alienation
"You said Xiao Xue was deliberately distancing herself from you?" Chen Xiyu pondered while eating pasta. "Could it be that Xiao Xue has been very busy lately? Have you guys contacted each other?"
Xie Yanzhi shook his head. "Ever since we separated after the last drama, Xiao Xue told me on WeChat that she couldn't reciprocate my feelings and wasn't worthy of my kindness. I asked her for an explanation, but she blocked me. Last night, I went to her house and waited all night."
Xie Yanzhi twitched his lips and laughed self-deprecatingly, "She didn't come out either, and didn't even give an explanation."
"I was dumped before we even got together."
Chen Xiyu was quite shocked and almost choked. Xie Yanzhi was sad but still pushed the Coke to her to help her feel better.
"So you didn't sleep all night last night? Xiao Xue isn't that kind of person. When I was in junior high school, I felt like she was a bit of a loner, quiet, sensitive, and thoughtful. To be honest, if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't have associated your two personalities together."
Chen Xiyu stared at Xie Yanzhi's eyes carefully, "He does have such deep dark circles."
Xie Yanzhi turned his head away: "I asked you to listen to my cold heart, why are you observing my dark circles?"
Chen Xiyu: "Then you have to tell me the whole story. I don't know how you two got together. The first time I saw you two walking together was at the sports meet, and I didn't even think that figure from behind was Xiao Xue."
Xie Yanzhi's awkward young master spirit came back, and he looked around, "Do we have to talk here... These are all my father's men..."
Chen Xiyu glared at him. "I went out with you early in the morning, stayed awake, and didn't even have breakfast. We spent the entire afternoon in the billiard hall and coffee shop. Xie Yanzi, you didn't tell me, did you? I'm not going to listen."
Xie Yanzhi: "I just feel that the environment here is not suitable for talking about my troubles. I know there's a Qing bar on this street. It opens at 2 o'clock, and it's probably about time for dinner. I think the environment there is suitable for someone like me who has been heartbroken..." After saying this, as if he was afraid that Chen Xiyu would disagree, he glanced at Chen Xiyu who was drinking Coke angrily, "Is this okay, Sister Xiyu?"
Hearing the unexpected name, Chen Xiyu couldn't help but hold her forehead and laugh, "Oh, how can I be so worthy to hear Master Xie call me Sister Xiyu again? It's been a long time since I last heard such a name. Okay, okay, I'll do as you say."
"The last time you called me was when you asked me for something in junior high. Hey, Xie Yanzhi, do you remember the first time we met as kids? Back then, your family wasn't as rich as they are now, and you had just moved downstairs from us. We weren't close, and I only saw you a few times. Back then, I thought you were really cocky and aloof, but after that, we got to know each other better, and you just obediently called me 'Sister Xiyu' when we met."
Xie Yanzhi couldn't help laughing, "Of course I remember. Back then, Old Xie and my grandfather had a huge fight because of different philosophies. My dad refused to admit defeat and decided to go out on his own. The two of them went out to run business during the day, which made me suffer. I ate the food my mom prepared in the living room, and one time I accidentally knocked it over. I went hungry for a few days and could only drink cold water and eat instant noodles to fill my stomach. When we were playing in the park downstairs, you had a delicious egg tart in your hand, and I couldn't help but take a bite. Then we started fighting. You pulled my hair and I stepped on your foot."
Chen Xiyu: "Then my mom found out and dragged me to your house. You were the only one there. My mom was heartbroken. You were such a small child, guarding the house by yourself, and I brought you all these delicious treats."
Xie Yanzhi: "When Old Xie and the others came back, they took me to your house to apologize. My mom asked me to call you 'Sister Xiyu'. It's true that fighting is the beginning of friendship. That's when I started to feel a sense of closeness with you. I'm the only son in our family, but I feel like you're especially like my sister."
Chen Xiyu: “…”
"Please, I'm older than you, okay? Call me 'Sister Xiyu' again."
"Only one month older."
"That's also my sister, okay?"
"I still remember when my mom found out you were often the only three or four-year-old at home, she immediately and enthusiastically told Auntie Deng that she could take you in and look after you during the day, saying it was okay to look after one child or two. I was young at the time, and I thought, this cocky boy is just a little handsome, does he really want to play with me every day? I'd even be fine with him being my friend, even if it was just a reluctant gesture. How could I convince myself otherwise?"
Xie Yanzhi's eyes curved, "Great, so you were thinking about this. I was quite happy at the time because I thought your home was very warm. Every time you played in the park downstairs, the food you brought was so delicious. Later, we went to the same kindergarten, elementary school, junior high school, and high school together. The older I get, the more I realize that although my childhood sweetheart is a little silly, she is very loyal and easy to get along with."
"What a pity, Master Xie is a real master. You lived in our neighborhood back then as a transitional family. I remember Uncle Xie became successful in his business after a few years, so your family moved out. But our family, Old Chen, worked diligently and has lived in this neighborhood ever since. I also want to be a little princess."
Xie Yanzhi smiled and said, "Why, it's your turn to stay at the villa for two days? Anyway, I think Old Chen and Old Deng like you more because you're the happy person. You always seem so happy when you come to our house. Can I go and be Uncle Chen and his son for a few days?"
Chen Xiyu smiled cunningly, "Just be my son for two days."
Xie Yanzhi pretended to hit Chen Xiyu, "Go to hell."
Later, the two of them went to the bar called "Buwang" that Xie Yanzhi mentioned and found a seat to sit down.
Bartender: "What would you like?"
Chen Xiyu was still looking at the wine list. "Do you have any recommendations for low-alcohol wines?"
"We're already in the bar, why would you want to drink a drink? Just order the most popular one, the price is negotiable." Xie Yanzhi waved his hand arrogantly.
Chen Xiyu glared at him: "Why didn't you say that you, Master Xie, would pay for all the expenses tonight?"
The bartender was young, probably in his twenties. "Is this your first time here? You can try the fruit wine. It's a little strong, but you won't get drunk."
Chen Xiyu was afraid that Xie Yanzhi would cause trouble, so she quickly agreed before he could speak and handed the wine list to the bartender.
Two glasses of beautiful fruit wine were brought up. "Hello, here are your mint Qinghe and mulberry coconut milk. Please enjoy."
Chen Xiyu took a bite and said, "It tastes okay."
The resident singer in the bar came and sang beautiful love songs, which created a great atmosphere.
Xie Yanzhi suddenly said, "Chen Yu, do you have her WeChat?"
Chen Xiyu didn't react for a moment and exclaimed, "Ah!"
"Who's WeChat?" I realized belatedly who it might be.
"Xiao Xue?"
Xie Yanzhi's hand holding the wine glass trembled a little, and he said in a low, almost inaudible voice, "Hmm."
"I added her WeChat a long time ago, what's wrong?"
Xie Yanzhi: "Call her and ask her to come out."
Chen Xiyu hesitated, but couldn't bear to see her childhood friend looking depressed, so she found Xiao Xue and called her on WeChat.
The phone beeped a few times before it was finally connected.
"Hello?"
"It's me, Xiaoxue, Chen Xiyu."
"I know, what's wrong, Xiyu?"
Chen Xiyu glanced at Xie Yanzhi who was guzzling wine and raised her hand to stop him, "Hey, hey, hey, you can't drink fruit wine like that!"
Chen Xiyu responded: "Xiaoxue, I'm at a bar on Nanhe Road right now. It's convenient for you now. Xie Yanzhi is drunk and I can't carry him away by myself."
Chen Xiyu thought of a reason.
"I" Xiao Xue hesitated.
"Please, Xiao Xue, you know this guy Xie Yanzhi. If he really makes you unhappy, come over and we can scold him together. We should talk things over properly, right? I'll send you the address."
Xiao Xue finally agreed, "Yeah."
After hanging up the phone, Chen Xiyu looked at Xie Yanzhi and said, "Alright, she'll be here soon. Drink less."
When Xiao Xue arrived at the store according to the location and saw Xie Yanzhi safe and sound, she realized that Chen Xiyu was lying to her. In fact, she had already guessed most of the answer in her mind.
Chen Xiyu: "I'm sorry, Xiao Xue, I shouldn't have lied to you. But since you're here, you two should have a good chat. I should avoid the issue."
Xiao Xue didn't look at the boy in front of her who was holding the wine glass and not saying a word. Xie Yanzhi, on the other hand, kept looking at her, his eyes straight and without any reservation.
Xiao Xue: "No, I also want to find a chance to make it clear before I leave."
Xie Yan was stunned, "What do you mean?"
Xiao Xue: "I'm sorry, Xie Yanzhi, I've been lying to you all along."
Sad love songs were being sung in the bar.
"Xiyu asked me when I called, 'Did you bully me?' Actually, it was me who was bullying you all the time." Xiao Xue lowered her head, not daring to look into Xie Yanzhi's eyes.
"From the beginning to the end, I have been deliberately getting close to you."
"Why?" Xie Yanzhi seemed to have thought of something. "Yue Yutong, it has something to do with you, right? Is everything she said true?"
Chen Xiyu, who was standing by, was confused. How did this get back to the little princess who liked Xie Yanzhi a few years ago?
Xiao Xue nodded, "She is my sister."
Xie Yanzhi didn't say anything, and Chen Xiyu didn't expect it either.
Xiao Xue: "When I was five years old, I thought my family was very happy, until my father brought home a girl about my age and told me, Xiaoxue, this is your sister. At that time, my mother was so angry that she divorced and took me to live with my grandmother in the countryside. But from then on, my mother became depressed and sick, and left me when I was in junior high school. It was also around that time that I was taken to Yue Yutong's junior high school in Tongcheng City. At that time, she and many people called me a country bumpkin, so I later transferred to F Affiliated Middle School."
"Whenever I saw their happy family, I always felt like an outsider who didn't fit in. Later, I found out that when I was five years old, it was Yue Yutong's mother who kept asking my father to give her a legitimate status. I hated my father, Yue Yutong's mother, and Yue Yutong who always bullied me."
"Later, Yue Yutong also attended F High School. I thought I would once again fall into the shadow of her oppression until she confessed her love to you, Xie Yanzhi."
"You rejected her harshly, without giving her any face. I still remember Yue Yutong crying as she went home to ask for a transfer. She transferred to No. 1 Middle School. At that time, I wondered what it would be like if the man she loved but couldn't have liked me, so I deliberately approached you. From then on, whether it was holding an umbrella for you on rainy days, smoking in a corner you would pass by, or deliberately getting close to other boys to provoke you, these were all my ways of deliberately attracting you."
Xiao Xue looked straight at Xie Yanzhi, and seeing his bloodshot eyes, Xiao Xue turned her head away with a cruel heart.
"So, can you understand? I'm not good, nor am I caring. I'm broken inside. Aside from my mom and grandma, I've never been loved, and I don't know how to love anyone. I want to separate from you."
After a long moment, no one spoke. Xie Yanzhi's voice trembled as he asked, "I'll just say, why did you choose to tell me this?"
He prayed that she would be sincere to him, even for a little bit.
"Because Yue Yutong found the Polaroid we took, she's extremely jealous. I've achieved my goal, and there's no reason for me to play with you anymore."
Xiao Xue's words, every word, shattered the little bit of hope in his heart.
"Xie Yanzhi, are you so mean? You obviously knew all this a long time ago, didn't Yue Yutong already look for you?"
Xie Yanzhi understood, closed his eyes and tried his best to endure something: "Shut up!"
Xiao Xue: "I'm going abroad next year."
Xie Yanzhi opened his eyes, and there was an extremely cold and dead look in his eyes.
"you……"
"What qualifications do you have to use me and play with my feelings?"
"Don't let me see you again, or I will kill you, Xiao Xue."
Later, Xiao Xue left in the second semester of her sophomore year. She applied for the international dance program. Chen Xiyu only knew that she went to the UK, but she never dared to tell Xie Yanzhi about this.
Xie Yanzhi's life returned to normal, but he no longer ran around during breaks. He often sat quietly in the classroom and daydreamed.
Chen Xiyu took it to heart.
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