Ru Hua glanced at Liu Fengjiao indifferently, then shook her head.
"Why don't you believe me? To tell you the truth, such strange things have happened around me."
There was once a man who went to the outhouse in the middle of the night, but somehow, in his dazed state, he fell into the latrine.
When they pulled him out, he claimed he'd been kicked in, but there were no other customers besides him at the time.
Nobody paid any attention, assuming he was half asleep and accidentally fell in.
But a few days later, another person fell into the trap, and the madam had no choice but to find someone knowledgeable to help her take a look.
You wouldn't believe it until you see it; it's called "ghost licking buttocks."
A certain kind of filthy ghost has a particular fondness for eating filth, but if something doesn't suit its taste, it will viciously kick people's butts.
"Ruhua, please stop talking, I'm scared!" Liu Fengjiao covered her ears and shook her head.
Grandma Chen also felt a chill run down her spine, and grabbed Grandpa Chen's arm, saying, "Stop talking nonsense! I've only ever heard of 'ghost wall' and 'sleep paralysis,' but I've never heard of 'ghost licking buttocks.' You're just trying to scare people!"
"Ruhua, don't talk nonsense. There's no such thing in the world." Old Man Chen was also so frightened that he kept wiping the cold sweat from his forehead.
Ru Hua snorted lightly, "Dad, don't disbelieve me. Why don't you go to the outhouse and squat for a while? Who knows, you might get 'licked by a ghost' too."
"Oh my goodness, why would I squat in the latrine for no reason?" Old Chen instinctively covered his buttocks with his hand.
Grandma Chen swallowed hard. "Ruhua, is what you're saying true?"
"How could this be fake? I burned the paper myself in the outhouse last time, and no one has fallen in since."
As Ru Hua spoke, she looked at Old Lady Chen as if she had remembered something.
"Mother, think about it carefully. Isn't it a bit strange that a fire suddenly broke out behind the house? Some things are mysterious and inexplicable, but we have to believe them!"
"Yes, yes, I had completely forgotten about it if you hadn't mentioned it." Old Mrs. Chen looked uneasy. "Luckily, someone shouted at the time, otherwise that fire would have burned the house down."
Old Chen was stunned when he heard this. "Old woman, who shouted 'Fire has broken out'?"
"Never mind who shouted it, hurry up and go check if the fire is out."
"It's dead, it's dead, it should be dead." Old Chen didn't dare go out alone, afraid of being kicked in the butt by something unclean. He quickly looked at Chen Zhancai, "Son, are you alright?"
Chen Zhancai stared wide-eyed in terror, and it took him a while to recover. He said in a tearful voice, "Ruhua, are you telling the truth? Don't scare me, I'm timid."
“Husband, when have I ever scared you? This really happened.” Ru Hua put on a serious face. “Think about it carefully. Didn’t you feel a cold wind in your buttocks and then your body flew out?”
"That's right. I was just about to pull up my pants when I felt a 'whoosh' of cold air, followed by a sharp pain in my butt, and then I fell into the poop pit."
"That's right, you must be possessed by an evil spirit."
"Oh my goodness, how could a decent man like me encounter a ghost!" Chen Zhancai's mind was in a mess, and he couldn't quite make sense of it.
The more he thought about it, the more frightened he became. Luckily, they kicked him into the cesspool. If they had really choked him from behind, he would have been dead!
Old Mrs. Chen was also terrified and her face turned pale. "Ruhua, since you know about this place, then you should quickly help us break the curse and stop that thing from haunting our family. Otherwise, we won't dare to go out to use the outhouse at night."
“Mother, don’t be afraid. Leave this to me. But you still need to go out to relieve yourself. You can’t urinate in your pants. Just shout a few times when you go to the outhouse to scare away any unclean things and everything will be fine.”
"We don't know how to promote it!"
"It's not hard at all. Just shout a couple of times, like, 'I'm here to pee, get out of the way!' or 'I'm here to poop, I didn't bring any toilet paper...'"
"Is it really that simple?" Old Mrs. Chen asked, looking puzzled.
Ru Hua nodded seriously, "It's that simple. As long as that stinky ghost gets the paper money, we can scare it away by shouting loudly, and then we won't have to worry about going to the outhouse anymore."
"Alright, alright, you have experience with this. Prepare some paper money for the dead tomorrow, and I'll leave this to you."
"Don't worry, Mom, I promise I'll scare that stinky ghost away," Ruhua patted her chest and assured her.
Old Chen didn't want to hear any more ghost stories; if they kept going, he wouldn't dare go out at night anymore. He quickly interrupted.
"Alright, that's settled then. Stop talking and go check on Zhancai. What's wrong with him?"
Upon hearing this, Old Mrs. Chen turned to look at Chen Zhancai and saw him trembling. She quickly asked, "Son, are you alright?"
"Mom, I feel nauseous and want to vomit."
"Good son, you just vomited up bile, don't vomit anymore, just bear with it!"
"No, Mother, I feel like there's still a taste of shit in my mouth," Chen Zhancai said, gagging again.
Grandma Chen was heartbroken and sighed anxiously, "This constant vomiting isn't a solution!"
Liu Fengjiao covered her nose and took two steps back. "Mother, don't worry. Just let Zhancai spit out what's in his mouth. He might be hungry again soon."
“Yes, you’re right.” Old Mrs. Chen thought it made sense and hurriedly instructed Ru Hua, “Ru Hua, quickly go and prepare something to eat for Zhan Cai.”
"Alright, I'll go right away." Ru Hua casually asked Chen Zhancai, "Husband, how about I make you some porridge?"
"Don't mention the word porridge to me, that stuff is disgusting, I won't eat anything." Chen Zhancai's mind was filled with sticky stuff, and he couldn't help but vomit again.
Grandma Chen looked anxious as she patiently tried to persuade her.
"Zhancai, I know you're not feeling well, but it's just an accident. Don't take it too seriously, you'll feel better in a few days."
Chen Zhancai gave a bitter smile. "Damn it, falling into the latrine is a small matter, but my reputation is a big deal. If everyone knows that I fell into the latrine, how will I ever be able to face anyone again!"
"What's the big deal? Let them talk. What farmer hasn't fallen into a latrine before? Right, old man?" Old Mrs. Chen looked at Old Mr. Chen, signaling him to quickly help persuade him.
Old Chen chimed in, “Yes, yes, your mother is right. Farmers clean the latrines every year, and who hasn’t gotten splashed? Besides, our village’s simpleton has fallen into the latrine four or five times, and nobody laughs at him.”
Ru Hua also chimed in, "Husband, don't forget, you're a scholar. Even if those peasants had the guts, they wouldn't dare to laugh at you. If anyone is so ignorant, just keep it in mind, and when you pass the imperial examination, we'll settle accounts with them."
After hearing this, the others nodded in agreement...
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