Chapter 40 No matter how big your heart is, you will go crazy, right?
"What?" Shi Xiaoai took the envelope.
Cheng Yang raised his chin and motioned for her to look for herself.
Shi Xiaoai opened the envelope and saw a thick stack of money and various bills inside.
The tickets were scattered and colorful, and she couldn't tell what they were or how many there were.
But the money was all in red Great Unity notes, all new bills, so thick a stack that must have been worth at least a thousand yuan.
Shi Xiaoai's hand seemed to be burned by fire, and she quickly stuffed the money back into Cheng Yang's hand.
Cheng Yang obviously expected her to do this, and he quickly dodged to the side, leaving Xiao Ai with an empty space.
She put the money directly on the bedside table and said, "I don't want it, you take it back."
The smile on Cheng Yang's face disappeared, just like the first day he met Shi Xiaoai. He didn't say a word and just stood there looking at her quietly.
Shi Xiaoai thought for a moment, sat down in front of the bed, and then pointed to a bench beside her and said, "Cheng Yang, sit down. I think we need to talk again."
The expression on Cheng Yang's face turned serious. He sat down on the stool silently, looked at Shi Xiaoai, and waited quietly for her to speak.
Shi Xiaoai didn't express her thoughts first, but asked, "Cheng Yang, I haven't had the chance to ask you, are you here on vacation or transferred back? Or have you changed your job?"
Cheng Yang said calmly, "It's just a temporary vacation."
Shi Xiaoai was a little confused about what he meant by "temporarily", but she didn't pursue the matter. Instead, she continued to ask, "How long will your leave be? Will you return to your original unit after your leave?"
Cheng Yang replied, "These are still undecided. I'm on sick leave now, and it's unrealistic to return to my original unit before I'm fully recovered. So how long I'll take off depends on how well I recover. As for whether I'll continue to stay in the army or transfer to civilian work, that's up to you. I'm open to either."
Shi Xiaoai didn't expect him to say that, and a hint of surprise flashed in her eyes.
She shook her head. "You can stay here during your vacation. You don't have to worry about the family affairs. Just help me take good care of Mingxi. It's just right that you two can recuperate together."
I will take care of Mingrui myself, and then let him go to the stall with me when the time comes.
As for your future, that's up to you to decide. I won't get involved.
When it comes to your future career, who can see it more clearly than you? Whether to stay in the army or leave, that's definitely your decision."
Hearing her distance herself from him so clearly, fearing any involvement, Cheng Yang felt a pang of pain in his heart.
He didn't respond, and the room fell silent for a moment.
The silence was uncomfortable and a little awkward.
Shi Xiaoai moved her body and took the initiative to express her thoughts.
She said, "Cheng Yang, what I said to you in the hospital that day was not out of anger, nor was it a complaint. It was what I really felt. Frankly speaking, I'm used to being independent and I'm not prepared to continue being a couple with anyone, including you.
I know you're a good person, and if we live together you'll definitely treat me and our children well, but... when two people live together, there has to be some affection."
"No feelings can be cultivated." Cheng Yang suddenly interrupted.
Shi Xiaoai paused, then nodded in agreement, "Yes, but I don't have the energy or the desire to cultivate feelings anymore."
She smiled bitterly and looked up at the sky: "Life is hard enough, so why not force yourself to do something you don't want to do?"
She thought of her parents and brother in another world, and her harmonious home.
She loved her home and her family very much, but all of this disappeared when she was completely unprepared.
The sadness and pain left for her will not disappear if you don't say it or think about it.
Shi Xiaoai can face all the difficulties that will come her way bravely, but she dare not imagine what will happen to her if the same situation happens again?
Even if you have a big heart, you will go crazy, right?
She had made a promise to the original owner and her family that she would raise the two children well, so she would fulfill her promise and treat Mingrui and Mingxi well.
Apart from this, Shi Xiaoai doesn't want to have any entanglement with this world anymore.
I don't even want to touch anything related to feelings.
Cheng Yang looked at Shi Xiaoai, and at this moment he suddenly felt an inexplicable panic in his heart.
Xiao Ai had said something like she had no feelings for him before, but he had never felt as far away from his wife as he did now, as if she would disappear if he couldn't catch a glimpse of her and would never come back to him.
Without thinking, he said loudly: "You don't have to do it, I'll do it! You don't have to do anything you don't want to do, I can do it. I can cultivate feelings and get close to you! But Xiao Ai, you have to give me a chance and don't give up on me."
His voice started out loud, then got softer and softer, but his eyes, on the contrary, became more and more scorching. He stared at Shi Xiaoai closely, his heart full of desire without any concealment.
Shi Xiaoai, who was originally sad, couldn't help but subconsciously choose to avoid such a look.
Seeing that her attitude had softened, Cheng Yang immediately stepped forward and stuffed the envelope back into her hand.
As if afraid she would refuse again, he said quickly, "The various tickets in here are all exchanged by my comrades. There's a mess of all kinds, and many of them have date restrictions. Please sort them out and pick out the ones you need to use soon so we can buy them quickly and don't let them go to waste."
"You keep the money. I know you have it, but I have expenses living at home, and it's my responsibility to support the family and children. Take it, don't push it away."
After saying that, he pulled Xiao Ai up and pressed the envelope hard with his other hand, then turned and left.
It's like being thrown out of the house if you're even a minute late.
Xiao Ai couldn't even bring herself to say no.
Seeing him running to the kitchen and starting to light a fire and cook with exaggerated movements, as if he wanted to show off how useful he was and that the family couldn't do without him, Shi Xiaoai sat there without moving.
She just thought of her parents and relatives, and she felt very uncomfortable. It was a little difficult for her to recover in such a short time.
But when she heard the various noises made by the man outside and the faint laughter of the children, she felt that her heart was not so empty anymore.
Shi Xiaoai leaned quietly on the bed, the tiredness hidden deep in her body sweeping over her.
She didn't want to hold on any longer, so she simply threw back the quilt and lay down.
Nestled in the soft and cozy new quilt, Xiao Ai suddenly remembered while half asleep and half awake -
I didn't tell anyone about my plan to divorce today.
Cheng Yang didn't give her such an opportunity at all.
She cursed the man in her heart, thinking that he was cunning and clever, knowing everything but being very good at pretending to be confused.
Shi Xiaoai warned herself in her heart that she must not be soft-hearted next time and must not let this person fool her again.
But what she didn't know was that while she was thinking about these things, the dimples at the corners of her lips appeared and there was a hint of smile in the corners of her eyes and eyebrows.
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