Chapter 110 I am Fu Mingshuang
I didn’t do well in school since I was young.
I thought studying was a way out for the poor and had nothing to do with me, because I had endless money and free time.
When I was 16, An Qian, who was still in college, became my tutor.
I like her very much. She is one of the few sunny and cheerful people in my life. She loves to laugh and is very gentle.
She said that since I was born in such a family, I should study hard and make some changes to the world.
I listened to her and started to study seriously.
She has a boyfriend who is said to be a top student in the law school. He comes to pick An Qian up every night after class.
My home in Shanghai is often empty, and Fu Zhenchuan rarely comes home. I hope An Qian can stay with me.
One night, her boyfriend said he had something to do at school and would be late, so I begged An Qian to stay, but this time, that beast Fu Zhenchuan came back drunk.
In the middle of the night, An Qian's crying woke me up. When I rushed over, I witnessed the beast committing violence.
I picked up a chair and hit him with it. He kicked me in the stomach, scolded me for ruining his plans, pulled up his pants and left.
But An Qian was still hurt.
I suggested calling the police, but An Qian said she didn't want to.
She stopped coming to my house. She dropped out of school and left the capital.
After several twists and turns, I finally found out that she had gone to Hong Kong Island. That summer, I went to Hong Kong Island alone and searched for her for two months.
Fortunately, Hong Kong Island is not big, and I met her in a tea restaurant before leaving.
She no longer loves to laugh as much as before. She looks like a walking corpse with no light in her eyes, as if her soul has been taken away.
She said she didn't blame me, but seeing me would remind her of unpleasant experiences.
I hate that Fu Zhenchuan is my father. He's a scumbag who thinks the harm he inflicts on others only lasts for 10 minutes, but he doesn't realize that others will live in the shadow for the rest of their lives, and every minute and every second is torture.
Her boyfriend told me:
Please, don't come to her again, let her forget it.
I lowered my head and simply said okay.
I returned to Shanghai and developed a physical aversion to my home. I poured all my negative emotions into intense study, trying to numb myself.
I want to escape from this place and go to Hong Kong Island in the far south to study medicine.
Medicine can help people and, as An Qian said, change the world.
But one day, An Qian's boyfriend found me.
He said An Qian was not in good condition and hoped that I could go to Hong Kong Island to see her. This was his last resort.
So, I went to Hong Kong Island again.
An Qian was not as repulsive to me as last time, and she even smiled when she saw me.
She said, you have been in Hong Kong Island for so long, let me take you around.
She took me everywhere and smiled gently. I thought everything was going in the right direction, but I ignored the fact that the light in her eyes had long since disappeared.
One day, I found her lying in the bathroom with a box cutter in her hand.
I rushed forward and tried to grab the knife from her hand.
During the struggle, I could no longer tell whether it was me who cut her wrist with my own hands.
Blood suddenly gushed out of that small cut like crazy.
I was so scared that I almost fainted. When I realized what was happening, I quickly called 120.
Can……
An Qian stopped me.
She said that she was very happy that I could come to Hong Kong Island to accompany her during this period. This was our best memory, and she hoped it would be enough to offset the anxiety I would feel for the rest of my life.
Now, she wants to leave.
I cried...
I said, how can you leave? You still have me, Lawyer Shen, and you still have such a wonderful life.
"It's not good anymore. I feel like a drowned person who can't breathe anymore."
I held her wound in my hand, hoping the bleeding would slow down, but I could still feel the constant flow of heat flowing through my fingers, unable to hold it in or block it.
I knelt on the ground and begged her not to give up, begged her to let me call 120...
I looked at the blood gushing out of my palm and burst into tears.
But An Qian also begged me to let her go.
"I haven't asked you for anything, but this time, I beg you not to save me... You want me to live, but I want to be selfish for once. I don't want to suffer anymore, so I'm sorry, this pain will have to be borne by you. I'm sorry, Shuangshuang."
No, no, you can't just leave like this.
I tried my best to cover her wound, but her blood soon dyed the bathtub red.
I didn't know what else I could do except crying and begging her. I cried so hard that my lungs were broken, and the last words left in my mouth were:
Please, please...
I felt like my world was crumbling bit by bit as her blood drained away.
An Qian is getting weaker and weaker.
There were bursts of violent knocks on the door and her boyfriend was calling out from outside.
"An Qian, Lawyer Shen is here... Can we open the door?"
An Qian's face had turned pale. She lay in the bathtub, staring blankly at the ceiling.
"Help me tell Chen Ni that I'm sorry for him. I'm almost free now, so let him go free... Let him find someone he loves and spend the rest of his life with him."
I still tried in vain to cover her wound, crying and shaking all over, still mumbling: "Please, An Qian, please, please..."
But I don’t know what else I can ask for.
Finally, exhausted from crying, I collapsed on the cold bathroom floor.
In the last moment before I lost consciousness, I saw Chen Ni breaking in, and I also saw An Qian closing her eyes, shedding the last tear in the world.
Her life was disappearing bit by bit before my eyes and in my hands.
When I woke up, I was already lying in the hospital. I said I wanted to testify against Fu Zhenchuan, but Shen Ni said that it had been too long and there was almost no chance of convicting him.
Fu Zhenchuan sent me to a mental hospital on the grounds that I was mentally ill and stabbed An Qian.
I was not convinced by his accusations, but he threatened my life with the threat of injury and mental illness.
Trapped in a hospital bed, my resistance feeble and powerless, I picked up a fruit knife someone had left behind, the blade pressed against my skin...
It’s such a thin layer that the bluish-black blood vessels are clearly visible.
Tears of resentment and unwillingness flowed down my face, and finally, at the moment when blood oozed out,
I threw the fruit knife on the ground.
What did I do wrong? What did An Qian do wrong?
Why wasn't Fu Zhenchuan the one who died?
As for, how can I make myself feel better?
Go crazy, and the pain will go away.
***
Only a small candle remained, flickering faintly. The temporary area was illuminated again.
Fu Mingshuang blew out the lingering flame.
She actually... stopped crying?
Although tears welled up in her eyes, this time, she was able to face it fully.
Perhaps the tears that should have been shed had already dried up when Lu Shiyu was trapped.
So, because of this, when Lu Shiyu gave up on himself, Fu Mingshuang wanted to help him; when her roommate Wang Xiangting threatened to commit suicide, the always arrogant young lady gave in step by step; when Chi Yan cut his wrists for Sheng Shuran, she was also covered in bruises...
Because she had experienced that the person she cared about most lost his life bit by bit in front of her eyes and in her hands.
Lu Shiyu hugged her and let her lean on his arms.
The nights in Country C were very cold, and there was no heating in the temporary area. Lu Shiyu hugged her as much as possible and let her feel his body temperature.
"Lu Shiyu..."
"Um?"
"You should go back."
"Um……"
"Otherwise, the Lu family will find out that you were lost in the hospital and come to trouble me again."
"Hmm..." But he still didn't let go.
"When will you return home?"
"Two weeks from now."
Fu Mingshuang's heart sank. "Then... our separation agreement has just been in place for two years."
"Um……"
"I can unilaterally file for divorce."
"I know."
"Then when you come back, let's get a divorce."
The night was very quiet, with only the occasional hurried footsteps of support staff, the whistling sirens of ambulances, and the lingering cries in the distance...
"Okay." Lu Shiyu said.
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