My name is Lin Feng. I've liked An Shuyi for many years. I still remember the first time I saw her was at school. But at that time, she didn't like racing. No, I should say that she couldn't drive back then.
She was probably only seventeen years old. After all, she was a freshman in college at that time, and I was a junior. I could drive around and have fun. She was so beautiful back then. Even though she had only been in college for a few days, many people already knew her.
Many senior and junior students sent her love letters, but at that time, she didn't like any of them. She followed Xia Hua around every day, obedient and well-behaved. Her classmates even confessed to her, but unsurprisingly, they didn't like her.
I wanted to go too, but I didn't dare because I was afraid of being rejected. I could only watch from a distance every day. I wanted to take some photos, but Xia Hua was too perceptive. I only took one photo before I was discovered. As expected, my phone was taken away, the photos inside were deleted, and I was warned.
Lu Yuanyue said that what I was doing was wrong, that I shouldn't take pictures without other people's permission. I knew that, but I just couldn't help myself. But I never took any more pictures after that, and I just watched from a distance every day.
I liked An Shuyi for two years, until the year I graduated from university. There was a race where I saw An Shuyi, who was known as the good girl. That day, she was as beautiful as a goddess, wearing a red dress, high heels, and curly hair cascading down her back.
She was completely different from how she was at school, but no matter who she was, she still captivated me. We started a competition, and watching her easily surpass me, I knew that I was destined to lose in this lifetime.
After the match, I wanted to go up and say a few words, but before I could, she had already left, and I could only leave disappointed. After that, I would come whenever there was a match, but she didn't come often.
Perhaps because of the many matches we played, we started talking, and that's how I learned that Lu Yuanyue liked Xia Hua. But he didn't like her as much as I did. At least I dare say that he could only keep it to himself, which was pretty miserable because he didn't get a response.
Because of racing, we've spent a lot of time together and got along quite well. I thought that if I had enough time, I could find a time to confess my feelings and have a chance. Unfortunately, it didn't work out because they hadn't been to the races for a long time.
A few months later, I received a call from Ye Liangmu. He said that An Shuyi and Xia Hua would be racing the next night. I was overjoyed when I heard this news. I hesitated for a long time, wondering whether I should confess my feelings. But Lu Yuanyue advised me not to. If I failed, we might not even be able to remain friends.
Helpless, I could only wait for the right opportunity. That evening, I waited there early because I had been there too many times when she was there. Everyone knew that I liked An Shuyi, so they were all wondering if she would show up tonight. Sure enough, she came.
Driving the latest sports car, I heard there are only two of these cars in the whole country, and you can't buy them even if you have money. I didn't expect An Jia to be so generous as to buy both of them in one go.
As I watched her get out of the sports car, I don't know why, but she looked even more beautiful now, with an air of quiet authority, like a queen. Amidst the spectators' amused gazes, I went up to greet her, but her reaction was quite strange.
Although she wasn't particularly enthusiastic in the past, she'd never been this cold. But considering that girls are often unpredictable, I didn't pay much attention and kept talking to her. However, before long, the competition started, and she won again, just like before.
It seems that no matter which time it is, as long as I compete against her, I am destined to lose. In fact, my skills are not that bad. I have won quite a few awards. Even Lu Yuanyue can't beat me. But as long as An Shuyi is in a competition, I will always be the one to lose.
After the competition, Ye Liangmu organized everyone to go out for dinner, which I have to say was exactly what I wanted. I originally wanted to invite her separately, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Now I finally had a chance, so we went out for dinner together and then went to a bar to sing. Watching everyone toast her, I felt really sorry for her.
Actually, I have a very low alcohol tolerance; I can only drink three small glasses at most. But I still stood up to help her avoid drinking. Unexpectedly, this angered the others, who started to force me to drink. After a few glasses, I don't know what happened after that.
The next day, Lu Yuanyue told me that after I got drunk last night, An Shuyi had an exceptionally high alcohol tolerance and drank everyone under the table. She would drink anyone who dared to offer her a toast, and she also said that she already had a boyfriend.
When I heard this, I felt breathless. If she were by my side, I might have asked her why she couldn't give me a chance. But I will never have the chance to say those words again, because she is about to get engaged.
Wow, it all happened so fast! Just a minute ago I found out she had a boyfriend, and now I know she's getting engaged. I didn't even have a chance to try and win her over. When I found out who her boyfriend was, I was filled with resentment. He's just a poor guy, how come he can win her heart?
I started to regret it. If I had confessed earlier, would I have had a chance? Unfortunately, there is no medicine for regret in this world, nor is there any possibility of turning back time.
I went to see her engagement, but I could only watch from afar. She was still as beautiful as ever, smiling happily at the man next to her. It's a pity that the man wasn't me. Before I saw her, I wondered if she was forced into it, but in the end, I was just overthinking it.
Watching them enter the hotel, I could only leave dejectedly. I was drunk after three drinks, so I drank three bottles straight down and lay in the room for three days before waking up. If Lu Yuanyue hadn't come looking for me, I would still be lying on the floor. Fortunately, time is the best healer, and I'm ready to forget her.
I can't forget her. She has already found happiness. If I disturb her again, it won't be good for anyone. But just when I thought I was about to forget her, I saw her again. I don't know why, but every time I see her, she seems more beautiful than the last.
She had just come out of the restroom. I hadn't seen her in a long time. She had gained a little weight, but it didn't affect her beauty. Lu Yuanyue invited her to sit in the private room for a while, but she declined, saying that she had come with her family. I could only watch her leave.
Lu Yuanyue said that he was not worthy of a rich lady like her. Thinking about it, that made sense. If he were worthy, he wouldn't be standing here and could only watch silently. I saw her and her family leave, but I didn't go to say hello.
I thought I had almost forgotten, but that was just wishful thinking. Forgetting someone is not so easy. Some people need a few months, some need a few years, some need a few decades, and some even need a lifetime.
I think it might take me a lifetime to forget An Shuyi.
(It's already in my heart, how can I forget it!)
November 3, 2023 (End)
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