responsibility
When Xia Zhitang came to Teacher Ye's house again, he felt a little complicated.
She subconsciously touched her belly, where a small bean sprout had taken root in her body.
If she decided to keep the little sprout, she would be a mother in ten months.
Teacher Ye looked a little more haggard than the last time I saw her, but her eyes and brows were gentler.
"Little Bean, you're awesome." She held a maraca, teasing the baby who was practicing lifting his head. "Come on, hold on a little longer."
The little baby waited with his big round eyes and tried hard to hold on for a while, then he fell down with a "plop".
"Don't worry, mom will help you turn over." Teacher Ye came over and helped the baby turn over.
After a while, the baby, who had fully discharged his energy, began to cry loudly.
Teacher Ye was holding the baby who was fussy and didn't want anyone but his mother, and she was humming a song while spinning around in the living room and doing the carrot squat.
Xia Zhitang looked at the dark circles under Teacher Ye's eyes and was a little unsure whether she could fulfill her responsibilities as a mother.
After finally coaxing the baby to sleep, Teacher Ye carefully handed the child over to the aunt to continue holding.
She then tiptoed to the next room to be interviewed.
"Teacher Ye, why do you have to hold the child while sleeping?" Xia Zhitang subconsciously touched her belly and asked in confusion.
"Because Xiaodouzi falls to the ground and wakes up during the day, and babies at this stage need enough sleep to develop well, so we take turns holding her to sleep during the day." Teacher Ye had a loving smile on her face.
"What causes someone to wake up after falling to the ground?" Although Xia Zhitang had discussed a pre-pregnancy checkup with Gu Zian, she had never thought of having a baby so soon.
"Babies are generally difficult to care for after the confinement period, probably due to various growth and development reasons." Teacher Ye has obviously done a lot of research on this aspect. "Human babies really work hard to grow. They cry when they are sleepy and haven't learned to fall asleep yet. They cry because of abdominal pain due to development. They also cry because they suddenly came out of their mother's womb and haven't adapted to the outside world and feel uncomfortable."
Xia Zhitang felt that Teacher Ye’s current state made her very confused. He was talking about very tiring and difficult things, but he had a different kind of vitality.
Xia Zhitang asked consciously: "Teacher Ye, do you think you are happy now?"
Teacher Ye answered without hesitation: "Happiness. She is the continuation of my life. I feel the magic of life from her."
Then she changed the subject: "But I also feel very tired and very hard."
"Happiness is real, and pain is also real." Xia Zhitang summed up Teacher Ye's words.
"Yes, I love her very much, but I also hope to get a full night's sleep." Teacher Ye gently pressed her fingertips under her eyes. "I don't even dare to look in the mirror now. I feel like a panda."
Xia Zhitang is currently unable to understand this complex emotion. All the information can be summarized as: raising offspring is not easy.
“Is there a solution?”
Teacher Ye shook her head. "We can only wait until the child grows up, learns to fall asleep on his own, and adapts to the outside world."
"If you were given another chance to choose, would you still choose to have children?" Xia Zhitang is now standing at the crossroads of life, feeling lost.
"Yes, but I might save more money." Teacher Ye never regretted having children. She just felt that if she prepared more material conditions in advance, her life might be easier.
After coming out of Teacher Ye's house, Xia Zhitang gently touched her belly.
"Don't rush to make a decision." Lin Jingming knew what she was thinking at a glance. "I've checked the information. We can still delay it for a while. If you really don't want it, I'll take you back to Taipei for surgery."
He glanced at Xia Zhitang's slightly hesitant expression and continued, "Of course, I'm not suggesting not doing it. I just think, it's just one child. Not to mention Gu Zian, even with your financial resources and me as his godfather, raising him will definitely be easier than Teacher Ye."
Lin Jingming carefully analyzed the pros and cons of these two paths with Xia Zhitang: "Don't be afraid, this kid has all the resources in place no matter how you look at it."
"Lin Jingming, what I'm worried about is not the issue of resources, but the fact that raising a child requires giving her a lot of time and love." Xia Zhitang didn't think clearly whether he could shoulder this responsibility.
"This is also a kind of resource. The young seedling is destined to have no lack of love. You don't have to worry about this. The main thing is to consider whether you are willing." Lin Jingming is quite looking forward to Xia Zhitang's child, even if this child inherits Gu Zian's genes.
"Little Qingmiao?"
"Given our friendship, it's not too much for me to give the baby in my belly a nickname." Lin Jingming always knows how to seize opportunities.
A message from Li Ke popped up on Xia Zhitang's phone: "Lin Jingming, I've already agreed with Li Ke on the shoot for the day after tomorrow."
"Okay, you can just rest in the hotel. I'll lead the team there."
"I'm just pregnant, not sick." Xia Zhitang still wanted to go with the filming.
"It's because the filming for the college entrance exam was too tiring that caused the bleeding. Can you just stay calm and get through the early stages?" Lin Jingming looked at Xia Zhitang's face and thought of a compromise. "How about this? Let's work on the manuscript outline tomorrow. I'll lead the team to film the day after tomorrow, and you stay at school to consult Principal Wang."
Xia Zhitang then reluctantly agreed to Lin Jingming's plan. After all, the manuscript was the skeleton of the film, and she didn't know how long she could stay here, so she had to push forward the subsequent finishing work as much as possible.
After Xia Zhitang finished discussing work with Principal Wang, Principal Wang glanced at Xia Zhitang's cup of warm water and asked, "Tang, have you been to the hospital for a checkup?"
Xia Zhitang hesitated for a moment, smelled the ointment on Principal Wang's body, and nodded.
Although she was somewhat sensitive to smells now, she found Principal Wang's scent reassuring. Perhaps it was because her mother, in her memory, also had this lingering scent of traditional Chinese medicine.
"Principal Wang, do you have children?" Xia Zhitang couldn't help but want to ask this female teacher who was over fifty years old.
Principal Wang pushed up his glasses and looked at the green ivy on the windowsill, a trace of memory on his face: "I was pregnant once, but I was too weak to keep the baby."
She turned her gaze to Xia Zhitang and patted the back of her hand: "But I have many, many children. The students here and the children in the orphanage are all my children."
"What kind of existence do you think a mother is?" Xia Zhitang was a little confused. She had no idea about the identity of a mother.
Principal Wang glanced at Xia Zhitang's abdomen from the corner of his eye, picked up the teacup and took a sip of hot tea before slowly answering, "For me, mother is not a noun of status, but a verb in the ongoing tense."
She stood up and pulled out a photo album from the bookshelf, which contained photos of the orphanage where Principal Wang had once stayed.
"Most of the children here were abandoned at birth. Blood may give them life, but I think a mother's responsibility is to accompany and guide them." Although Principal Wang regrets that she has no blood-related children, she feels that she has become a mother from another level.
She pulled out another photo album, which contained group photos of all the girls' high school graduates.
"Her parents have been working away from home and never come back during the holidays, leaving the child to be raised by her brother. Her father is domestically violent, and the young girl often fights with her father. Her mother died early, and her father just wanted to send her away as soon as possible in exchange for a dowry..." The female students in the photo basically have no normal family relationships, and their mother may be just a vague and not beautiful symbol to them.
"But in my heart they are my children. What they need is a spiritual mother who can pass on love to them, light the light of hope for them in reality, and guide them to live out their own lives." Principal Wang's fingertips stroked the faces of each girl in the photo.
"They are all doing well now. One of them went to Taipei and sent me a photo of someone standing on the Great Wall."
"She has now become a grassroots civil servant at the Women's Federation, helping many little girls like her."
"This person is now a nurse and is supporting her sister's college education."
…
Principal Wang's face had a maternal glow, warm, gentle, yet full of power.
"Tang, what is a mother? A mother is someone who guides a young life, helps it experience the beauty of the world, and helps it soar to a wider world."
Principal Wang held Xia Zhitang's hand and patted the back of her hand gently. "Although the term 'mother' is great and beautiful, I believe that women choose to give birth to a new life only when they truly desire to be a mother."
She looked at the children in the album and said: "Before a woman becomes a mother, she must first become an independent person. This is what I hope my children can learn."
Principal Wang's calloused hands gently stroked the back of Xia Zhitang's hand, conveying the warmth and power of motherhood to her heart.
"Being a mother is a difficult and extremely long process, but every woman should have the right to choose whether to accept this identity, rather than being forced into becoming a biological mother."
"Are you worried that you won't be able to handle this role well?" Xia Zhitang subconsciously stroked her belly.
"I just want to have a clear conscience. No one is perfect, but I am willing to learn little by little and strive to be the best I can be."
Principal Wang laughed as he recounted the first time he cared for a newborn baby at the orphanage: "I was even more flustered than Teacher Ye's husband when I first held a baby. But after taking care of this baby so many times, I naturally learned the ropes."
She smiled and comforted Xia Zhitang: "It's normal for people to feel panic and fear when they become mothers for the first time, but they will learn it slowly."
“Do you think being a mother is a wonderful thing?”
“Love flows in both directions. The more you love, the more you can appreciate the beauty of life.”
Xia Zhitang recalled the infinitely fond look in his mother's eyes when she was dying, and suddenly felt that there was no need to be so timid in life.
She has experienced many twists and turns and helplessness in her life, but she has never regretted being her parents' daughter.
Perhaps, Xiao Qingmiao was so eager to become her own child that it tried so hard to take root in her belly.
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