Chapter 45 Some Daily Life
My friend Jiang Yushi once taught me: What a man says when he is infatuated with love can be treated as a fart.
When Li Siyan said he could give me the kingdom, I turned my back to him and rolled my eyes: This is what a man is, he talks big about the kingdom as a betrothal gift without hesitation, but he never lets me stroll around in his kingdom.
Li Siyan was particularly clingy today. During dinner, he even commented on the Hu Bing I made for him during the day. However, he is not the kind of person who likes to eat fine food, so of course he couldn't explain the secret. He could only say two concise words: it's unpalatable.
I banged the table angrily and said, "This is the taste of the cakes I make. If you want something better, ask your concubines to make it for you."
Li Siyan was not displeased by my cold shoulder, but even raised his eyebrows and laughed out loud.
"You're still laughing!" I was so angry.
He stopped smiling, put a piece of roasted meat into my small golden bowl with his chopsticks and said, "Although it tastes bad, I like it very much."
It’s hard to put it into words. I shut up and lowered my head to eat. I felt that the palace people’s eyes were looking at me more and more subtle and ambiguous.
Especially Xiao Jinlian, damn, the way this girl tried hard to hold back her smile looked just like my aunt who loved to act as a matchmaker.
After clearing the dishes, I lazily leaned against the head of the bed and read a book. I finished reading the Natural History yesterday and switched to In Search of the Gods today.
Li Siyan had no official business to attend to tonight, so he leaned against me and read a book. I glanced at it without much interest: Romance of the Three Kingdoms.
As I was reading, I felt a sweet taste in my mouth, and Li Siyan stuffed a candied fruit into my mouth.
I turned my head with the candied fruit in my mouth. Li Siyan crossed his long legs, changed into a comfortable position and said, "This plum is well made."
I chewed it and it tasted really good. After all, the chef was chosen by the emperor himself, so his cooking skills were impeccable.
Recently he has shown great interest in feeding me. Every day he finds different ways to stuff me with all kinds of delicacies, snacks and candied fruits, as if he can't wait to fatten me up and sell me out.
...Well, just feed me. I'm no longer afraid of boiling water anyway.
The two of us sat opposite each other reading in silence, each of us lighting a green-glazed lamp.
It was a royal luxury, with more than a dozen candles on the lamp, making the room as bright as day.
Not long after, I got tired of watching, yawned, and said to Li Siyan, "Your Majesty, I'm sleepy."
He looked up at me, put down his book, stood up, walked over to me and said, "Want to rest?"
I stretched my limbs like a raccoon and said lazily, "Let Jinlian and Jinliu help me untie my hair first."
Ever since I recovered from my illness, I lost the privilege of having disheveled hair. Huiyue would comb my hair into a neat double spiral style every day without fail.
I don't like this hairstyle very much. It always hurts my scalp when it's pulled, but Li Siyan seems to like the look of me with a pair of horns. He likes to pull them whenever he has nothing to do. It's very childish and always reminds me of the little boy sitting behind me who used to harass me when I was a child.
As I was daydreaming, a hand gently fell on my hair bun, first rubbed it, and then pulled out the silk ribbon that tied my hair.
Without the restraint of the belt, my black hair hung down. I turned my head and looked at Li Siyan in confusion, wondering why he suddenly felt so uncomfortable.
The latter was extremely thick-skinned and said frankly: "It's just a hair removal. I can help you."
He came around behind me and asked me, "Where is your comb?"
My eyes widened in shock, nearly falling off the bed. I clutched my hair and stammered, "...Your Majesty, are you going to give me a haircut?"
He said as a matter of course: "Why not? Come here."
The palace door opened slightly, and Huiyue, who had been waiting outside the door, handed over a small rhinoceros horn comb with great tact, and then quickly left the inner hall with even greater tact.
I had a messy head of hair and was pressed firmly in front of the dressing table by the dog emperor on a whim. There were only two words in my heart that I kept shouting: Help.
According to the customs of the time, tying up hair was a very serious matter and was closely related to the etiquette and legal system. Therefore, only the closest people could comb each other's hair and wash their faces.
Li Siyan held a rhino horn comb in his hand, picked up a bunch of tangled hair and started to comb it. It was probably his first time to help someone comb their hair, so he didn't use much strength. I felt my scalp tighten, and then I cried out in pain.
It hurt so much that I looked at the helpless dog emperor in the mirror with tears in my eyes and said through gritted teeth: "I can do it myself!"
Li Siyan was in the wrong but he stood up straight and said firmly, "Don't move." He tried to untie the hair again.
I could only sit there obediently and let him do what he wanted.
In front of me is a tall dressing table, made of fine ebony and inlaid with various precious gems. It is said to be a treasure shipped from the Western Regions. This gorgeous dressing mirror should reflect the most beautiful woman in the country, but at this moment, the person sitting in front of it is an ordinary me, who is only a little good-looking.
I knew from a young age that I was not a great beauty. In the beauty pageant within Anyifang, I could barely make it into the top three. In the entire Chang'an, I could only make it into the top 50 at best.
If someone had told me a few years ago that I would be able to make the emperor completely infatuated with me in the future, I would have sent that person to a hysterical hospital and persuaded him to get treatment first. This matter could not be delayed.
Looking at the handsome, stubborn, and slightly haggard face in the bronze mirror, and then looking at the emperor who was concentrating on combing my hair, I felt that God was really humorous. He gave Li Siyan a handsome face, but did not give him a pair of eyes with normal aesthetic sense.
I opened my mouth, hesitated several times, and finally asked, "...Why does it have to be me?"
"I have a bad temper, my Hu pancakes are terrible, and I'm just plain-looking..." I listed my shortcomings. "My family is dwindling, and I have a childhood sweetheart... Anyway, Your Majesty, you are the ruler of the world. What woman can't you want? Why do you have to pester me... Ah!"
It turned out that Li Siyan couldn't untie those strands of hair, so he simply pulled them apart. However, he didn't control the strength of the pulling, which caused a severe pain in my scalp.
He pinched the strands of broken hair, tied them into a knot seemingly unintentionally, and put them into a small sachet. After doing this, he picked up the comb and combed my still relatively smooth hair from time to time.
He still didn't answer my question, but said noncommittally, "There's no reason, I just like it."
"You scholars always come up with so many items for no reason, meticulously analyzing each one, as if every problem must have an answer." Li Siyan said calmly, "But most things in the world are unreasonable."
I pressed him, "Is it because my personality suits your taste? Do you just want to control a fiery bird?"
Li Siyan bent his finger and flicked my forehead: "Not entirely, the most important thing is that I like you as a person."
I like you.
──If someone else confessed their feelings to me like this, I would definitely be secretly happy and self-indulgent, but when Li Siyan said this, it just made me feel that this bastard was trying to fool me again.
He stroked my fair face, straightened my head, and said to the bronze mirror, "Besides, you are also quite pretty. If you were to compare yourself to a bird, you would be considered a sparrow with beautiful feathers."
I carefully looked at the ordinary face in the bronze mirror again, and once again became convinced that Li Siyan's aesthetic taste was more or less flawed.
He inserted his fingers into my tresses, gently running them downwards, and whispered, "What shampoo do you use? It smells different than before. It smells delicious."
"Soap beans and Huiyue's frankincense." I replied.
He responded vaguely, lowered his head and kissed my hair, then touched my neck and back, leaving a series of soft noises.
His expression was so nostalgic and obsessed that it gave me a chill for no reason.
I was afraid of this excessive intimacy. His posture was like a beast sniffing out stored food, ready to pounce at any time.
To avoid his ever-present bark, I quickly shrank to the side and deliberately changed the subject: "Your Majesty, why are you suddenly so nice to me today? I'm not used to it."
Li Siyan still said the same thing: "I am happy with it."
That night he fell asleep with his arms around me, his posture domineering and possessive, like a child hugging a human-shaped comfort toy.
The sun in the north is scorching hot during the day, but at night, a breeze blows from Taiye Lake, blowing away the heat wave in the capital.
Although it was a bit cold, I didn't need to cover myself with a blanket. Li Siyan exercises regularly and has a night heating function. When he hugged me, I felt like a huge stove was burning behind me.
I kicked him without hesitation: "...It's so hot, stay away from me."
He raised his eyelids and looked at me. His arm across my chest moved slightly. After staying there for a while, he reluctantly moved away.
I continued, "Move over here. I'm running out of room to sleep."
He obediently moved outside.
I was finally satisfied and closed my eyes while hugging the quilt.
Li Siyan is a person with an unpredictable personality. He acts crazy and paranoid, but deep down he seems to have a masochistic tendency.
When I was first arrested, I was worried about my relatives and friends. I was panicked and scared all day long and didn't know how to deal with him. There were times when I tried to please him, and there were times when I was so disheartened that I didn't bother to pay any attention. When he saw me like this, he became extremely angry and said a lot of unpleasant things, which scared me to the point of being in a state of panic all day long.
Now I have changed my strategy. I give him the same cold shoulder and throw a tantrum as I did to Meng Xu, and let him eat and play as he pleased. Instead, he enjoys it very much. He no longer has a stern face and no longer threatens me in a sarcastic tone.
Although I haven't figured out the source of his mentality, I'm very happy that I have found a way to keep him in a good mood. When he is in a good mood, he will not cause trouble for the Shen and Meng families again, and I can also breathe a sigh of relief.
In the dark night, I lay on my side, thinking about how to make the most of it and trick him into giving me a new room.
──It’s better to stay away from the Purple Palace so that you don’t have to see him every day.
Just when he was dreaming, a shadow suddenly fell over his head, blocking the faint halo of the night pearl.
Before I could even pretend to be asleep, Li Siyan caught me red-handed. He sat up, propped his chin up with his hand, and said with a smile, "Just now you said you wanted to sleep, but when you got to the bed you weren't sleepy anymore. Your eyes are wide open, what are you thinking about?"
I had already made up an excuse and started talking: "Thinking about the Hu pancakes I made this morning, if I had cooked them for half a cup of tea longer, they would have tasted better."
"Oh?" Li Siyan said, "The manager said you left right after you finished making it, without even trying a single bite. How can you tell what it tastes like?"
This person is really annoying because he keeps asking questions.
I snorted and said, "I knew it when it came out of the pan. The color looked different from ordinary Hu pancakes. Otherwise, how could I give it all to you?"
Li Siyan laughed.
Smiling, he said softly, "I'll forgive you this time, but you must do better next time."
I nodded.
He reached out and closed my eyes. His voice came from the darkness: "...You said last night that you couldn't forget the past. If you can't forget it, then forget it. As long as everything is like today, you can make demands on me, lose your temper with me, and do anything except leave me."
He had said similar things over and over again many times, but this time he was particularly solemn and humble, almost like a request.
I wasn't in the mood, so I nodded in the dark as a response.
……etc!
Suddenly, an idea flashed through my mind. I sat up abruptly and went up to Li Siyan and said, "You said you can do anything? Really?"
He said, "It's not true that everything is possible. Let me hear it."
"Could you please not take advantage of me?"
"Give me a reason," Li Siyan said without comment.
"I've endured countless spitting attacks just to get you back. Now I'm not going to touch you anymore, is that right?"
I said, "There are many reasons. Doctor Fan also said that day that I have suffered many serious illnesses in the past six months, and I was even stabbed in the face in front of the emperor. The series of injuries has seriously weakened my body and I can't stand the torture."
"And..." I dragged out a long, aggrieved tone, speaking pitifully, "I can't get over it in my heart, and I'm not ready... If my father were still alive, he'd curse me in my dreams if he saw me so easily committing myself to the man who killed him."
Li Siyan said, "Then when he comes to you in your dream, explain to him clearly that I forced you to serve me, and you were forced into this situation. You are completely innocent."
"I...my dad doesn't care. He'll just think I'm spineless."
"Don't be afraid, I'll be scolded along with you." Li Siyan has the nerve to stand up to twice as thick as me.
I cursed him inwardly for being so lustful and having no sympathy at all, but I still said, "Oh, Your Majesty, just allow me. I will be Your Majesty sooner or later anyway, so you don't mind waiting until I feel better, right?"
He pondered for a moment, then reached out and combed my long hair with his long, beautiful fingers.
After a silence of about half a cup of tea, he gathered all my hair behind the pillow and said, "Since your body is in bad shape, you should fix it first. However, I have a short patience, so please don't make me wait too long."
Finally putting this matter off for a bit, I breathed a sigh of relief: "Thank you, Your Majesty."
Later, Li Siyan ordered the withdrawal of the extra guards and never mentioned asking me to serve him in bed again.
But other than that, everything remains the same. My living standard is still that of an empress dowager. As long as I ask for something, Li Siyan will never say no.
One day, I had a sudden urge to ask him to use the imperial seal to stamp my painting. It was just a casual suggestion, but I didn't expect him to hand it to me without hesitation and even asked me if I wanted to play with his private seal.
He said it lightly, but I was so scared that I almost fell off the table - the emperor's private seal is so important. Even Li Siyan needs to personally stamp it when issuing imperial edicts and proclamations. He lets me play with it so casually. Isn't he afraid that I will have bad intentions?
Li Siyan said calmly, "You don't even have the courage to kill me, so why should I be worried?"
I said indignantly: "It's because you are the emperor."
"Yes, this is the advantage of being an emperor," Li Siyan pinched my cheek and said with a smile, "Only by standing above everyone else can you control what you want for a long time."
His smile was so annoying that at that moment, I really wanted to hire a good assassin to kill him.
As the days passed, the new life pattern slowly became fixed: in the morning he went to court while I took a nap, in the afternoon he worked while I strolled around, after 3 p.m. he put down his pen and went home, and at night he held me in his arms to sleep.
He allowed me to leave the Purple Palace, but forbade me to go north of the Imperial Street, especially to visit other palaces.
I live alone in the Purple Palace. Every day when I wake up and see the magnificent palace, I feel like I am in a luxurious and lonely cocoon.
Li Siyan didn't like to see my sad face, so he asked Huiyue to select a group of young palace maids to accompany me. Two days later, he also sent Yide, who had received emergency training, to serve me.
Yide never thought that he would have such great luck. He was completely dazed when he arrived. It was only after Xiao Jinlian took him around the inner hall twice that he calmed down a little.
"Why did Madam Shen choose me?" After serving me the meal, Yide found a gap and asked timidly.
I rubbed his head and said, "You look a lot like my brother, but you're a bit more obedient than him."
Then he said, "I want to see him later, you come too."
Yes, Li Siyan finally fulfilled his promise and called Xiaochuan into the palace.
The meeting place was arranged in a side hall outside the Purple Palace. As soon as I entered, I saw many strong and powerful guards tightly surrounding the frail Xiaochuan. When the latter saw me, he blinked hard to prevent tears from falling, and whispered to me, "Sister."
"Stinky boy," I said, "is your hand okay?"
"Okay." Ogawa replied.
I was still worried, so I asked him to write a few words for me to see. Sure enough, the pen strokes were much softer, and it seemed that the injury on the little finger bone had not healed completely.
"The imperial physician comes to see me every day, and he says there's nothing wrong with me." Ogawa glanced at my gloomy face and added.
I slowly exhaled, trying to appear relaxed and kind. "...How's Auntie? Is everything okay at home?"
"Very good," Xiaochuan said, "The emperor has come to give gifts several times."
"What about you? Did any of your classmates bully you at the Imperial College?"
After this question, Xiaochuan finally showed a little bit of relief: "Who dares to bully me? They are too busy trying to curry favor with me."
I made a gesture as if I wanted to hear more.
Xiao Chuan smiled bitterly and said, "How could a bunch of mediocre people know that we are helpless? They all think that my sister has been greatly favored and will lead the entire Shen family to ascend to heaven."
He said, "The atmosphere of the Imperial College of putting down the weak and praising the strong is too unbearable. Sister, I think..."
I said firmly, "Chen Chuan, if you dare to drop out of school without permission, I will beat your ass!"
He was surprised: "How do you know..."
"Listen here," I grabbed his shoulders, my eyes as calm as water. "I don't expect you to become an official, but you can't give up your craft as a historian. You can even become a scholar or a compiler, but there's only one rule: you can't drop out of school."
"Can……"
"I'm telling you, Chen Chuan, I'm not going to sacrifice the rest of my life for you to mess around! Don't even think about shirking any of the responsibilities you should bear, or I'll have plenty of ways to deal with you!"
Ogawa wanted to refute, but seeing that I was serious for once, he couldn't bear to refuse me and nodded in agreement.
"Okay, don't be so downhearted. I'm doing pretty well," I said, showing him the large gold chain I'd specially worn around my neck, along with the soft, cool silk dress I was wearing. "The emperor likes me very much. He sends me all sorts of goodies and doesn't force me to do anything."
"Besides," I leaned close to his ear and said in a voice only the two of us could hear, "The situation is so pressing that I have to give in. But if I have the chance in the future, I will still find a way out."
"Sister, you are worthy of being me." Xiaochuan was very pleased, and his eyes brightened up.
That’s right, I, his sister, am a troublemaker who insists on making trouble even if I’m in the gutter.
Where there is oppression, there is resistance. The fight with Li Siyan will be a protracted tug-of-war, and I will never give up easily.
After seeing my brother off, I returned to the Purple Palace with a pair of gold coins and a sense of satisfaction.
If you want to do something, you have to recruit people first. I started to take stock of the personal connections I had.
The existing resources are very pitiful, one pair of gold and one pair of Yide... One of the pair of golds listens to Huiyue more than me, and is of little use.
If I were to move to another palace in the future, these three would probably be my initial personal staff. According to the general promotion path for palace servants, they would become the chief steward and the head maid in the future...
The future chief palace maid and chief steward were still three ignorant bean sprouts at this time.
Looking at the confused looks of the three of them, I wiped my face hard and decided that I could not let them grow up wildly anymore.
But I didn't know how to train them, so I adopted the method I was most familiar with - I started with a private lecture and taught them a few words.
In that era, knowing how to read was a rare thing, and the three of them were ecstatic to have this opportunity.
Little Jinlian choked up with emotion and said, "Jinlian is blessed by the merits of her past life to be able to follow my wife. I will definitely sacrifice my life to repay my wife's kindness!"
Yide's eyes turned red and he secretly clenched his fists, as if he had made up his mind.
I sighed in my heart. These are the kind-hearted children who grew up in hardship. They would be grateful if someone gave them a hand. Unlike those dandies in Chang'an, they would never be satisfied no matter how much support their elders gave them.
Upon learning that I was going to give a lecture, Hui Yue specifically asked Li Siyan for permission. A moment later, Hu Yueer, sweating profusely, directed several young eunuchs to carry over several heavy sand tables. Panting, he said, "His Majesty has instructed us to prepare all the teaching aids. These are the sand boards and rulers used by Shangguan Taifu back then. If you need anything else, just let me know."
Shang...Teacher Shangguan?
I was shocked: "Xiaolan's grandfather used it? I don't want it! Give me a new one!"
Hu Yue'er was stunned, his eyes filled with despair. Only then did I notice the sweat on his forehead. I felt pity for him and said in frustration, "Forget it, this is it."
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