Chapter 220 Madness
How come she never noticed before that Song Heng was so prone to overthinking?
What do you want to do to look at houses together?
Or is it the wedding room?
Xia Zhen found these words to be utterly ridiculous.
This is really strange. Song Heng doesn't seem to understand Xia Zhen at all, but he can guess what she's thinking just from her words and actions, or even just a glance.
When he and she came to see the house, she was very enthusiastic and even dragged him along to plan what should be placed where. But now, she didn't even glance at the details of the house that he had arranged according to her preferences.
She didn't care.
Song Heng realized this, and after a long silence, he said, "Zhenzhen, do you believe in rebirth?"
Xia Zhen suddenly looked at him.
He said, "Do you think I'm even crazier? But I'm not lying to you, I really have been reborn."
Xia Zhen finally understood where the sense of unease she felt towards Song Heng came from.
On the day of the banquet, Song Heng did not choose her according to the script. Was he reborn at that moment?
It seems that from that day on, he began to hate her especially.
Xia Zhen couldn't help but suspect that Song Heng had also learned about the original plot of this world and knew what the "Xia Zhen" in the story would do, which was why he viewed her with prejudice.
But Song Heng's next words surprised her.
“In that part of my life, you were my fiancée, and we…we loved each other very much.” Song Heng spoke the last two words with particular difficulty; his dry voice sounded like that of a prisoner who had been trapped for a long time—hoarse and pained.
He said, "You won't transfer schools, we'll get into university together, we'll go on dates to amusement parks, we'll go to the movies together, we'll go shopping together..."
Song Heng closed his eyes briefly, as if to catch his breath. He opened them and looked at her with an incredibly soft gaze. "We'll be no different from any other couple."
His words were not embellished with fancy language; these everyday trivia were described in plain language, yet it took him a great deal of effort to do so.
It seemed that in his eyes, he and she were truly happy in the past.
Xia Zhen quickly calmed down. "If we were in love, why would you hate me so much after you were reborn?"
Song Heng said with difficulty, "I...I made a mistake."
Xia Zhen waited quietly for him to finish speaking.
He lowered his eyes, not daring to look her in the eye. "Zhenzhen, I misunderstood you. I thought you... abandoned me."
"Wouldn't it be better to just clear up the misunderstanding?"
He gripped her hand tighter. "I don't have the courage to come to you."
Yes, he wouldn't dare.
At that time, he lost his status as the eldest son of the Song family. Those who used to flatter him almost all turned their backs on him. In a short period of time, he experienced too much of the coldness and indifference of the world.
That was truly the most difficult time of his life. The ridicule and sarcasm of others, along with the rough edges of life, were constantly trying to wear down his unruly nature. Even though he was unwilling to admit defeat and be looked down upon, he stood tall in the face of every bit of sarcasm.
But deep down he knew very well that he felt inferior whenever he saw a pretty and delicate girl come to his small rented room to see him.
There are so many voices outside saying that Song Heng is no longer good enough for the eldest daughter of the Xia family. Occasionally, just occasionally, he would wake up in the middle of the night and think that he really was not good enough for her.
At that time, he simply couldn't provide her with the life she wanted.
Even though she was trying her best to give him more security, this unease, mixed with inferiority and guilt, was growing wildly in his heart.
So when that scene unfolded before his eyes, he didn't have the courage to ask her directly.
The arrogant and domineering young master Song, in the end, was actually a cowardly coward.
He was afraid of hearing any words from her mocking his overestimation of himself, and even more afraid that she would say, "Song Heng, I don't want you anymore."
It's a strange thing. He had the courage to walk into the traffic and end his life, but he didn't have the courage to hear her say, "I don't want you anymore."
Even now, the scene from that day still keeps replaying in his mind.
Looking at her, a faint light flickered in Song Heng's dark eyes. "Zhenzhen, I did think about not bothering you. I just wanted to catch a few more glimpses of you from afar, but I couldn't control myself."
How could that boy be so close to her? How could he hug her and kiss her?
The spot next to her should have belonged to him.
Song Heng also felt like he was a pervert. These past few days, he had been following her from a distance, watching her chat and laugh with her classmates, watching her and Lu Jin be affectionate, and watching many boys behind her cast envious glances at Lu Jin...
That's ridiculous.
He could have had it all easily, but in the end he grasped nothing.
Xia Zhen didn't know whether Song Heng was telling the truth or not, but she didn't care whether it was true or false. She asked, "So you've come to me now because you think you can make up for your mistakes?"
“Yes,” he said. “Zhenzhen, let’s start over, just like before. I will…”
Song Heng pursed his lips slightly, his expression vulnerable. "I will try my best to be good to you, just like before. You like me, okay?"
"And then?" Xia Zhen asked, amused. "When another misunderstanding arises in the future, will you look at me with the same eyes you used to look at an enemy?"
Song Heng: "I was set up, Zhenzhen..."
Xia Zhen: "Stop making excuses. In the end, it's just that you don't trust the Xia Zhen you're talking about."
Song Heng was speechless.
Xia Zhen softened her tone again, "Song Heng, I already have someone I like. As for the past you mentioned, I haven't experienced it myself, so in my opinion, it's just a story. Since you've been reborn, you have more chances to start your life over again than anyone else in the world. Why don't you seize this opportunity to make your life better? It's not worth wasting your time on me."
Song Heng remained silent for a long time.
Just when Xia Zhen thought the man was about to return to normal, she heard him chuckle.
He lowered his eyes and stared at the girl's small face, and slowly said, "Without you, my life would never have gotten better."
People who have abandoned reason will no longer use reason to think.
Xia Zhen had no intention of putting on an act with him. She said with annoyance, "Your life has nothing to do with me."
He asked, "Is that related to Lu Jin?"
Xia Zhen gave a sarcastic smile, "What do you think? I remember Young Master Song never likes to touch things that other people have touched, right? Lu Jin and I have already..."
"I know you've already done it."
Xia Zhen was slightly taken aback.
The aloof boy stroked her face, a smile playing on his lips. "I must admit I mind, but it's okay, I'll erase all traces he left behind."
He is now completely disregarding the consequences.
Xia Zhen pushed away his hand that was on her face, her expression blank.
She was scared.
Because he could feel the wrist he was gripping trembling slightly.
Strangely enough, he felt a surge of pleasure, after all, she was finally looking at him with such serious eyes.
However, the next second, a wave of sorrow surged in his heart.
There was a commotion outside.
Huang Mao cried out in terror from outside the door, "Boss, Lu Baimao is here!"
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