Her eyes became a little blurry.
"I just want to know what your purpose is."
Su Jingyao's eyes became more and more sharp. In her opinion, no matter what you do, there is a purpose, but Qi Wanyin is walking a dead end for herself.
Qi Wanyin herself was confused. She slowly raised her head and looked at the tall pillars of the County Lord's Mansion with empty eyes.
"Purpose? There is no purpose, I just feel unwilling."
"I colluded with Canglang and intended to assassinate Your Majesty. I am already a dying man, so it's okay to talk to you about it."
Qi Wanyin's voice became low, as if she was telling a story that had nothing to do with her.
"Do you know what kind of life I lived in Canglang? Do you know how many insults I suffered in Canglang?"
"My mother is a noble princess of Canglang, but she got pregnant with a man from the Jun Kingdom before her marriage. In the eyes of all the nobles of Canglang, she is worse than a prostitute. Tell me, what kind of life do I lead in Canglang?"
Qi Wanyin could now calmly talk about all her sufferings, but her eyes still revealed hatred for the world.
"When I learned that His Majesty was attacking Canglang, I was very happy. I even lent His Majesty a helping hand, making it easier for him to defeat Canglang. I thought I could finally escape from the sea of suffering. His Majesty finally came to save me."
A trace of longing appeared on her face, but it quickly disappeared.
"Later, when we were returning, I didn't see His Majesty. Some soldiers were joking that His Majesty and the Queen were in love, and His Majesty was worried about the Queen, so he returned early."
Qi Wanyin's voice began to choke and tears welled up in her eyes.
"I was still sighing at the time, your majesty and the queen were so affectionate when they were young, and after so many years, their love is still as deep as ever."
She couldn't hold back her tears anymore and they fell.
"But when I returned to the Imperial City, I found out that His Majesty had long since abandoned his first wife and had fallen completely in love with another person!"
Qi Wanyin's voice trembled violently, and her body kept shaking with excitement. Her hands were clenched into fists so tightly that her knuckles turned white.
"So you pretended to like my brother in order to take revenge on me?"
Su Jingyao narrowed her eyes slightly, with a look of scrutiny and a hint of coldness in her eyes.
Although Qi Wanyin's experience made her feel emotional, there were too many people living miserably in this feudal world for various reasons.
At least Su Jingyao believed that Qi Wanyin's suffering was not caused by her.
If Su Jingyao wanted to retaliate against her because of these things, she would naturally not show mercy to Qi Wanyin.
When mentioning Su Jingxuan, Qi Wanyin's eyes were filled with tears, and her eyes became extremely gentle.
"On the way back, I had a great conversation with Minister Su, and I could sense that he seemed to like me a little."
Her voice trembled slightly, as if she was immersed in those beautiful memories.
"But...I don't deserve it!"
Qi Wanyin's tears welled up in her eyes, she covered her face with her hands and cried heartbreakingly.
She is too dirty, how can she be worthy of the handsome and elegant young man from the capital.
This time when she came back, she just wanted to live a simple life.
Qi Wanyin put down her hands, her eyes full of despair and inferiority.
"Someone like me doesn't deserve his love at all."
"So I never gave Minister Su a clear answer. After returning to the imperial city, I learned that the current queen was not Miss Ling, but Minister Su's sister."
"I don't hate you, and I have never thought of taking revenge on you. I hate Your Majesty!"
Qi Wanyin raised her head abruptly, and her voice became sharp.
"When he married Miss Ling, I asked him tactfully that I was willing to be his concubine as long as I could marry him, but he rejected me and vowed that he would only love Miss Ling in his life."
Qi Wanyin clenched her fists tightly, her nails almost digging into her palms.
"How could he be so cruel, how could he do this to me!"
"I was disheartened. Junguo no longer had a father, and the Qi family never acknowledged me. There was no place for me in Junguo. In order to fulfill the wishes of His Majesty and Miss Ling, I went to Canglang alone to seek refuge with my mother."
Qi Wanyin's eyes were empty, as if her soul had been taken away.
"Since Your Majesty later married so many women, what did my leaving mean?"
"If he had never rejected me, everything I've experienced wouldn't have happened. I hate him. How could he feel at ease falling in love with another person?"
Qi Wanyin became more and more collapsed as she spoke, her voice filled with tears, and she looked like a fallen leaf drifting in the wind, fragile and helpless.
She has already accepted that His Majesty and Miss Ling are together, she has accepted the miserable half of her life in Canglang, and she also accepts that she will never marry after returning to the kingdom.
But why, why did she have to know that His Majesty had fallen in love with someone else? Since he could marry someone else, why couldn't she do that? Is she so unworthy of love?
Her birth was a mistake, and no one had ever liked her in her life.
Minister Su... probably also likes Qi Wanyin, the well-educated, well-mannered and artistic lady from a noble family.
He never knew what the real Qi Wanyin looked like.
Su Jingyao sighed softly.
Jun Zechen was indeed arrogant when he was seventeen years old, and it was true that he would harshly reject women he didn't like.
Even when she married into the Eastern Palace, didn't she also listen to many ruthless words from Jun Zechen?
However, Su Jingyao was determined in her goal. No matter what means she used, she firmly believed that Jun Zechen would be tamed by her. Moreover, Su Jingyao's desire to pursue Jun Zechen was only to achieve her goal of becoming the queen.
Su Jingyao wanted every future generation of kings in the country to have her blood in their bodies and to send her son to the throne.
Moreover, Jun Zechen had never caused her any substantial harm from beginning to end. He had even fulfilled Su Jingyao's requests.
So Su Jingyao can accept Jun Zechen now.
Think about it the other way around, did Jun Zechen do anything wrong in the first place?
He just rejected a woman he didn't like, and he didn't know what Qi Wanyin would encounter in Canglang.
Even though Jun Zechen knew that Qi Wanyin would not live better in Canglang than in Junguo, returning to Canglang was Qi Wanyin's own decision. Could it be that Jun Zechen rejected her and then tried to keep her in Junguo?
If Jun Zechen didn't care about Qi Wanyin, given his cold personality, it would be impossible for him to keep her, or even that he didn't care at all.
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