the little palace maid in Xuanwei Palace.
That night, Xiaodie came knocking on my door and complained as soon as she saw me: "What's so good about these Chinese characters?" Her mother read the book three times without even having a midnight snack.
Before she could finish, Wei Wan'er had already hurriedly called me over. The first thing she asked was, "Did Miss Ye San and Du Sheng end up together?"
Ye Sanniang and Du Sheng are the hero and heroine of this legend. I have just written about their vows of eternal love and their preparations to cross the river.
"Of course they're together. Du Sheng won the third place in the imperial examination, so of course Minister Ye would be happy to marry his daughter to him." I scratched my head and said awkwardly, "I just wrote this for fun. Do you like it? If so, I'll write the ending tonight."
Wei Wan'er declined modestly, saying something like there was no rush, but her eyes clearly said two words: Go quickly.
Thus, my legend gained a new regular reader: Ms. Wei Wan'er, the concubine of the Qing Dynasty.
This lady was even more aggressive than Xia Fugui in pushing for my manuscript. Under her encouragement, I quickly finished "Flowers Under the Leaves" and started the next story, tentatively titled "Dreams in the Small Window".
This very sentimental and romantic title came from Wei Wan'er. She strongly suggested that I write a tragic love story, preferably one where you love me and I don't love you.
It can be seen that in the general environment where women's emotions are suppressed, literature about resentful women has a large market.
After reading my latest work, Wei Wan'er was immersed in the sad story, feeling unsatisfied for a long time. After a while, she said, "It's better that they didn't end up together. How can they live in peace when they are separated by national hatred and family feuds? There will always be resentment in their hearts."
I said, "This is called bad fate. It shouldn't have happened, but it did, and it can only end in tragedy."
Wei Wan'er asked, "Is it destined to be incomplete?"
I said seriously, "Absolutely not."
I left these two legends on Wei Wan'er's desk as a souvenir for her, to commemorate our short friendship, and the uneasiness that I have been unable to dispel for the past month. I believe that words are the best carrier for preserving emotions in this era. When I write legends, I am writing my own life through the fate of the characters. Therefore, I do not plan to send these two legends away for publication. Let them stay in the palace, leaving this short period of my life to Wei Wan'er, the last good friend I met in the palace.
Just the day before the ceremony to crown the empress, Qingfu came to Xuanwei Palace to find me and said that after the ceremony was over, I could leave through the corner gate of the Ye Ting. The palace rules prohibited taking any personal belongings out of the palace. Since all my expenses were given by the emperor, all these things had to stay in the palace.
At that moment, the huge rock that had been hanging in my heart for who knows how long finally fell to the ground, and all kinds of sorrow and joy surged into my heart.
I want to cry, I want to wail my heart out, I want to cry out all my worries.
Li Siyan did not regret it, he really wanted to let me go.
After being picked up by fate and kissed all over, my life finally returned to its original track.
I blinked at the sky, slowly calming myself down. Then I smiled and said, "Chen Ying understands. I came here alone, so of course I have to leave cleanly. Grandpa Qingfu, don't worry. I'll leave all his things intact. I'll only take a plum blossom. It was given to me by Concubine Wei Shu, and I'll keep it as a souvenir."
Qingfu put his hands behind his back, looked at me seriously for a long moment, and then said, "It's up to you, but I find it very strange. If I remember correctly, you've been clamoring to leave since the first day you came to the palace. Now that your long-cherished wish has come true, you don't seem very happy."
"That's not surprising. Your beloved Majesty told me on the Shangsi Festival that he might release me one day." I said frankly, "I've long guessed this would happen. Think about it, what day could be more meaningful than him marrying the Queen?"
Qingfu didn't comment, but simply said, "Congratulations."
I suddenly thought of something and pulled him aside, saying, "Wait a moment." I turned around and ran back to the room, took out a small sachet, and handed it to Qingfu, saying, "This is for Grandpa Qingfu."
He was stunned. There were so many people who gave gifts to Yang Da Zong Guan, but he probably never expected that he would receive a gift from me.
I used to call him an old thing and a dead eunuch, and he also called me ungrateful and stupid as a pig. Logically speaking, we should be enemies.
But he once saved me from the furious Li Siyan and defended Little Jinlian and Little Jinliu. I gradually discovered that this sarcastic old eunuch wasn't as annoying as I'd imagined, and he even had a bit of humor...
"I sewed this. It's not very pretty, but it works. It repels snakes and insects." I said, "I was sick that day and angered His Majesty. Grandpa Qingfu saved my life. I've always remembered it. This is a small token of my appreciation. Please accept it."
Qingfu took it silently, squeezed it, put it in his sleeve, and then said, "If you had grown up earlier, you wouldn't have suffered so much."
He paused, then continued, "Leave the palace and don't stay in Chang'an. Go as far away as possible, the farther the better, so that His Majesty won't find you."
I wondered, “Why?”
He sighed, "I've been scheming in the palace all my life, and I've met at least eight thousand people. Listen to me, I won't cheat you."
I didn't take it seriously, thinking that you've complained about me many times before, but I still said obediently, "Chen Ying has made a note of it."
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